Time to Think
Time to Think
by Airam
Summary: Jack falls into a situation and begins to act spontaneously. What does that mean for Sam?
Category: Angst, Drama
Season: Season 7
Pairing: Sam/Pete, Sam/other
Rating: 13+
Warnings: minor language
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 2005-02-04
This is after season seven and after Jack has been brought back to life. Also, General Hammond stayed at the SGC.
Mild language warnings
----
It had been four months since they had defeated Anubis over Antarctica. With the defeat of Anubis had come the unification of the world as knowledge of the Stargate project spread. The defeat of an entire aircraft carrier fleet in the Pacific hadn't escaped the attention of the media. So the President and the Joint Chiefs made the decision to reveal to the country and the whole world what had been going on, without revealing the site of the SGC, before the media started with their wild speculations that would only spread the panic. When people realized how close they had come to complete annihilation or enslavement by an alien race they forgot their petty squabbles with one another. There was a common enemy out there, where they were all potential victims, and it united the world.
For those at the SGC, life went back to normal as much as possible. Their identities were still classified, no one needed for there to be a rush of media at the mountain interfering with their lives and duties. For the first time, the immediate families of SGC personnel were told what it was they did under the mountain. Remarkably enough, word never reached the media. The families were too proud of their loved ones to put them at risk by distracting them from the important duties they performed under the mountain and, in some cases, across the galaxy.
For Pete Shanahan knowing that the biggest threat to the galaxy had been eliminated, there was a sense of relief. And so today he found himself walking into the mall in Colorado Springs.
Twenty minutes later Pete looked up from the counter he was looking into and noticed Colonel Jack O'Neill walking past the store he was in. He had to get another opinion, and so he raced out of the store after Jack. "Colonel!"
Jack stopped and turned around to face the source of the voice he didn't recognize. He wasn't all that delighted to see Pete, but you couldn't tell from his face. He had made a resolution to be happy for Sam, even if it meant she found comfort in another man's arms. "Pete."
"Hey, can I get your help with something?" Pete asked him as he shook his hand and, holding onto it, started leading him back to the store he had previously occupied.
"Uh, actually I was on..."
"Please, I need your help... It's about Sam," he told him pleadingly as he stopped and looked at him.
Jack's interest was now officially piqued, `maybe they broke up?' he wishfully thought to himself. `Wouldn't Sam have told me?'
As Jack continued the discussion in his mind he didn't take note of the store he and Pete were standing in front of. After not getting a response, Pete spoke again, "I want to ask Sam to marry me and I need help picking out the ring!" he quickly blurted out.
Jack's mental monologue ground to a screeching halt as his mouth opened to allow air to enter his shocked body as his eyes went wide. "Wh... You want to marry... Carter?" he finally managed to stumble out hoping that he had misheard the man. Only then did he realize that he was standing in front of a jewelry store.
Oblivious to Jack's reaction, Pete excitedly went on as he dragged Jack into the store, "Yeah! I'm really excited and I want to give her the perfect ring and I'm having a hard time deciding. You've known her for a long time, you ought to know what she likes... So which one do you think?" he asked Jack as he pointed at the three rings that were lying on a soft felt pad in front of the salesman who had been helping him earlier.
Jack's mind was still trying to catch up with what he was hearing as he absently stared down at the three rings.
"So which one do you think she'll like the most? Personally," Pete picked up the ring in the center, "I like this one..."
Jack stared at the ring Pete held in front of him. It was a very intricate and busy setting. In the center was a large round diamond (Jack guessed it was close to two carats) in a white gold setting, surrounded by two slightly smaller sapphires, and then two even smaller diamonds on both sides. He absently looked away and down at the other pair, he then picked up one of the rings. It was a small simple ring with only a small tear-shaped diamond in a yellow gold setting. He admired it as he envisioned slipping it onto Sam's left hand.
Pete looked down at the ring Jack held, "You think she'll like that one?" Pete wasn't sure, it was so small. He wanted to dazzle the woman he loved, how could he do that with a ring that small? "Nah, don't you think she'll like this one better? Look at the size of it!"
As Jack heard Pete's voice he was painfully pulled from his vision. With a blank face he turned and looked at Pete not knowing what to say. Not knowing how to tell this man that he couldn't marry Carter. How to tell him that he loved Carter more than anything in the world, or the galaxy for that matter. `Wait, do I love her? Hell, does she even love me? Or even care for me a little a bit?' "I... uh... I don't know..."
"Come on, you're her CO, you've worked with her for over seven years!" Pete really needed help with this decision, he wanted to get it just right for Sam.
Jack shook his head, "Sorry, I can't help you... It's not exactly something we talk about... Look, Pete, I gotta go." He didn't wait for a response as he ran from the store.
Pete watched him run away confused. He then looked down at the ring that Jack had picked up and considered it. "I gotta go with my gut feeling, I'll take this one!" he told the salesman as he held out the ring that he had initially chosen.
As Jack left the store he picked up his pace as he ran to his car. He started the car and raced out of the mall parking lot not knowing where he was going. His mind raced with questions and memories over his relationship with his 2IC. The fear of losing her to a stalking cop got to be too much at one point as he started to hyperventilate. Luckily, he was passing a park and he pulled into the parking lot and got out of his truck, rapidly breathing in large gulps of air as he paced in front of his truck. He paced around the lot trying to understand how this could be happening... Wondering if he had a shot at all... Was it even worth the risk? Once he'd finally calmed down a bit he walked into the park, again unaware of where exactly he was headed. He walked aimlessly trying to figure out if he had any options. After a half hour of aimlessly walking around the park he looked up and wondered where he was. As he looked around him he saw that he was across the street from Sam's house.
`I'm here for a reason,' he told himself. He took a deep breath before running across the street and up to her door. He banged on the door repeatedly until he got a response. "Carter! Open up!"
A concerned Sam finally opened the door, "Sir?! Is everything all right?"
Jack stared at her, `It's do or die Jack!' "I need to talk to you, can I come in?"
Sam held open the door, "Yeah, of course. Are you all right?"
As Jack led her into the living room he was relieved. He recalled not seeing Pete's car out front and no ring on Sam's finger. And more importantly she wasn't calling him `Sir.' "Yeah... I'm fine... Just been walking around the park for awhile... All of a sudden here I was across the street from your place... Yeah I've just been doing some thinking... Went to the mall earlier... So how are you?"
Sam confusingly stared at him, he was rambling. Not that he didn't ramble a lot, just not like this, and with a hint of nervousness and apprehension. "I'm fine," she slowly answered as she wondered why he was really there. They sat in silence for a few moments, Sam watched her CO and friend but he couldn't bring himself to look at her. Finally she broke the silence, "Can I get you something to drink?"
Jack looked up excitedly, "Yeah! That'd be great!"
Sam warily got up and headed to the kitchen. When she returned she had two bottles of beer in her hands. Jack eagerly accepted the beer and quickly downed it in one chug. Sam stared at him wide-eyed, she was getting more and more worried. "Sir, are you alright?"
"Don't call me sir, not tonight... Look I-"
He was interrupted by the sound of her doorbell ringing. Sam looked down at her watch, "Oh, that must be Pete." She got up and started to head to the door.
Jack chased after her though and frantically reached out for her hand as he stopped her and forced her to look at him. "Sir, I need to get that."
"Not `til you hear me out first!" he quickly uttered.
Sam looked at her CO and then to the door, "I will, let me just let him in," she told him as she started for the door again as the doorbell rang again.
Jack again reached out for her to prevent her from reaching the door. "NO!" he quietly yelled. "I can't let you talk to Pete until you hear what I have to say!"
"What's going on?" she worriedly asked him.
"Carter... Sam... I think I love you! I think I can make you happy! And I know you can make me happy, you have for over seven years already!" Sam's eyes were wide now as she listened to his confession, but she didn't know what to say, she was too overwhelmed and confused. Jack paused to gauge her reaction, but he continued when he heard someone trying to jimmy the lock.
He took both her hands in his, "Look, I know my timing stinks, but I can't lose you. I need you in my life... Maybe it took Pete for me to realize how much I needed you, but I know I can't live without you!" Jack looked at the door as he heard the lock click and the doorknob turning. `It's now or never Jack!' "I won't ask you to sacrifice anything, but will you marry me?"
The door was completely open by then. Pete had heard Jack's last question. Before him stood Jack holding onto Sam's hands with a pleading look on his face. Sam just stared at him confused and shocked. "What the hell!" Pete yelled as he stood in the doorframe.
Sam looked over at Pete, the man who had made her happy the past seven months. The man that she thought she had a real future with. It was a future she had settled for, he was attainable. But holding her hands was the man whom she had dreamed about up until five months ago.
Jack looked at Pete and then at Sam. He brought his hand up to her cheek and brought her face to look upon him again, "Sam, please!"
Pete charged Jack, "You son of a bitch!" He tackled him to the ground and the two started fighting, Pete however had the advantage of being on top, "You knew I was going to ask her to marry me! You selfish, overbearing son of a bitch!"
Sam pulled herself from the shock she felt. When she looked down she saw Pete beating up Jack who was barely defending himself. She then reached down and began pulling Pete off her CO. "Pete stop it! Get off him! PETE!" After struggling for a few minutes and a few hard punches later, she was able to pull Pete off Jack.
She was pushing Pete against a wall as she tried to calm him down. From behind her they heard rustling as Jack pulled himself up off the ground. "Sam, I'm sorry... Please... I need you! Marry me?" he was begging her.
Pete tried to attack him again, but he was held back by Sam this time. "You bastard! Who the hell do you think you are?"
"Pete calm down!" she tried to calm him down, but she was having a hard time. She was so confused right now; she didn't know what she wanted or how she felt.
Pete glared at Jack and then at Sam, "Are you defending him?"
She hesitated, "No, I'm not," she quietly told him.
"Oh my God! You want to say yes!"
Sam held up her hands and placed them on his chest, "No! I can't..."
Behind her, Jack's heart fell.
"You can't or you don't want to?" Pete asked her. She didn't answer him, and the silence killed Pete as his own world fell. "I thought you loved me," he dejectedly asked her.
"I do..." she didn't hesitate her answer this time.
But Pete could sense there was a `but' hanging on at the end of her sentence. "But you love him more?" Once again, silence was his only answer. Pete looked into her eyes and saw the tears forming in her eyes. He closed his eyes and tried to decide what to do. When he opened them he knew what he had to do. Without saying another a word he turned and headed for the door that was still open. He paused in the doorframe and spoke without turning, "Good bye Sam," he sadly and quietly told her as he walked out of her life. As he left her life, Sam's tears raced down her face as she closed her eyes and tried to hold them in.
Jack stood there silently, not knowing what to do next. He had won though, right? He started taking steps to stand behind her, he quietly called out, "Sam?"
She didn't answer him but she felt him stop a step behind her. After a few minutes she quietly spoke, "Why?"
"Because I need you," he replied.
Sam shook her head. When she spoke it was filled with sadness and desperation for what she had lost, "I want you to leave."
Jack's jaw dropped, "What? Sam, no!"
"Yes." She finally turned to face him to show him that she meant her words.
"Why?" he asked her as he tried to place his hands on her shoulders.
Sam shrugged them off, "No, you're being selfish..."
"No Sam, I can make you happy!"
"Can you? How do you know?" she asked him unconvinced that he could provide her with a reason. "We never shared anything real... Pete and I had something, he was making me happy! And you... You took that all away from me!" she yelled at him.
"But I can make you happy!" he told her. He couldn't be losing her, could he?"
"How? Are you going to retire? Or did you want me to retire? Or did you want to try and hide whatever we would have had?"
Jack searched for the right answer to give her, but she was right, he didn't know how he was going to make it work. "I don't know... but I know-"
"No you don't!" Jack stared at her silently. Sam once again shook her head, "Get out of here," she ordered him before turning her back on him and heading for her kitchen.
"Sam!"
"Get out!" she told him under her breath.
Jack stared at her back, he had made a grave error. He had lost her, and his actions had cost her a chance of being happy. When he spoke it was barely audible, "I'm sorry Sam." He then turned and with his head downcast walked out her front door.
Once he was gone Sam broke down as there was no way to stop the storm of tears that escaped her eyes. She leaned against the wall and lowered herself to the ground as she hid her face in her hands. How had it come to this? For almost seven years she had placed her commanding officer on a pedestal with which she compared all men she met. But when she had been alone on the Prometheus suffering from a very bad concussion she had come to a decision. First and foremost was that he was on a pedestal, and he would have to remain there. He was something that she could admire but could never have; he was a sculpture in a museum. She had resigned herself to that fact, and, more importantly, that she deserved to be happy. And then she met Pete. She had compared Pete to HIM. How could she not, the pedestal was always there with a spotlight on it? As she got to know Pete better she realized that he was making her happy, right there and right then. As her feelings for Pete intensified the spotlight that shone down on the pedestal and the figure above it began to dim. She couldn't deny it, there would always be a little light shining down on that pedestal. For six and a half years it had occupied a large space in her heart. A pedestal and figure like his would always leave an imprint wherever it was, and it had made one on her heart. But she had moved on, and she was happy.
And in one night, all that had come to an end. With five little words he had brought her happiness, and the chance of it, all to a crashing halt. "I think I love you..." But did he? Did she even love him back? Sam didn't know the answer to that question. `Can I love something I've never had? He's the piece of art in the museum that I can't touch. Pete's the reprint you buy and take home... Is that what Pete was to me? Was he a reprint? ... No, they were completely different people, Pete loved me and he showed me. And I did care for him deeply... but was it love? God, I don't know! I don't know what to do...' Her desperation turned to anger, `How could he do that to me? He couldn't even offer me anything concrete! Pete could and would have if... if he hadn't shown up... And I would have been happy! Damn him! He stole that from me!'
Her loneliness reappeared as she despairingly raised her head and looked up at nothing, "What am I going to do?" Ten minutes later she had an idea. She ran into her bedroom grabbed a backpack and filled it with a few things. She then raced to her garage and hopped on her bike and raced away from her home. She had a letter to write and a few people to see.
----
The next morning Daniel stormed into Jack's office, "What the hell did you do?!?!"
Daniel didn't know what to expect from Jack, but the look on his face when he looked up wasn't it. He saw a man sitting before him who looked as if he had just lost a part of himself. Jack blankly stared at him before resting his face in his hands, "I screwed up!"
He had never seen his friend like this, and it hurt him to see Jack so dejected. But he had to know what had happened, why Sam had resigned her commission the night before and left. Sure she had stopped by his apartment to say that she was going to be gone for a few days, but she hadn't alluded to anything. Only after learning from General Hammond of Sam's resignation did it dawn on him that she was saying goodbye last night. And it was all his fault. He had to know why one of his closest friends would leave. His attitude softened though as he saw the dejected man before him, he too had lost something apparenty. "What happened Jack?" he gently asked him as he sat down across from him.
"I pushed her away," came the muffled response.
"Jack?"
Jack shook his head in his hands before looking at Daniel. He saw the concern in his best friend's face. He had a right to know why he had chased away their teammate and close friend. "Pete told me he was going to ask Sam to marry him. I got selfish and I rushed over to her place and asked her to marry me..."
"You what?" a disbelieving Daniel asked.
"I asked her to marry me..."
Daniel had known for a long time that there was an attraction between Jack and Sam, he just never thought that either one of them would have the guts to do anything about it as long as they were both still in the Air Force. "What'd she say?" he asked him, knowing that the response he had received wouldn't be good, otherwise they wouldn't be having this conversation.
"She told me to leave... I denied her a chance at being happy with Pete... I couldn't promise her anything... He left her, and then she... she kicked me out..."
"You're an idiot Jack! What did you think she'd say? That she'd drop everything in her life for you?" When he saw the look on his friends face he knew that that was what he had hoped for. "Jack, if you thought she would, you don't really love her... She would never ask that of you..."
Jack looked down again, he knew Daniel was right. "I know, I... I was just so scared of losing her..."
Daniel voiced the question that was racing through Jack's mind, "Yet why didn't she want you?" He paused before answering, "You dropped a bomb shell on her last night... How else could she react when you had no promises or a plan for the two of you to be together..." He stopped and wondered how long it would be before he saw her again, hopefully not long. "Have you talked to her?"
"I can't find her," was the mumbled response.
"Can you blame her?" When Daniel saw the devastation in his friend's face he felt sad for him. Jack hadn't known what he was doing, he was reacting out of passion. Out of a passion for the love he felt for someone that he had never told his true feelings to. As much as he would miss Sam and despise Jack for pushing her away, he would be there for Jack. He had been there for him when Sha're had died. And even though Sam wasn't dead, he knew that Jack nursed a broken heart as a part of him died with her absence from their lives.
----
A year later
Jack was walking through the crowded bar of a popular new Denver restaurant. He was meeting Daniel there for dinner. As he searched for Daniel someone else collided with him, he in turn bumped into someone sitting at the bar. "I'm sorry," he replied before he looked down at the person he had disturbed.
"It's okay," was the response from the woman at the bar without looking up at who had bumped into her, it had been happening all night long.
Jack froze as he looked down at the woman. His mind refused to communicate with any part of his body as he stared at her in open-eyed shock.
Sensing that someone was standing over her, the woman looked up. She too froze when she saw who was standing beside her. They stared at each other in silence as the noise and commotion all around them disappeared. Sam was the first to find her voice, albeit barely, "Hi."
Jack swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat before hoarsely whispering, "Hey."
The stare and silence continued for another few moments before Sam was pulled from her trance when a man came up to her arm, "M amor, venga. La mesa ya est listo."
Sam tore her gaze from Jack to her companion. When she registered who was speaking and what was being said, she got up and grabbed her coat without looking back at Jack who silently watched her movements not knowing what to do. "S, claro..."
As he watched her he knew what he wanted to do. He wanted to grab her and demand where she had been for the past year. He wanted to wrap his arms around her. He wanted to kiss her. But his mind never ordered his body around. Instead he just watched her gather her things and head for the hostess who was waiting for them at the entrance to the bar.
As Sam and her date approached the hostess she stopped and looked back at Jack. His hopes went up in that moment. But as quickly as she had turned to look at him she looked away and turned to her companion, "Vamos de aqu... No quiero comer aqu."
Jack watched as Sam's date reached for her coat and began to slide it on her as he explained to the hostess that they wouldn't be needing their table after all. He continued to stare at the door that Sam had just exited through when Daniel came up behind him, "Jack, come on. I got our table already."
Daniel barely heard Jack, "She was here..."
Daniel looked at Jack and where he was looking at but saw nothing, "Who was?"
"Sam."
----
Two days later Jack pulled up in front of Sam's house. He took a deep breath before getting out of his truck and started down the walkway. He paused again when he was standing in front of her door. Finally he forced his hand to push the doorbell. He waited as patiently as he could, he was in the midst of ringing the doorbell again when the door opened.
"What are you doing here?" was the harsh response.
Jack let out a deep breath, "Hey Cassie." His relationship with Cassie had greatly deteriorated over the past year. She blamed him for pushing Sam away from them. Cassie had been the only one Sam had stayed in touch with while she was gone. But Cassie never told them where she was, but she did provide regular updates to Daniel. "Uh, is Sam here?"
"She told me she saw you the other night..."
"Look Cassie, I know I screwed up a year ago... I've been beating myself up about it for the past year... But I just want to talk to her," he pleaded with her.
"The same way you just wanted to talk to her a year ago?" she accused him.
Her words stung him deeply. "Cass, please..." He was showing all his emotions on his face by now. "I won't hurt her."
Cassie studied Jack for a long time as she debated whether his pleas were genuine. Her voice and demeanor softened only slightly, "She's happy, you know?"
Jack closed his eyes momentarily. When he opened them his eyes were glistening with tears, "That's good... I just want her to be happy... But I need to apologize. Please Cassie, where is she?"
Cassandra relented as she saw that he really did love her. She didn't know if he loved her enough to let her go, but they both needed closure. She hoped she wasn't making a mistake. "She went for a walk in the park, she was heading for the fountain... She went with him..." she quietly added.
"Thank you!" he told her as he turned and ran across the street in search of Sam.
Ten minutes later he found her sitting on a bench in front of the fountain. She was sitting next to the same man from the other night. He walked up behind her and called out, "Sam."
Sam slowly looked over her shoulder, but she didn't respond. Initially she had wanted to say `sir', but she stopped herself. She knew this moment would come.
Jack came around and stood in front of her, "Sam, can I talk to you... alone?"
Sam studied Jack's face before looking across the fountain to come to a decision. She then turned to her companion, "Tengo que hablar con el... Te veo en la casa."
The man sitting next to Sam looked up at Jack and then back to Sam. He stood up and leaned down to place a kiss on her cheek, "Claro, lo que tu quieres. Ciao." He nodded at Jack as he stepped around him and returned to Sam's house.
"Can I sit down?"
"No, let's go for a walk," she told him as she got up and started walking off.
Jack quietly walked beside her. They continued in silence for five minutes before Sam spoke, "So...?"
"Where'd you go?"
"Spain."
"Ahh... I didn't think you spoke Spanish," he lightly added hoping to elicit a smile from Sam.
It didn't work, "I do now."
"Yeah, that's great..." He then looked around the park again, "You look good. Uh, I mean you look happy."
Sam took a sideways glance at her former CO before looking forward again, "I am."
"That's good, I'm glad," he told her. He only hoped that it didn't sound too forced.
"Are you?" she asked him contemptuously as she glared at him. His actions from the year before still haunted her.
Jack didn't answer her, he wanted to tell her he genuinely was, but he couldn't, not yet. He was still shocked that he was now walking beside her. They continued in silence for another few minutes before Jack asked her a question, he had to show her that he was at least trying, "What's his name?"
"Carlos Guerrero."
"Sam, look... About last year..."
"What about it?" she asked him coldly.
"I'm sorry about what I did. I-"
"Are you?" she interjected.
"Yes," he told her honestly. "Please, let me finish first."
She held back her tongue as she sat down at a bench. She looked across the small lake they were sitting in front of, "Okay."
"Thank you... I really am sorry about what I did last year. I had no right to do what I did to you, I ruined your life. I know that now. You were right last year, I was being selfish. All I cared about was not losing you. I didn't know if I could offer you anything, and I knew Pete could... and I was scared to lose you. I've known you for eight years and somewhere in that time I started to have feelings for you. And I hid behind the regulations because I was scared of losing everything good in my life-SG-1, the SGC, our friends. I was afraid to risk anything, so I played it safe. Then when Pete told me he was going to ask you to marry him, I... I was more scared of losing you completely. I didn't care about anything else then, not the SGC, not the regulations, nothing. I had to tell you how I felt. I wasn't thinking then... I didn't think about how you would react, about what you had to lose.
"You had a chance at being happy with Pete and I now know I took that away from you. I don't want you to not be happy. I know that now. While you were gone, I missed you so much. And that was all my doing. I had only myself to blame. I know you're with Carlos, and I have to accept that, because I don't want to lose you again. I want you to be happy, I really do. And I won't lie to you, I wish I was the one that could make you happy. But I'd rather have you in my life as a friend than not have you in my life at all." He paused and waited for any type of response from Sam.
"We were never just friends," she finally told him as she looked into his eyes. She could see his remorse and sincerity. "Do you really mean that?"
"Yes. I know we were never just friends, but I want to now. We have nothing else between us, I'm not your commanding officer anymore. Can we just start over?"
Sam looked away. "I don't know... So what happens now?"
Jack looked down at his hands as he let out an audible sigh. He stood up and faced her, "Let me buy you a cup of coffee so you can tell me what you've been up to the past year?"
Sam looked up and gave him a small smile as she stood up as well, "That'd be nice."
Jack's face lit up, "I missed your smile... So tell me about Spain, why'd you go there?"
"I don't know... I actually went to Germany first. I thought about working there but then I decided I just wanted to live. So I went to Barcelona and learned how to speak Spanish."
"What else did you do? Did you work?"
"Yeah, I taught physics at an American school there."
"Whew! I feel bad for those kids... Can you even teach something as simple as high school physics?"
Sam laughed, "Yes, I can. And they understood everything I taught them, unlike a certain Air Force colonel I know."
He smirked, "Yeah, well you probably weren't explaining astrophysics and wormhole physics!" Jack was enjoying himself, they were teasing each other the way they used to.
Sam nodded, "That's true... It was pretty fun, I made some really great friends."
"That's good... Is that how you met Carlos?"
"Yeah, he taught Spanish there... He's the one who taught me..."
"Cool... So, uh, why'd you come back?"
"Well the school year's over right now and Cassie asked me to come back."
"You planning on staying?" he asked her hopefully.
"I don't know yet. Carlos has thought about going to grad school here. He's in the midst of applying to UC-Denver right now."
"I hope he gets in."
Sam looked over at him shocked, "Really?"
"Well yeah, that means you'll be sticking around. That way we'll get to see you a little more than once a year," he smiled.
"Yeah," she distantly replied. She paused before questioning him, "So, what have you been up to?"
"Ah... not much. A bit of fishing here and there?"
"Is General Hammond giving you a lot of downtime to head to your cabin?" she asked him as she thought of him going to his cabin.
Jack looked down at the ground, "Uh, no."
"Then how have you been able to go fishing?" she asked him.
"I, uh... retired."
Sam was shocked, "What?! When?" She reached her arm out and forced him to look at her.
"Yeah..." He was avoiding explaining any more.
"Come on, when? Why?"
"About a month after you left... To be honest, I was miserable after you left. I couldn't stick around there anymore. It reminded me too much of what I'd lost... Teal'c's still there, and so's Danny."
She slowly nodded her head not knowing what to say.
"Yeah... actually the day I turned in my papers was the day that your dad showed up. He didn't like receiving the letter you left him with General Hammond... Why didn't you tell him why you left?"
Sam shrugged her shoulders. "It wasn't any of his business."
"Are you going to tell him now that you're back? He's been pretty worried about you. He's even come to visit me a few times whenever he's been here... He thought I knew where you were..."
"Look, I'm sorry-"
"Don't be! I understand completely. You had to get away. There's nothing for you to apologize for... Well, maybe to your dad. He's been freaking out! Just promise me you'll talk to him while you're back here!"
Sam nodded her head as she smiled at him, "I will."
----
Two months later Teal'c was finally moving off base, and that weekend he was hosting a housewarming party. All afternoon members of the SGC had been stopping by. Teal'c's closest friends Jack, Daniel, Cassie, and Sam stayed the entire afternoon.
"So where's Carlos?" Daniel asked Sam.
Sam looked down at her watch, "He had some papers to fill out at the university in Denver... he should be here soon."
In a nearby corner, Jack and Cassie were speaking. Jack had been rebuilding his relationship with Cassie all summer and it had been made easier by Sam accepting him as a friend. When Jack overheard Daniel's question his ears perked up and he intently tried to hear Sam's response. Cassie noticed his distraction and slight disappointment at her response. She carefully watched Jack as he watched Sam walk away to try and call Carlos.
"You still love her," Cassie quietly stated to Jack.
Jack, who had been watching Sam's movements across the room, quickly turned his attention back to Cassie, "Huh? ... No... We're j-"
"Just friends?" she mocked him. "No, you still love her."
Jack stared at Cassie before being distracted when he noticed Sam go to the door out of the corner of his eye. He watched as a grinning Sam opened the door and gave Carlos a quick kiss hello before ushering him in.
Cassie watched Jack stare at Sam and shook her head, `He says he doesn't love her! Ha!' She grabbed a hold of his arm and led him out to the balcony where they could speak in semi-private. When they were alone she spoke, "It's killing you to see her with him, isn't it?"
Jack looked down at his feet and didn't reply. Cassie pressed on, "Do you still love her?"
Jack looked up and back into the apartment and at that moment Sam happened to look out onto the balcony and saw him there with Cassie. She flashed him a genuinely happy smile before turning back to Carlos. He remained silent as he continued to watch her.
Cassie leaned over and whispered into his ear, "Do you love her enough to let her love someone else?" She then stepped back and began to re-enter the apartment.
Just before she stepped back inside, he whispered his response, "For now... I know, it's supposed to be me though."
Cassie stopped and looked back at him and stared at him silently for a minute. She then nodded her head once before heading inside.
Jack stayed out on the balcony thinking of the past few months. He loved Sam. He could say that with absolute certainty now, unlike a year ago. He had spent a year thinking about Sam and recalling everything about her that he missed. When Sam had left he had lost his enthusiasm for work. Without her at his side there was nothing to break up the monotony or brighten his day the way one of her smiles or laughs used to.
But he knew he loved her when she gave him a second chance at being friends. Who else but a beautiful soul could forgive him after taking away her chance at happiness? And they were friends now- at least that's how she saw him. Even if she did detect that Jack wished for them to be more than friends, she never let him know. There weren't the lingering stares or occasional discomfort like before. She was a woman who was involved in a relationship and was giving it its proper attention. The tension that had existed between them before was no longer there. She was a changed woman.
When she had been with Pete there was an unresolved tension between them, but not anymore. She knew what she was involved in and she wasn't doing anything to jeopardize that. Jack was her friend, nothing more. Jack knew that that was what she had to do- she had to focus on her relationship with Carlos. But even then, she was still able to let him into her life as a friend. How could one not love a beautiful soul like that one? Jack knew that when he would have his relationship with Sam she would be that loyal to their relationship. And Jack couldn't wait for that day. But he had to show her that he could wait- that he wanted what was best for her. And if right now that meant being with Carlos then he would have to be content with their current relationship. But he could always hope... he would never lose that. And that was another confirmation of his love for her. She had restored hope in a man who had lost so much and given so much of himself.
-----
"Dr. Carter!" Siler cried out from across the room as he entered Teal'c's apartment. He surprised himself when he didn't use her former rank and addressed her accordingly.
Sam looked up and smiled, "Siler! How are you?"
Siler chuckled, "Exhausted! Is there any chance I can convince you to rejoin us and work at the SGC?"
Sam cringed, "Is it that bad?"
"It'd be a lot easier if you were there! The new scientists aren't as good as you were! I've gotten shocked and injured more in the last year than in the first seven years at the SGC!"
Sam laughed, she didn't know how to respond to that. On a certain level she had missed working at the SGC, but she didn't regret the past year. She had found herself and she had lived.
Next to her Carlos looked between the two reunited co-workers. He was shocked, "You worked at Stargate Command?"
Sam's face became serious, "Uh, yeah..."
"Why didn't you ever tell me? This is amazing? What did you do there? You only told me that you worked with the Air Force!"
Sam blushed at the attention she received from her boyfriend, "Not much... a lot of research."
Siler balked, "Ha! I can't even remember how many times you saved the world, and a couple other ones!"
Carlos turned to look at Sam, "Why didn't you ever tell me?"
Sam shrugged her shoulders, "Even though the SGC is public knowledge, they still have to do their jobs. That's all I did, my job."
"If I had saved the world on numerous occasions I would tell everyone I knew!"
Sam merely shrugged her shoulders. She wasn't that kind of person. Besides it was always the team that ended up saving the world- not one person alone.
-----
"Samantha?"
"Yeah?" she looked up from the book she was reading on her couch.
"What are your plans for tomorrow?" Carlos asked her as he sat down at the other end of the couch and placed her feet on his lap as he began to massage them.
"I was going to go shopping with Cassie tomorrow... That feels good," she told him as she closed her eyes and enjoyed the attention that Carlos was showing her feet.
"At what time?"
"I don't know... some time in the afternoon probably... Why?"
Carlos hesitated before answering her question, "I know someone who would like to speak with you..." He continued to rub her feet in the hopes of calming her enough before he told her the real reason.
"Who?" She waited in silence for an answer. After a minute she opened her eyes and looked at Carlos. "Carlos?" she could sense that he was hiding something.
"A friend of a friend..." he was purposely being vague.
But Sam detected it and she wasn't going to let him off the hook so easily, "Who is it?"
He waited again before answering her, "Someone who would like to know about your involvement in the Stargate program... She's my best friend Oscar's cousin... She'd like to write an article on you."
Sam's eyes went wide as she removed her feet from his lap and sat up straight, "What?!" she practically yelled at him.
"She wants to let the world know what you have done as part of the Stargate program. She is working on an article for Time Magazine..." Carlos winced at the glare he was getting from Sam... she was obviously not happy at the turn of events. "Samantha, the whole world wants to know about those who have worked at the SGC."
"And you decided to volunteer me? What were you thinking?" she yelled at him as she got up from the couch and began to pace around her living room.
"That you should receive some credit for saving the world. I am very proud of you and I-"
"I don't care if you are proud of me! What I did at the SGC is classified!"
"But the Stargate is public knowledge," he countered.
"It's existence, yes! But not the details!"
"But you no longer work there, so why not tell the world?"
"What? And try and make a buck off it?" She was mortified at his suggestion. She glared at him, "I will not dishonor the memory of everyone who died at the SGC by selling my story!" How could he think that she would agree to this?
"I did not mean that..." he replied as he got up and walked over to her.
"It sure seemed like it! ... God, I can't believe this... There are hundreds of people who work there and put their lives on the line for Earth... I would never take advantage of the fact that I no longer work there and exploit what I did there! What my duty was!" As she glared at him she was further repulsed by the idea of speaking with a reporter.
Carlos noted how visibly upset she was and tried to calm her down, "I'm sorry Sam. I meant you and your former co-workers no disrespect. I will call Oscar's cousin and cancel the interview."
"You already had an interview set up? How could you do that?" She stared at him before she stormed off to her bedroom and slammed the door shut.
A distraught Carlos stood in the living room as he tried to figure out what to do. After a few minutes he finally called the reporter to cancel the interview. Unfortunately for him, the reporter and media had other ideas.
-----
The next morning Sam woke up early to go for a jog and clear her mind from the night before. She'd been gone for nearly an hour before she headed home... enough time for her to sufficiently clear her mind of the memory from the night before.
She wasn't ready for the sight she saw in front of her house though as she rounded the corner for the street she lived on. In front of her house there was a feeding frenzy of media outlets: TV Network vans, camera crews, photographers, and countless reporters. As soon as she saw them she stopped dead in her tracks. She quickly asked herself what they were doing before she remembered her conversation with Carlos. "He sold me out," she whispered to herself as she saw the betrayal before her eyes.
She continued to stare at the melee in front of her house for several minutes before she turned and started running again. She didn't know where she was going... all she knew was that she had to get away from there.
A few minutes later she ran into a neighborhood coffee shop. She sought out their public payphone and dropped in a quarter. The first time she called there was a busy signal. She was finally able to get through on the third attempt. "What did you do?"
"Sam? Where are you?"
"What did you do Carlos?"
"Nothing..."
"Nothing? What do you mean nothing? There's an entire army of reporters outside my home!"
"They just want to talk to you Sam! They want to put a face to the SGC."
"Well it's not going to be mine!" she told him before she hung up. She looked around the coffee shop as she debated what to do. She didn't have any ID or any cash on her so there wasn't much she could do. All she knew was that she sure as hell wasn't going back home right now. But, where could she go? A minute later she exited the shop and took off at a run... she arrived at her destination thirty minutes later.
-----
When she finally stopped she was out of breath. She waited a few seconds to catch her breath before she rang the doorbell.
"Carter?"
"Can I come in?" she asked him as soon as he had the door open.
Jack was caught off guard- it was only seven in the morning. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes as he held the door open even further to let her in, "Yeah sure... Is everything okay?"
Sam stopped and waited for him to come and stand before her. "No."
Jack could see the pain in her eyes and it hurt him to see it. He hoped though that he wasn't the source of the pain. "What's wrong?"
Sam shook her head as she avoided the question, "Do you mind if I take a shower?"
For the first time, Jack looked down at the clothes she was wearing and he noticed her sweat drenched clothes. He wasn't sure what to say, but he couldn't refuse her anything. "Yeah, of course," he told her as he turned and led her to the bathroom in his bedroom. Sam entered the bathroom and turned and looked at him with grateful eyes. "Do you, uh... want some clothes to change into?" he asked her as he pointed at his closet.
Sam gave him a small smile, "Yeah, that'd be nice."
Jack jumped into action as he retrieved some shorts, sweats, and a T-shirt for her from his dresser and closet. He held them out to her and returned the smile, "Here you go."
"Thanks Jack."
"No problem," he told her with a bashful smile on his face and he beamed when she smiled back at him. "Have you had breakfast yet? No? I'll go make us some."
Thirty minutes later Sam walked into the kitchen and was welcomed with the smell of freshly brewed coffee, bacon, and pancakes. Jack was manning the griddle and didn't notice her walk in behind him and sit down on one of the stools at the counter. Sam studied her own hands as Jack continued to make pancakes. She didn't notice him turn around and face her. He walked over to the coffee machine and poured a mug and refilled his own. He set down the fresh coffee in front of her, "Feel better?"
Sam looked up as she wrapped her hands around the steaming cup of coffee, "Yeah, thanks..." They stared at each other for several moments... neither wanting or knowing how to broach the subject of Sam's presence in his house. "So what's for breakfast?"
Jack smiled before he turned around to retrieve the breakfast, "Bacon and chocolate chip pancakes."
"Hmm," she cried out as he set a plate of pancakes before her and another for himself, "I love chocolate chip pancakes!"
"I know," he chuckled. "Do you want anything else?"
"No this is great! Thanks so much." They ate their breakfast in silence as they occasionally looked up at each other and studied one another.
Jack had cleared the dishes and sat back down across from her. He finally got up the nerve to ask her what was bugging her, "Sam, what's wrong?"
Sam let out a deep sigh before answering him, "Carlos wanted me to speak with a reporter today and now there's an entire an army of them outside of my house."
"What?" he was shocked.
"Yeah, I know... that was my response when Carlos told me he wanted me to speak with a reporter! I mean he had the whole thing lined up already! And then when I got back from my run they were all over the place... How could he think that I would speak with the media? I can't go back there..."
"You know you can stay here... at least until the hype dies down."
She smiled gratefully at his offer before considering his last statement, "What are we going to do about this? The whole world probably knows that I work at the SGC now!"
Jack knitted his eyebrows as he thought about that one. Finally after a few minutes of deep thought, he had an idea. "But do they really know anything? All they know is that Carlos called them up and told them that you worked at the SGC... Maybe there's a way out of this... Does he know you actually served in the Air Force?"
Sam thought about her relationship with him, "I... I don't think I ever told him straight out that I was in the Air Force, I only alluded to working with them..."
"So he probably thinks you were a civilian when you were at the SGC?" he hopefully asked. San slowly nodded her head in response. "We may have a way out of this... Let's call General Hammond," he told her as he walked towards his phone.
"What do you have in mind?" she asked him.
As he began to dial, he explained his idea, "Well right now they only have his word that you worked at the SGC... and you haven't made a comment yet..."
"So?"
Jack held up his hand, "Yes, this is Jack O'Neill, I need to speak with General Hammond." He then turned back to Sam to answer her as he was patched through, "We'll just have to make the world think he's crazy... General Hammond?... No sir, I haven't seen the morning shows but Carter's here right now and she's informed me of the situation... I have an idea though... We'll be there in an hour." Jack hung up the phone and looked at Sam, "He's not very happy right now! I gotta go get showered before we leave," he told her before he turned to head to his shower.
Jack had avoided answering any questions on the way to the base. He had though ventured to ask her one question, "Uh... I don't know how to ask this... But, what's going to happen between you and Carlos?"
Sam looked out the window as she debated the question, she honestly didn't know. "I don't know... I feel betrayed by him..." she told him before they settled back into silence on their drive to the mountain where they had worked side by side for over seven years.
Fifteen minutes later they were in the familiar briefing room of the SGC surrounded by Daniel, Teal'c, Major Davis and General Hammond. When the General walked in he was extremely angry, but he forced himself to calm down before speaking to Sam- he knew she would never go to the media. "Sam do you know how the media found out you worked here at the SGC?"
Sam looked down, "Yes sir. My- Carlos told them. He found out at Teal'c's housewarming party, a couple weeks ago, that I worked at the SGC. His best friends' cousin is a reporter and I guess he let her know... he even had an interview lined up without my permission sir."
Daniel asked the next question, "How did you get out of your house with the media there?"
"I had gone for a run. When I got back I saw them all in front of my house..."
Major Davis was the next to speak, "General this is a nightmare for us. The Pentagon's been fielding calls from the media all morning asking to confirm if Dr. Carter worked at the SGC."
Jack looked up, "Dr. Carter? Did they specifically ask about Dr. Carter?"
They all looked at him unsure where his line of questioning was going, "Yeah... I don't see why that makes a difference."
"They don't know she was in the military! They probably think she worked here as a civilian capacity..."
"And...?" Daniel asked.
"We tell them the truth and make it look like Carlos is making this up. Dr. Samantha Carter never worked with the Air Force at SGC. We wouldn't be lying would we since it was Major Samantha Carter of the Air Force who worked at the SGC! And if Sam stays out of the lime light for the next week and the Pentagon puts this story to rest with the `truth', then this story will become old news in no time."
Everyone looked at each other around the table upon hearing Jack's plan. They all nodded their heads as they considered it. "Jack, when did you become so diplomatic? That's a fine line of semantics you want to use," Daniel told his friend as a grin appeared on his face.
General Hammond was also inclined to agree, "Major Davis, do you think you can pull this off?"
"Yes sir. Of course, it wouldn't hurt if we made the media distrust Carlos a couple of more times. But, yes sir. I think we can get the media to buy it. The statement we make will have to be carefully worded so that the media doesn't pick up on the specific choice of words we are using."
"Dr. Jackson I'd like for you to help Major Davis with the statements he'll be drawing up."
"Yes sir," he told him with a wide grin. "Any chance we can kick him out of the country?"
Sam had a thoughtful look on her face as she considered that, "Well he hasn't gotten his Visa yet..."
Daniel turned to the base commander, "General-"
"I'm already on it," he told them as he walked back into his office to make a few phone calls.
"You know, if we make it seem like he made up this story to stay here the media will turn on him... And if we make him Persona Non Grata, I doubt they'll raise a stink about it."
Daniel and Paul Davis began discussing the wording for the press statements they would release in response to the media frenzy in front of Sam's house. A few minutes later General Hammond returned, "I spoke with the President; he's going to hold up Mr. Guerrero's Visa application for the time being. I notified him of our plan to diffuse the situation and he's on board with it and he'd like you to speak with his press secretary," he told them before starting to leave the conference room. He paused and turned back to the crowd as an afterthought, "Sam, you are more than welcome to stay here on base until this all blows over."
"Thank you sir, but I think I'd rather just hole up with Cassie or stay at a hotel. It won't be long before the media starts watching this place... I should actually get going soon."
"Very well. I'd like to know where I can contact you though while we wait this out. That'll be all everyone," he told them as he returned to his office.
Ten minutes later Jack and Sam were leaving the base, "Are you okay with this?"
Sam looked over at him as she climbed into his truck, "Huh?"
"With us essentially making him out to be a liar and getting him kicked out of the country? We never asked you, but is this okay with you?" he asked her.
Sam knew he was deeply concerned for her and that if she said she wasn't, then they would head back into the base and come up with another idea. She looked away from him and through the windshield and when she spoke it was almost a whisper, "Yeah."
"Are you sure? I know this is going to affect your relationship with Carlos, so if you want to-"
"No. He ended our relationship when he assumed he could go behind my back and set up an interview for me with a reporter."
Jack placed his arm on her shoulder, "Okay, as long as you're sure... Let's get out of here."
The rest of that day Jack and Sam spent in his living room chatting and watching TV. They called Cassie at one point to arrange for Sam to stay with her, however the media had already started to contact her, so that option was out. Sam was starting to call hotels trying to find a place to stay for the next week that wouldn't break her bank, unfortunately she wasn't finding much luck. She was on her fifth phone call when Jack walked up to her and handed her a cup of tea.
"You know you can come up to the cabin with me. I was planning on heading over there tomorrow for a couple days of fishing. They'd never find you there," he offered her. He had been wrestling with the idea of inviting her to the cabin for twenty minutes before deciding that it was what a friend would do. And even though he was excited that it looked like Sam and Carlos were no longer an item, it hurt him to see Sam so distraught at the idea of having her life analyzed by the media. And if she did agree to go with him then he'd have the chance to be there for her... to show her that he cared about her and that he had changed. And he had- he would put her needs before his own desires. He could wait.
"Are you sure you don't mind?"
Jack smiled, "Yeah of course... Just don't say anything to me if you don't catch any fish!"
Sam laughed, "What about if you don't catch any fish?"
"I haven't minded not catching a fish there in ten years!"
Two weeks later Sam and Jack returned from his cabin. The media had dropped the story by then believing the government's statements that Dr. Samantha Carter never worked with the Air Force. Their distrust in Carlos' story began to grow when he had called them back to Sam's house when she had shown up to get some things for her trip to the cabin. They were already gone when the media vans showed up and Carlos had insisted that she was there and that the neighbor could verify seeing Sam that night. But Sam had called her neighbor, and long time friend of her father, before even showing up at her house to ask her a favor. When the reporters asked her if she had seen Sam that night she told them that she hadn't seen her since the night before when she had left on a camping trip, and no, unfortunately, Sam didn't say where she was going and when exactly she would be back.
-----
Two months had passed since the media fiasco and Sam and Jack spent a lot of time together as friends. Sam had taken a job at the Air Force Academy as a professor and Jack had started consulting at the SGC. Sam had done some of that too, but it was an under the table association carried out with Jack O'Neill as the intermediary. As much as he enjoyed just hanging out with Sam, he wanted more and he was just waiting for the right time. He didn't want to pressure her and he wondered if she felt anything for him.
One night they were returning to her house after going to the movies when Sam noticed her answer machine was blinking. She walked over to it and hit the play button.
"Sam, why won't you return my calls? I am sorry for what I did. It was wrong of me to presume that I could make decisions for you. Please forgive me, I still love you Samantha. Please call me."
Sam stared at the answering machine momentarily before heading to the fridge and retrieving a couple of bottles of beer. When she returned, Jack was uncomfortably alternating stares between her and the answering machine. Instead of saying anything she held out a bottle for him and headed into the living room.
They had each taken a few sips from their beers before Jack spoke, "Have you talked with him since he left?"
Sam stared at her fireplace, "Once."
"He still calls?"
"Yeah," she distantly responded.
"What's he want?"
"For me to give him another chance..."
"Oh!" Jack replied as he too now stared at the fireplace and lost himself in his thoughts. `Why won't she? She forgave me... as least that's what she says! What if she really doesn't forgive me for what happened a year and a half ago?' He had to know, "Sam, why won't you forgive him when you forgave me?"
Sam was startled from her thoughts as she turned to look into his eyes, "I don't know."
"Do you really forgive me?" he asked her dreading that she would hesitate in her response.
There was no hesitation, "Yes."
"But why?" he really needed to know why.
She softly looked into his eyes and told him that she didn't want to discuss it. Reading the look in her eyes he dropped the subject. He would have to be content just knowing that she had indeed forgiven him.
A week later Daniel and Teal'c were spending their night off at Sam's with Jack. A few weeks after Sam's return, the members of the former SG-1 had fallen into their old routine of getting together when the team was given time off from the base. Of course, for the first two months Carlos had occasionally been present at those gatherings. But now that he was no longer there, things were back to normal. And considering that Sam and Jack were again consulting for the SGC, Daniel and Teal'c could discuss their current missions and explorations across the galaxy.
Daniel and Teal'c left at a decent hour, claiming that they had a briefing at the base in the morning. Jack decided to stick around for a while and help her clean up. As he helped her, the debate that he had been having with himself all week raged on. He was still having it as Sam followed him to the door to let him out. He pulled open the door and turned around slowly to face her.
Sam had sensed that something was on his mind the past few minutes but she didn't know what, "Jack?"
"Uh..."
"Yes?"
"Uh, would you like to go out to dinner with me tomorrow night?"
Sam wasn't aware of his intentions or hopes... after all she had gotten used to just hanging out with him as friends, "Sure," she casually answered.
Jack realized that she didn't understand what he was asking, "No, I mean I want to take you out to dinner, like a date."
Sam's eyes went wide, "Oh!" She continued to stare at him silently. She didn't know if she was ready.
Seeing the hesitation on her face, Jack ushered out his words, "Look Sam, I know things have been great between us the past few months. And I don't know how you feel about me, but I still care for you more than ever. I want to get to know the person who you are now better. I want to give us a try..." No response from Sam yet, `time to panic' he told himself. "Look, if you don't want to we can continue to being friends. Look, we can pretend I never asked," he chuckled, trying to hide his embarrassment.
Sam watched her former CO and friend squirm under her gaze. "Jack..." she stopped. She didn't know how to tell him what she felt. "If we do this, it has to be from scratch. I'll be honest, I haven't thought of you in that way in a long time. Are you okay with that?"
Jack saw the light and had hope, "Yeah. That's why I think I'm attracted to you more. You're so sure of yourself and you know what you want- I respect that. That's why I want to get to know who you've become even more. I want to know the real Sam."
Sam considered his words. He was sure of himself and she could tell that he meant them. She was amazed that he was okay with her admission of lack of feelings for him. He had been there for her through her entire relationship with Carlos and it's demise, and he apparently knew that she didn't feel the same for him as she once had. But he had stuck around and been a friend to her. He may have wanted more but he never pressured her. And even now after asking her out, he was giving her an out. "Okay then, it's a date, but-"
"We'll take it slow!" Jack ushered out with the excitement of a small child.
Sam couldn't help but smile back at him. "I appreciate that. Not only do you have to get to know the new Sam, but I need to get to know the real Jack."
-----
A month later Sam and Jack's relationship was still blossoming. They had agreed to take things slow and they were... they were learning about each other and didn't want to jeopardize what they had by taking things too fast.
One night they were up on Jack's balcony looking at the stars through his telescope in silence as they sipped their wine. They both enjoyed coming out here and imagining what the people they had met in their travels through the Stargate were doing. Sam was leaning back against Jack when he whispered into her ear, "What are you thinking about?"
"Us," she replied as she let her thoughts wander along those lines more. She ignored his question of what specifically she was thinking about them.
She did care for the man she was leaning against. For the past four months he had been a rock for her... supporting her and letting her live her life as she saw fit- despite what his heart wanted. And in the past month she had discovered a side of Jack O'Neill that she didn't know existed, a side that she was falling in love with. She loved spending time with him, but did she love him?
Her thoughts went back a year and a half, to when he had begged her to marry him. That had been a difficult time for her and she never thought she could forgive him for what he had done that night. But when he had asked her for a chance she had consented and she didn't know exactly know why. But she knew that he meant what he was saying although she didn't know if he could keep his promise of being happy for her even as she was held by another's arms. But he had proven himself with Carlos.
Maybe it was because a part of her could still see the spotlight that shown down on the pedestal where Colonel Jack O'Neill stood.
But the man she was leaning against wasn't Colonel Jack O'Neill. The Jack she leaned against was a different man- a man who wasn't afraid to share his feelings and respect her for who she was. The man she leaned against was alive with life and constantly changing... she had seen it even in the month that they had been dating.
And that's when it hit her!
She did love the man who had his arms wrapped around her.
And in her heart she turned off the spotlight that shone down on the pedestal where one Colonel Jack O'Neill once stood.
Instead she turned around and looked into the eyes behind her. "Why look at a sculpture when I can have the real thing?" she whispered to him as she leaned in for a quick kiss.
"Huh?" he asked her confused over her statement.
"I love you Jack," she told him as she continued to stare into his eyes that mirrored the love she felt for him.
He didn't know what had triggered her revealing her feelings for him but he couldn't be happier as his heart skipped a beat. "I love you too," he told her as he leaned in for a deep passionate kiss.
The end
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