Don't Shoot the Messenger!
Don't Shoot the Messenger!
by Sarah
TITLE: Don't Shoot the Messenger!
AUTHOR: Sarah
EMAIL: bite_me3500@hotmail.com
CATEGORY: Humor, POV, Romance
PAIRING: Sam/Jack
SPOILERS: none
SEASON / SEQUEL: any
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS: angst, male/female relationship
SUMMARY: Whats it like for a airman to deliver messages to all the cranky workers at the SGC? This poor airman just has a rotten day or does he?(Maybe a seuel. Don't know yet)
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
MONEY RECIVED: $000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.00
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is my first finish story EVER put online. I got the ides when I had to deliver a message to my mom after a phone call we got. I came down yelling "Don't Shoot The Messenger!" after giving the message I wanted to say, "Don't KILL the messenger!" But I survived to write this story so have fun!
Another message to deliver. What fun! All I do everyday is deliver this and that. Love notes and war notes. Nothing more but that. I deliver the message to General Hammond and get sent off to find another person to deliver for. I turn the corner and I get ran over by Major Samantha Carter who is in a rush. "Hey! Do you think you could-"
"Mind doing me a favor?" I didn't even get to finish what I was saying! I keep my temper down so I don't get in trouble. "Yes, what would you like?"
"Can you go tell Coronal O'Neill that Teal'c and Daniel are going to meet us at the bar. Oh, tell him that I will need a ride for tonight, too."
"Sure, I can tell Colonel O'Neill that."
"Thanks." Then she's off doing what she does all the time. Work and hang around with her team. I go to Colonel O'Neill's office and knock on the door. "WHAT!" Oh boy. Do I even want to go into the room any more? I must Major Carter wants that message delivered. Maybe I could give it to another poor soul. No, they wouldn't take it. They want to hang on to they're lives as much as they can. I open the door and I sneak a pick into the room. Colonel O'Neill is sitting in his chair, head in hands, pencil in hand, pen in ear, and piles of paper on his desk. I gulp. I see the bright light just before me. My life is about to end. "What do you want!? If it's not important than leave!"
"Um, ah, do you want the message from Major Carter? Sir." I felt sweat on my face. Delivering a message to Colonel Jack O'Neill when he is mad is every airman's worse nightmare that they wake up from in a cold sweat screaming at the top of they're lungs. "Yes, now what is it?" He sounds a little bit calmer.
"Major Carter wants me to tell you that Teal'c and Daniel are going to meet you two at the bar and that she will need a ride for tonight, too." I wipe the sweat away from my eyes. It's not over yet. "Ok, thank you." His voice was bitter and sounded like he wished to take me by the neck and throw me across the room. I was just about to leave when I saw him take out a piece of paper and started to write on it. "Here, that this to Major Carter." I took the note and finally had courage to ask a question that has been on my mind since the first day I got here. "Are you and Major Carter sleeping together, sir?" With that my bright light got brighter and closer. Colonel O'Neill stood lightning fast and came after me with a paperweight. I ran from the room making the wrong turn to Major Carter's lab. As I ran down the halls I stopped and ducked in a spare closet and shut the door. Turning on the light I quickly opened the note and read what was on it.
"Yes, I will drive you to the bar.
I will even dance with you as soon
as we both get drunker than a lab rat.
I will even drive you home (my house)
if you want to.
Maybe Teal'c can drive us.
His driving is scary, but he still can be
our driver tonight. Hehe.
I am laugh so hard that tears are falling from my eyes. I fold up the note again and ran to Major Carter's lab. I knock on the door and open it. I find Colonel O'Neill there sitting on one of the chairs backwards. I see the anger in his eyes as he looks at me. I quickly hand Major Carter the note and run out the door so that I could live another day. I remembered an old saying that said 'Don't shoot the messenger!'I really think it should be'Don't KILL the Messenger!'I walk back to the airmen's lounge to gather up my stuff and go home. I laugh all the way to my car. It sure has been a great day.
I opened the note that the messenger gave me and looked at the decoy note. Then looked on the backside hidden by another piece of paper. I read the note and smile. The half a page note had a poem and some ideas on what to do after we get drunk. I smile at Jack. He put his hand around my neck and pushed my head closer to his. I did so freely and we kiss. Knowing Jack he most likely meant every word on the note about how he loved me and most likely how he would kill every single airman in the building one by one giving each a slow painful death. And on how he would kill that annoying airman who doesn't watch where he's going and asks stupid questions about us. I would hate his death. Watching 'Mr. Roger's Neighborhood' and 'Barney and Friends' all day long till my brain melted didn't sound like fun and would be a horrible, but mean way to die. Yet I liked it cause the man I love wrote it and not me.
If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Sarah
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