No Words To Say
No Words To Say
by Allison West
TITLE: No Words To Say
AUTHOR: Allison West
EMAIL: awest@pcpostal.com
CATEGORY: Hurt/Comfort
PAIRING: Sam/Jack
SPOILERS: None really, but it is set night after Divide and Conquer
SEASON / SEQUEL: 4
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS: none
SUMMARY: The pain is too much for Sam...
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: It's only a short one so it doesn't require much reading effort. I would really love any feedback from anyone.
DEDICTION: To my three best buddies, J, M and D. You know who you are. =)
She sank down to the floor. The pain was too much. She hadn't even bothered to turn on the lights. The drive home seemed like it had taken forever, just like the day. It had been the longest day of her life. The toughest day of her life. She hadn't felt pain like this since her mother died. Now she sat, in the dark on the cold wooden floor of her bedroom. The tears couldn't fall any more. She had none left in her. Images flashed in her mind. Memories. Not her memories. Someone else's. The memories of Jolinar. She wanted to block them out. She wanted to block them out but she couldn't. Over and over again she saw him. His face, his eyes, his hands, his heart. The long walks, the quiet talks, the joys, the sorrows, the night of passion and the fire of battle. It all melded together into a montage of images. Images of her lover, images of her mate. Images of Martouf. Jolinar was grieving, just as Martouf had grieved when he knew of her death. Now it was her turn. Sam couldn't fight it. She could feel the pain building again, deep inside of her. When was it going to stop.
"Yes Jolinar. I killed him. What do you want me to say?", she yelled to the empty dark room.
She couldn't bear the guilt. It felt like it was claiming her, disabling her. She moved back, leaning against the foot of the bed. Pulling her knees to her chest she buried her face in her lap and sobbed. She had to bear this burden alone. Slipping into a daze, she blocked out the world. She never heard the soft knock at the door, the turning of the handle or the slow footsteps that walked across the living room, searching. Then he saw her, on the floor, her head in her hands. The crying had stopped and she seemed to be totally oblivious to his presence. She was still in the same clothes. She looked tired and sad. He entered the room. He sat down next to her. Sam felt a slight warmth on her left side that jolted her out of her daze. Slowly she turned her head and looked at him. He reached down and took her hand in his. It was cold and clammy. She looked at their hands intertwined. She couldn't bear it any longer. Turning her body towards him, she buried her face in his shoulder. He held her close. He held her safe. Protecting her. In the dark they sat. Neither said a word. Hours passed in silence. Just the closeness and the comfort was all either needed. He felt her breathing slow against his neck. She was sleeping. Away from the pain, away from the tears. He moved his body slowly, picking her up and placing her gently on the bed. He lied down next to her, watching over her. He ran a hand over her cheek, brushing away the soft whispers of blonde hair. She stirred. Her eyes opened slowly and glistening in the pale moonlight emanating from the window. She looked at him. The pain was still there. She looked into his eyes. Rolling on her side with her back to him, she nestled down into his chest. Taking his hand she draped it over her shoulder so that he held her tight. He did as she asked. Holding her close to him they both fell into a deep slumber. A dream where they could hide from the pain. The pain of one love lost and another one discovered.
The End
"No words to say. No words to convey, this feeling inside I have for you. Deep in my heart. Safe from the Gods of Intellect and Reason. Leaving me at a loss for words to express my feelings."
- Tracy Chapman, "For You"
If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Allison West
Heliopolis Main Archive
A Stargate: SG-1 Fanfiction Site
No Words To Say
by Allison WestSite Navigation
Support Heliopolis