Last Man by Kayleefaye

Last Man von Kayleefaye

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Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Stargate: Atlantis characters, etc.

Rodney stood at the edge of the spray-slick pier, his hands thrust deep in his pockets and his shoulders hunched, staring bleakly at the sun setting into the calm ocean. He felt exhausted; old and unutterably lonely.

Behind him, the city�s lights began to flicker in existence, illuminating the surrounding ocean. It was a sight familiar to Rodney: he had seen it almost every night for four years. But this night it felt wrong. It disturbed him that such mundane occurrences continued as if nothing had happened. He had spent the day wandering the hallways, feeling violated. How could Atlantis be so full of life yet be so cold and empty?

Rodney knew the reputation for pessimism he had earned with his graphic predictions of doom. But he had never really believed them. Not deep down, where it counted. He had secretly envisioned futures where the Wraith were defeated and they spent the rest of their careers happily exploring the Pegasus galaxy in safety.

Somehow they had all been there in those dreams.

Once he had been na�ve enough to think he would never have to experience the excruciating pain of loss. That fantasy had been shattered the day Carson died. Even then, he had foolishly assumed that was as bad as it got. Then they lost Elizabeth.

This was much, much worse.

Sheppard had been the first. It was a nightmare they all had in the Stargate program, wasn�t it? To step into the event horizon but never step out? A shudder ran down Rodney�s spine. He had managed to determine what had happened, but he almost preferred ignorance. Flung 48,000 years in the future. Who knew what hell awaited Sheppard then?

Teyla had been next. Had she seen her infant son before Michael took him away for his twisted experiments and, having no more use for her, murdered her in cold blood? The memory of her, never getting angry with him no matter how much a pain in the ass he was, made pressure build up painfully behind his eyes.

And then there was Ronon. Ronon had never said much, but he had always listened. Somehow he had been able to look past Rodney�s imperfections. He had never hesitated to risk his life again and again for the people who had accepted him. He had just done it one time too many.

So now Rodney was the last man, standing alone and abandoned. There was no Sheppard to argue with; no Teyla to smile and tell him they were going to make it; no Ronon to loom in the background, a silent yet comforting presence.

Had they known how much they meant to him? Had they known, for all his protestations, how much he depended on them? When had he stopped heckling them long enough to look them in the eye and simply say �thank you?� Now they were gone and he would never have the chance.

They had been a family, a bickering, dysfunctional family, but a family nonetheless. Theirs had been bonds forged through shared dangers. Rodney had lost count of all the times he had saved his teammates� lives, not out of any heroic inclinations, but out of the need for the others to survive with him. He never spoke of it, but every time something happened and he thought, even for an instant, that he had lost one of his teammates, fear seared through him, piercing deep.

It was hard to believe they were gone. He still paused every once in a while, waiting for Sheppard�s sarcastic remark. When he entered the mess hall, he looked around for Ronon, digging into his over-filled plate. Or Teyla, roaming the terraces, restless yet content. He missed them so acutely the pain was a palpable ache in his chest.

Rodney narrowed his eyes against the salt-laden breeze rising off the water and made a decision. He would leave; leave Atlantis and return to Earth. He couldn�t stay here with the constant reminders of happier times, now lost beyond all hope of recall. He only hoped the ghosts of his friends wouldn�t follow him.

No, he changed his mind abruptly. He hoped they did. Then at least they would still be with him.

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Last Man von Kayleefaye

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