Chapter 2 – Dreams and Reality
SG-1 was finally released from quarantine one week before they were scheduled to return to Earth. Sam and Daniel had spent the time taking care of their friends but had shown no symptoms of the virus; officially called the ‘Bugs Virus.’ Several days after the first signs of infection had cleared, Cam, Vala, and Teal’c were no longer showing the virus in their blood. After several days virus-free, the team was released.
The physicians had started a lively debate about Teal’c’s infection. Tretonin was supposed to prevent any kind of infection, yet Teal’c had still been infected. However, the more surprising side effect was discovered 8-hours later when Teal’c didn’t need his next dose of the medication. He still exhibited the flu-like symptoms, but was missing the initial wave of weakness that precluded the next dose. Teal’c refused the medication until he felt the need for it.
That need never came. Further testing showed that Teal’c had developed a fully functional immune system that was rigorously attacking everything in his system, except the Bugs virus. The physicians scrambled to find out why and how.
Once released however, SG-1 had withdrawn from the rest of the base. They seemed to distance themselves from the others, though the distancing didn’t seem to be intentional. The rest of the base just chalked it up to team dynamics and left them alone.
Sam wasn’t so sure. Sam had felt different since the quarantine. Not bad, if anything, she had never felt better, but definitely off. As she watched the rest of SG-1, she had noticed some subtle changes.
First, the whole team deferred to her, not Cam, for decisions. She didn’t understand why until Cam tried to push a decision she didn’t agree with and she bristled, verbally slapping him down. It was then that she had realized that the team had looked to her to verify all of Cam’s past orders, before executing them. As long as she agreed, they would follow the order. When she didn’t agree, they would try to convince Cam to change his mind. He was the leader in name but not in function.
But since quarantine, the rest of the team wasn’t so subtle about deferring to her. Cam hadn’t tried to lead the team since she gave him a verbal slap, deferring quietly to her. Sam still wasn’t sure why she had reacted the way she had, nor why the others had only watched passively. Sam thought that she should be bothered by their behavior, but just couldn’t muster the need to care. It worked for them, so why fix it.
Second, Daniel and Vala were together constantly. Vala had always tagged along with Daniel, mostly to annoy him. But lately they were joined at the hip. Sam was pretty sure that they had finally resolved their feelings for each other and entered into a relationship. They still argued and badgered each other, but now it was less heated and more affectionate. Sam couldn’t help but feel happy for the pair. Unfortunately, it also illustrated just how alone she was and, for the first time in a long time, she felt the need for companionship. Her friends just weren’t enough any more.
Third, everyone was having some weird dreams. They weren’t bad dreams, just different. Each of them had dreamt of running and hunting in the surrounding hills, but not as themselves. They hunted as a wolf pack. The dreams were actually rather soothing by themselves. But when they had compared notes, they realized that the dreams were exactly the same.
The group was reluctant to bring the dreams to the attention of the Gamma base personnel because of the next subtle change. For no particular reason, they didn’t trust the others. Sam wasn’t sure why exactly she no longer fully trusted the other SGC personnel. The only feeling that she could pin down was that they were not like us. Us…SG-1. So either she was more loyal to SG-1 than before, or less to the SGC.
This change disturbed her the most because it was based on unidentified feelings. She felt that there was more to them then meets the eye, but she could find no logic for the distrust. Ultimately, she trusted her gut. Her gut had led her well in the past. And her gut said to lay low and not reveal the changes to anyone else.
Today, they would return to the SGC. Her team was more than ready to return to the base and resume their fight against the Ori. The break had been good for them. Everyone was well rested and eager to get back to work. Odd changes aside, they were still the people that she had fought beside for years.
Sam gathered the last of her gear and gave the room one last sweep with her eyes. Satisfied that she didn’t forget anything she turned and made her way through the hallway to the Gate room. She spotted her team waiting quietly to one side. She gave them an approving grin and signaled the technician to dial Earth.
Sam stepped the through the gate with a smile. That smile disappeared as she stepped onto the ramp. Light, noise, and smell assaulted her making her wince. She felt her team stop behind her.
“Has it always smelled this bad? I don’t remember it smelling this bad when we left,” Vala asked quietly.
“I don’t either,” Mitchell added.
Sam’s attention was directed to the front as General Landry walked up, “Welcome back, SG-1.”
Sam gave him a curt nod. She didn’t feel the bond that she thought she should. Her gut was still telling her not to trust. “Sir,” she replied to the general.
“It’s good to have you back. And unless you have anything pressing that needs to be reported, I’ll just wait for your written reports on your visit to the Gamma Site. After you clear medical, you are off till Monday. I’ll see you then,” General Landry said as he smiled fondly at them.
“Ah, just one thing, General. Why does it stink in here?” Daniel asked bluntly.
The general’s face scrunched up into a frown as he took a sniff of the air. “I don’t smell anything, Dr. Jackson.”
Sam smirked, “Don’t worry about it, General. We just aren’t used to it anymore. All that fresh air.”
The general’s frown cleared, “Ah, that might be it. But it couldn’t hurt to air the place out for a bit. Thanks for the heads up. Colonel Carter, if I could see you for a few minutes after you clear medical.”
“Of course, Sir,” she replied promptly then led her team to the infirmary. Dr. Lam was waiting for them and seemed genuinely happy that they were back. She promptly pushed them to the exam beds and grilled, Cam, Vala, and Teal’c about the Bugs Virus and its effects. Satisfied that they were suffering no ill effects, she rounded on Daniel and Sam.
Cam and Vala were the first ones cleared, but they waited until the others were released. Cam seemed to be watching the doctor closely as she completed her duties.
Sam became suspicious of the doctor’s actions and watched her closely until Cam cautiously approached the good doctor to quietly ask her if she would like to go to dinner. Her nose confirmed his interest with a flush of pheromones.
When Cam finally noticed her watching, she gave him an approving nod and then left them to work out the details. They would be a good match. They balanced each other.
By the time Teal’c had been cleared, Daniel and Vala had already disappeared into the complex. Sam sent Teal’c off to his quarters and bid Cam and Carolyn good night. Duty done, Sam felt the aching loneliness creep up on her once again.
As she made her way back down to General Landry’s office, she found herself examining all the men around her for suitability as a mate. Several gave her welcoming glances while others filled the air with their desire. But while many were very good to look at, they lacked the inner strength that she felt was necessary. She needed a strong mate and they just weren’t strong enough. Their scent just wasn’t right. They weren’t weak, just not enough, like Cam. She felt like she was measuring them to an impossibly high standard.
Sam knocked confidently on the general’s door.
“Enter.”
“You wanted to see me, Sir,” Sam stated as she stepped inside.
Her gaze quickly took in the whole room searching for danger. She inhaled deeply, trying to find hidden threats. She noted General Landry behind the desk leaning back casually. He was at ease, but his scent was slightly bitter. She frowned slightly. He was sick? No, not sick, unhealthy.
Next, she focused her attention on his guest. General O’Neill was slumped in one of the guest chairs with a huge grin on his face. She was momentarily overwhelmed by his scent, strong and musky with a hint of something else. She almost gave in to her sudden desire to bury her nose in his neck, but pulled herself back at the last minute, “Sirs?”
“Surprise,” Jack said softly throwing his hands in the air, his eyes twinkling with good humor.
Sam couldn’t help but smile at him, “Thank you, Sir.”
General Landry chuckled, “We wanted to let you know that Project White Light is ready. Jack wouldn’t let them launch until you returned. If you want to oversee the launch, it will happen at 0800 tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Sir. I’d like that. I’ll be here,” she replied.
Sam had forgotten about the project during her trip to the Gamma Site. Thanks to the Asgard Core, she had been able to quickly setup the parameters for the small transporter satellites. With the technology ready, the whole project had been put on hold until the Stargate Alliance countries could agree on how to implement the technology.
At the level they were bickering, Sam didn’t think that they would ever come to an agreement. But apparently, they had and now she could finally deploy the project that would make responding to an alien attack so much easier. Her mind was racing through the steps she would take to finally get the project completed.
Sam smiled at both generals, “Is there anything else?”
“No, Colonel. We’ll see you tomorrow,” Landry dismissed her.
She gave them both a polite nod and turned to leave.
“Oh, Carter,” Jack called after her.
She turned back to face him, “Yes, Sir?”
“Welcome home,” he replied gently.
She returned a soft smile, “Thank you, Sir.” She quickly left the room, her mind and body humming, as if his scent alone gave her a contact high. She was half way out of the mountain before she realized who she had been measuring all the other men against. They weren’t strong enough, because they weren’t Jack O’Neill.
Her mind followed that track for a while trying to figure out what about Jack O’Neill was so damn appealing and where she could find someone like him. She avoided finding an answer until she reached home. Walking through the empty lonely house, she decided that maybe she had avoided thinking about Jack for too long. Jack was everything she wanted. He was also a General in her chain-of-command. Her loneliness was the price she was paying for staying away from him. Did she want to continue to pay the price?
She paced the house restlessly in the dark. She decided that like the price of gas, her price was becoming too steep. She no longer cared about her career. She could still protect her people, the planet, without her career. It didn’t matter. But she refused to be alone any longer.
With a course of action decided, she whipped around and froze as an image caught her eye. There bold as brass was a dog in her house.
No, not a dog, wolf.
She cautiously stepped forward. The wolf took a cautious step forward.
Something wasn’t right. She turned her head to get a better look. The wolf copied the action.
Sam gave a surprised yip and sat down. The wolf copied her actions again.
It was a mirror. She was looking at herself. Herself? A wolf? How? Her mind whirled in a storm of thought only to be pushed back as irrelevant.
But she stepped up to the mirror with confidence. She critically examined her new form. Pale grey eyes stared at her. Her ears were alert and up. Her pelt was slick and shiny and full. She was large, but not thick in body and leg. She looked good as a wolf. She decided that she liked it.
She watched as her wolf twin gave her a doggy-smile and started to wag her tail.
Sam spared one moment of worry about the change. Could it be permanent? But she dismissed that notion as not important. She was eager to try out her new form and left the mirror for the front door.
Sam stopped and considered the door. It was locked and she no longer had hands. Her mind quickly ran through options.
Could she change her hand back? Worth a try.
She imagined her paw changing. Her toes elongated to fingers and formed a thumb. She felt a warmth flow through her paw and watched as it slowly formed a hand. It didn’t look quite like a human hand. The fingers were too short, covered in fur, and were tipped by sharp claws. But as she moved her new fingers, she realized that it would work just as well.
So…not permanent…just a shape shifter. Oh well, it’s not the first time.
She hopped up on her hind legs and let her ‘hand’ unlock and open the door. Then she sat back down and willed her hand back into a paw. She didn’t wait to examine the restored paw before sprinting out into the night.
Sam raced through the park and down the streets of Colorado Springs. She was enjoying a type of freedom that she had never imagined before. For the first time, she understood the term ‘feeling the night.’ Scent and sound drew her to every corner of the city. But the novelty of the night soon wore thin.
She picked her way through the tress and finally found herself on a small hill near the entrance to Cheyenne Mountain. She was still alone. This new freedom still didn’t ease her loneliness. It was only delaying it in the thrill of discovery. She eyed the entrance to the mountain with pain. And suddenly, she gave voice all her sorrow and pain. She howled out into the night all her frustrations and loneliness.
Her voice was soon joined by others. Their voices tried to reassure her that she wasn’t alone. She had the pack. But she continued to howl her loneliness. The pack wasn’t enough.
Finally, a shape joined her on the hilltop. She wasn’t’ sure how she knew it was Teal’c, but she did. His wolf form was as imposing as the man, strong and well muscled. And his presence was just as calming. He gently nuzzled her in reassurance, before taking his place to her left, guarding her back.
Her howl changed from anguish to a rally call. She called her pack to her and Teal’c joined his voice with hers. Soon, three more shapes separated from the trees and offered her greetings. Each time, she recognized them. Daniel and Vala showed up together and finally Cam alone. Each offered her the greeting of a pack leader and she welcomed them.
The pack spent some time bonding in their new form, before finally returning to their separate homes. Sam trotted into her house and nosed the door closed behind her. She didn’t give any thought to her new form when she leapt on the bed and curled up to sleep tucking her nose under her tail. Somehow, she just knew that everything was going to be fine.
TBC
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