My Computer Loves Coffee
My Computer Loves Coffee
by Chocolate O'Neill's Corporation
TITLE: My Computer Loves Coffee
AUTHOR: Chocolate O'Neill's Corporation
EMAIL: Floe:Spacemonkey@freesurf.chand Jay: jay.sgshipper@cableinet.co.uk
CATEGORY: S/J, D/J,G/T
SPOILERS: The Broca Divide quick reference, not much actually
SEASON/SEQUEL INFO: None
RATING: PG-13
WARNINGS: Adult References
SUMMARY: How would your laptop react to coffee?
STATUS: complete
ARCHIVE: Whoever want this fic, just tell us
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters and places are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret Productions. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary purposes and no infringement on copyrights or trademarks was intended. Previously unrecognised characters and places, and this story, are copyrighted to the
author. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.
AUTHOR NOTE: Jay and I were bored, we decided we would write a fic to fight this. This is a *each a sentence* fic, I don't know if it could explain anything :o) Enjoy!
It was a quiet night at the SGC. Sam was working on her last 'doohickey', a cup of coffee next to her computer. Flicking through the pages of one of her many Physics books, Sam absent-mindedly reached for her coffee cup, accidentally knocking the continence of the cup all over her computer. That's when everything started to go weird.
Startled, Sam rushed toward a tissue box in attempt to save her dear computer, 'a very nice power book G3 bronze (Macintosh)', but wasn't able to prevent the short circuit. Instead of shutting down, the computer started to dial the Internet, connecting itself onto the web and the base security camera as well.
Looking on in awe at the pictures that appeared on the screen of her computer, she watched in silence as she saw herself taking to Janet in the hallway. Alarms started screeching and lights flashed, her conversation with the doctor cut short, as they both began to run down the hall toward the control room.
Sam was shocked to note the date on the monitor as the 1/3/01... she checked the date on her watch, then on the calendar, which both indicated 23/10/00. She checked again and then glanced suspiciously toward the piece of alien technology she was testing, which was now turned on, something she had tried to do and failed for days now without even knowing what this *thing* was created for. Tearing her attention away from the device, she turned her concentration back to her computer. The screen went blank and for a brief second Sam thought she had lost the connection, until another picture reappeared on the screen. The date was now closer to present, 15/11/00, and this was from the locker room camera. She gasped in surprise when she saw a large amount of the male population of the base taking their daily shower. About to turn away something caught Sam eye, Something or to be precise someone entering the room from the shower with only a towel. Hearing footsteps from the corridor she quickly tore her gaze from her barely naked CO.
"Sam, you in here?" a female voice asked from her lab door.
Closing her laptop Sam answered quickly, "yeah Janet I'm here".
"I was wondering where you where. Wow what a mess what happened?" Janet asked looking at Sam coffee covered lab table "and what are you watching?"
"Err... I wasn't watchi..." she was all of a sudden cut of by loud voices originating from her computer, one of them clearly hers.
"C'mon, not here, what are you doing?" Came Sam voice. "Anybody couldn't walk in". moaning and other noises could be heard coming from the device.
Janet looked at the laptop, then at Sam, then back at the laptop. Smirking, Janet asked "what kind of tape are you watching Sam?... Isn't it YOUR voice?"
"Err...." Sam spotted a sparkle in Janet's eyes, "No! No! Janet, you won't open it!", Janet came closer, "No!" Janet came closer still, when Janet was a meter away from the computer, Sam suddenly jumped from her seat, making a dead run in attempt to stop her from watching, but without warning the computer started to open its self up. Sam was quite relieved to find the picture changing; a small boy and girl could be seen walking down one of the corridors.
"Sam" what the hell's going on?" Janet asked a frown wrinkling her brow.
The picture faded quickly, changing into a couple kissing obviously a brunette and someone they knew very well.
"Sam" Janet repeated somewhat distractedly "what's going on here? I swear I never kissed Daniel!"
"I know, I know, look at the date " Sam answered pointing at her laptop". Apparently the machine we brought back from P9S-764 somehow connected up with my laptop and the base's security cameras and is now showing us evens of the future"; Sam finished looking as though she didn't quite believe the story herself.
"Oh my god" Janet replied on automatic pilot "does anyone else know about this? Do you think that's what the machine was built for? Why the hell am I kissing Daniel?" she asked throwing questions at Sam left right and center, most of them question that Sam didn't know the answer to, "And who where *you* talking to? And it sounded to me like you where also having the same kind of.... 'conversation' with *someone* as I was having with Daniel".
"Well", Sam said, a pink flush creeping into her cheeks. "I don't know, it could have been someone else anyone else and...." Suddenly the screen showed the locker room again and Sam pined against her locker by someone the two doctors could have recognized a hundred meters away... and they where obviously making out.
"I might be wrong", Janet said "either this isn't set during the virus incident Sam, or the colonel lied about what *really* happened".
"And what are you two ladies up to?" came the rough voice from the door.
Both Sam and Janet reached out and simultaneously slammed the screen of the laptop firmly down. Turning round they received a very confused look off the very confused colonel.
"Colonel what are you doing here?" Janet asked noticing Sam rather paled complexion.
"Err... we where supposed to meet for lunch 20 minuets ago" he answered glancing at his watch. "So what is it that's got you both so mesmerized that you cant even turn up for a simple lunch with a very hansom colonel and a spacemonkey?" he asked a grin forming on his lips.
"C'mon Carter, tell me" he insisted none of the women before him answering "Doc? Do I have to make it an order?"
*Think fast Sammy think fast* Sam was desperately trying to make up a good excuse.
"Err...we are preparing your birthday present?" Janet supplied not looking very convincing.
"I don't think *your* computer would enter in any way into the conception of *any* present for me. Besides my birthday isnt for another 6 months!" he pointed out "Will ya let me see? Carter?" He turned slowly toward his second in command who hadn't say a word since he entered the lab, which was really unlike her. "Do I have to make it an order?" He asked teasingly, approaching Sam who woke her up from her "trance".
"We were just testing the machine we found on zurton last week" she said moving cautionary between her commanding officer and her laptop "we got caught up into work, let go and grab something to eat now" she finished.
But jack kept on moving toward her.
"Really? Why do I have the feeling your hiding something then? Huh?" he asked smirking as she backed away closer to the computer, troubled by proximity of the man she just saw herself making out with a few second ago. "C'mon" he said as he tried to reach the power book "Let me take a look" He said trying playfully to open the laptop Sam was trying to keep closed, he then grabbed her wrists and pinned Sam between the desk and himself so she couldn't keep him for looking. Janet was trying to grab the colonel from the computer, but the tiny doctor didn't matched up with him in strength. He finally succeeded in opening the computer, the two women letting out a sigh of frustration. "Spacemonkey you dog!" he exclaimed; "Janet, I really didn't think you would keep a video of that to show Sam!" he laughed. His laugh stopped dead when the computer screen changed to a view of the infirmary and an injured Sam laying in bed, jack sitting so close he might of well been in the bed with her, idly playing with the short stands of her hair. Jack stood shocked about to open his mouth he suddenly changed his mind as the colonel O'Neill on the screen bent over and pressed a gentle kiss to the forehead of his second in command.
"Err... I... err... when did this happen?" he finally got out. Looking very embarrassed.
"It hasn't, sir". Sam answered
"Not yet anyway" Janet joined in a smirk pulling at the corners of her mouth.
Ok, is this a big joke? He asked embarrassed, "or is that one of those AU's all over again? Did Danny bring some tapes back and give em to you so you could have a laugh?"
"No colonel its not an AU", Janet answered for the dumb stricken Sam.
"Look in the corner of the screen sir".
"Huh?", jack asked still obviously confused.
"The date, sir. Look at the date." Sam said speaking up and trying to put her embarrassment aside.
"06/04/01 23:00" he read out slowly"....... That would make it a future event? "He asked incredibly, "and *why* were you trying to hide that from..." he stopped talking as the screen switched to a rather hot moment between himself and his 2IC. He looked on in astonishment at the computer, then at Sam, who quickly closed the laptop.
"That would be why" answered Janet, instead of her really flushed friend who was almost shaking.
"We do that?" jack asked his voice oddly strained.
Sam, who was to embarrass to answer just, ran from the room.
"Now look what you did", Janet said accusingly.
"What? I barely said two words to her!" jack said before leaving in an attempt to find Sam.
"Hey, Janet, where did jack just run off to" asked Daniel stepping into the lab.
Janet stared at him a few seconds, then smiling devilishly; she grabbed him, pinned him strongly against the wall and administered the longest kiss he'd ever experienced.
"Wow" was all that he managed to say, trying to regain his balance after she released him
"Ya like?" She asked kinda flushed herself.
"What do ya think?" he answered taking her in another *big* kiss.
Jack searched for Sam all over the mountain. Spotting Simmons in the hallway jack decided to get his attention, if Simmons 'the man who had the biggest crush on Sam and there for knew her every move' didn't know where she was he didn't know who would. "Yo Simmons" jack shouted. " Have you seen Major Carter anywhere I've been looking all over for her".
"Yes, sir" Simmons answered, "I saw her heading towards the parking lot only a couple of minutes ag..." he never got the chance to finish his sentence as jack took off at top speed towards the elevator.
Stepping on to the lot jack immediately spotted Sam ready to climb into her car.
"Carter wait up" jack shouted over the top of the parked cars.
Looking over her shoulder, Sam just simply turned back round and continued to get in her car.
"Sam please" jack said his voice pleading with her to stay.
Slowly she turned around and shut the door, "sir please I'm already embarrassed enough"
Jack could see her face was the brightest color of red, "Sam all I want to do is talk".
"I don't want to talk", Sam said, a pouting tone entering her voice
"Yeah well to tell you the truth neither do I" he answered pulling her tight against himself and giving her the most mind blowing kiss either of the had ever had.
"whaa... Err... You... Err..." Sam stuttered.
He backed away "sorry I shouldn't have, I..." he turned to leave when suddenly, reaching to a decision, Sam grabbed his shirt.
"Where do you think you are going *sir*?" she asked, drawing him to her and kissed him just as passionately as he had a few second ago
"Nowhere" he muttered before kissing her back, leaning her against the car, his hand wondering around her waist, holding her close.
Later on that night
Snuggling into the warm body beside her, Sam let out a contented sigh.
"Sam", jack said hesitating slightly.
"Yeah" came the sleepy reply.
Running his fingers up and down her side he spoke three words she never thought she would here from him "I love you", pressing a small kiss to her shoulder, Sam turned herself around in his arms.
"I love you too" she answered her voice low and husky, feeling his hand wondering on her body. "Ready already? I tough the last time would have get you asleep for days" she said giggling. She crawled to him and kissed him, a kiss leading to another hungry kiss and to the unrepressed demonstration of passion, which lasted the whole night and the following days of downtimes.
EPILOGUE
The next day Sam showed the 'time window' to the general who at first thought it was a magnificent discovery, until he decided to take a sneak peek at it and found himself starring at Teal'c and himself making out in the briefing room. After that incident the 'time window' mysteriously disappeared.
Oh yeah... Sam, jack and Daniel and Janet all lived happily ever after.
And as for Teal'c and General Hammond, well that's another story .
AUTHORS NOTE
We would like to appologize to people who could get chocked by the whole Teal'c and Hammond deal, it is just an attempt at being funny, I dont know if we succeded but we wish that the disturbing mental image it could give won't keep you from sleeping :o)
yours: Flo & Jay
If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Chocolate O'Neill's Corporation:FloeandJay
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