Returning Home von LE McMurray

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Kapitel Bemerkung: Thanks to Stonedtoad for betaing.
Next part is in progress, enjoy.
Alisa chuckled as JD dropped the three oranges he’d been juggling, hitting himself on the head.

“Nice,” she laughed as he grimaced, “That’ll impress Metcalfe.”

JD rolled his eyes, “Why do you think I’m trying to impress Metcalfe?”

“Cause your eyes follow her every time she leaves a room,” Alisa replied smugly, “Ask her out before this gets boring.”

JD shrugged, “Not sure she’s my type.”

“She’s smart, pretty and kick boxes,” Alisa ticked each off on a finger, “What more do you want?”

JD rolled his eyes, “I’ll think about it.”

Alisa laughed; she spotted her father across the room and gave him a quick wave receiving a soft nod back as he left the mess with John. As Rodney walked out Laura walked in with Ray and they quickly joined their team-mates.

“What’s going on with Rodney?” Laura asked as she dropped into the seat beside Alisa, “He and Sheppard didn’t look happy.”

“All I know is the IOA has sent someone to, and these are Dad’s words, cause problems where none exist because they’re bored,” Alisa grinned.

“Then the next few weeks are going to be a joy,” Laura sighed.

*********************************************

“Welcome to Atlantis, Mrs Patterson,” Woolsey greeted the blonde woman who stepped out of the wormhole.

“It’s incredible to be here, Mr Woolsey,” she replied, looking around at the Gateroom in awe turning back to him looking a little embarrassed, “I’m sorry, I’m just a little overwhelmed.”

“It happened to me the first time I came here too,” Woolsey replied with a chuckle, “Follow me and I’ll introduce you to the head of our military and scientific team. I warn you now, they’re an interesting pair.”

Patterson’s blue eyes crinkled in amusement, “I’m looking forward to it. I don’t actually have any information on the people I’m here to evaluate. Not even their names.”

“Well Colonel Sheppard and Dr McKay are interesting to deal with,” Woolsey told her, frowning as she stared at him, “Is something wrong?”

“McKay?”

Woolsey nodded.

“Oh,” she let out a long breath, “This might seem like an extremely stupid question but is his name Rodney McKay?”

Woolsey winced knowing this couldn’t be good, “Yes. Do you know him?”

“Know who?” John asked as he and Rodney arrived.

Patterson stood and spun staring at Rodney who was staring right back at her.

“Gentlemen, this is Mrs Patterson,” Woolsey introduced, “She’s here for the IOA evaluation.”

“Hi,” John greeted her aware that the woman probably didn’t even know he was there as she stared at his friend.

Rodney finally managed to speak, “Lis?”


Rodney knew this IOA evaluation was going to cause problems but he’d had no idea on what scale until this moment. Now he knew as he stared at the woman he’d been engaged to over twenty years ago who looked as though she wanted to bolt from the office and would have if he and John weren’t blocking the doorway.

“I think we should probably...” John trailed off and motioned to Woolsey to leave the room.

“Mrs Patterson, we’ll talk some more later,” Woolsey told her as he joined John and left them alone.

Rodney felt John shove him inside the room so that the door would close but he couldn’t take his eyes off the woman in front of him. Alisa Bonner, the woman he would have married, the woman he had never forgotten and the woman who was the mother of his daughter.

“You’re looking good, Rodney.”

Rodney jumped slightly as she broke the silence, “You too, Lis.”

“It’s Ali these days,” she told him before rushing on, “I had no idea you were here. The IOA gave me no information so it didn’t cloud the evaluation.”

Rodney sighed not knowing what to say; finally the worst possible thing came to mind.

“You’re married?”

Ali nodded, “Ten years now.”

“Any kids?”

“Two boys,” she replied, smiling at the thought, “Rodney...”

Rodney shook his head, “Welcome to Atlantis. I need to go, I have things to do.”

As he practically sprinted out Rodney wondered how he was going to tell Alisa about her ‘mother’ and how to tell Lis about Lissa.


“Hey,” Laura greeted Rodney as he entered his lab, “Just the person I was looking for.”

“What do you want, Cadman?” Rodney barked, “I’m busy.”

Laura rolled her eyes, “You know it’s always such a pleasure to talk with you, Rodney. But I am actually here for a reason.”

Rodney sighed, “What?”

“I need your questions for the Quiz Final,” Laura told him with a grin, “Radek versus Collins, it’s going to be a good night.”

“Sure,” Rodney sighed, “Come in and I’ll print them off for you.”

Laura followed him across the lab frowning at the complete lack of insults coming from Rodney; normally he’d managed to insult most of her family by now.

Laura took a seat on the stool watching him, “You want to tell me what’s wrong?”

“Why do you think something is wrong, Cadman?”

“Because you haven’t said one nasty thing about me since I got here,” she replied with a fond smile, “In fact I was expecting a chorus and two verses on the butterfly clip I’m wearing that my niece made me.”

“Is that what the glitter explosion is,” Rodney said half-heartedly.

“Sorry,” Laura replied with a grimace, “But you’re not convincing me.” Laura rested her hand on his arm, “You can talk to me, remember?” She tapped her temple, “I was in your head, Rodney. You can’t shock me.”

Rodney sighed and sat down, “You heard about the IOA evaluation?”

“Who didn’t?” Laura chuckled, “You and Sheppard have been going nuts about it.”

“Well, I know the woman the IOA sent,” Rodney confessed.

“Old girlfriend?”

Rodney nodded.

“Oh,” Laura whispered not sure what to say now and completely stunned by the next sentence out of Rodney’s mouth.

“It’s Alisa’s mother.”

*********************************************

Ali Patterson walked through the city of Atlantis wishing she could enjoy being here but all she could think of was the look on Rodney’s face as he left her standing. She’d never thought she’d see him again and then he was there in the most unlikely of places.

Guilt gnawed at her but she’d been so young when they’d been together, so young when she’d been ill, then the accident and losing the baby. She blamed Rodney for the accident because he’d been late to pick her up, then he’d told the doctor to start the treatment for the cancer after her miscarriage. When her mother asked her finally how she could possibly blame Rodney, Ali had replied that she didn’t mean to but at the time she felt he’d wanted rid of the baby so she could have her treatment and he wouldn’t be left alone. Her mother had been horrified she could even think something like that about Rodney. As much as they liked Jason and loved the boys she knew they still missed their adopted son Rodney.

Taking a deep breath Ali decided she had to talk to him properly, she just hoped he would stick around for the conversation. As she started towards the labs, according the map she’d been given, Ali spotted a young woman get into one of the transporters with one of the soldiers, they were talking and laughing but as the doors started to close the younger woman turned. For a fleeting moment Ali thought she was looking into a mirror or a mirror from twenty years ago but before she could get a proper look the doors closed hiding the face from her sight.


“What’s wrong?”

Alisa turned looking surprised to find JD standing beside her, “What?”

“Are you okay, McKay?” JD asked concerned as they left the transporter, “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“I...I think I did,” a crinkle appeared in her forehead as she contemplated the woman she’d just seen even for the second before the doors closed.

“Alisa?”

She rubbed her eyes, “I don’t know. Maybe I am working too hard.”

JD chuckled, “Nice to know it takes hallucinations for you to work that one out. I’ll keep that in mind.”

Before Alisa could retort her father’s voice sounded in her ear.

“Lissa, can you come to my lab?”

“Now?” she asked.

“If you can,” he replied before ending communication.

Alisa frowned as she turned to JD, “That’s odd. He sounds tired but wants to talk to me.”

“Well, once you’ve talked to him go get some rest,” JD clapped her shoulder before he headed to the gym where Ronon was waiting to kick his ass.


Rodney looked up relieved that his daughter was the one who walked through the door; he needed to tell her about their visitor before anyone else did or she caught sight of the woman.

“Hey, Dad,” Alisa greeted him with a smile, “You called?”

Rodney couldn’t stop the smile that touched his lips at her casual greeting that only a few months before had been stilted and shy, “I need to talk to you.”

“Oh those words never signify anything good,” Alisa grimaced as she pulled over a stool, “What did I do?”

Rodney laughed, “Paranoid?”

“You’re not kidding,” Alisa replied, “Those words used to be followed by me getting grounded and being given the worst possible jobs people around here could think of.”

“I promise this isn’t bad,” Rodney told her, trying to imagine her being young enough for him to ground.

“Then shoot.”

“You’ve heard about the IOA evaluation,” Rodney started not pausing for her to nod, “Well the woman here to do it is...well... I know her and you do too, kind of.”

Alisa frowned, before licking her lips slowly and whispering, “It’s Mom. Isn’t it?”

“How did you...”

“I thought I saw her a few minutes before you called,” Alisa told him, the stunned expression on her face becoming fear, “Are you going to tell her about me?”

“I have to,” Rodney replied, “I got the chance to know you, Lissa. I can’t deny her the same opportunity. Or you.”

Alisa rubbed a hand across her face, “I’ve never known her. I knew you. What if she can’t accept me?”

Rodney saw Alisa fighting tears but as one slipped down her cheek Rodney gently wiped it away, “Then she’s a fool.” Rodney wrapped his arms around his daughter holding her. He glanced up and saw Ali standing there.

“I should go,” Ali said as they looked over at her.

“Wait,” Rodney called after her, “We need to talk.”


Ali arrived at Rodney’s lab to find him hugging someone, embarrassed she wanted to leave but as he called her back Ali saw who was sitting on the stool and couldn’t stop staring.

“Wait,” Rodney called, “We need to talk.”

He moved to her and Ali found she was being moved to the other stool. As she sat she looked at the young woman she’d seen earlier.

“Hi,” the young woman whispered before she turned to Rodney, “Can you get on with this?”

Rodney gently squeezed the girl’s shoulder, “Sure. Lis...Ali...”

“Lis is fine,” Ali whispered.

Rodney nodded nervously, “Lis, I don’t know how much you know about the Stargate program.”

Ali shrugged, “I’ve read up on everything, other than the names of the team here on Atlantis.”

“Then you know about the Quantum Mirror,” Rodney said hopefully, smiling slightly as she nodded, “Okay, almost four years ago a girl came through the Quantum Mirror. There’s a long story I’m not going to get into right now but basically we couldn’t send her home and she stayed.”

“What does this have to do with the fact that my double bar twenty years is sitting here?” Ali demanded.

“Lis,” Rodney said before hesitating for a few seconds before he stood behind the girl and rested his hands on her shoulders, “I want you to meet Lissa, our daughter – from an alternate universe.”

Ali stared at them trying to find something to say, “No.”

“I should go,” Lissa whispered, Rodney gently squeezed her shoulder and she gave him a quick smile before leaving.

Ali spun as the young woman, her daughter? walked out the room, she turned back to where Rodney was standing looking at her sadly.

“That’s all you can say?” he demanded confused, “No?”

“What do you want from me?” Ali snapped back standing to face him, “You drop this on me and expect me to just accept it? Our baby died, Rodney. She died.”

“And then you left,” Rodney retorted, “You know the only reason I told you was because I know Lissa wanted to know you. You left then and you don’t deserve to be her mother now.”

As he marched out she shook her head, she’d been told her visit here would be interesting but she’d never expected this.

*********************************************

Laura sat in what in a few hours would be filled for the final of the quiz she and Carson had started so many years ago. He had been feeling homesick after getting a letter from one of his sisters giving him a blow by blow account of the pub quiz her husband had won. At this Carson decided to start an Atlantis monthly quiz, this then blossomed into three monthly heats culminating in the quarterly final and the fight for what became known after his death as the Carson Cup.

When Carson’s double appeared there was discussion about changing the name but Radek, who took over running things when Laura had been transferred back to Earth until her return, decided the name stayed and it was somehow assured that Carson would be on Atlantis for the final and present the cup. That would be next month though.

Laura jumped as Rodney burst into the room, he looked ready to explode but instead of saying anything he sat down and just sat there in silence.

“Rodney?” Laura asked after several minutes of nothing but angry silence.

“You always tell me I can talk to you,” he reminded her, “Well I need to talk to you.”

Surprise filled her and she stared at him for a few moments before taking the seat beside him, “Is everyone else off world?”

Rodney frowned at her but a smile tugged at his lips, “I just thought you might be able to help or even...I don’t know give me some perspective.”

Still stunned Laura nodded, “I’ll try my best. Tell me what’s wrong.”


Alisa sat on her favourite balcony with her knees pulled up against her chest trying to sort her head out. She’d never ever expected to be in this position, her mother had died a few hours after she’d been born and as much as Alisa wanted to meet her she knew she never would.
And then she was in another universe where Alisa Bonner had miscarried, been treated for cancer and was still alive.

At one point when she realised that her mother wasn’t dead Alisa wondered if she could meet her, even if they couldn’t tell her who she was but when her father told her she was on Atlantis and said he was going to introduce them properly Alisa was indescribably nervous but relieved.

Now she wasn’t sure what she felt.

“McKay,” JD’s voice made her look up, “I thought you were going to get some rest.”

“I will,” she whispered sadly, “Just needed some air.”

JD tilted his head, “What’s wrong, Alisa?”

“I just met my mother,” Alisa told him.

JD slid down the wall to sit at her side, “Wow. How’d it go?”

“It could have gone better,” she sighed, leaning against his arm, “All I know right now is that this is going to be an interesting few weeks.”


“Are you okay?”

Rodney stared at Laura astonished at her question, “What?”

“Are you okay?” Laura asked again, concern in her eyes as she rested her hand on his arm, “She obviously upset you.”

“I came to ask you to help Alisa,” Rodney reminded her.

“And I will,” Laura replied, matter-of-factly, “Once I know that you’re okay.”

Rodney continued to stare at her completely confused.

“This woman was someone you were going to marry,” Laura reminded him, “Technically she’s the mother of your daughter. I think I’m beginning to understand why you don’t trust people easily.”

Rodney dropped his head before looking up at her with sad eyes, “I thought she needed a few days. So I didn’t try to find her. After a week I called Andrea, her mother, who told me she’d gone. For the next few months I called once a week every week until I just couldn’t hear Andrea apologise to me anymore.” He sighed, “It’s strange, seeing her again and knowing she’s happy with her new family when I’m still single and trying to work out how to be a father to our daughter from another universe.”

“Rodney, Lissa thinks the world of you,” Laura assured him, “The two of you have an incredible relationship. If this woman can’t handle the miracle you’ve been granted then she doesn’t deserve it.”

Rodney stared at her, the word miracle echoing in his mind then he reached out and hugged a stunned Laura before disappearing.

*********************************************

Ali decided to go to the evening’s entertainment hoping to get her mind off the revelation that the daughter she lost was somehow alive and well in the city. Her evaluation would start in earnest tomorrow when she had to see how good these people were at the jobs they were being paid to do but tonight she thought it’d be good to see them enjoying themselves.

A shrill whistle cut through the noise of the room and the conversations died to nothing all eyes turning to the strawberry-blonde sitting at the small table between the two teams.

“Okay,” the woman called, “You all know the rules and you all know the teams. So, we’ll start with round one – Movies.”


Laura grinned as the crowd cheered on the team they’d chosen. She could see Alisa and Rodney on one side of the room with JD and John while on the other side she could see the IOA representative Alisa Patterson.

Laura had an almost irresistible urge to go over to the woman and smack her around the head for hurting Rodney so much as well as upsetting Lissa. She managed to push it down and instead she started the next round of the quiz with the now famous, or more accurately infamous, Rodney Round. He’d offered to write a round for the quiz after a mission had put her in the infirmary during the early years; the questions had ranged from physics to old movies and had been so difficult that Carson and Laura asked him to contribute a round for each quiz.

It was the most hated round of the quiz and in many ways the most interesting. There were a few people that had once thought that Radek had an insight into the questions Rodney posed but after watching him struggle through several of the rounds they knew he had no inside knowledge.

“Alright,” Laura called over the cheers and calls at the end of the round, “We’ll be taking a fifteen minute break now.”

As the crowd dispersed for bathroom breaks and to get more snacks Laura headed to the McKay clan and sat beside them.

“How’re you guys doing?”

Alisa shrugged, “Fine.”

Laura glanced over to where Alisa Patterson sat, “Really? You don’t have to tell me just now but I’m available for you to talk to whenever you need.”

Alisa smiled at her friend, “I know.”

Laura reached out and slipped her hand into Rodney’s, “That includes you, McKay.”

“Tempting offer as always,” he shot back but the squeeze of her hand made her smile.


Laura walked slowly through the corridors of Atlantis heading to find the younger Dr McKay. She’s noticed Alisa watching her ‘mother’ for a lot of the night and was worried about her. Once the quiz had finished, Radek’s team victorious and through the final, Alisa had disappeared claiming the need for sleep. Laura decided to check this claim and was heading towards the lab Alisa worked in.

“I don’t need a babysitter,” Alisa said leaning against a wall as Laura turned the corner.

“How about a friend?”

Alisa chuckled, “Laura, I’m fine. I am.”

Laura gave her a frown, “Considering everything that’s happened?”

Alisa gave her friend a quick hug, “Goodnight, Laura.”

Laura let out a long sigh as the young scientist disappeared, the McKay clan could be so stubborn and closed-mouth when they wanted to be.


Ali had enjoyed the quiz night, enjoyed getting to see the social aspect of the city before she had to delve into their work. The most awkward part of the night had to be seeing Rodney sitting with the young woman she was being told was really her daughter. Ali loved her sons, she truly did but she did wish sometimes...

Ali shook herself, she’d decided a long time ago that there was no point in dwelling on the past and she’d long since come to terms with the losses in her life. She wasn’t letting Rodney make her feel guilty for something she’d done when she was just a kid.

She had a job to do here and she wasn’t going to let this get in her way so she could finish this then go home to her family.

“I guess this kind of sucks for you,” the most surprising voice made Ali turn where she saw Alisa standing at the corner watching her.

“What?” Ali asked confused and still unbalanced at this young woman who was almost her double except she had Rodney’s eyes.

“The fact that Dad is expecting you to be perfectly fine with my existence,” Alisa smiled slightly, “Its not exactly fair.”

Ali continued to stare at her trying to find something to say.

“I don’t bite,” Alisa chuckled, “Well not since I was three anyway.”

“This...” Ali started shaking her head, “This is just so confusing. Alisa, I want to be able to talk to you and I want to be okay with this but I lost my baby over twenty years ago.”

“I understand,” Alisa replied softly, “My mother died about five hours after I was born, I never met her. I only had pictures, my father’s stories and a video message on my sixteenth birthday.”

Ali let out a long breath, “I remember that. The fear that I’d never get to see my baby, I actually rerecorded it every month.”

“I can tell you that when I saw it I finally felt close to you...to her,” Alisa said, “I’m not expecting anything from you. But you’re going to be here for a while and we’ll probably run into each other because as big as this place is, it’s not that big.”

Ali nodded, “I should go. I’ve got a lot to do tomorrow. Goodnight, Alisa.”

“Goodnight.”

*********************************************

“What is with you?” Alisa snapped as she and JD ran for the Gate, “Everywhere you go people try to kill us.”

JD grabbed her arm and yanked her behind a rock, “What about you? You said yourself bad things happened when you go offworld.”

He snuck a look out over the boulder and watched the natives as they started to look around searching for them. As Alisa was about to look out JD pushed her back down, his eyes telling her that she was to stay put.

“Okay,” he whispered, JD grabbed his radio, “Cadman, where are you?”

“We’re at the Gate,” Laura replied, “Are you two okay?”

“Yeah,” JD replied shortly, “I want you and Ballard in position ready to open the Gate the moment you see us. The natives seem to have gone but I’m not counting on it.”

“We’ll be waiting,” Laura told him.

JD turned to Alisa, “When I say run, you get back to the Gate. I will be right behind you, do not look back.”

Alisa nodded.

JD moved again, taking a few steps out from their hiding place he could almost feel the natives nearby. He looked back to where Alisa was crouched behind the boulder, her blue eyes fixed on him waiting for his order to go.

“Run,” JD ordered.

He watched the blonde scramble out of her hiding place; he waited for a ten count to ensure she was safe before he followed on. Relief filled him as he saw the flicker of the wormhole in front of him then he saw the hulking figure of Ray catching Alisa and shoving her through the Gate.

“Colonel,” Cadman shouted suddenly, “Run.”

JD groaned as he glanced back to see several men running after him, spears in hand. Running to the Gate he yelled at them to go through before he dived and slammed into the floor.


Alisa staggered as Ray shoved her through the Gate, the moment she regained her balance she spun waiting for her team to come through.

Laura came next, she moved to one side waiting giving Alisa a quick nod before turning her attention back when Ray appeared. JD came flying out the wormhole and let out a grunt of pain as he slammed into the ground.

“Are you okay?” Alisa asked moving to him, “Oh my God, you’re bleeding.”

JD rolled onto his back, his hand slowly moving up to his shoulder that had blood streaming from it, “I think one of them got me.”

Alisa was pulled back by the medical team as they converged on JD; she turned and spotted Ali watching them. Looked like she was evaluating the medical team, Alisa mused.

“Dr McKay,” Keller’s voice cut into her thoughts, “You need to come to the infirmary as well.”

“Just coming,” Alisa said following the medical team out with Ray and Laura.


The infirmary was in disarray when the team arrived, Ali’s evaluation was obviously causing a lot of trouble.

“Fun day?” Alisa asked Jennifer as the doctor took her blood.

“You could say that,” Jennifer replied wryly, a little surprised as they didn’t talk much even during the pre and post mission medicals.

“The IOA are basically doing this to annoy us,” Alisa reminded her, “Don’t rise to the bait, from what I knew of Carson and the way he ran this place there’s nothing wrong with what you do.”

Jennifer stared at her in surprise; this had to be the nicest thing Alisa had ever said to her.

“Am I done?” the young scientist asked.

“Of course,” Jennifer nodded, “Colonel Tyler is making a fuss so maybe you could go rescue Marissa from him.”

Alisa jumped off the bed, “No problem.”

Shaking her head Jennifer finished up her notes before moving on to her next job.


Alisa chuckled as she heard JD trying to cajole the nurse into letting him out of the infirmary; he trailed off as he saw Alisa standing at the end of his bed.

“How’s the arm?” she asked with an amused grin on her face as the nurse gave her a grateful look before sneaking away.

“It’s fine,” JD said grumpily, “How’s yours?”

Alisa chuckled and pulled a chair over beside his bed, “I wasn’t the one almost skewered.”

He glared at the young woman sitting beside him, “You’re worse than Daniel sometimes, you know that?”

“I’ll email him and let him know,” Alisa smirked, “I’m sure he’ll be pleased to know his lessons have been paying off.”

JD narrowed his eyes at her trying to work out if she was joking or not. He gave up and dropped back onto his pillow.

“Doc,” JD yelled the moment he saw Jennifer appear, “Let me out of here.”

“Colonel Tyler,” Jennifer sighed, “Please, get out of my infirmary.”

JD bounced up and had Alisa’s arm pulling her out of the room as fast as possible before Jennifer finished her sentence.

*********************************************

Alisa knocked on the door to Woolsey’s office; he looked up and motioned her to come in finishing his email as she took her seat.

“How’s Colonel Tyler?” he asked as he closed his laptop.

“Annoying,” Alisa chuckled, “He’s been bitching for the past hour that he’s stuck on the city, he keeps forgetting we’re all grounded with him out.”

“Dr Keller has noted he will be back on the rotation by next week,” Woolsey chuckled, “His injury is not that severe.”

Alisa shrugged, “I think he’s enjoying himself. But I’m assuming he’s not the reason you called me here.”

Woolsey took a deep breath, “I’m afraid I’ve had to remove you from the off world team.”

“What?!”

Woolsey sighed, “I’m sorry, Alisa.”

“I don’t understand,” she said with a grimace, “As far as I can tell I’m doing pretty good. Okay, the last mission wasn’t exactly the best but...”

“Alisa,” he cut her off, “This isn’t my decision.”

Realisation hit the young woman; she surged out of her seat and out of the office before he could say another word. He hit his radio, “Colonel Sheppard, Dr McKay, we may have a problem.”


Alisa marched through the corridors, wishing she could somehow slam a door open but the one thing this city she loved didn’t have was slammable doors.

“You bitch.”

Ali looked up from her computer as the angry young scientist appeared before her.

“I know you’re not happy right now, Alisa,” Ali noted, “But I feel and the IOA oversight committee agree that you’re too young to be going on missions.”

“And this is your professional, unbiased opinion?”

At the sarcasm Ali closed the laptop lid and folded her hands on the desk, “Dr McKay, you signed an agreement when you came to Atlantis that you would abide by the decisions made by the IOA.”

“It’s not like I had a choice,” Alisa snapped, “You don’t know me, you don’t know my abilities and you’re arbitrarily deciding that I can’t do a job I’ve been training for since I was fifteen.”

“Alisa, my job is to make sure that Atlantis is both efficient and the people here are safe. My opinion is that you should be working in a laboratory environment until such time as you have been given the proper training.”

“Wow,” Alisa shook her head, “For someone whose first word was ‘No’ when they found out who I was this is incredibly parental. And you have no right to do that.”

“I have as much right as Rodney does,” Ali shot back surging to her feet suddenly very angry, “I’m not your mother and he’s not your father.”

Before Alisa could reply Rodney and John appeared, John moved the younger McKay out of the room while Rodney stood blocking their view of one another.


Rodney listened to John talking Alisa down as he moved her from the room. He simply stood watching Ali as she sat back down trying to compose herself.

“You have no right to tell her I’m not her father,” Rodney said coldly.

“I hate to tell you this,” Ali replied just as coldly, “But you’re not. And she’s making do because she can’t go back home.”

“If that’s what you think...”

Ali cut him off, “Do you know how many times she said it when talking with the IOA therapist she saw? Almost every session for the first eight months.”

Rodney stared at her angrily, “I thought you had no idea who she was?”

“I was sent the information this morning,” Ali told him, “It included all the records I needed.”

Anger filled him, “She was scared, she was alone and I let that happen. So I wasn’t her father then but I am now.”

Rodney forced himself to walk out of the room. He wasn’t going to keep fighting with her, especially not over this.

*********************************************

Laura stood at the door of the lab with John both were watching the youngest McKay sitting with her head in her hands. She’d not moved in ten minutes and neither were precisely sure how to deal with this.

“Is she okay?” Rodney appeared.

“She needs you,” Laura said, squeezing his hand letting him know she was there if he needed to talk.

He gave her a soft nod before walking in to sit beside Alisa. Rodney sat there not sure what to do, not knowing how to comfort her.

“I’m being stupid,” Alisa whispered suddenly though she didn’t look up, “But she just sort of hit home that I don’t belong here.”

Rodney reached out and made her look up at him, “You do. Lissa, I am a lot of things and I would never have said paternal was one of them but every time I look at you...” he wiped away the tear that was trailing along her cheek, “I wish I knew what to say or do to help but I’m not very good at this.”

“I know I don’t belong here,” Alisa whispered, “I know I’ve sort of forced you into acting like him but you’re not. I know this but I so needed to pretend.”

“Lissa,” Rodney stopped her, “I know I can’t be the same man who raised you but I’m trying to be your father because I want to be. If I didn’t...ask them,” he nodded to where Laura and John stood, “I wouldn’t have said to Woolsey for you to come here.”

Rodney pulled her to him, hugging her tightly.

“You’re my miracle,” Rodney whispered resting his cheek against her hair, holding her close, “And I’m keeping you. Okay?”

Alisa nodded slightly but didn’t move as Rodney held onto her.


Laura had been to every ‘hiding’ place Rodney had ever used and still not found him. She was getting a little worried now. She and Sheppard had left father and daughter alone for a while to talk, Laura had caught sight of the two McKay’s heading towards Alisa’s room as she was going to the gym for a sparring match with Teyla.

Now Alisa was getting some sleep and Rodney had disappeared. As Laura wandered near Alisa’s lab she was surprised to find Rodney standing on the balcony leaning on the rail. She quickly radioed Sheppard to let him know he could call off his hunt.

“Hey,” she said softly as she moved to join him, “I was wondering where you were.”

Rodney glanced round at her and shrugged, “Needed some air.”

Laura smiled softly and slid down the wall to sit waiting until he was ready to sit with her. After five minutes of simply staring at the stars Rodney moved and took the seat at her side.

“Lissa is doing okay,” he told her, “I think she’s a little shaken at the moment.”

Laura smiled, “I know she’ll be fine. I’m actually worried about you just now.”

“I’m fine,” Rodney said.

“Really?”

Rodney frowned at her disbelieving voice.

“Colonel Sheppard told me what Patterson said to you,” Laura told him, “And personally I’d really like to dropkick her through the Stargate to that planet with the dino-tiger things.”

Rodney let out a chuckle before nudging Laura with his shoulder, he knew she wanted him to talk to her and, despite the fact that even a few months ago he would never even consider opening up to Laura Cadman, Rodney felt he could talk to her.

“When Lis left me I felt like I had to have done something to make her leave,” Rodney said finally, “We knew she was ill but Lis was like Lissa, very strong-willed. She decided to have her baby; she decided that nothing was going to stop her having the child I talked to every night.”

“What actually happened?”

“An idiot smashed into the car she was in,” Rodney rubbed his eyes, “I just remember getting a call and somehow managing to get to the hospital. When I was there the doctor was talking at me and the only thing I could really take in was our baby was gone.”

Laura slid her hand into his encouraging him to continue.

“I was being asked question and after question that I tried to answer, then when they said they could start treating her I said yes,” Rodney closed his eyes, “I think she blamed me because I was supposed to pick her up and I told them to start her treatment.”

“You are brilliant, Rodney but you’re not able to see the future,” Laura reminded him.

Rodney squeezed her hand, “I always considered Lis the love of my life and I always felt I couldn’t have been good enough if I lost her. I guess it’s one of the reasons every other relationship I’ve been in has failed.”

Laura moved and knelt so she was looking at him, “I’m beginning to understand you better,” Laura rested her hand on his cheek, “You are an annoying, arrogant pain in the ass.”

“What’s your point?” Rodney demanded looking annoyed.

Laura chuckled, “You’re also one of the sweetest, most loyal, most unusual friends I’ve ever had. She didn’t deserve you, Rodney and you deserve so much more than that.”

Laura moved and hugged him tightly feeling him hug her back.

*********************************************

Two weeks passed and Ali’s review of Atlantis was now over. Most of her recommendations concerned the aspects of life in Atlantis that the IOA were most focussed on, equipment costs, food and support staff. Finally it was time for her to leave and to her surprise both Alisa and Rodney were standing watching from the Control Room.

“Mrs Patterson,” Woolsey nodded to her, “I’ve gone over your recommendations and agree with all but one. And you already know which that is.”

“The IOA agree with me however,” Ali replied sharply, “And will be making sure that you don’t decide to simply ignore it.”

Woolsey grimaced, “They do however also agree that Dr Alisa McKay will be allowed to join teams on planets that have already been visited and deemed safe.”

Ali glanced up to the young woman in question who was simply staring down at them blankly.

“She’s too young to be going to such dangerous places,” Ali stated.

Woolsey motioned for the Gate to be dialled and moved Ali towards it, “Alisa McKay is a genius exactly like her father. She’s been trained by Ronon to defend herself. You don’t know her.”

Ali frowned, “I will be making sure.”

Woolsey nodded, “I don’t doubt it.”

As the Gate burst open Ali started forward, she took one last look up at the life she never had before stepping through.


Alisa watched as Ali walked through the Stargate, in all the dreams and fantasies she’d had about meeting her mother it was nothing like this.

She’d lost that image of the wonderful woman her father had told her stories about all her life and she’d now also lost going off world with her team, something she felt she’d worked so hard for.

“You okay?”

Looking up to where her father stood, and he was her father no matter what anyone said, Alisa shrugged, “I am. You should never meet your ‘heroes’. They always disappoint.”

Rodney chuckled and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, “Come on, Lorne’s team brought back something interesting. Why don’t we go have a look?”

Alisa nodded and allowed him to move her out of the Control Room as she tried not to think of the woman she wished had accepted her.
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