It Could Have Been You
It Could Have Been You
by Michelle Birkby
TITLE: It could have been you
AUTHOR: Michelle Birkby
EMAIL: mbirky@hotmail.com
CATEGORY: Sam and Jack
SPOILERS: Matter of Time
SEASON / SEQUEL: Season 2
RATING: U
CONTENT WARNINGS: None
SUMMARY: An SGC officer writes a letter home.
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Part of this story is told by Henry Boyd - the team leader of the SGC team that was killed in this story.
Dearest Charlotte,
I know you'll be here soon. Only two more days, but you know how I hate waiting. I just thought I'd write, as I'm lonely, and I miss you. Plus, I have news. I could tell you in person, but I can't wait. And you know how I love to tell a good story.
Well, I found Jack in the canteen. He was reading, and he jerked his head up when I sid Hi, and tried to hide the book. I caught the title anyway.
"Jack," I said, "this is a high school physics book.".
"Sssh!" he said, checking round to see if anyone had heard me. He leaned in close, and whispered,
"I borrowed it off Cassie. I want to learn something so the next time I talk to Carter, I understand some of what she's saying.".
"You'll be lucky." I said.
"Yeah, well, thought I'd give it a shot.", he said, then he leaned back in his chair, and said, "So, Major Boyd, what can I do for you?" he asked.
"You can congratulate me. I've got my first command." I said, watching his face carefully. Aha, there it was. The little twitch at the corner of his mouth, as he tried to hold back a smile.
"What damn fool recommended you for that?" he kidded. I continued grinning like a fool.
"Same damn fool who's got influence with General Hammond." I said. "Thanks Jack, I appreciate it.".
He finally grinned.
"Well, its no more than you deserve. Just don't tell anyone, or I'll lose my reputation as a cold-hearted bastard. Do you know what team you're on?".
"SG10. And there's a slight problem with that.".
"What kind of problem?".
"Captain Charlotte Lewis.".
He looked confused for a moment, then his face cleared as understanding dawned.
"Ahhh, I see. You and she.....".
"Mmm-hmm. Since Christmas.". I was trying to keep my face serious, but I thought of you, and that long slow, revelatory kiss under the mistletoe, and I couldn't stop grinning.
"Well, we were dancing around each other long before that." I explained, trying to show him how much we belonged together, that our love wasn't just a flash in the pan, but destined to last. "You know, little glances, touching, innuendoes, secret jokes.".
"Yeah, I know." he said, smiling to himself.
"Then, at Christmas, I found myself under the mistletoe, there she was, and the next thing you know....". I was grinning like an idiot, but I couldn't help it. See what you do to me, Charlie? He smiled too, indulgently.
"Yeah, Charlie's a good person." he said. "I remember the time she challenged me to a game of street hockey. I accepted reluctantly, thinking she's so little, so fragile, I'd beat her easily.".
"She whipped your ass, didn't she.".
"Oh Yeah. I should have learned not to underestimate those fragile looking women by now. Carter's taught me that often enough. For such a little person, Charlie's damn aggressive.".
"And smart, and funny and kind and....well, you get the picture. I can't believe how lucky I am. I can't believe that someone like her would want someone like me.".
There was a little flash of understanding in his eyes then, and I thought of what you said, how he cared for Carter, but didn't consider himself good enough for her. You see so much, Charlie.
"Anyway, " I said, "Charlie is in SG10. You see my problem.".
He thought for a moment, sipping his coffee. The he put it down, and said seriously, "I don't see a problem. You're a good man, Hank. Intelligent, committed.
You're a damn good soldier, and so is Captain Lewis. I can't imagine either of you will let you're relationship get in the way of your job. In fact, it might even make a stronger team. Go ahead. Be with your Charlotte. Be happy. Besides," he said, smiling, a little sadly, "who am I to stand in the way of true love?".
Exactly. And now for the real reason I was talking to him. He is my friend Charlotte. I want him to be happy, so I decided to tell him.
"I understand Sir, that Captain Carter was also up for the command. In fact, we were neck and neck. It was your recommendation that got me the job.".
He shifted uncomfortably in his chair, but I continued.
"I don't mean to be pushy Jack...but why? Don't you trust her?".
His head jerked up sharply at that.
"God, no, that's not it! I trust her completely. And she's way smart enough to do the job. As are you. The only deciding factor was who was needed where, and I decided SG1 needed her more. We've got a good working relationship, and I didn't want to upset that. Besides, she's the only person on the base who will put up with me, Daniel and Teal'c all in the same room for longer than an hour.".
I smiled. Typical Jack. Using humour to deflect the true meaning. I understood though. It wasn't just that SG1 needed her. He needed her. So I told him. I know you said not to, but I had to, Charlie.
"Charlie told me something interesting." I said. "She was passing by the General's office and she heard Sam in there. The General was offering her the SG10 post, and she was refusing.".
His eyes opened very wide, and he blinked a couple of times.
"It seems he wanted to make sure that she was happy where she was. You know how he plays father figure to her. Anyway, her exact words were, "I don't want to leave SG1. The Colonel...I mean the team need me. And I need them.".
Then Hammond said, "Actually, I think splitting you two up would be a very big mistake...no matter what the reason.".
You said you weren't sure Sam understood the implication of that last remark, but Jack sure did.
"She didn't say anything." he said, looking down at the table, trying to make sense of what he'd just heard.
"You know, " I said quietly, getting up. "If I turn down the command, because of my relationship with Captain Lewis, Sam would get it.".
"That's not the reason I recommended you. I really do think you deserve the command. When its time for Carter to move on, I won't stand in the way.".
"I know." I said. "I won't turn the job down. And besides, who am I to stand in the way of true love?".
As I left, Captain Carter came in. I could see the way he looked at her, although he quickly covered it up, but I think you're right. He won't ever say a thing. But I could also see she was utterly blind...just like you were. She could have been you Charlotte. She could have been you.
I just heard from General Hammond. We have our first mission in five days time. P3W451. I'm looking forward to it. I want to do well, Charlie. I want to prove to Colonel O'Neill that he made the right choice, even if it wasn't for the reasons he thinks it was. I hope one Christmas, he'll do the same as us, and finally tell her, but I don't think he will. Maybe we should give them a little push?
Goodbye my love. I'll see you soon. And once you're back, I'm never letting you go away again.
Hank.
"Who's this?".
"Henry Boyd. Good officer. Smart. Kinda reminds me of Carter a little.".
I watched his face as he died, second by second, on the screen. I could no longer see Charlotte, but I knew he'd reached out to her at the end. I watched my friend die, helpless in the knowledge that I'd sent him there. But, God forgive me, I couldn't help but think how it could have been different. It could have been Carter dying there, agonisingly slowly, ripped apart in front of my eyes, particle by particle.
It could have been you Carter. It could have been you.
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