Medical examination
Medical examination
by starry_eyed_surprise
Summary: Jack has been a bad boy. again
Category: Humor
Episode Related: 405 Divide and Conquer
Season: Season 4
Pairing: Jack/Sam
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: none
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 06/23/03
Author's notes: This is all Annie's fault, really. She made me write this story, because of some Jackclone. And this is the result. Hope you like, and if you don't... don't blame me.
Thankies to Susan and Tricia for betaing this story.
20-06-2003
Janet sighed. She had just finished Sam's monthly physical check-up and now it was Colonel O'Neill's turn. Sam had been complaining about him, again. The guy really should get a life.
The last couple of missions had been pretty tough for SG1, so they were given some rest. Which meant that Sam finally had some time to work on her labprojects. Which also meant that after Colonel O'Neill had finished all his paperwork, he got bored. Really bored. And Sam was always his first victim to get rid of that boredom. Of course, he distracts her, which stresses her out. She has got a great deal of pressure on her to come up with new technical wonders. And then, she comes complaining to Janet. Like right now. This wasn't the first time, oh no, but lately some things had changed. It was like something about it disturbed Sam more than it should. And that wasn't about her getting distracted. Janet wasn't sure what the problem was. Well, she had to admit that they'd been through a rough period. She had been forced to witness some of it, but there wasn't much she could do to help. Only listen and try to understand them.
A part of her understood Jack. The only way he could be around Sam, without being too suspicious, was on base, in her lab. But that didn't change the fact that Sam needs to get some work done.
Those damn regs. Life would be so much easier without them. Jack could hang around Sam off base, she could do her job properly and she wouldn't need to complain to Janet. At least not about not being able to work... Of course, that also meant she couldn't make him pay for his attitude, which was always lots of fun. That was exactly what she was going to do. Taking some appropriate needles, she went over to Colonel O'Neill's cubicle to do his physical. She had those stocked especially for occasions like this one. She smiled sweetly at him. "Hello, Colonel O'Neill."
From the moment she entered his cubicle, he knew he was in trouble. There was something about her smile. It was a little too cheery. Looking at her suspiciously, he said, "Hi, Doc. What's up?"
"Oh, you know, the usual." She started her examination. "Major Carter was complaining about you, again."
Yup, he definitely was in trouble. Deep trouble. He tried to play innocent. "Why? What did I do this time?"
A needle shot up his right arm. Hard. He winced. This really wasn't the time to play stupid. Not when Doc was playing with her needles.
Drawing his blood, she said, "Do you know how much pressure she is under to come up with new solutions? The Pentagon feels like she should cut her time on missions so she has more time to work on her projects. And you are not helping her much."
His face went blank.
"Erm, no, I didn't know that. Carter never said anything about it."
At least he had the decency to look guilty.
"I don't believe she never asked you politely to go away so that she could get some work done. Get up and loosen your belt."
Getting up, he thought about that. He couldn't remember her ever telling him to go away. She never got mad at him for being there. And when she would point out she needed to do some work, he would just sit down and start fiddling with some of her doohickeys. He loved watching her while she worked. He couldn't understand how that could disturb her. He wasn't making any noise. That was the point of it. Becoming invisible, so he could stare at her, watching her every move. Until he broke the doohickey of course. Then she would look up at him, surprised to see that he was still there. He would give her his best 'oops'-expression and get up to leave. She would just smile and shake her head and continue her work. Nothing wrong there, right? He sighed,
"Well, someone has got to make sure she gets enough rest and enough to eat."
He knew it was a lame excuse and the needle jabbing into his butt confirmed it. He swallowed the pain away.
Wrong answer, I suppose.
"You know, she really should get a life instead of working in her lab 24/7."
"If you would get off her back, she might just be able to get one."
Ah, right. Good point.
"So here is the deal: you leave Major Carter alone in her lab or otherwise I am forced to get out the really big needles."
He swallowed, audibly. How could those things get even bigger? At that moment he felt another needle going into his butt. Two shots? Since when did they get two? He was almost sure the Doc was doubling his dose just for the means of torturing him. He hated needles, he really hated needles. Really.
"Doc, is that oath you took worth nothing to you?" He complained, rubbing the place on his butt where seconds ago a needle had been.
"Yes, it means a great deal. I'm doing this all for the sake of Major Carter."
"What about my sake?"
She just raised her eyebrows.
After some more prodding, the physical was finally done. He was sure he wouldn't be able to sit for the next couple of days or write for that matter.
He decided to look for Sam. He thought he deserved some time with her after Doc's torturing. Though he realized it would probably only get him into more trouble.
Yeah, well, some more Doc-torture wouldn't kill him. He had survived worse. And since Sam's smile was worth dying for... oh, yeah, he was so gonna visit her.
And with a big smile he left the infirmary.
THE END
ses
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