Forever
Forever
by Pagemaster
TITLE: Forever
AUTHOR: Pagemaster
EMAIL: crazysexycool@c4.com
CATEGORY: Sam/Jack, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Missing Scene/Epilogue, POV, Romance
SPOILERS: Shades of Grey
SEASON / SEQUEL: 3
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS: male/female relationship
SUMMARY: What if Sam went to see Jack in Shades of Grey instead of Daniel? Jack's thoughts
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: I've never actually seen Shades of grey, I've only read the fanfic. I wrote this when I couldn't sleep one night. I wanted Jack to die, but I thought a little about the human spirit and decided that everybody needs a happy ending. It's inspired by the new Backstreet Boys song , shape of my heart. For lyrics go to http://www.envy.nu/ktbspa/ Don't forget about FEEDBACK.
Please, help me.
It was a silent plea but she had heard me. I heard her footsteps echoing in the room. She crunched broken glass beneath her shoes. A tiny gasp. I could picture her slender finger partly covering her mouth, eyes round with shock.
I'm sorry, Sam.
Her flesh burned against mine. Her hands led me to the sofa. The sofa where we had drunk together and joked with the others. The sofa where I told her I had never trusted her, and that she meant nothing to me.
Don't leave me.
Her gentle fingers dressed the wound on my hand. God. Was it an accident like it appeared, or was it purposeful? I was so intoxicated I didn't know the difference or cared to know. 'Cared to know...' I laughed humourlessly and her head snapped up. Her eyes met mine for only a moment but I saw so much in them. So much fear, so much loneliness. And hope. For what?
What did she see in my eyes, besides a drunken soldier? Did she see a broken man too ashamed of his past to talk about it, too fearful of his future of his future to admit it? Did she see a man mourning for all the losses in his life? Did she see a lost soul searching for something?
"I'm here, don't worry."
How did she know? Her hands were around me, holding me. She said everything was going to be okay. I wanted to believe her so bad. But I had messed up. I had made her cry. I wanted her to understand; I had to protect her.
I didn't feel the tears sliding down my cheeks. I don't know when my body started to shake with pent up emotions. I only felt her presence. I felt her hands brush my tears away. And I saw her tears.
"I forgive you."
I had to protect her but she was here, now, protecting me. She hid me from the madness of this world. She always had. How could I not know what those smiles meant? The soft touches that helped me keep my sanity. Laughter that flowed from her heart. Tears that told of her vulnerability.
"I love you."
I caressed her cheek and stroked her hair. "The regs can't get us here," I smiled faintly at her hesitation. She looked suspicious for an instant, but kissed me in the next. Not passionately and full of lust. Her lips were gentle on mine, and I felt at peace. She was healing me in her own way.
My vision started clouding. Those damn pills. "Could I?" I managed to whisper. I didn't want to let her go. I wanted to touch her, always. "Could I have this kiss forever?"
"Jack?" She was trying to understand what I meant. She was always trying to understand. I didn't want her to try so much. I wanted her to smile. I wanted to remember that smile. I felt myself going limp in her arms. "What did you do Jack?" her voice full of concern. They weren't lethal unless mixed with alcohol. I guess I had too much of both. I guess I had too much of life. I heard her voice miles away, requesting an ambulance at the residence of Colonel O'Neill.
Her hands still held mine. I wanted to tell her I was going to be okay. I didn't know that she would forgive me. I didn't know that she would embrace me again. I didn't think I could feel happiness again. I didn't know I could feel whole again.
Fighting against the unconsciousness was hard. I opened my eyes and looked at her. It was she who gave me that strength to beat the odds again and again.
"I love you, Sam."
She smiled and suddenly I knew that everything was really going to be all right. No matter what had happened in the past, no matter what was happening here and now, our future was fixed. We were going to ride off into the sunset and live in our castle happily ever after. I was going to take care of her, and she, she was finally going to see the shape of my heart.
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