God Only Knows
God Only Knows
by Dr Sarah Fraiser-Jackson
Summary: Janet didn't die in Heroes. Jack is still frozen in Antarctica and Sam is missing.
Category: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drama, Romance
Episode Related: 721 Lost City
Season: Season 7
Pairing: Jack/Sam
Rating: GEN
Warnings: minor language
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 2005-03-15
General Hammond stood in the control room looking down at the remaining members of SG1 ready to depart on a rescue mission.
"Doctor Jackson, Teal'c you have a go." He said as the wormhole whooshed to life. "Bring her home."
"We will Sir." Daniel said trying to persuade himself that this time they would, they had to; Sam was family. He waved then made his way up the ramp and through the blue event horizon.
Teal'c followed the younger man and bowed his head towards Hammond before stepping through to the other planet.
"Daniel Jackson, do you not think it wise to apply your sunscreen at this time?" Teal'c asked sheltering his eyes from the heat of the midday sun.
Since Daniel's normal mother hen was frozen until they could find a cure, Teal'c had taken it upon himself to make sure his friend looked after himself, ate and slept regularly and didn't get hurt.
"I'll be fine Teal'c." He said pulling his floppy hat out of his pack to shield his face. "There's sand in my pack already and we've only just got here!"
"You will complain more when the sand reaches places you prefer not to mention and irritates the sunburn you will receive from not applying your sunscreen."
"Alright, I'll put it on!" He said rummaging around for the elusive bottle of factor 30.
Half an hour later the duo were making their way away from the Stargate, across the barren desert.
"Teal'c," Daniel stopped in his tracks to take another swig from his water bottle. "Do you see that oasis or is it a mirage?"
"I do not see a mirror Daniel Jackson, only some vegetation and a pool of water."
"I take that as no, it's not a mirage." He said shaking his head and walking towards it. "You do know what a mirage is, don't you?"
"I do." Teal'c said following at a jog to catch up. "Daniel Jackson, I believe there is something or someone lying down in the shade."
"De drol!" Daniel swore in Dutch and started to run towards the figure on the ground.
Teal'c who had more sense; kept a look out for any signs of danger and held his staff weapon in a defensive position.
"Teal'c! It's Sam!" Daniel yelled back to the Jaffa. "I need some help here."
By the time Teal'c had gotten to them, Daniel had rolled Sam onto her back after checking for broken bones and deep cuts.
"She's breathing, but she must be really dehydrated. We have to get her back to the infirmary." He said wiping the sand from her sunburnt face.
Teal'c handed Daniel his staff weapon and picked the unconscious form of Samantha Carter up.
-------------------
"Unscheduled, incoming wormhole Sir." The gate technician informed the base CO.
"Medical team stand by."
"Receiving SG1 idc Sir."
"Open the iris, Fraiser to the gate room, Fraiser to the gate room." He yelled over the speakers.
"There are three persons in transit Sir." The tech said pointing to the screen.
As soon as SG1 stepped onto the ramp they were surrounded by the paramedics, Teal'c lowered Sam onto one of the stretchers and watched as she was taken up to the infirmary.
"Doctor Jackson, where did you find her?" Hammond asked striding over to him.
"About half a mile away from the gate Sir. We found an oasis and she was lying under one of the trees."
"Well done both of you, get showered and then go for your post mission medical." George clapped Daniel on the back. "You might want to put some after sun on your face son."
Daniel touched his cheek and felt the heat coming from it. "But I put sunscreen on!" He said to himself.
Teal'c smiled and walked out of the gate room, Daniel hot on his tail. "We weren't there for very long!"
---------------
"Sir, Major Carter has suffered from dehydration and sunburn, she has bruised ribs but no other visible signs of injury." Janet Fraiser paused in her conclusions. "She should be awake once she has enough liquids back in her."
"Thank you doctor." Hammond smiled and looked across to see Daniel sitting in a chair next to Sam's bed reading a book out loud and Teal'c standing guard at the end of her bed. If Jack were there he would have been in the other chair holding her hand.
The phone ringing in Janet's office stopped his musings; no one was around to answer it so George picked up the handset.
"Infirmary, this is General Hammond speaking."
"General, this is Colonel Hays at Antarctic base camp Sir. It's Colonel O'Neill Sir, he's thawing out."
"What?"
"The ice around him is melting Sir, from the reading we've taken, most of the Ancients abnormalities in the Colonel's brain have dissipated."
"That's incredible."
"It is Sir, permission to send the Colonel home?"
"Granted, as soon as he's stable at your end, then you can send most of the men back. Keep the scientists who want to study the technology there for another two weeks."
"Thank you Sir."
Hammond hung up, smiled and went to tell Janet and the rest of SG1.
--------------------------
Two hours later Janet found herself in Jack's office, the usual clutter had been tidied into boxes, which were still on the floor. Not really knowing what to do at the moment what with Sam still unconscious, Jack not due home for two days and no teams currently off world, so she started to unpack the Colonel's stuff.
After an hours hard work she finally had almost put everything back in it's original place-it's just lucky she had had to track the Colonel down so many times for physicals otherwise she would never have known where to put each photo or Game boy game.
She was on the last box; ripping off the tape sealing it she found a tatty photo album on the top. Janet carefully opened the photo album, knowing that something was bound to fall out or not be stuck down properly; after all it was Jack's. She scanned the pictures; the first couple were of his son Charlie in baseball gear and with the Colonel. Turning the page she saw a group photo of SG1, the Colonel's family over the past seven years.
A piece of folded paper wedged into one of the later pages caught the doctors eye, curiosity taking the better of her she turned to that page. She smiled as she saw the most recent pictures taken the week before they had heard of Anubises plans, at Cassandra's eighteenth birthday before the teenager went out with her friends. SG1, Hammond, Cassie and Janet were all smiling at the camera with their arms around each other. The next picture was similar apart from the fact that Sam and Jack were lying in a pile on the floor with everyone else staring at them, Jack had rushed back to his space before the went off and fell into his 2IC as the picture was taken, Janet smiled at the memories.
She glanced at the piece of paper in her hand, it read:
Dr. Major Samantha Jean Carter PhD.
She recognised the Colonel's scrawl of an excuse for handwriting, she thought better give it to her friend when she wakes up. But on the other hand, what if he didn't actually mean for Sam to read it? He should arrive back at the SGC within two days so should he give it to her himself if he wanted her to read it, or should Sam read it before he gets back? Deciding that she would have to read it to decide the best action, she considered her self officially off duty for the next however many minutes it would take to read the letter in case it was personal.
She carefully unfolded the paper there was a photo paper clipped to one corner, it had Sam, laughing at one of Jack's jokes no doubt and Jack, putting and arm around her shoulder-the perfect couple, they looked so natural together. Janet sighed and started to read the letter.
Sam, It's funny; I've attempted to start this letter God know how many times and I end up with just your name!
So, it's 0300 and I can't sleep, from what I can figure from this Ancient crap in my head this will be my last attempt at saving the sorry planet we call home. I won't be around anymore Sam so you'll have to look after Danny Boy for me, don't let him stay up late playing with his rocks, make sure he eats something other than coffee related food items, you know the drill. But seriously, look after yourself and your team. I talked to Hammond and you'll get full command of SG1 when I'm gone.
Saying this is my last act and everything is a bit depressing don't ya think? That's why I won't tell you in person, by the time you read this letter I will be dead and it won't matter anymore. But I have no regrets - well maybe one. I will regret not telling you how I feel, it may sound selfish now that you are happy with Pete but I still love you Sam. I always will, wherever I am, you'll never know how much, I doubt anyone does-as the Beach Boys once said "God only knows how I feel about you!"
The first day I met you, I remember it like it was yesterday, from the first feministic remark you had me falling for you and it's grown; every time you smile at one of my pathetic attempts at a joke or whenever you frown over a problem that you always solve in the end no matter what, I fall deeper and deeper in love with you. I know you don't feel that strongly for me, or if you do or did you've moved on and I'm happy for you, Pete's good for you and you deserve a nice life, a house with a white picket fence, 2.4 children and a dog named Scraps-you are not allowed to name your dog after some dead scientist guy Sam, that's my last official order to you as your commanding officer!
Have a nice life Sam, be happy and enjoy every last minute of it. Remember there's no place like home Dorothy!
All the love in my heart,
Your Scarecrow-Jack xxx
Janet wiped a tear away from her eye and turned the paper over, typical O'Neillism she thought, a P.S on the back!
P.S. Ding dong the witch is dead!
Janet laughed to herself. "The witch is defiantly dead Colonel, you made sure of that."
-----------------------
Jack was shipped to the SGC infirmary two weeks after the letter was found by Janet, she hadn't told anyone but kept it in her pocket to give to Sam when she woke up.
Jack arrived unconscious, he was very pale with dark rings under his eyes, he was placed in the bed next to Sam so that Daniel and Teal'c could be near both their friends. Jack's scans showed that the knowledge of the Ancients had been somehow wiped from his brain yet again; it was unknown how that had happened without the interference from the Asgard. The scientists posted at the Antarctic base had run tests on the device the Colonel was frozen in but the results had come back negative to all the scans and experiments done.
Sam was still unconscious, the sunburn had turned into a nice tan that a Spaniard would have been envious of, along with a cluster of darker freckles covering her cheeks and nose.
"Hello Daniel." Janet said making the archaeologist jump up from where his head had been resting on his chest.
"Janet!"
"Daniel why don't you go and rest, you look like hell." She said putting her hand on his head. "You feel warm, do feel ill at all?"
"No." He said avoiding the piercing brown eyes; that is until he sneezed.
"Daniel."
"Alright, I do feel rough. It's probably just a cold or something, lack of sleep?" He asked hopefully not wanting to leave his friends because he's got an infectious disease or something.
"It probably is lack of sleep, come on you can sleep over here." She said pointing to an empty bed opposite Sam and Jack's beds.
"Thanks Jan." He smiled sweetly and rubbed one of his baby blue eyes. "Jack, Sam I'll just be over there if you need me okay?" He told the unconscious bodies.
Patting Jack on the arm he tried to move away.
"Janet!" He gasped. "I can't let go!"
"What?" She cried and ran towards him.
"Argh!" He cried out in pain as a white light went into his hand, he felt like a fire was burning up his arm and through his body.
"Daniel!" She yelled trying to pull him away from Jack.
Daniel stopped screaming as the pain dissipated and the glowing stopped, he moved away from his friend and sank back into the chair.
Janet put her hand on his head again. "Are you all right? You're fever's gone!" She said surprised.
"I feel fine," He said equally shocked. "My headaches gone, I don't feel rough anymore."
Janet moved from Daniel to Jack and placed her hand on his head carefully. Jack's eyes shot open and startled the poor doctor.
"Colonel?"
"Hey Doc!" He said gruffly. "What happened?"
Janet smiled at him restraining the urge to jump around and give him a big hug.
"You don't remember?"
"Would I ask if I did?"
"No, what's the last thing you remember?" She asked as she checked his monitors for abnormalities.
"Uh, the Ancient stuff was downloaded into my brain wasn't it?" He waited for her nod before carrying on. "Ah crap! I remember a lot of flying around with Bra'tac trying to find that damn outpost, everything up to being frozen I guess."
"Everything?" Daniel asked hopefully.
He turned towards the voice. "Hey Danny boy! Didn't see you down there." He smiled. "I can't remember all that Ancient stuff though."
"Oh, never mind." Daniel shrugged. "Glad you're back with us."
"So what's happened since I've been away?"
"Well, I kind of had an idea that you could be saved if we find the rest of the Ancient outposts so Hammond agreed to let teams go and search for them. Cut a long story short Sam was out with SG3 but they came back without her..."
"What?!"
"Colonel calm down." Janet warned watching his heart monitor and blood pressure.
"Jack, she's over there." He pointed towards Sam's bed.
"Is she okay? What happened?"
"Apparently the locals on the planet thought that blondes were devils, or something. They sent her through the gate to another planet; Major Griff only managed to get the last four symbols on the DHD so we tried every planet with those last few co-ordinates. We eventually found her on a desert planet, she'd managed to get her self to a small oasis but she was badly sunburnt and dehydrated, she must have bruised her ribs when she was thrown through the gate." Daniel finished.
"Is she going to be okay?"
"Yes Colonel, she should be fine. She hasn't woken up yet, I'm not sure why though. It's been three weeks so she should be up in the next few days."
"Why was she with SG3?"
"Well she suggested to Hammond that a scientist and archaeologist went with each team to search for the outposts and the Lost City. She was the only one available at the time." Daniel explained.
"Well as much as I am enjoying this conversation you both need to rest and give me some peace and quiet!" and give me time to figure out what happened just now! She added mentally.
"But I just woke up!"
"But I feel fine now!"
"Rest! Now!" Janet said sternly.
Daniel said goodbye to Jack and went to tell Teal'c and General Hammond that Jack was awake; then he promised Janet he would go to his quarters and sleep for at least four hours.
Once Janet was sure that Jack was asleep she went to her office to grab a cup of coffee and go over Jack's medical notes for the past two weeks and see if they link with the first time he was a walking Ancient dictionary.
Jack opened one eye slowly making sure no one was there to stop him. He gradually eased himself off the bed and made his way over to Sam's bed.
"You didn't find the letter then?" He whispered sitting on the chair next to her bed. "You look so beautiful, Pete is one lucky guy."
Sighing he stretched out his arms. "So long Ancient knowledge." He said as he laid one hand on Sam's head and the other on her arm. The glowing white light that had shot up Daniel's arm earlier now left Jack's hands and penetrated her skin, moving through her body healing the ribs and re-hydrating better than any modern medicine could do. Sam's monitors were going wild, beeping and whining; Janet rushed in to see Jack slumping into his chair exhausted.
"Colonel! What were you doing?" She cried rushing over to the man.
"Helping her." He panted.
"Now you do need to rest." She said pulling him by the arm.
"Janet?" She heard a very familiar whisper.
"Sam?" She turned to see the major trying to sit up in her bed.
"What happened?"
--------------------
"So you see Sir, by healing Major Carter and Dr. Jackson's cold the Colonel's brain waves are back to normal." She said putting the file on the briefing room table in front of her.
"You mean to tell me that we have the original Jack O'Neill back with us with no other side effects?"
"Yes General, before he healed them his brain still had slight anomalies but now it is completely normal." She smiled. "Both Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter are, or should be resting at the moment. They'll be ready for active duty in another week or so."
"Thank you doctor. There is a slight problem; Jack is officially retired as of when SG1 were on board the Alkesh trying to find the Lost City of Atlantis, I need to talk to him about all of this."
"Yes Sir."
-----------------------
When Janet walked back into her infirmary Colonel was no where to be seen, Sam was sitting up in bed reading a trash romance novel that one of the nurses had leant her to quell her boredom, it wasn't working mind you!
"So I take it the Colonel has made a jail brake?"
"More like a toilet brake." Sam smiled.
"Well least he isn't complaining constantly about being cooped up here." Janet said sitting on the end of Sam's bed.
"Must be his new outlook on life."
"Or the company." Janet said raising her eyebrows.
"What do you mean?" Sam said laying the book down on the bed.
"Well, I found something you might want to read. He didn't think he was coming back Sam." She pulled the folded up letter and photo out of her pocket and placed it on the bed. She smiled and left the room, leaving Sam alone with the letter.
Cautiously Sam unfolded the letter and began to read it.
--------------
As Jack climbed back into his bed he noticed the photograph from the letter on Sam's bedside table. Sam was lying on her side with her back facing him; at first he thought she was asleep until she sniffed.
"Sam?"
"I...I just wanted you to know, I didn't know I'd live through it." He said softly moving towards her bed.
"Sam, talk to me. Please?"
She rolled over to face him, her eyes red from crying. Jack noticed the letter in her hand.
"Jack," She paused and met his deep brown eyes with her blue ones. "I missed you so much, I didn't want to believe you were gone but everyone kept saying there was no hope of getting you back. On that planet I was on my own and I thought that I would be with you soon, I knew that I wouldn't be able to get home and I just gave up. Then I wake up and you're back here alive, I thought I was dead at first. Well, I guess what I'm trying to say is that I...I love you."
A fresh batch of tears weld-up in her eyes and started rolling down her cheeks. Jack sat on the edge of her bed and pulled her into an embrace.
"Shh Sam, it's okay." He said stroking her hair. "We'll figure something out." He planted a kiss on the top of her head.
Hammond smiled and walked out of the infirmary from his hiding place behind a large filing cabinet.
-------------------
"You wanted to talk to me General?" Jack asked as he popped his head around the office door a week later.
"Yes Jack, come in and have a seat." Hammond said pointing to the seat in front of him. "Now, as you are well aware you are retired for the third time from my command and that's just not acceptable Jack! I am asking you to come back and take command..."
"General," O'Neill cut in. "I don't want a command. I am retired from the Air Force once and for all."
"I understand Son."
"No I've made up my...you do?"
"Yes Jack, I do. That is why I am asking you to work here as a civilian consultant in the fight against the Goa'uld and training new recruits."
"So in other words I'd be doing what I do now but without the paperwork and chain of command?"
"Precisely." The old Texan smiled. "Well, what do you say?"
"I...I think I'll have to say yes, but this means that I have no power anymore?"
"I wouldn't say that, with your history and knowledge of the Air Force rules and regulations you would still be intimidating. Plus no one would have to know, they still call retired officers by their ranks."
"But SG1?"
"Major Carter would still take command, they'll need a new team member but you will be with them most of the time anyway." He sighed pushing a contract forward. "Just sign the paper Jack, we can discuss duties and responsibilities later."
"Of course George." He grabbed a pen and scribbled his signature on the dotted line.
"Don't push it Colonel." He warned. "Remember I can have you transferred to our Antarctic base, I know you love the cold weather."
"Yes Sir, sorry Sir." Jack muttered sarcastically.
"Now go and tell your ex-team." Hammond ordered and watched his highest-ranking civilian almost skip out of the room.
-------------------
"Hey Sam!" Jack said walking into her lab and plonking himself down on one of the stools. "What you doing?"
"Trying to..." She looked up from her doohickeys. "You don't care do you?"
"Not in the slightest." He grinned. "So is it really important or can you take a coffee break right about now?"
"I can take a break, what you have in mind?"
"Well I need to talk to you about where we stand..."
"Well there are the Regs." She said quietly.
"Actually there aren't, I'm retired from the Air Force and work as a civilian consultant." He reached for her hand. "Look, I know there's Pete and everything but I love you and I want to be with you."
"I called Pete after you'd been frozen, and told him that I realised the man I loved had just died and I couldn't go out with him anymore." She smiled. "I love you Jonathan James O'Neill with two l's." She closed the gab between them and kissed him tenderly on the lips.
A knock at the door drew them apart.
"Jack!" Daniel whined. "Teal'c is annoying me."
"What's he doing Danny?"
"He won't let me do anything."
"That is not true O'Neill." Teal'c said walking up behind the archaeologist. "I will not permit Daniel Jackson to peel his sunburn because he will make it sore."
"Daniel, what have I told you?" He said sternly.
"But it..."
"No buts, come on, I'll get Doc. Fraiser to have a look at it." He sighed and grabbed Daniel by the hand. "Once I've dealt with the children we need to finish our conversation." Jack said winking at Sam.
"Yes we do. Daniel you behave yourself or you can go to bed with no coffee."
"You wouldn't dare!" He said mortified.
"Wanna bet?"
"I'll be good." He shouted as Jack pulled him out of the room closely followed by Teal'c.
"Men!" Sam laughed to herself and started to scratch her own sunburn. "Damn it! Jack wait for me!" She called as she sprinted out of the room.
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