Uncertain Goodbyes
Uncertain Goodbyes
by Jena Bartley
TITLE: Uncertain Goodbyes
AUTHOR:Jena Bartley
EMAIL: js_bartley@yahoo.com
CATEGORY: Missing scene
SPOILERS: "Family," "Serpent's Song," "Out of Mind."
SEASON / SEQUEL: Takes place in second season.
RATING: G
CONTENT WARNINGS:
SUMMARY: Teal'c says goodbye to Janet before he leaves in Out of Mind
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis, Yum@'s site
DISCLAIMER: All characters and property of Stargate SG-1 belong to MGM, World Gekko Corp., and Double Secret Productions. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.
AUTHOR'S NOTES:
"General Hammond, I hear by respectfully inform you that I must take my leave of the SGC. Therefore, I am no longer under your command."
As he spoke, Teal'c slid off his SG-1 jacket and tossed it at the general's feet. Janet watched silently, her heart growing heavy. Hammond protested, citing security risks, but they both knew there was nothing they could do to change the Jaffa's mind. Knowing that, Teal'c walked passed Hammond and out of the infirmary, head high and shoulders back, every inch the Jaffa warrior he was born to be.
The general turned to Janet, the despair and dying hope in his eyes an echo to her own feelings. He opened his mouth, but closed it, knowing there was nothing he could say. She nodded in understanding. Sighing deeply, he also left the infirmary, his shoulders slightly slumped.
As she turned to head for her office, her eyes fell on the discarded jacket lying in a heap on the floor. Bending down, she picked it up. The crest indicating service in the SGC gazed up at her. Running a finger over it, her thoughts drifted to her missing friends. *Where are you, Sam? Are you and the others still alive?*
Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she laid the jacket on the bed where Teal'c had laid for the past three weeks. Three of the longest weeks she had ever been through. And she had been through some of the most interesting and frightening crises every since being assigned to the Stargate project. Watching, hoping, praying the goa'uld symbiont would be able to heal him. His injuries had been so severe and life threatening, that she'd feared even the larva, with its wondrous healing abilities wouldn't be able to save him. Compelled by emotions she didn't understand or want to understand, she stood vigil over him, rarely leaving his side during those long weeks. As she watched over him, the base held its collective breath. Teal'c was their last hope of finding out what had happened to his teammates.
While she worked to stabilize him, General Hammond sent search teams to the planet. They came back, only to report finding scorched earth and no signs of the rest of SG-1. Knowing how SG-1 had the luck, good or bad, depending on what day it was, to get into unusual situations, he kept the teams searching for longer than standard operating procedure. No traces could be found of Colonel O'Neill, Doctor Jackson or Captain Carter. Then Teal'c woke up with no memory of what happened to his missing friends.
During the long weeks of waiting, watching him sleep, emotions she'd deliberately kept buried, deep inside, started to surface. Emotions she wanted to deny, to turn away from but couldn't. She felt more for this man than simple friendship. Every time she stood next to him, she was vividly aware of how tiny she was and how truly vulnerable she was with him. With his strength, he could easily kill her without trying. But she wasn't intimidated by his size. She had seen the gentleness contained within the warrior too many times. Instead, his size only served to emphasize how very much she was a woman, emphasized her softness in the face of his masculine hardness. How his lips were full and sensual, his shoulders broad and his body in peak physical condition.
She couldn't deny that he drew her to him, not just physically but in so many other ways. The quiet intelligence shining from his deep brown eyes. The way he carried himself, proud and dignified, every motion graceful. How he let his body language convey what he was feeling. A simple tilt of his head, the arch of his eyebrows said more than most people do talking. The code he lived by, loyalty to his friends and teammates, embodied all that was good about the Jaffa and his people. The golden tattoo on his forehead stated his slavery to the Goa'uld Apophis. Instead of accepting his fate as a slave, Teal'c took pride in being Jaffa. He struggled, and still did, to overcome generations of training and teachings that he was there only to serve the gods. He had been made to do horrible things in his service to Apophis but retained his soul. His determination to free his people no matter what the cost to him, emotionally or physically, made her admire him.
Her feelings for him confused her. She knew he still loved his former wife, Drey'ac. Drey'ac only ended the marriage in order to marry his best friend and leave the squalor and hopelessness of the camp. The love between them was still there for everyone to see. And, now, in less than an hour, he was leaving the base, perhaps for good. To search for the missing members of SG-1 and to return to his people. His people were still slaves on Chulak. Teal'c needed to go, not only to find his friends, but to be out there doing something. To stay on at SGC, even on another team, would slowly kill him emotionally. She understood, but couldn't help feeling she was losing more than a friend.
Teal'c paused in the infirmary's doorway. Janet Frasier stood next to the bed he had occupied, his jacket lying in front of her. He could see traces of exhaustion in the slump of her shoulders and the heaviness of her limbs.
~Dr Frasier spent most of the three weeks at your side. I'm convinced that it was her refusal to give up that kept you alive.~
General Hammond's words ran through his mind. She had watched over him for three weeks. When he looked at her for confirmation, she seemed embarrassed, her eyes flicking away from his then back. She was even more flustered when he had bowed his head slightly, acknowledging her actions. Such a small, fragile body to contain so much strength. From the first, she'd amazed him with her strength, determination, and tenacity. Her brown eyes conveyed so many emotions, reflecting her mood. The core of steel hidden within in her demanded his respect for her. She never raised her voice, never shouted. Yet she commanded his and everyone else's attention and obedience. When Apophis lay in pain in the infirmary and he wanted him to suffer, she merely asked him to step aside, her voice firm, brooking no argument.
She confused him. He considered her a friend, almost as close a friend as his teammates. The feelings she evoked in him reminded him of what he felt for Drey'ac when he was first courting her. He still loved Drey'ac even though they were no longer married. Before she had left with Rya'c for the Land of Light, they had a very long talk. About their former marriage, the distance that was growing between them ever since he had turned against Apophis and the other false gods, Rya'c and his future as the son of the traitor Teal'c. It grieved him, to see the distance between him and his family, knowing he was the main cause for it. To know what they once shared was know gone, perhaps for good.
And now there was this Tau'ri woman who puzzled him. Remarkable and determined, she let nothing stop her from helping others. She even fought to save the life of Apophis knowing the Goa'uld was a mortal enemy of her people. Time after time, he had seen her do amazing things, cope with completely unknown diseases and injuries, in addition to treating alien beings whom she had almost no knowledge of how to treat. She constantly amazed him with her strength and will. Amazed and bewildered him. She was so different from the women of his planet. He didn't know how to deal with her. At least with Captain Carter, he could relate to her as a fellow warrior even though female Jaffa warriors were rare on Chulack. But with the doctor, he didn't quiet know how to relate to her. When he looked at her, something stirred within him, made him want to know her better, to ease the pain and tiredness from her eyes after a bad day in the infirmary. These feelings went deeper than friendship, leaving him in turmoil.
"Dr. Frasier."
Janet turned around, watching as he approached her. He was wearing loose grey robes, styled after the clothes on Abydos.
"Teal'c."
"I have come to say goodbye, Dr. Frasier, and to thank you for all you have done for myself and my family."
She shook her head slightly. "I was only doing my job."
"Nevertheless, you have done so much for myself. Including watching over me for the last three weeks." He paused, looking down at her. A memory returned, her looking at him as he awakened, joy and something else in her eyes. Without thinking, he raised his hand to touch her. Janet's breath caught as he hesitated, bewilderment in his eyes.
"Teal'c" Her voice trailed off as his long fingers just brushed against her cheek. She sighed, her breath flowing over his skin.
Her skin felt silky and soft under his fingers. Watching her, his fingers trailed down her cheek, memorizing the feel of her. She didn't pull away and she didn't look repulsed by his touch. Instead, her eyes locked on his, and he felt reality narrow down to only the two of them. Growing bolder, he cupped her face in his large hand. Her eyes drifted closed, head turning so her lips just brushed his palm. They stayed like that for a long time.
Reluctantly, Teal'c stepped back. The confusion he was feeling was mirrored perfectly by her. Sadness also shone from her eyes as she gave him a small smile.
"I have to go now."
"I know."
"I hope one day I will be able to come back to this world. I have made many friends who I do not want to lose."
"So do I, Teal'c." She watched as he walked away from her. "So do I." The last was whispered as he disappeared from the infirmary.
END
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