Somethings Aren't Worth Giving Up
Somethings Aren't Worth Giving Up
by Jonic Recheio
Summary: Jack stopped, standing some five feet in from of her. "Because I." he stopped, his eyes misting. He didn't know what to do, not in a million years had he imagined this. "I.love you, and I can't lose you!"
Category: Angst, Drama, Mystery
Season: any Season
Pairing: Jack/Sam
Rating: GEN
Warnings: character death
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 2005-05-07
"No! wait!" O'Neill called desperately to Sam's retreating form. "Sam! Please!"
She stopped and whirled around, her eyes blazing with anger. "Why!? Dammit why!?"
Jack stopped, standing some five feet in from of her. "Because I..." he stopped, his eyes misting. He didn't know what to do, not in a million years had he imagined this. "I...love you, and I can't lose you!"
"Then you should have thought first!" Carter thundered back. Jack flinched at her tone. "You should have thought before doing this, Jack!"
He stared back at her, still too confused, hurt, and scared to speak. His breath was coming in short gasps and his feet were firmly planted, not moving on his command. This was not what he had imagined, not ever. Not even in his wildest fantasies. He never thought she'd actually leave when he told her. This was a shock. 'It shouldn't be O'Neill.' He told himself. 'What could she possibly see in a misfit like you?'
"I..." he stuttered, not able to make much sense of his thoughts. "I didn't mean..."
Sam's eyes softened for a moment, showing the sadness and hurt that was fresh in her soul. "Jack...I can't do this."
O'Neill blinked back the mutinous tears that were ready to fall from his eyes. "Why?" He croaked out brokenly.
Sam's resolve faltered. She stared into his eyes, eyes that were rapidly loosing their luster, and life, eyes that were becoming lifeless, with nothing in them but a broken soul. He looked broken standing there, his shoulders slumped and his ever fiddling hands still at his side. He seemed to be staring at her, pleading with her to not go, to stay and keep him alive.
"Because..." She stopped not able to think of something to say. "I..."
"Sam." He whispered. "Please...don't go. I can't live with out you. Please."
"Jack!" She choked another bout of tears. "I can't...you're...I don't think that I can live with that."
His soul seemed to leave him at that moment. His eyes hardened and all the remaining barriers he had left came back up. "Fine." He said evenly, his voice devoid of all emotion. "Go, get out! I don't give a damn!"
Carter stood shocked as she watched him stalk back towards the house. He walked inside and slammed the door shut, hard, the sound resounded in her ears long after the fact. She stood there for what seemed like eternity then she heard a gunshot.
"Oh god!" She moaned out. "Oh god no!" Sam's legs began to move. She ran as fast as she could towards the house. "No! No! Oh god please no!"
The sight that greeted her in the bedroom was one she was never going to forget. He was lying on the bed, pistol in his right hand, and a hole in his forehead. The blood was everywhere, staining the sheets and him. Frantically she ran towards the bed. Climbing over to him she took his bloody head and upper body on to her lap and into her arms.
"Oh Jack!" She sobbed. "God! What have I done!?"
~*~
Five years later...
The sun was setting, casting shadows on the house and it's interior. He could see the outline of her, standing in the kitchen, holding a mug of coffee. Her hair was sparkling in the sun and he wondered how she had managed to stay so beautiful, so young. But, that didn't matter. What did was the package he held in his hands. Carefully he walked over to the mailbox and stuck it inside. She would find it later, of that he was sure.
The box held all of his records, his father's and his mother's. It told her all about him and his family, his heritage, the reason she left. It was a hard thing to deal with, and it seemed to hard for her. Rather than toughing it out like the solider she was trained to be, she ran, breaking him to pieces that could never be put back together in the process.
What was in the package was for her only, and he knew she knew that. What he wouldn't give to take back that day, the whole damn three months, and do it over. If he did, she would still be with him; they'd be married with two kids and living happily ever after. But, such things would never come to pass. It was his curse, his life. Nothing could change it and nothing would.
Saying his last silent farewell he walked off down the street and into the sunset. She'd know then, and she would understand that something's aren't worth giving up.
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