Ascension Aftermath II
Ascension Aftermath II
by Miss Terri
TITLE: Ascension Aftermath II
AUTHOR: Miss Terri
EMAIL: tburger350@aol.com
CATEGORY: Romance, Series
PAIRING: Sam/Jack
SPOILERS: Ascension
SEASON / SEQUEL: future; sequel to Ascension Aftermath
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS: male/female relationship
SUMMARY: Jack talks to Sam after Ascension.
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Second in the series, pretty smarmy, but you know...
"Ugh, Carter, should I assume you have the time to talk now?" Now that he was in her office, with the door closed, O'Neil began to feel the tugging pains at the corners of his stomach. He clenched and unclenched his hands as he looking into her startling blue eyes.
"Sure, sir, I was just picking up a little." Carter and O'Neil both glanced around the office. To O'Neil it appeared to be miraculously neat, certainly a far cry from his own. She even had baskets neatly labeled in and out with the papers neatly stacked. "OK, if you say so Carter. Why don't you sit down so we can talk? I don't like feeling like I'm looming over you." They both took seats, Carter in her office chair, swiveling to contain her curiosity and O'Neil in the straight-back chair beside the desk.
The feeling of teacher-student that the desk implied did nothing to dispel his nervousness. He cleared his throat. "First off, let me have my whole say before you jump in. Is that OK?" "Certainly, sir, I have the utmost respect for anything you say." Sam watched as his eyes flashed and she noted the dangerous gleam. "Carter..Sam..This has nothing to do with the military. This conversation is me speaking to you, friend to friend, man to woman. Are you OK with that?"
"Sir, I mean Jack, I don't know why you're getting angry. Of course we're friends, go ahead." O'Neil felt his gut tighten again. "OK, here goes. I know that, ugh, you know that I care about you," he got no further as she interrupted him. "Yes, Jack, we both know that." "Carter, for God's sake, let me finish." "Yes, sir" she replied meekly.
"Oh, this is all going so wrong. He got up from the chair and started walking around the room. In the back of his mind, her knew if he moved as he spoke, unconsciously picking up items from around the room, perhaps it could contain the inner gnawing that he was feeling. ""First, I'm gonna state the obvious. I am old enough to be your father." He raised his hand as she started to speak. "Not now, Carter, I need to finish this. I was in battles that were fought when you were learning to walk. You are at the start of your career and I am, well, at least in the middle, since I came back from my retirement. But, anyway, the fact alone that I could retire at my age, says something. " He took a deep breath, and, almost afraid that she would jump in again, continued rapidly. "What I'm trying to say, Sam, is I know that there are a lot of differences between us, age not being the least of them. Then there's this rank thing, I am your Commanding Officer."
"I want you to put that aside, not really aside, I mean. I'd just like you to listen with an open mind. Can you do that?" He stopped and looked her directly in the eye. "Yes, Jack, I don't really view you as a person in those terms, but yes..." Sam responded.
"OK, Sam, here it is. I have feelings for you. Feelings that I thought I would never have again. Feelings that I thought died within me along with Charlie." "Please", he said holding his hand again as she started to speak. "I'm not talking about friendly feelings. I mean, of course, they're friendly, but they go much deeper. Sam, I'm trying to say that I care about you, not as a person, I mean yes, as a person, but as a woman." He looked at her directly again; trying to fathom what was going on behind those amazing blue eyes. He read uncertainty, not acceptance. Well, he'd gone this far, might as well make a fool of himself the whole way.
"What I mean, Sam, is that I want you as a woman." He rushed on as he saw the wrinkling of her forehead. "I don't mean just sex, Sam, I mean I care about you. God, I hate that word care. I don't know if it's love or like. I only know that you have become a part of me, in here." His hand went to his heart and then realizing that he must look like the idiot he felt, he moved his hand to his head. "In here, too. You're with me, in my mind even when you're not physically there. I know that two people's lives don't count for a hill of beans in this crazy world, what with the Goaulds and the vastness of what we're trying to accomplish. But, I need you to know that I can't be completely noble. I, Jack O'Neil deserve some kind of happiness in this life too. I've given; I want something back, not just the accolades of my superiors. I need something more, something that means something to me, personally." Now that he'd gotten it out, he felt like an animal, age, vulnerable, naked in front of her.
" I don't want an answer now. I want you to think about what I've said. I made the decision to tell you this, but I don't want to push you into an answer. We have a briefing in" he glanced at his watch, "two hours. Give yourself time to absorb what I've said and we'll talk later." He purposely strode from her office, quickly to the hall.
As he turned to close the door, he dared to look back at her. She was staring, fixedly, at a point in the room. He could tell her mind was in motion, but no reflection of what she thought was visible on her face. "Oh, God, he groaned to himself, what have I done?"
To be continued...
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