Stargate white and the 4 commands, Fairy tale series 1
Stargate white and the 4 commands, Fairy tale series 1
by Sara
TITLE: Stargate white and the 4 commands, Fairy tale series 1
AUTHOR: Sara
EMAIL: sara.london@mcmail.com
CATEGORY: Humour, hint of S/J
SPOILERS: Nope
SEASON / SEQUEL: Gou'ald under the bridge
RATING: G
CONTENT WARNINGS: Nope
SUMMARY: Just a bit of madness with a fairytale and Stargate
STATUS: Completed
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: I hope you all enjoy this so star readin'.
Casting list:
Sam: - Stargate White
Jack: - Prince Startravel
Daniel: - Narrator
Teal'c: - Wicked Stepmother
General Hammond: - Dopey
Doctor Fraiser: - Dippy
Lt. Simmons: - Brainy
Apophis: - Drippy
Mirror: - Cassandra
Jacob: - Huntsman
"One day, long ago..."
"Daniel, it's 'Once apon a time' not one day, long ago!"
"So?"
"The big book of fairy tales says you have to start a story like that!"
"Ok. Once apon a time there lived a young woman called Stargate white?"
"Copyright laws!"
"Right. Anyway, she lived in the land of Woz?"
"Copyright!"
"This just keeps getting better and better! Anyway, her stepmother was jealous of her beauty! Please tell me it's not Teal'c play Stargate White!"
"Actually Daniel, I'm playing Stargate White!"
"SAM?"
"And Teal'c plays the wicked step-mum!"
"Now I've heard everything! Anyway, everyone morning the step-mother would look in her black magic mirror and say,"
"Mirror, mirror on the wall,
Who is the greatest of them all?"
"And the mirror, Cassandra? Right! Anyway, he/she/it? Would reply:"
"You our oh fair queen,"
"But one day, the mirror replied,"
"Although you are fair, I do declare, Stargate white is fairer then thou!"
"This annoyed the queen so she told the huntsman - Jacob Carter? Right, JACK!"
"What?"
"Who wrote this?"
"The script writers!"
"Would you explain why Jacob's gonna kill his daughter?"
"Um...just go with the flow?"
"Right, anyway go away."
"Thanks!"
"Ok, so the huntsman take Stargate white into the forest, much to her annoyance."
"Can I go back yet?"
"No I have to kill you?"
"Excuse me?"
"Sam, the line is, 'Oh please don't kill me!'"
"Fine," (Mockingly) "Oh please don't kill me!"
"Close enough!"
"I cannot do it. Run into the forest, my dear. Do not come back. Your step-mother shall never know you are alive."
"Oh cheers. I mean thank you."
"Ok, anyway she ran into the forest and after a while she found a small cottage. She knocked on the door, and after a while came to the conclusion that no-one was home."
"No!"
"Anyway, she went inside and found 4 little chairs and a table. Each chair had a place mat set in front of it with one knife, one fork, one cup...you get the picture! She went into the other room and found four little beds. She was tired and fell asleep.
"On those things, no thanks!"
"Sam!"
"Fine then!"
"And after about an hour, four little men came home and found her. Stargate white sat up and screamed."
"Aaaaarrrrrrrrggggg...wait a minute, I thought there was going to be 7 of them."
"Budget cuts!"
"Ah!"
"Hello...do...you...speak...English?"
"General Hammond?"
"Shut up!"
"Who are you anyway?"
"I am Dopey. This is Dippy. This is brainy and he is drippy."
"Apophis? Talk about a very cheap budget."
"Sam. Just go along with the story. I still have to convince Jack to give you a wake up ki...just get on with it!"
"I don't trust you. What's Jack got to do?"
"Yeah, what have I got to do?"
"Just get on with it already!"
"It's your line Daniel."
"I knew that! Anyway, Stargate white was allowed to stay at the cottage if she did looked after their home for them. She wasn't allowed to talk to strangers but..."
"Hello Captain Carter."
"Teal'c. You're in disguise. An old woman...not a ballerina! And you're not meant to know my name, duh!"
"Ok. I will attempt to start again. Hello my dear. Would you like to try my delicious apples? I will prove they are fine by taking a bite out of one."
"The woman ate a bit of the apple and handed it to Stargate white. She took a bite out of the apple and..."
"Oh no. I feel ill."
"A little more enthusiasm would've done, but anyway, Stargate white goes into a coma due to the poisonous apple and the old woman turns out to be..."
"Her Step-mother. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Nice laugh Teal'c."
"Thank you."
"Well, s/he goes off, confident that she's dead!
"But I'm not dead!"
"Sam, SHUT UP! And when the 4 commands come home and find her unconscious/dead they lay her in a glass coffin so one day someone may save her. And guess what, the lovely prince Startravel finds her and says."
"I don't care how much you pay me Daniel. I am NOT kissing Sam!"
"ARGH!"
"Calm down Sam!"
"I am NOT kissing Jack!"
"Good. Can't I just do that choking thing and dislodge the apple."
"Ok. But you two are terrible at this acting out a fairy tale thing."
"You do it next then, Daniel."
"Maybe I will, but you do know that doing narrating means I have control over the story. For example, I can make..."
"DON'T YOU DARE DANIEL!"
"Ok. But keep that in mind Jack. But anyway, Prince Startravel comes and says..."
"Why hello, I am travelling far and wide in search of a queen for myself. Why who is this lovely maiden,"
"Awe, how nice!"
"Sam!"
"Ok!"
"Why, who is this lovely maiden? She is lovely. I wish she was my queen."
"We don't know what is wrong with her? Maybe someone doing the Choking action on her will save her life?"
"So Jack does the choking action on Stargate white and she awakens from her slumber."
"(Yawn) Argh! Who are you? No offence."
"None taken. I am the gallant Prince Startravel and I ask for your hand in marriage."
"Sure, though I'm not sure if the rest of me accepts!"
"Sam! I am getting sick of this!"
"Fine. I accept!"
"So Prince Startravel and Stargate white got married and lived happily ever after. Teal'c...I mean the wicked stepmother accidentally eat the poisonous side of the apple and was taken to hospital. She survived and joined the 'formally evil wicked step-mother's' group while the 4 commands sulked for losing their servant before ordering one out of a catalogue. And me, I got the sack for arguing with the characters. I went to Chulak and got turned into a Gou'ald."
THE END
Finished! Now aren't you glad? This is my very first story so please email me back if you like it or if you don't. PLEASE
THANK-YOU!
Email me @ sara.london@mcmail.com
If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Sara
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