Sacrosanct
Sacrosanct
by Annika
TITLE: Sacrosanct
AUTHOR: Annika
EMAIL: annika_rj@yahoo.com
CATEGORY: Thoughts
PAIRING: Sam/Jack
SPOILERS: Upgrades, Divide and Conquer
SEASON / SEQUEL: any; Sort of a sequel to "Faux Pas"
RATING: G
CONTENT WARNINGS: none
SUMMARY: Sam gets the chance to think about her feelings and frustrations.
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
Sam Carter closed her eyes and curled up in her cold sleeping bag. She hurt all over and her bruised face burned like hell, but she wasn't going to tell Jack about it. 'I don't want him to make decisions that might slow us down' she thought then closed her eyes . The Guards were somewhere near. She could feel them.
There was a noise, and she heard Jack sitting up to the right of her right. He was walking around the camp, silently, with his gun ready. Not that it would help him much if the 15 Guards they saw popped up. She thought about going with him to check if there was anything to worry about, but she remembered his order not to move from that sleeping bag till morning. It wasn't so much the order that made her stay put, but the knowledge that he would most probably argue with her and send her back. 'Better stay put!'
The noise went away, and Jack sat back next to his tree trunk. She couldn't see him with her back turned and her eyes closed, but she felt his eyes on her face. He probably thought she was sleeping. She closed her eyes tighter. 'I am not leaving you behind! I won't go!' he called out for the thousand time from behind the force field. His dark eyes were filled with tears, his face grimaced. He picked the bar again and started pounding the wall even harder than before. 'Colonel... please go... sir... go... move!' she could feel her own tears running down her cheeks, salty and warm, heart beating rapidly. Was it because of the knowledge of imminent death, or because of his refusal to leave... Was he telling her something only she could hear? 'Jack... please, go...' They took him down the corridor... they were all around him. 'Jack... what are you doing... Jack... don't ... please... don't.....nooooooooooo...' it was all blurry around her... he was everywhere... around her, far, close, near and nowhere... stepping through the Gate, out of it, smiling, crying... 'I'd have rather died myself .... ' 'Sir... please go... now... there's no time...'... 'than lose Carter... Because I care about her... a lot more than I'm supposed to...I'm supposed to.... supposed to...'
She woke up to his hand touching her face, and turned. He jerked back, then regaining control he moved slowly back to his tree. She could her him. She smiled... he was so cute in trying to hide what he felt. Even though she knew... 'What do "I" feel? Do I feel anything at all? Anything at all aside the urge to hold him closely. Nothing more that that... just hug him and tell him how much grateful she was he was there. And just stay there for a while. Safe and protected... But it will never happen. 'Not in this lifetime!'
'Maybe I should go' she thought ' ask for a transfer.' But she knew it wouldn't work out like that. She will think about him all the time no matter where she was, she knew as much. She will be worrying just the same, every day of her life. 'I won't even be able to protect him like he protects me.
Better stay!' she decided not even knowing how the thought of leaving could even cross her mind. At least now she could see him everyday, look him in the eyes, smile to him, and make sure he remained in one piece. And maybe, just maybe, from time to time, not too often, take his hand into hers.
***END***
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