Blessings
Blessings
by Samantha Petersen
TITLE: Blessings
AUTHOR:Samantha Petersen
EMAIL: Sampeterse@aol.com
CATEGORY: Sam and Jack
SPOILERS:
SEASON / SEQUEL: To understand what is taking place here, it is recommended you read Avalon Moon and After the Spring.
RATING: PG13
CONTENT WARNINGS: Some screaming and name calling later on in the story, Angst. No sex- sorry.
SUMMARY: The events of Avalon Moon affect Sam's life.
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Thanks to Miki for betaing this. This green's for you girl.
Captain Samantha Carter stood with the rest of her team, waiting for the last chevron to lock. Half the SG teams were down with a rather nasty flu bug, which had swept through the base. As a result, they were heading out for the second time that week, and they were all looking tired. Her stomach churned with a nervousness she hadn't felt since her first trip through the Stargate; either that or it hadn't liked dinner the night before. She turned her head as she felt the concerned gaze of her commanding officer on her. She gave him a small smile.
"Are you okay, Captain?" Colonel O'Neill asked his brow creased in worry.
"Nothing a little downtime and a lot of sleep wouldn't cure. That and getting away from the food here on base." She brought a hand up, massaging the base of her neck. She could feel a headache building as well.
"That'll kill anyone unlucky enough to chose the wrong dish," he teased back.
"Tell me about it, whatever I chose last night was the wrong thing."
"You don't remember what you had?" The worry was back in his voice. Dark brown eyes looked her over, taking in her entire appearance.
"Not really, grab a tray and headed back to the lab. Ate while I ran some tests on the artifacts we brought back from P6X789. Daniel found me in there asleep at my desk about ten last night." She smiled ruefully.
"When we get back, I'll see if I can't get us all a few days on stand down. We could all use the time off. Also check in with Doctor Fraiser. You're looking a little pale right now too. Make sure you aren't coming down with this damn flu."
"Yes, sir." It had been two months since their trip to P5X345, also called Avalon by Daniel. The events there had brought a new tension to two of the members of SG-1. The flirtation that normally existed between Jack and Sam was gone, each afraid of making the wrong move in front of the wrong person and the events of what really had happened on that planet could come to light. They'd talked about it, worked their feelings out between one another. Sam smiled softly; Jack had almost been courting her in his own way.
A way which was safe for them given their current status as commanding officer and subordinate. Hockey trips to Denver to watch the Avalanche away from the eyes and ears of SGC. Evenings with the other team members were now more frequent, almost as if Daniel and Teal'C were chaperones.
Her train of thought was broken as the last chevron locked and the gate opened. "All right, kids, roll out," Jack commanded as they all started up the gate, their equipment quietly rolling before them.
Sam paused before entering the wormhole, taking a deep breath in an attempt to calm her stomach. She felt a hand on her shoulder. Looking up, she saw Jack again. "Are you sure you're okay?"
She nodded, she hadn't even realized he was still there. "Just fine, Colonel. See you on the other side." With another nod, she stepped into the wormhole.
Jack watched where she'd disappeared for a minute, then followed. He'd be keeping an eye on her this mission. It wasn't good for any member of the team to be sick; they never knew what they might run into on any given planet at any moment. This wasn't their first trip to this planet, but they never knew if the Goa'uld had decided to drop by there in the mean time. He stepped out of the gate in time to see a blur darting for nearby bushes.
Looking around, all he spotted were Daniel, Teal'C and they're equipment. "I take it that was Carter?" He nodded his head in the direction the blur had taken.
"Yes, she came out of the gate looking an interesting shade of green." Daniel looked up from the DHD he'd been studying.
"And that doesn't worry you?" O'Neill kept an eye on the direction Sam had disappeared to.
"Jack, half the base has been battling the flu for the passed two weeks. One of us was bound to get it. Sam's been putting in long hours in her lab the whole time, not to mention those of us who haven't been sick have been going on more missions to take up the slack ... combine a nasty flu bug with exhaustion and you're going to get sick." Daniel shrugged them went back to what he'd been doing.
"Let's all keep a close eye on her and each other. Anyone else starts to get sick or if she gets worse, we're heading back. Mission or no mission, sick team members are a liability. I'm going to see if she needs anything. You two hold down the fort." Jack headed off in the direction he'd seen Sam take, stopping only long enough to grab a canteen of water.
He found Carter as she was making her way back to the rest of the team. Even in the dim light, her face was pale, and covered with a fine sheen of sweat. She still looked shaky. "Feeling better?" He asked as he handed her the canteen.
"Just peachy." She gratefully took it from him, she rinsed her mouth our before taking a tentative swallow.
"You should have stayed home. We could have found a temporary replacement while you get over this bug." The worried expression was back on Jack's face, his forehead furrowed as his eyebrows scrunched together.
"There aren't that many people left who aren't sick, Sir. I'm really not feeling that bad. It's just a light touch and the roller coaster ride of the gate didn't help. Now that I'm back on solid ground I'm feeling better," Sam argued with him.
Without thinking, Jack reached up and touched her forehead, unconsciously looking for a fever, much like he'd done for Charlie when he'd been a small child.
"See no fever. I'm fine..." She smiled at him.
The fingers trailed from her forehead and down her cheek. When they finally came to rest, his hand gently cupped her cheek. Dark brown eyes stared into her blue ones. A rare moment when he actually dared to show how deep his emotions ran. "Doesn't mean one won't develop. I want you to take it easy. Help Daniel with his rocks, Teal'C and I will stand guard."
She opened her mouth to argue with him again. "No arguments, Captain, it's an order." His tone belayed any harshness his works might have held. His concern for her was more than obvious in it.
"Yes, sir," Carter acquiesced with a nod. "We should head back to camp..."
Listening closely for a moment to make sure Daniel and Teal'C hadn't come looking for them, he leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss onto her forehead.
Sam smiled softly, he so rarely showed this gentle side to anyone, and it never came out while he was on base. "Still no fever," she whispered as she reluctantly stepped back from him and headed towards their camp and the stargate.
"At least not that type," Jack muttered to himself once she was out of earshot.
===============================
The sun rose too early the next morning for the members of SG-1. Travelers on earth had never experienced jet lag of this magnitude, nor would they ever. It had been seven in the morning when they'd entered the gate; estimated local time on the planet upon arrival had been ten at night. Add in time to set up camp, do reconnaissance, and secure the area, it had been three in the morning before they'd bunked down for whatever rest they could.Teal'C stood at his ever present guard, allowing the others to rest.
The light of the new day quickly woke Jack and Daniel. Uncharacteristically, Sam made no move in her bag.
"Rise and shine, Carter." O'Neill ordered as he and Daniel started pulling MRE's out of their supplies.
There was no answering movement from her sleeping bag. He got up and went to nudge the bag with his boot. He paused, then knelt next to it. He pulled that bag back from her face. He didn't like what he saw. "Daniel, dial us home now. Mission's been scrubbed." He reached out and gently touched Carter's flushed and sweat covered face. A fever raged beneath his fingertips. "We'll send someone back for the equipment..." Sam continued to sleep on. "Damn ... hurry up, Daniel..."
Leaving Sam in her sleeping bag, Jack picked her up, carrying her towards the gate, waiting impatiently for Daniel to get the wormhole open.
"Come on, Carter, wake up and talk to me..." He talked to her, hoping to get through the fever.
He heard the familiar whoosh from the gate. "Code's been sent, Jack, go on, we'll follow." He vaguely heard Daniel's voice before entering the wormhole and heading for home.
"Hate to be in her shoes when she's feeling better," Daniel commented as he and Teal'C grabbed their backpacks and followed through the gate.
Coming through the other side, Jack was met by the gate room's security force. They were always in place when an unscheduled traveler came through. "We need a medical team," he yelled out, quickly moving down the ramp.
In the background, he heard General Hammond repeat his order. "We're almost there, Sam," he whispered to the woman in his arms as he started to make his way to the infirmary, intending to meet the team. He was no doctor, but even he knew that they had to get her fever down.
He met the medical team about halfway down the hall. He quickly laid Carter down on the gurney. Janet Fraiser immediately assessed the situation. Asking Jack questions at a rapid fire pace as they flew down the hall.
Arriving at the infirmary, she turned to O'Neill. "Wait out here, Colonel. We'll get treatment started and get her settled. You'd only be in the way in there." With that, the doors closed behind her.
When Daniel and Teal'C joined him ten minutes later, he was already pacing the small hallway outside the doors. His movements didn't cease as they stepped up to him.
"Any word yet?" Daniel asked, glancing at the closed doors.
"None. That fever was so high, I could feel it through the sleeping bag. I knew I should have sent us home last night..." His words trailed off as he started mentally kicking himself again.
"Jack, we all know Sam. She's not one to admit a weakness, especially something like the flu. She's just like you are in that regard."
Jack choked back a small laugh. "Trying to say we're bull headed?"
"In a polite way." Daniel smiled at the other man, glad to see that O'Neill was starting to relax, at least the pacing had stopped.
Jack sighed heavily and leaned against the wall opposite the closed doors.
"You care about her," Daniel stated as he took up a similar position next to him.
"Excuse me?" O'Neill raised an eyebrow towards the younger man.
"More than a Colonel should for his Captain. She feels the same way."
Jackson nodded towards the doors.
"What makes you think that?" Jack's entire stance had stiffened.
"Come on, Jack. We're together most almost twenty-four, seven. I'd have to be blind not to notice the looks you give each other, the flirtation, the tension. There have been rumors running around this place since the beginning, but no one's been able to substantiate them. Your secret's safe with me. I know what it's like to fall in love with someone you're not supposed to."
Jack looked up and down the hallway. Besides Teal'C, they were alone, and he knew the Jaffa wouldn't say anything either. "There's nothing really official or unofficial yet, Daniel. When we leave here, we each go to our own places..."
"You don't have to explain, Jack. I'm actually glad, you two were made for each other." Daniel grinned and slapped him on the shoulder just as the infirmary doors opened and Dr. Fraiser stepped out.
"Doc?" Jack stepped forward, questions and concern written all over his face.
"She's got a bad case of the flu. She's also dehydrated. She's still unconscious, but we've got her settled. We're taking measures to lower the fever and re-hydrate her. She's resting right now, which is what her body needs to fight this. I recommend you three do the same thing, I don't want to see either you Colonel or Daniel in my infirmary. Understand?" She looked each man in the eye, letting them know she was serious.
"Five minutes?" Jack asked.
Fraiser raised an eyebrow, her mind working furiously. A small smile toyed at her lips before her serious professional mask took over again. "Two minutes and not a second more."
Jack nodded and slipped passed her, heading straight for Sam's bed.
"Dr. Jackson, I don't want to see you in here before tomorrow morning, unless you have a medical emergency."
"Yes, ma'am." Daniel smiled; his tone teasing and exhausted at the same time. "Now that we know Sam's okay, I feel like I could sleep a week anyways."
"If only I could get the General to give that order to everyone," Janet sighed, pushing her hair back from her face.
"That bad?"
"We've had six new cases today, not counting Sam. Go on, I have to see to each of them and chase a Colonel out of here."
Together, Teal'C and Daniel turned and headed down the hall for the elevators which would take them to their respective quarters. Janet watched them for a moment, then with a tired sigh; she went back into the infirmary. Now to get a bullheaded Colonel to listen.
An hour later, Fraiser looked up from one of her patients to see that Sam was finally stirring. Eyes blinked open as she moved over to her friend's bedside. "Welcome back to the land of the living."
Confused blue eyes blinked several more times, before Sam looked around. "What?" she croaked out.
"You've got the flu. Colonel O'Neill brought you back here when you wouldn't wake up this morning. You had a high fever which we managed to lower, and you were dehydrated, which we're taking care of with the IV."
Confusion turned to panic as Janet's words registered.
Fraiser sighed, then moved in closer. "Everything's okay so far. Later when you're feeling better, we'll run some tests, when there's fewer people around to ask questions. You know you have to be taking better care of yourself."
Eyes slowly closed in a combination of relief and exhaustion. Sam gave a slight nod of her head. "Sorry..." she whispered. "Felt okay last night. Just thought it was ... you know..."
Janet nodded. "You need to rest. I've managed to chase the hover brigade out of here. They won't be in until morning. Maybe by then, you'll feel up to visitors. Do you want any 7-Up or ginger ale?"
Sam shook her head. "Sleep..." she murmured.
"Then sleep. I'll be by to check on you later." Before Doctor Fraiser could move away, Sam weakly lifted an arm to stop her.
"Any meds?" she whispered.
"No, I didn't give you any. We found other ways to lower your fever. I'll go over that when you're more awake later. Sleep, doctor's orders."This time, Sam was asleep before Janet had a chance to move away.
It was late the next afternoon before Sam was really awake enough for Fraiser to allow the guys to come in for a visit. She still looked rather pale but the fever was gone. She visibly cringed when Jack walked in, knowing he was going to lecture her as soon as he knew she was up to taking it. He gave her a small smile and shook his head, letting her know that he wasn't about to start the lecture yet. She gave him a small smile in return, grateful for the reprieve. The lecture from Janet the night before had done more than his would, but he didn't know that yet.
"You still look like death warmed over, Captain, but that's an improvement over the way you looked when I last saw you." His tone was teasing, but an underlying hint of worry and concern were obvious to her.
"I really did feel fine when we talked ... this thing hit after we crashed..." she softly apologized, her voice still hoarse.
"It's okay, Carter, it happens to the best of us. Just next time you don't feel good while still at home, let me know." He pulled a chair closer and sat down.
"Yes, sir." She tried to sit up a little bit more, the slight movement left her shaking and exhausted.
"So how long are they keeping you in here?" He eyed her complexion, the worry flooding back into his face.
"Couple of more days at least. Then it's home to rest and recuperate.
Janet was thinking it might be a couple of weeks before she'll let me come back. I guess I got hit harder by this than most." She seemed to sink back into the bed as exhaustion once again threatened to overwhelm her.
"And she won't hesitate to kick my butt from here to kingdom come if I tire you out today. Rest, we can talk more later." He moved to get up. "Stay for a little while?" she softly pleaded with him, wanting his company in the sterile environment of the infirmary.
"Until you've fallen asleep again. I'll come back later this evening." He settled back down. It was a battle to keep himself from reaching for her hand. She looked so vulnerable lying there, a sight he was unaccustomed to when it came to Sam. She'd always seemed so strong. He could tell from the rhythm of her breathing that she was asleep again. He gently reached out, fingertips brushing her forehead. The skin he felt was cool to the touch. He breathed a silent sigh of relief.
"She's on the mend, Colonel," Doctor Fraiser's voice came from behind him.
He jerked his hand back suddenly. "She still looks so pale. She couldn't even stay awake for five minutes."
Janet watched his every movement, listened to more than just his words, the picture becoming clearer with each moment. "She's still sick, she'll be weak and tired for a while to come yet. This bug hit her like a Mack truck."
"Mack truck?" Jack looked up at her with a small smile. "Is that a complex medical term? You write that in a chart... 'the cold virus hit him like a Mack truck...'" His usual sarcasm came through as he teased Fraiser.
"Shhh, can't give all of the medical community's secrets away." Janet chuckled with a smile. She watched as O'Neill ran a hand over his short hair.
She noticed the shaking of his hand. "When was the last time you ate, Colonel?"
He thought for a minute. "On the mission..." he admitted.
"Sam's going to sleep for hours again. Go eat, and go get some more sleep yourself," Janet ordered him.
He looked over to the sleeping blonde in the hospital bed, reluctant to leave just yet.
"I can make that doctor's orders."
"All right. I'm going, I'm going..." He stood up. "I'll be back later. Don't be surprised if you see Daniel or Teal'C in here."
"I've already chased each of them away once. I suspect I'll be doing that a lot with all three of you until I release Sam. The general has all of you on stand down until Sam's recovered. He doesn't want to risk sending you off world again and have someone else getting sick." She stepped back from the bed. "I need to check on my other patients. Go eat."
"Going," he said, snapping a mock salute as he headed for the door. With one last look back at the bed, he slipped out of the infirmary. With a shake of her head, Janet looked down at her sleeping friend. "Sam, we need to talk..." she muttered before walking away from the bed.
===============================
It was another two days before Sam was finally awake more than she was asleep. An unappetizing looking breakfast sat on a tray in front of her as she and Doctor Fraiser talked.
"Do you think my traveling through the gate with this bug made it worse?" she asked, picking at the unbuttered toast in front of her.
"It's a possibility, but I can't say for certain that's what made it hit you harder. There are a couple of other factors in play with you."
Sam nodded. "That was my next question. If there's the possibility that gate travel made a flu bug worse, then what could it do to..." Her words trailed off as she saw her team members walk into the infirmary.
Janet looked up, following Sam's gaze. "We'll finish this later. We can talk before I let them take you home." She gave Carter a friendly smile then moved off.
Daniel, Teal'C, and Jack stepped up to her bed at the same time.
"You're looking better than the last time I saw you, Sam," Daniel greeted with a smile.
"Feeling a little better. Hate being sick," she ruefully admitted, still picking at her uneaten toast.
"Going to pick that to death or eat it?" Jack nodded to the food on her plate.
"Pick it do death." Sam looked up at him, one eyebrow slightly arched.
"She'll eat it if she wants to go home this afternoon," Janet said as she stepped back up to the bed. "I told her this morning, I want to see her eating something before I'd let her out of here."
With a sigh, Sam picked up the toast and nibbled on one corner of it. "Happy?"
"I will be when at least that toast and banana are gone." Fraiser fixed a look on her, a silent message passing between them.
With another sigh, Sam cautiously took a large bite of the toast. *So far so good,* she thought to herself as her stomach remained calm.
"Good girl." Janet grinned. "If she eats something at lunch too, one of you can take her home this afternoon. She just needs to rest and recuperate, and she can do that a lot better in her own bed than here."
"One of us will be there with her until she's regained some of her strength back," Jack stated.
"Even better." She turned to look at Sam.
"Do I have a say in any of this? I don't need a nurse maid," Carter interjected, setting the remains of the toast down.
"For the first couple of days you do. You try to get out of bed without help and I can guarantee you'll be flat on your face. Let them help you, it's not often you have three men volunteering to nurse you..." Fraiser couldn't help the teasing tone in her voice.
Sam rolled her eyes, slightly, then shot Janet a warning look. There were some things she didn't want the guys finding out. "I'll run over on my lunch and grab you a pair of sweats to go home in," Janet continued, understanding the look.
"Thank you." Sam smiled in relief.
"Now eat your banana. And you guys need to shoo so she can get some more rest. Go eat your own breakfasts, I can tell by looking at you that none of you have eaten yet."
Jack and Daniel suddenly found something else in the room utterly fascinating. Teal'C canted his head towards Janet. "We have not," he simply stated.
Janet started laughing at the looks Jack and Daniel flashed towards the Jaffa. Even Sam was chuckling softly.
"Come on, George Washington, let's go get that breakfast seeing as I can tell from the doctor's face she's going to be kicking us out anyways." Jack said with a shake of his head. He gave Sam a smile and a small wave.
"Who is 'George Washington'?" Teal'C gave Jack a confused look.
"First president of the US." Daniel started on the explanation as the men left the infirmary. They could be heard until the doors swung shut behind them.
With the men gone, Janet perched on the edge of the bed again. "I'll come by tomorrow and we can finish our conversation with fewer ears around. There's a few other things we need to talk about as well." Her eyes locked on Sam's.
"Thought you promised not to ask any questions," Sam quietly responded, her gaze dropping.
"No questions, just talk. I'd be blind not to be able to see the clues though. You'll have to tell him eventually, it will be obvious soon enough."
Panic flared in Sam's eyes. "I can't..." she whispered.
"How are you going to explain it later then? He's got a brain; he'll be able to figure it out on his own then. Trust me, it's better to tell him now. No one else has to know just yet, but he does deserve to know."
"I don't know how to tell him. It's not like he asked for this." Sam's head dropped back to her pillows, staring at the ceiling. She was still unable to make eye contact with Janet.
"Neither did you. You don't have to do this alone, Sam. He's done this before, he can help you through it."
"I can't yet." She shook her head.
"All right, I won't push, but think on it. He has the right to know, and he does care. That is obvious to anyone who cares to pay attention."
Janet patted Sam's shoulder. "Get some more rest. Eat the banana. I'll have some soup brought in for you for lunch. Eat that and you can go home."
"Thanks." Carter finally looked over to her. "For everything."
"You're welcome, it's what friends are for. I'll be by tomorrow morning, we can talk more then."
With a silent nod of assent, Sam settled back into the small hospital bed, pulling the thin, course covers up over her. Her eyes slid shut as she easily slept into sleep.
Later that afternoon, a furiously grinning Jack flew into the infirmary, pushing a wheelchair in front of him. "Your ride." He grinned at Sam.
Sam shook her head with a matching smile. "If I wasn't afraid of falling flat on my face the moment my feet touched the ground..."
"I know, that's why I commandeered this puppy." He locked the brakes on the chair then stepped over to the bed. He placed a hand on Sam's shoulder, stopping her when she tried to slide off the bed. "Nope, no walking." He then picked her up.
Sam gave a small shriek as her arms went instinctively around his neck. A weak giggle escaped as well.
Jack looked into the face inches from his. Seeing the first real smile from her since he carried her through the gate, he smiled. It would be so easy to lean in closer for a kiss...
A chuckle from across the room brought him back to reality. He turned his head to see Janet watching them with an amused smile. "Careful with my patient, Colonel. I don't want to see her back in here due to a relapse.""I'll make sure that doesn't happen. She's going home and straight into bed. And then for the next several days, there are three of us who will make sure she stays there. Three willing slaves..." He gave Sam a wink.
"Oooh, every girl's dream," she teased back. Another chuckle from Janet earned the other woman a friendly glare from Carter. "Actually the first thing I want when I get home is a shower. I haven't had one for nearly four days."
"I noticed something seemed a little ripe... just didn't want to say anything," Jack kept up the banter. He settled into the wheelchair and dodged a weak playful swipe from Sam. Both seeming to forget they still had an audience.
Hearing full-fledged laughter this time, Jack looked up, a serious expression on his face. "How much weight did she lose because of this flu?"
The laughter ceased. "Too much." Fraiser's gaze locked on Sam. "She needs to start eating again, and real food. She needs that as much as she needs rest."
"I will," Carter promised. "I won't have much choice with the three of them hovering."
"We'll make sure she eats. I could feel your ribs when I picked you up, I know that can't be healthy."
"It isn't," Fraiser's tone was dead serious. "Sam knows what she has to do, and what will happen if she doesn't." Janet looked up at Jack. "Get her home. For the first couple of days, broths, light soups, crackers, butterless toast. Things which are easy to digest. Milk too. I've given her some vitamins to help, make sure she takes them. They're sitting on the kitchen counter at her place already. Once she starts keeping everything down without problems, we can then add to what she can eat."
"I'll have Daniel stop on the way over tonight and pick up what items Carter doesn't have in her kitchen." Jack moved to stand behind the chair, ready to push.
"That's most of what Janet listed. My kitchen was pretty bare, we were expecting to be gone for several days, didn't want anything to spoil." Sam settled back. "That all the instructions?"
"Yes, go home. I don't want to see you in here until your check up in a week." Janet gave them both a smile, then disappeared into her office."Home then, James," she ordered with a small smile.
"I think you're beginning to like this too much," Jack teased as he pushed her down the hall.
"Maybe," she softly giggled.
"We still need to work on that." He rested a hand on her shoulder as they stopped in front of the elevators. He leaned forward and pushed the button.
"Work on what?"
"That giggling." He grinned as he moved to stand where she could see him while they waited.
"Ahhh. Don't like giggling, Sir?" She coyly looked up at him.
"Didn't say that." His arms loosely crossed over his chest as he leaned against the wall.
Her eyes came up to lock on his. "Sorry for scaring you."
"You didn't mean to. I know for myself that you weren't running a fever that night. I should have kept a closer eye on you. We would have known when the fever hit and gotten you back here sooner if I had." Seeing the empty hallway, he knelt in front of the chair, taking her hands in his. "We both know better now."
The elevator arrived just as Jack was standing up again. Several people had to disembark before Jack could push the wheelchair into the waiting elevator. The long ride to the surface was done in relative silence. Even just sitting in the wheelchair was leaving Sam drained.
Once on the surface, Jack wheeled her directly to his car and helped her in, he then stowed the chair in the trunk before climbing into the driver's seat. "How are you doing?" He looked over at her, noting that she was quite pale again.
"Just get me to a bed, and try not to hit too many bumps along the way..." She leaned her head back on the headrest and closed her eyes.
"Right, nightclub and plenty of bumps..." he lightly teased before starting the car and heading off base towards her apartment.
"Funny, Sir..." Sam mumbled before drifting off to sleep.
Jack was lifting her out of the car before she woke up again. "I can get out on my own, Sir..."
"Sam, I know there's no way you'd make it up three flights of stairs to your place. I'm not about to let you try, you'd only end up back in the hospital. Enjoy this while you can, and the next time I'm hurt, you can return the favor if you want."
She smiled tiredly. "There's a picture..."
"You're the one who offered to arm wrestle to prove how tough you were." He pressed a kiss to her forehead.
"You never took me up on that." She rested her head on his shoulder.
Away from base finally, they were a little freer to show affection. Jack shut the car door with his foot, then proceeded up the stairs with her. He paused outside her door. "Think you can stand leaning against me while I unlock your door?"
"Yes. Need a key?" she asked as he slowly set her down. Her legs threatened to buckle as she leaned between him and the wall.
"No, Janet gave me hers." He got the door unlocked, then picked her up again. "You know, most women don't get this until their wedding night..." he teased as he carried her in.
A tired giggle slipped out; her head on his shoulder again.
"You can have that shower you wanted later. Right now it's nap time."
He carried her into the bedroom and laid her down on the bed. He slipped her shoes off. "Stay in your sweats?"
She nodded, her eyes barely open.
"I'll be in the living room if you need anything." He pulled the covers up over her.
Her hand reached out and caught his. "Stay..." she softly asked.
"You sure?"
She nodded again. He kicked off his own shoes and laid down on top of the covers. Sam immediately scooted over, resting her head on his chest. Within moments, she was sound asleep again. Jack loosely wrapped his arms around her, holding her close as she slept.
Sam's stirring a couple of hours later, woke Jack from the light doze he'd slipped into. He opened his eyes to find her looking up at him. He smiled down at her. "Could get used to this," he whispered.
A slight blush colored her cheeks as she slowly extracted herself from him. She settled onto her side, still looking at him. "Mean that?"
He reached out and cupped her cheek, his thumb lightly brushing along her cheek bone. "Yes."
She turned her head into his touch, eyes half lidded. She looked like a cat on the verge of purring. Unable to resist, Jack leaned down, brushing a light kiss over her lips.
He felt her lips instinctively part, and he leaned in closer, deepening the kiss at her unconscious invitation. The ringing of the telephone made them both jump.
"Let it ring," Sam said, sitting up. "Voice mail will get it." She pushed the covers back. "I need that shower..." she continued on, completely flustered.
Jack's hand came to rest on her shoulder. "Stay still, Sam. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that..." He stood up. "I'll run you a bath, you wouldn't last on your feet long enough for a shower, and while you're soaking I'll fix you some soup for dinner."
She covered her hand with his, looking up into his eyes. "Don't be sorry... you have no idea how badly I want where that might have led to... now's just not the right time..." She lifted his hand up and kissed his fingertips. "For now, that bath sounds like a dream."
"Stay here and I'll get it running, then I'll help you get in." He lightly ran his thumb over her lips, eyes locked on hers.
They sat like that for several long silent moments before Jack stood up and headed into the bathroom. Sam could hear the bath water running, then should could hear him opening the under the sink cupboard doors. She smiled, knowing what he was looking for. She slipped out from under the covers, coming to sit on the edge of the bed, waiting for him to return. She still felt weak and shaky, at least her stomach had remained calm that day, even after eating. She silently wondered how long that would last, she really didn't want to have to explain to Jack yet. She didn't know how to even start.
"Ready for that bath?" Jack asked, startling her from her thoughts.
"Found some bubble bath." He grinned at her.
"Thought I heard you looking for something. Watch it, or I might want to be pampered all of the time..." She started to stand up. He immediately moved closer to help her stand. She leaned gratefully against him.
"That wouldn't be all that bad a proposition." His arm slipped around her waist as he guided her into the bathroom. Once inside the steamy room, he helped her slip out of her clothes. Neither of them really thought about what he was doing, he'd already seen it all before, there was no longer room for embarrassment anymore. Jack gave her his arms to lean on as she stepped into the tub, then smiled as she sank down into the hot water with a sigh of pure pleasure. "Soak for a while, I'm going to go out and put a pot of soup on for you to eat, then I'll be back in. Just lay there and relax," he ordered. "Try not to fall asleep, I'm not in the mood for CPR today..." He gave her a smile then slipped out of the room.
Sam shook her head, then leaned her back, slipping deeper into the water. The heat seeping into her muscles felt wonderful. There was still some residual aches left from the flu. That and she felt sticky all over. She opened her eyes, looking for the bar of soap; she noticed that Jack had moved everything well out of her reach. "You really are going to spoil me..." she murmured to herself. A momentary twinge of guilt swept over her, Janet was right, he did deserve to know. But she wasn't ready to turn his world upside down, both of them didn't have to lose their jobs over this, and that's what would happen the moment he found out.
"Still awake?" Jack's voice once again interrupted her thoughts.
Sam opened her eyes to see him standing casually in the doorway, leaning up the jamb watching her with dark eyes. There was a softness to his face that wasn't there while they were on base. She couldn't associate love with that look, not yet, he'd yet to say anything about love. Except for Avalon, they'd yet to do anything beyond cuddling and the few stolen kisses they could get when no one was looking. She lifted her hand out of the water, holding it up to him in invitation.
He moved into the small bathroom, taking her hand, he kneeled by the tub. He gently kissed the palm. "Ready to get clean?"
"Yes. I'm about ready to melt, haven't been this relaxed in days."
"You're looking better. Might just be the warm water, but you've got some color back on your face. The white sheets in the infirmary had more color for a while." He reached for the soap and a washcloth. With a gentle practiced hand her started washing her, his touch not unlike that of a father with his child. It served only to relax her further. Her body finally cleaned, he reached over for the shower hose. He turned the water on and adjusted the water temperature. "Lean forward," he softly ordered. Sam did as he said, within moments, she felt the warm water coursing down her head, then just as quickly, it was gone. Water dripping down in front of her, she heard him reach for the shampoo. The vanilla scent quickly filled the bathroom as he started to wash her hair. Fingers massaged her scalp, then moved down to the back of her neck.
"Careful, or I'm going to start purring."
"Why should I be afraid of that?" he asked with a soft chuckle, continuing his work.
"Didn't say you should be..." her words trailed off as he started rinsing the shampoo out of her hair.
Jack reached up for the bottle of conditioner and repeated the process. "There, all clean. Let me grab a towel, then I'll help you out of the tub."
"Could you grab me a clean pair of sweats and a tee?" She looked up at him, pushing her short wet hair back, squeezing the excess liquid out.
O'Neill swallowed hard and nodded. "No problem." The sooner he got her dressed again, the better off they'd both be. He slipped out of the bathroom, then paused. He had no idea where Sam kept such things. He turned and popped his head into the bathroom again.
"Bottom left drawer in the dresser." She smiled, knowing what he needed.
He gave her a small mock salute, then went in search of the items once again. Locating his quarry, he went back into the bathroom. "Towels are in the small cupboard over the toilet." She pointed to the area as she talked.
Jack reached over and grabbed a towel, and set it on the sink with her clothes. "All right, time for you to get out of the water before you prune." He knelt down to help her stand up.
"Too late." She grinned as he wrapped a large towel around her.
An answering chuckle met her grin, as he pulled her into a hug, arms wrapping around her. She rested her head on his chest, soaking up the contact. "You should be getting back to bed. You've been up way too long." He pulled back several long moments later. He started drying her off.
"I'd rather lay out on the couch. Got the TV and fireplace out there." Her mind drifted as she continued to experience the more paternal side of Jack.
"Earth to Sam..." O'Neill waved a hand in front of her face several minutes later.
Carter blinked a couple of times as his grinning face came into focus. "Sorry..." she muttered.
"It's easier to help you dress if you're more cooperative. Couch is fine. The soup will be ready by the time I get you settled." He helped her into the sweats and T-shirt.
Leaning heavily against him, Sam slowly went into the living room. She gratefully collapsed onto the couch and closed her eyes. She smiled as she felt a blanket settle over her a moment later. "Thanks," she muttered, feeling sleep pulling at her.
"You're welcome. I'll have the soup out in a minute. I know Janet's going to call and check in on you. I want to be able to tell her you're being a good patient."
She nodded slightly, half asleep already.
"Then again," Jack whispered. He went into the kitchen and turned off the burner. The soup would reheat later. He then went back into the living room. He settled into the couch, setting her head in his lap as she sleep. Gently fingers lightly stroked through her hair.
==========================
The next two weeks crawled for Sam as she waited for Janet to clear her to come back to active duty. There was only so many times one could clean their apartment or watch the same movies. Her fellow team members would drop by on their days off, but just because she was out sick, didn't mean they got a vacation from work, as they reminded her each time they came by. Over the last week, they'd learned not to come empty handed. As she gotten over the flu and the nausea had ceased, her appetite had returned with a vengeance and with it cravings.
She sat on her couch, contemplating her living room, trying to decide if it was time to rearrange it or not. "Damn, I am so bored," she muttered getting up off the couch. Physically, she was bored, mentally she was waging a war with herself. There were risks involved with gate travel. They still didn't know if there would be any long term effects on the human body as a result. As much as she wanted to get back to work, an equal part of her was scared to go back out into the field. She glanced at the clock as she paced the living room. It was getting close to 1300 hours.
As if on cue, her stomach rumbled. She wandered into the kitchen looking for something to eat. The kitchen was still rather bare except for the year's supply of soups Daniel had bought.. "Perfect, a trip to the store will kill a few hours." Knowing her teammates habits over the last two weeks, she scribbled a quick note in case one of them dropped by. Grabbing her purse and car keys, she headed out the door.
Two hours later, balancing her groceries in one hand, and a Coney Island Dog with the works in the other, she tried to get her key into the lock. The door swung open to reveal a worried Jack. "Where have you been?" he asked as he grabbed the grocery bags from her. "You're supposed to be home resting." He started in on his lecture.
Sam raised a hand up, stopping him. "I went shopping, Old Mother Hubbard's cupboard's were bare. I wanted something more than soup. Didn't you see the note? I knew one of you would be showing up." She followed him into the kitchen. She pulled the dog out of the bag, unwrapping it she took a bite.
Jack sniffed the air, and turned around. He gave her a strange look as he saw what she was eating. "Wait a minute. I thought you didn't like hot dogs, or sauerkraut.." He stepped closer. "Relish, mustard, mayonnaise, ketchup, raw onions..." His eyebrows creased . "Is there anything you didn't get on that?"
"No, I was driving home when I passed the Coney Island stand. It sounded good, so I stopped and got one." She took another bite.
"Is your stomach ready for this? You're just getting over the flu."
He grimaced at the sight of everything on the hot dog. It was enough to make his stomach churn.
"It demanded it." She took another bite, then walked to the fridge, and grabbed the milk. Pouring herself a glass, she settled down at the table to finish her lunch.
"Are you always like this after being sick?" He sat down across from
her.
"Like what?" She looked up at him, her face a picture of innocence, hot dog in mid air.
"Eating weird things. You've always turned green at the mention of hot dogs before. Now you can't eat this one fast enough. Are you sure you're feeling okay?"
She chuckled softly. "Yeah, whenever I had the flu as a kid my dad could tell I was feeling better when I started craving chicken fried steak. Speaking of which that sounds good. Want to go out and get some for dinner?"
"It's three o'clock. You're going to be hungry for dinner once you finish that?" He pointed to the half eaten dog.
She nodded. "My appetite came back. Now my body seems to want to make up for lost time. So what do you say? You, me, dinner, my treat?" She grinned at him.
"Yes to all, but this will be my treat." He settled back and watched her finish the hot dog, wondering if he was going to have an appetite for dinner.
Three days later, a partially cleared and happy Sam made her way into the locker room at SGC. She quickly changed into her jumpsuit, then headed for the lab. She didn't want to think about the work that awaited her there. Nor did she want to think about the messes she was sure to have to clean up because someone tried to fix one of her toys.
She stopped short as she entered the lab. On her desk sat a huge bouquet of roses. "Welcome back!" Her grinning teammates stepped up beside her. Daniel placed a quick peck on one cheek, Teal'C gave an uncharacteristic brief hug. She turned to face Jack, unsure of what he'd do now that they were back on base and once again Colonel and Captain.He pulled her into a one armed hug. "It's good to have you back on board, Captain."
"It's good to finally be allowed back, Sir." She smiled. "What do you have for me to work on today?"
"Well, seeing as Doctor Fraiser hasn't cleared you for gate travel yet, you get to work on the samples we bring back. I also think they're wanting to do some upgrades to the probes. We're going to keep you busy even if you can't come with." The expression on his face told her more than his words did.
"Janet just wants to make sure I'm back to 100% before she'll let me back out. That means I need to completely regain the weight I'd lost. Once she's sure I am, she'll clear me for all duties..." Sam tried to explain, using the cover story she and Janet had concocted. She still couldn't tell him the truth, though she knew in another month she wouldn't be able to hide it anymore.
O'Neill nodded. "Fair enough. If you're ready, I think there are about ten samples waiting on your desk to be analyzed. In the mean time, Daniel, Teal'C and I have to report for a mission briefing. We'll be off world the rest of the day."
"Have fun and stay out of trouble," she couldn't help the teasing tone.
"Who us?" Jack gave her his most innocent expression.
It didn't work. "You forget, I know all of you too well." She called back with a chuckle. Carter made her way to her desk and settled in to try and get caught up after nearly three weeks away.
The beeping of her watch pulled Sam away from the botany sample she was cataloguing. With a sigh, she glanced at her watch. It was time for a checkup with Janet. They always scheduled them for a time when there wouldn't be many people around in the infirmary. The rest of SG-1 was off world again, and if it wasn't for her fears, she'd be itching to be with them. There were only so many samples a person could look at, and so many pieces of equipment she could modify before it got monotonous.
They had a lot to talk about at the appointment. She'd gotten to the point where her pants were tight, she'd almost not gotten them zipped up that morning. Thank goodness for the baggy overshirts. It was decision time, and it couldn't be put off any longer.
With a sigh, she slid off her stool, and headed towards the elevator. Her eyes took in the corridors as she walked. She loved this place. Loved the work they did here.
Her thoughts carried her into Fraiser's office. She knocked softly, then entered. "Reporting for required check up." She grinned at her friend. Janet glances at her watch. "You're late," she teased. Standing up, she walked around the desk.
"Only a minute. Had to wait for the elevator." She followed Janet out of the room and into an exam room.
"How have things been going?" Fraiser asked handing Sam a gown.
"So far so good. It's decision time..." Carter told her as she slipped into the gown, then hopped up on the table.
"Decision time?"
"Almost couldn't get my pants on this morning. Took some work." She sighed, then laid back.
Fraiser raised an eyebrow. "You are passed the secret stage now, Sam. Someone else is going to have to know. That and I can only keep you on restricted duty for so long without further explanation. General Hammond and Colonel O'Neill are both pushing to get you back onto missions."
Carter stared at the ceiling. "I know. That's where the decision comes into play. I'm applying for a transfer out. Was hoping you could provide the medical reason." She turned her head and looked over at her friend hopefully. "I checked with some friends, NASA would still be willing to have me. All I need to do is turn in the paperwork."
"Are you sure you want to do this?" Janet moved towards the head of the exam table. "If you told at least the General, he could keep you here."
"The questions will really be starting soon. And there are still some of them I'm not ready to answer. I don't know for sure why I don't want to tell him, I've come up with a hundred and one excuses, and that's what they are, excuses. There's just a part of me that doesn't want him to know, not yet."
"So you'll just transfer out, no reasons given. Never come back, never see him again? I've seen the two of you, remember? You're both too stubborn to admit you've actually fallen in love."
"It's more like we can't admit it. Regulations don't permit it. Hell, regulations don't permit any of this. He's happy here, this is where he belongs. If anyone should leave it should be me. What no one else knows won't get him in trouble. Please, I need you to do this." Sam begged her.
"Will he ever know?"
"I do hope to come back. After all, I do have friends here, and the only family I have on this planet are here. One way or the other, I will be back. And when I do, he'll no longer be my commanding officer. Only then will it be safe."
"You'll keep in contact?" Janet put on a pair of gloves.
"Yes." Sam settled back down as the check-up commenced. "You've got my private e-mail. For obvious reasons, that will be the best way to keep in touch."
Janet sighed softly, still not one hundred percent happy with Sam's decision, but she wasn't there to judge. "Then you don't want any of the guys to know where you end up I take it."
Sam's eyes met hers. "Yes. I don't need any surprises showing up on my doorstep."
"I can't guarantee they won't find out on their own." Janet moved away as she finished the examination. "Everything's looking good. I just want to get your weight before you leave and you're good to go for another two weeks. I wish you'd consider seeing someone in Colorado Springs. This really isn't my specialty."
"Going to an off base doctor would raise too many eyebrows. And with luck, in two weeks I'll already be in my new home."
"Think you will be?" Fraiser removed the gloves, and handed Sam her clothes back.
"All I need is your contribution. They're more than ready for me on the other end. Just following up on what my father tried to do for me..." She quickly slipped back into her clothes. "I've even started packing already," she admitted.
"You've been planning this for a while." Janet simply stated."Yes, one way or the other, I knew I had to get out of here. I had a couple of contingencies..."
"Are you sure you're not running away from this?" Fraiser finally asked.
"What?" Sam looked up at her in surprise.
"Running away. It's easier to up and leave rather than tell Jack and see what develops from there." Janet crossed her arms across her chest.
Sam spun around, facing down Janet. "I am NOT running away!"
"Then what do you call it? You're too afraid to tell Jack that you're turning tail and leaving before you have no choice but to tell him. He has a right to know, you're denying him the chance to be a father again. You're denying him his choice." Now that she was going, Janet got out everything she'd been thinking over the last four and a half months.
"You have no right to judge me. I've made my decision, I've weighed all the factors, and this is the best solution I could come up with. Jack's too important to this place, I'm more expendable. I'm doing this with or without your help." Sam spun on her heels again and stalked out of the room. She headed straight for her desk in the lab, pulling out a stack of papers hidden in a drawer. She then headed for General Hammond's office. Seeing as she wasn't about to get any support from Janet on this one, it was time for contingency number one.
===================================
The hockey game blared from the television as Jack settled back down onto his couch, beer in hand, popcorn in front of him. It had been a rough week and he was looking forward to an evening of Stanley Cup hockey. A knock on his door elicited a small groan from him. Heaving himself up from the couch, he silently cursed the uninvited guest.
Opening the door, he was surprised to see Carter standing on his doorstep. His eyes took in her body. She was dressed in a loose thigh length dress, hair was done up, and there was more makeup on than he usually saw on her. She was breathtaking.
"Just going to stare, or are you going to invite me in?" she asked in a low voice, a smile playing at her lips.
His eyes came up to meet hers. He was surprised at the passion and desire he saw reflected back in her deep blue eyes. "Come in..." He stepped back; allowing her entrance to his house.
As she walked passed him, she reached out for his hand, fingers twining with his. She waited until he'd closed the door before slipping in close to him. Her free hand went behind his neck, pulling him down into a passionate kiss.
It was several long minutes before either came up for air. "Wow..." Jack breathed out, his face still inches from hers. "To what do I owe this?"
"You've been gone most of this week. I was lonely..." Both arms came up around his neck, pulling him closer again.
"If I'd known what time apart would do, I'd have done it sooner..." He kissed the tip of her nose.
"When I heard you all were on stand down for a few days, I wanted to be with you tonight..." Her eyes met his, trying to see if he wanted this too.
"Tonight? As in all night?" he asked, hope filled his voice.
"If that's what you want, because it's what I want..." She pressed up closer to him.
The game completely forgotten, Jack's hands started roaming over her body as his lips covered hers in another deep kiss. One hand found the zipper on the back of her dress. Slowly working it down, hot fingers blazed a trail down the newly bared skin.
Shivers ran through Sam at the contact. She deepened the kiss, her hunger and passion coming through. She took a small step, forcing him backwards, in the general direction of his bedroom. Her hands were already working on removing his shirt, blazing their own trail over his skin.
She continued to push him back towards the bedroom. The shirt dropped to the floor as the still entwined couple stumbled into the room. Her lips left his, trailing down his jaw. Tasting, nibbling, teasing.Jack slipped her dress off her shoulders. Sam stepped out of it as they stepped closer to the bed. She kissed her way down his chest, teasing his nipples into small hard nubs before moving lower. Her tongue teased his belly button as her hands worked open his belt, then pants. They slid down, pooling at his ankles. He hitched in a breath as her tongue teased the area just above the waistband of his briefs.
A hand under her jaw stopped her from her intended target. Jack gently guided her up, lips meeting once again. Bare chest crushed into bare chest. Sam wrapped one of her legs around his, molding herself to him, hips grinding together. His hands once again roamed over her body as he moved once again towards the bed.
They broke apart briefly when they both made contact with the mattress. His hands lingered on her. "You've finally regained the weight you'd lost..." he whispered appreciatively.
"Shhhh..." She placed a finger on his lips. "No words..." Her lips then replaced her finger, gently caressing against his. Her arms slipped around his neck as she laid back, pulling him down with her.
The last remaining vestiges of clothing were quickly discarded. Sam pushed him onto his back, straddling him, taking him deep with in her. Her eyes slid closed as a low moan slipped passed her lips. Slowly, she started rocking, loving the feel or him within her; loving the control she had.Jack slid his hands to her waist, eyes open, he watched the pleasure build on her face. She was so beautiful at that moment. He felt her muscles tightening around him, his own eyes closed at the pleasure that flooded through him. He felt the tiny tremors coursing through her body as they grew stronger. Together, they plummeted head first into a twin release.He opened his eyes he felt her weight settle on his chest, her lips pressed a gentle kiss into the side of his neck. Within moments, he felt her breathing slow down. The soft sigh just below his ear let him know she'd fallen asleep.
He slipped his arms around her, holding her close as he allowed sleep to pull him down as well.
With a low moan, Jack reached across the bed in his sleep. His eyes came open as he encountered an empty mattress. "Sam?" he mumbled, his mind quickly wondering if it had all been a dream. He looked around the room, seeing her dress laying on the floor near the doorway, he knew it hadn't been.He pushed the covers back and grabbed his briefs from where they lay.
Slipping them on, he padded from the bedroom, looking for Sam. He found her on the couch in his living room. She'd slipped on one of his T-shirts. It covered her, but still managed to leave little to the imagination. A half eaten sandwich sat on a plate in her lap.
He spotted a small glob of something white and red laying on the plate. "Woke up hungry?" He asked with a smile as he sat down.
"Yes. Raided your kitchen. You didn't have a whole lot in there." She returned the smile.
"So what did you end up with?" He eyed the sandwich again.
"Cheese and mayo with strawberry jam, on rye bread," she automatically answered, then picked up the sandwich, and took a bite.
Jack swallowed past the nausea he felt building in his stomach. The feeling grew worse as he saw her reach for a previously unnoticed jar of pickles on the coffee table. She dipped it into the mixture on the plate.
"Sam? What did you just dip that into?" he warily asked, not sure if he wanted to know the answer.
"Ketchup and mayo." She shrugged as if her entire meal was the most natural thing in the world.
"Are you feeling okay?" he asked, his face taking on a decidedly green hue in the dim light.
"I feel great. Now that I've had a snack, I feel even better." She finished off the sandwich in two quick bites.
"How long have you liked this type of sandwich?" He leaned back, settling back against the couch, dark eyes regarding her.
"This was my first one. Wasn't too bad actually." She set the plate down on the table, then pulled her knees up as she got more comfortable on the couch. "Did I wake you?"
"Not really. Woke up when I realized the bed was empty." He reached across the couch, gentle fingers caressed her cheek. "Was afraid I'd been dreaming." He searched her face, there was something in her eyes. He searched deeper. She was guarding something, he could feel it. He could see a near desperation in the deep blue eyes in front of him. "Is everything okay, Sam?"
She moved in closer, snuggling up against him, head resting in the crook of his shoulder. "Just fine," she sighed out. Her hand came up, lightly caressing his chest, fingers running over the course hair there. "You know you can talk to me, Sam, tell me anything," he whispered, placing a kiss on the top of her head.
She moved again, settling over him, she straddled his lap. "Not tonight." She placed a finger on his lips, once again silencing him. "No words tonight, only feelings..."
Jack kissed the finger on his lips, then captured her wrist with his hand. Kissing the finger again, he worked his way up her hand and arm with soft kisses, pulling her in closer. He shifted position, laying her back down on the couch. Hands slipped under the T-shirt, moving it slowly up and off. He leaned down, lips capturing one already taut nipple, a hand moved to the other breast, giving it equal attention.
Her head went back, mouth partially opened as she moaned in response to his attention. Her hands came up, holding his head in place, fingers tangling in his short hair. A small portion of his mind noted that she had indeed been gaining weight. He could no longer feel her ribs as his hands stroked over her chest, her breasts were fuller. He liked the changes he felt, made her softer to the touch, though on the inside, she was still the tough as nails Sam he'd fallen in love with.
Jack suddenly raised his head. Eyes blinking. Fallen in love. *When did that happen?* he thought to himself, looking down at her face. *Face it, Jack, it happened a long time ago. You were just too stubborn to admit it. And too damn scared to admit it out loud to her...* He gave her a soft smile, when her eyes opened and her head came down to look at him. "Just admiring," he whispered as a cover, moving up to kiss her deeply.
Her arms around him tightened as the kiss grew deeper, almost desperate. Tongues dueled for domination, each wanting to possess the other. Hands explored and aroused, knowing now what the other liked. Sam hooked her fingers in the waistband of his briefs, wanting nothing between them once again. His hands moved to cover hers, stopping the motion.
"Bedroom," Jack whispered canting his head in that direction.. "More room."
Eyes bright, she nodded.
Jack slid off the couch, then held a hand out to her, leading her into the other room. He sat down on the edge of the bed, pulling her close for another kiss. Arms wrapped around her waist. With a grin, she pushed him back onto the bed, and once again straddled him. With a sudden twist, she ended up on bottom. "My turn," he whispered.
His lips trailed over her face and neck, hands once again caressing. He felt her legs wrap around him, a strong vise around his hips, holding him close. He slowly moved his hips into hers. He was met with an answering grind and a whimper.
"Please..." she whispered, legs clenching tighter around him. Her chest heaved as her breathing grew more erratic as passion over took her completely. Jack pulled back only far enough to slip the briefs off. Settling back over her, he began a calculated penetration, moving slowly at first. Drawing out the pleasure for both of them. His movements picked up speed at her urging, his own body demanding more.
Their cries blended as they once again found their release together. Sated, O'Neill rolled onto his side, pulling her against him as they both recovered. He felt her head settle onto his chest. He pressed a soft kiss onto the top of her blonde hair. He felt sleep quickly pulling him down. Falling head first into the oblivion of sleep, he muttered one last thought.
"Love you..."
Sam's eyes flew open at the whispered words. She'd been so close to sleep herself. Comfortable, warm, sated, and most of all she felt safe. Until those words. Two words shattered the illusion she'd set up for herself that night. Shed intended to stay the night, slipping out before first light and before her woke. Now, she knew she couldn't stay. She had to get out of there. Had to leave before he woke up again and saw the raw pain and fear in her eyes.
It had been so hard hiding those emotions from him all night. Listening to his breathing, she waited until she was certain he was in a deep sleep. Gently and slowly, she extricated herself from his embrace. Dressing, her eyes lingered on his sleeping form. Memorizing his features. Dressed, she walked over to the bed and placed a kiss on his sleep parted lips. With one last glance at him, she slipped out of the bedroom, then out of his house.
==========================
Sunlight streaming through the windows woke Jack the next morning. He automatically reached out for his bed partner. He cracked one eye open when he encountered cold, empty sheets. "Sam?" he called out. The house remained silent. He climbed out of the bed and went looking through his house. It was empty, no sign that Sam had even been there the night before.
He tried calling her. There was no answer, his call went straight through to her voice mail. He hung up without leaving a message. Quickly dressing, he decided the best course of action would be to go to her apartment to talk to her.
Arriving at her apartment, he found the spaces in front of her building were blocked by a moving truck. The only other space available was a few buildings away. He nearly ran into two movers carrying a large couch. Muttering an apology, he quickly moved passed them and headed up the stairs to her floor.
The door to her apartment stood wide open. Jack could see a small child of about three running around the empty living room. Jack stared in shock at the tableau in front of him.
"Excuse me. This couch is heavy and we'd like to have these people moved in sometime this century," one of the movers snapped at him as he stood blocking the door.
"Sorry," he muttered moving away, heading back down the stairs. He was opening his car door when his pager went off. Looking at the number, he recognized the one for SGC. With a sigh, he climbed into his car and headed for the base. He knew why they were being called in on their day off.
===============================
"Have a seat, Captain Cater," General Ryan Soffit ordered without looking up from the paperwork in front of him. He heard her feet moving against the floor as she made her way to the chair. He looked up in time to see her awkwardly maneuver herself into the chair with a sigh. She'd gotten so big this last month that half the time she looked like she was about to topple over face first.
A fond smile played over Ryan's lips. He'd known Sam since she'd been a headstrong three year old and he'd been an Airman under her father's command. When he'd gotten the call five months ago, there hadn't been much thought involved in him accepting her transfer to his command.
What he hadn't been expecting was for her to report for duty being nearly five months pregnant, and obviously running from something. He'd never asked her for any detail, and she'd never offered any up. He owed his life to Jacob Carter many times over, so taking Sam under his wing and helping her was a way of repaying the family back.
Carter had become a frequent visitor to his house, his wife taking the younger woman under her wings as well. Andrea was in her prime, helping Sam out as the pregnancy had progressed. He'd even become a father figure to her. They'd adopted another child over the last few months. And this baby would be another grandchild to them.
"What can I do for you, Captain Carter?" he finally asked when she was settled as comfortably as she could get.
She nervously looked up at him. "I need to transfer back to my previous assignment."
Surprise settled on his face. "You sure?"
"Yes, Sir. It's time I went back."
"I've made a point not to ask, because you haven't seemed to be open to discussing it, but does this have anything to do with the father?"
"Yes and no. He's there, but he's not really the reason I want to go back. I need to get back to Colorado before I have this baby."
Ryan searched her face, her expression was unreadable. He stood up and walked around his desk, coming to kneel in front of her. "Sam, this is your friend talking here, not your commanding officer. Are you completely sure about this? No one's forcing you to request a transfer?"
"This is my decision, Sir. Yes, the baby's father is there. And yes, he will be finding out... I never told him. My friends are all back there as well."
Ryan searched her face for several more moments. Satisfied that she wasn't being coerced, he finally nodded. "I'll put through the paperwork. We're going to miss you around here, Captain."
"I'm going to miss you too, Sir."
"Come by for dinner tonight. Andrea will be upset if you didn't say good-bye." He settled back down at his desk.
"I wouldn't dream of leaving without doing that. You both have done so much for me."
"You're family, Sam. You have been since you were a small child."
Sam smiled softly. "You made a good horsey, Sir."
Ryan chuckled. "It was because of you I nearly decided not to have kids. Seeing all the trips your father made to the emergency room with you and your brother."
"Some things never change," Sam sighed.
"I know for a fact you haven't been to the ER once in the four months you've been here."
"That's only because I'm already over at the hospital every week." With a grunt, she got herself ungracefully up from the chair.
"You'll call us the moment you have the baby? If I know Andrea, she'll want to come out there and be with you after the birth."
Sam smiled. "Of course, and I'd be happy to see her. Lord knows I'll probably need all the help I can get."
"Take care of yourself, Sam, and if you ever need anything, call. Anytime of day or night."
"I will, Sir. Once again, thank you for everything."
"It's been my pleasure. Dismissed, Captain." Ryan turned his attention back to the paperwork before him.
With a salute, Sam waddled out of the office.
==============================
It was well after midnight, Jack prowled the halls of SGC a dark cloud followed him everywhere he went. He rarely slept through the night anymore, and even more rarely left the base to go to his house. Too many memories assaulted him everytime he went home. It was safer here, a different set of memories existed in these halls, easier to deal with.
They were due to be at a debriefing at 0800 hours, just Teal'C, Daniel, and himself. In the past four months they'd gone through five of Sam's replacements. Sam... the more he tried not to think about her, the more she was on his mind. He'd tried finding her, but it was like she'd disappeared off the face of the earth. They all knew that wasn't the case though. He'd even confronted Fraiser, but she'd been unable to tell him anything. She was hiding something, that much he knew, but he also knew she had no idea where Sam was.
The longer Carter was gone, the darker his mood grew. His remaining team members had learned how to just let his dark mood and comments roll off of them. He knew though, that they and Hammond would only take so much more from him... If only he could find her.
A noise from the gate room drew his attention as he stalked passed. Instantly alert, he opened the armory stationed by the door and drew out a weapon. He could hear the gate turning now. Someone was dialing out and the alarms weren't going off. Whoever this was was good. They were also extremely dangerous. He slipped into the room, gun at the ready, just as the gate activated. The glimmering surface provided the only light in the dark room. He saw a lone figure standing at the base of the ramp.
"Don't move a muscle, don't even breathe!" Jack snarled stepping further into the room. The figure stiffened. "Slowly turn around. Keep your hands where I can see them."
Slowly, they turned around. His breath caught in his throat as the face that had been haunting his every moment for the past four months suddenly appeared before him.
"Sam?" He choked out, his arms wavering in their position.
"Colonel..." Pain and fear filled her voice.
Jack finally registered her entire figure. His eyes widened as he saw her condition. "Sam?" he asked again, blinking. His mind quickly reeling, realization setting in.
A sharp gasp and a grimace from Carter drew him back to the current situation. She clutched at her abdomen with one hand, her back with another.Jack stepped back over to the door and hit the light switch and a small button located near the switch. Alarms suddenly filled the compound. He rushed over to the ramp, wrapping his arms around her, leading her off of it.
Within moments, the room was filled with armed security personnel. General Hammond and Janet Fraiser were right behind them. Both froze when they saw who was in Jack's arms.
"Doc, she's in labor..." Jack gently led Sam over to her.
Fraiser flew into complete doctor mode. Barking orders, she had Sam quickly whisked from the room. Seconds after they'd left, Daniel and Teal'C flew in.
"What's going on?" Daniel panted out.
"Sam's back," Jack yelled back as he too took off out of the room. He didn't bother to see if the others were following or not. He just knew they'd be right behind him.
The four men arrived at the infirmary skidding to a halt in front of the closed doors. Guarding the doors was one of the nurses. "Doctor Fraiser said no one could enter unless it's a life threatening emergency until she gives the okay."
"It would take more men than this base has to keep me out of there," Jack growled, pushing his way passed the nurse.
"Colonel O'Neill!" Hammond barked his name out.
Jack turned and looked the general in the eyes. "Explanations can come later, Sir. Right now, I'm ninety-nine point ninety-nine percent sure that that baby is mine. And until I hear otherwise, I'm going to be in there with her." He spun around on his heel and went into the infirmary, missing two gape-jawed looks.
Teal'C merely gave a nod, a small smile briefly tugged at his lips.
Jack stalked through the room towards a smaller room in the back where he could hear Janet's and Sam's voices. His mind reeling at what had to be the truth. Why the hell hadn't she told him? A thousand emotions flooded through him as he walked into the room. Carter was already in the hospital bed, standard gown on in place of the clothes she'd been wearing when he'd found her. She looked rather depressed.
"Colonel O'Neill, I thought I said no one was allowed back here," Fraiser's voice cut through his thoughts.
He turned to look at her, glaring. "I'm not an idiot, Doctor. Unless, Sam can look me in the eye and tell me this baby isn't mine, then I'm staying."
Janet looked between the two people in the room. Carter had paled at Jack's words. Depression, fear, guilt, and pain all battled to be the primary emotion on her face. Jack, on the other hand, though he looked calm on the outside, Janet could sense an underlying current of anger and betrayal. She knew this would happen. This was why she'd tried to get Sam to tell him from the start.
Carter spoke next. "Janet, can we have a few minutes?" she asked in a low voice.
Janet nodded. She paused in front of Jack before leaving. "Try not to make her anymore upset than she already is. Her blood pressure is high enough already," she whispered to him, then slipped out the door. She stayed close, just in case.
Jack moved to stand next to the bed. His hands came up to tightly grip the rails. He looked down at Sam, taking a few deep breaths to try and calm himself. He'd never seen Carter look so vulnerable before. He'd never seen fear like this before on her face. She was afraid of him, he realized."Sam?" He gently asked, trying to get her to look at him again. Her head slowly turned, her eyes meeting his. "Why?"
Her eyes closed for a minute as she fought back the tears she felt threatening to fall. *Damn, hormones,* she thought. Opening her eyes again, she took a deep breath. "I didn't want to cause any trouble. Our relationship then was completely against regulations... this place needed you too badly..."
He reached down and took her hand in his. "We needed you. I needed you. I could have been there for you, you didn't have to do this alone. You shouldn't have gone through this alone..." He brought her hand up and kissed the palm. "A baby isn't something to be ashamed of..."
"I was never ashamed. Afraid, yes, ashamed no. You didn't ask for this..."
"And you did? Sam, we were both there that night. Neither of us was in control. You didn't seduce me and I didn't seduce you. It happened. I thought we had something..." He briefly let got of her hand, and lowered the rail. Perching on the edge of the small bed, he took her hand again. He looked over at the monitor showing the baby's heartbeat.
Sam followed his gaze. "Memories?" she softly asked.
He turned his gaze back to her. "Yes, and making some new ones." He quietly watched her for a moment. "Marry me?"
Her eyes went wide. She tried to pull her hand away as she struggled to sit up more. "What?"
He reached out and gently touched her cheek. "Will you marry me, Samantha Carter?"
Her breath caught in her throat. "Because of this?" she finally asked.
"Because I love you. This is just a nice bonus."
She searched his face, she didn't want him offering out of a sense of responsibility. She saw nothing but love written on his face. Love and excitement.
Jack watched the emotions flood across her face. Some were unreadable. He couldn't tell which way she was going. He didn't want to push her into an answer, knowing how well she'd respond to that. He leaned forward slightly as it looked like she was about to give an answer.
"Out, Colonel. Now!" Fraiser gripped his arm and removed him from the room. "I told you not to upset her and you did just that. You can wait outside with the others."
"I have a right to be in there," he tried to argue to no avail.
"Not if you're upsetting my patient. Don't fight me on this one." She pushed him out the door and into the hallway.
As the door slammed shut behind him, Jack looked up to see three pairs of questioning eyes looking at him.
==========================
"Colonel O'Neill, we need to have a talk." Hammond stepped forward first.
"Yes, Sir. Can we do it out here. I don't want to go too far."
"I don't have a problem with that. Care to explain?" The older man canted his head towards the now closed doors.
"As much as I can. I didn't know she was pregnant until tonight. There was an entire night left out of our report's for Avalon. Daniel and Teal'C don't even know what happened. It seems Captain Carter and I was chosen to represent their gods on the planet. And we just happened to come through the gate on the eve of their fertility festival."
"So that's where you both disappeared to. You and Sam were the Goddess and the Stag. This mirrors the Arthurian tales here on earth," Daniel excitedly interrupted.
"Yes, Daniel. Neither of us knew who the other was until the next morning. They'd drugged us using a wine."
"So this baby is the direct result of that one night?" Hammond asked.
"Yes, Sir." Jack uncomfortably shifted his weight.
"Anything else you'd care to get off your chest, Colonel?"
"I've asked her to marry me, Sir." Jack looked up at the three men standing closely together in front of him.
"The honorable thing?"
"No. I love her, Sir, I knew that before she left," he admitted.
"You and Captain Carter were in a relationship while she was under your command?" Hammond sighed, rubbing his temples at the headache building there.
"Not really, Sir. Up until the night she left, we were more friends. And the night she left doesn't count as she had already transferred out of SGC."
"Good, then there's nothing to report to anyone. How is Captain Carter doing?"
"Doc said her blood pressure was a little high. That's why I got kicked out before Sam gave me an answer." He glanced at the door. "I should be in there..."
The words had no sooner left his mouth when a scream came from within the infirmary. The blood drained from his face as he flew back in.
A considerably more uncomfortable Sam lay panting on the bed as Jack tore back into the room, nearly running into Janet. "I thought I told you to stay out," she snapped at him. "I'll put a guard on that door if I have to."
She grabbed his arm to lead him back out.
"Janet..." Sam called out. "Let him stay... I want him here..." Pain laced her voice. She grimaced as another contraction hit.
"Is she okay?" Jack spun Fraiser around to face him. "We heard her scream in the hall."
"It was just a strong contraction that took her by surprise. She's okay. Her labor's progressing a little slowly, but she's all right." She almost smiled at the nervousness she read in his face. It was like he was a first time father.
"Thanks..." He let her go and went over to the bed, taking one of Sam's hands in his again. With the other, he brushed the hair that had fallen into her face from her bangs. "Doing okay?" he gently asked her.
"For a first timer... yeah. I'd been told this hurt.. but I didn't know it hurt this bad..." She squeezed the hand that held hers. Her eyes locked on his. "Yes, Jack..."
"What?" His browns creased together in confusion.
"Yes, I'll marry you."
A huge grin covered his face, lighting his eyes. "Really?"
"Yes. I want..." The rest of her sentence was cut off as another strong contraction hit. Her other hand came over, grabbing his. She squeezed down on his one hand with both of hers as she tried to ride out the contraction.
"Breathe, Sam..." Fraiser ordered, stepping back up to the bed.The sound of a loud crunch filled the room, followed by a groan of pain from Jack. Sam collapsed back on the bed, panting for breath again as the contraction ran its course. O'Neill spun away from the bed, cradling his hand with the other.
"Jack, go have someone look at that now. Get an x-ray and don't bother arguing."
"Wouldn't dream of it..." The sarcasm he was trying for was lost in the pain which filled his voice. He slipped out of the room, looking for the other doctor on duty.
=============================
It was over an hour later before they'd x-rayed and set his hand. In that time he'd tried to go running into Sam's room almost every other minute. Each one of her cries of pain wrenched at his heart. Fraiser had come out at one point to reassure him that everything was progressing normally. A little slowly still, but normally.
Finally released by the sadist who'd been holding him captive, Jack headed straight back into the other room. He was halfway to the side of her bed when a barrage of words bad enough to make a sailor blush flew at him from the bed. He stopped dead in his tracks, eyes wide as he stared at Sam.
Janet chuckled. "I'd say she's been hanging out with too many Marines..." She briefly looked up at him.
"Where'd Sam go?" he muttered, still stunned.
"She's not having the easiest time of it here, Jack. She's in the middle of a pretty intense labor, has been for the last several hours. I found out while you were gone, the first contractions started about three yesterday evening. It's now three am. You do the math. She's also still not fully dilated, and to make matters worse, I'm really not set up for this sort of thing here."
Sam gritted her teeth as yet another wave of pain ripped through her.
Jack could hear her muttering. He winced as he made out the words castration and dull knife.
"Spoon's more painful," Janet helped Sam out with a grin.
The comment earned her a glare from O'Neill. "Whose side are you on anyways?"
"Women's everywhere. You got to have the fun and Sam's doing all the work."
"Could have done more to help out if I'd known..." he muttered. With his good hand, he reached down for one of Sam's again. He wasn't going to move from that bedside again if he could help it, if she broke this hand, he'd live with it until the baby was born. Looking down, he missed the flash of guilt that flew across Carter's face.
Janet watched the entire exchange with a sigh. Before these two even tried to get married, they had a few issues to work out. She shook her head and tried to change the subject. "Sam, let's try changing your position. There are a few other ways that are supposed to make delivery easier..."
"Anything... drugs would be nice too. Lot's of them..." Fraiser and Jack helped Sam lean forward, then Janet raised the head of the bed up completely.
"Haven't done this since my OB rotation in college," Janet muttered to herself. "Okay, Sam," she continued in a louder voice. "Turn around. Kneel and lean forward on the bed. You can scream into the mattress if you want, you can punch Jack's lights out..."
The last earned a chuckle from Sam. "Been envisioning just that for the last several hours..." She hitched a breath as another of the now seemingly endless contractions hit. She rested her forehead on the mattress, fingers clutching at it. She felt Jack's hand on her back, massaging. For a few moments it actually felt good, then it started to feel like he was pressing hot pins into her skin.
"Don't touch me," she snapped.
Jack snatched his hand back like he'd been burned. He definitely didn't remember any of this from when Charlie had been born. "Sorry... you need to breathe when they hit, Sam. I remember that much..." He leaned in close, talking to her.
"Colonel.." she gasped out a minute later.
Jack, blinked, taken aback that she'd used his rank rather than name.
"Yes?"
"Shut the fuck up," she snapped again. "Right now your voice is the most annoying thing in the world!"
Jack blinked again, in shock this time, his mouth hanging partially open.
"Jack, why don't you go out for a minute and let the others know how Sam's doing," Fraiser offered. "Maybe grab some coffee..." She led him out of the room. Once they were in the main part of the infirmary, she placed a hand on his shoulder. "This is all normal, Jack. Some women have an easier time of it than others. Don't take any of it personally, she'll be back to the Sam we know when this is over."
"Thanks. I'll be back in a few minutes. Give us both some breathing space..." He numbly made his way to the main doors.
"Jack? Colonel? O'Neill?" Three questioning voices greeted him the moment he stepped into the hallway.
He looked up at their faces. "Not yet. The most excitement so far was Sam breaking my hand, and her dialogue..."
Hammond gave a chuckle. "Colorful?"
"To say the least." Jack shook his head. "I need a cup of coffee..."
Daniel stepped up beside him. "Let's go get one. I'm sure General Hammond or Teal'C can come get us if anything happens."
The other two men nodded. O'Neill looked like he was ready to collapse where he stood. Daniel started to lead him towards the mess, when Jack suddenly pulled to a halt. "We need to try and reach her father. He'd want to know..."
"I'll handle that, Colonel, go get that coffee," Hammond ordered.
"Thank you, Sir." Jack finally allowed Daniel to lead him away.
Jack and Daniel had just sat down with their cups off coffee when a young airman came into the room. "Colonel O'Neill, Sir, Doctor Fraiser says you need to get back," the young man panted out. He watched, wide eyed, as the chair Jack had been sitting in flew back several feet as the older man bolted from the room, Jackson hot on his heels.
O'Neill made it back into the infirmary in record time from the mess, panic written all over his face as he flew into the room. "Sam?"
"She's okay, Jack. I just thought you might want to be here to greet the baby who's decided it's time to make an appearance."
Sam was still turned around, kneeling on the bed. She was once again tightly grasping at the mattress, a nurse stood next to her, helping to support her. Fraiser and another nurse were towards the foot of the bed, coaching Carter. Jack stepped up and took her place. He gently touched Sam's back. "Is it okay to talk or touch?" he gently asked.
She nodded her head with a sob, he could feel her trembling under his touch. Leaning in closer, he wrapped his arm around her back, lips inches from her ear. "It's okay, you're almost there..." he whispered to her.
"...can't..." came her muffled reply from the mattress.
"You can... you've never quit before, Sam Carter, you're not about to start now. Just a few more minutes and you'll be holding our baby. Trust me, when you see them for the first time, all this is worth it." He whispered to her as Janet continued to coach her through the final stages of delivery.
She gave a strangled cry as the baby finally slid out into Fraiser's waiting hands. The baby's first cries coincided with Janet's, "It's a boy!" announcement. Jack pressed a gentle kiss to her sweat matted hair, a grin already tugging at his lips. "Knew you could do it... Thank you..." he
whispered to her again.
Sobs of relief shook her body as he held her, still clutching the bed in front of her. The emotions she'd been holding in for the entire pregnancy flooding out.
"Shhhhhh..." He held her as close as he could given the awkward position they were in. His uncasted hand stroked over her hair.He felt a gentle hand on one shoulder. Looking up, he saw Fraiser standing next to him. "Why don't you go out and tell the others. I'm sure they're climbing the walls by now. That will give us a few minutes to get her and the baby cleaned up, then you can come back in and stay for as long as you want."
"That's going to be for all eternity, Doc. Now that she's back, she's never getting away again..." A huge grin suddenly lit his entire face. "A son..." he said, pulling her into a quick hug. "Thanks, Doc..." Releasing her as quickly as he'd pulled her into the uncharacteristic embrace, he headed for the door.
Fraiser watched him, she would swear he was actually strutting. Chest puffed out, peacock strut. She chuckled with a shake of her head, then turned her attention back to her patient.
===============================
A still grinning O'Neill burst out of the infirmary, he walked up to his three friends and pulled each of them into a hug. "A son..." he announced, the grin growing impossibly larger. A round of back patting and arm swatting progressed, congratulations filled the hallway.
"I'd pass out cigars if I had any... I'll have to pick some up later... Shit..." His eyes grew wide. "We need a nursery... Did you get a hold of her dad?" His mind flew in a thousand different directions at once.
"Whoa! Jack!" Daniel waved a hand in front of his face. "Her dad should be on his way, we sent the message. Teal'C and I can help you set up a nursery or two."
"Two?" Jack paused, looking up. He smiled for a second. "She said yes..." His face fell. "But did she mean it?" He glanced back at the doors, suddenly feeling very unsure.
Hammond, Daniel, and Teal'C could only watch as a now silent Jack went back into the infirmary. They stepped up to the doors and watched him head into the back room.
Eyes dark, and expression serious, a now subdued O'Neill stepped up to the bed. Cleaned up and in a fresh gown, Sam sat up, holding their son. A soft maternal look blanketed her face as fingers gently caressed the baby's face. He'd seen glimpses of that look in the past, he'd never dreamed he'd see that look sent to his... their son.
She finally looked up at him, a smile on her face. Even looking as exhausted as she did, she was still the most beautiful woman in the world to him. "You were right..." she told him in an awe-filled whisper.
"About what?" He perched on the edge of the bed.
"This was worth every second of it."
Jack got his first good look at their son. A fine mat of sandy hair covered his small head. "I think he's going to look a lot like you..."
Sam shook her head. "He's already got your nose and jaw. And the blue eyes he has now will likely be dark brown when he's older."
Jack leaned forward, and dropped a kiss on top of the baby's head.
Still leaning in, he lifted his head to look in Sam's eyes. "Did you mean what you said earlier?"
"About the castration?" Sam smiled, eyes twinkling softly. "That's still an option..."
Jack smiled despite himself. "No, not about that. I want to spend the rest on my life with you and our son, and any other kids we may have. Will you marry me, Samantha?" He asked for the third time that day. One hand came up and gently covered hers where it rested on the baby.
She leaned towards him, closing the small distance between their faces and gave him a soft kiss. "Meant it earlier, still mean it now... Yes. I was a fool to leave, Jack. But I did it because I didn't want to be the reason you lost this job. I loved you too much to do that. You love what you do here, and you're an important part of SGC. I know we're probably in trouble now that the cat's out of the bag so to speak, but I'll resign if I have to..."
"Shhhh." He placed a finger over her lips. "Hammond and I have already talked. We're not in trouble. You don't have to leave here either. We can't be on the same team, but we can both be here. You're on maternity leave for a few weeks anyways... we can decide what will happen when you come back. In the mean time, we have a wedding to plan and a son who needs a name."
"I hadn't really given a name much thought," she admitted, looking down at the baby. "But now that he's here, there's only one that seems to fit him... if you don't mind..."
"What is it?"
"Jacob, after my father."
"I don't have any objections to that. But he needs a middle name... and I get that one... and like you said, there's only one that will fit. I want to name him after the strongest person I know..."
"Jacob Jack just doesn't fit..." she teased with a smile.
"No, but Jacob Samuel does." He leaned back in again, kissing her, letting his love for her come through that single contact.
"It is a fine name indeed. A worthy one for my grandson."
O'Neill and Sam pulled back at the same time. The baby gave a small whimper at being jostled, but didn't wake. Jack stood up off the bed. "Sir," he greeted.
"Dad." Sam gave her father a smile in greeting.
"Sam..." Jacob moved in and gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.
"Let me see him..." He reached over and gently took the baby from her. "He's perfect and his name does fit him." He placed a kiss on his namesake's forehead, then handed him back to Sam. A sadness settled over his face. "My baby's got one of her own..."
A blush settled on Carter's cheeks. "Dad..."
"Hush, I'm still in shock over the idea I'm a grandfather. Let me have this moment." His eyes ran over her, taking in her appearance. "You look tired. We should let you rest, Sam." He leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead.
"I feel like I could sleep for the next week," she admitted. "Getting shot hurts less..."
"Sleep, baby. We'll be by later after I've gotten Colonel O'Neill to eat and sleep, and after we've had a talk." Jacob smiled at her.
"One piece, dad... can't get married otherwise..." Her eyes slid shut as sleep overtook her.
Jack was there in a heartbeat, taking the baby from her arms, holding him for the first time. His eyes were instantly glued to the small bundle in his arms. He still couldn't believe he was a father again. He was afraid to wake up from what had to be a dream.
A fond smile settled on Jacob's lips as he watched Jack with the baby. He could see the love O'Neill had for both of them. He knew they'd be in good hands when he went back. His daughter had chosen well.
Janet came back into the room. "Jack, I need to take the baby, and you look like you're dead on your feet. Go to your quarters, rest for a while. Both Sam and..." she paused. "Does he have a name yet?"
"Jacob Samuel..." came the automatic response, Jack's eyes never left his son.
"Both Sam and Jacob need to rest as well. They'll both sleep for the next couple of hours. You should do the same."
He reluctantly handed Jacob over to her. He winced slightly when he moved the fingers of his broken hand in the wrong way. The elder Jacob eyed the cast. "What happened?" He nodded towards O'Neill's hand.
"Sam has quite a grip when she's in pain."
That got a chuckle out of the older man. "Sleep or talk first?" he asked as he and O'Neill left the infirmary.
"Talk. I'll need some coffee while we do, my last cup got interrupted." He rubbed a hand over his eyes. The adrenaline of the night quickly wearing off, his body was letting him know how tired he was."Fair enough." He led the way into a now fuller mess, the rest of the base was now active.
Jack glanced at a clock it was now after 0800 hours. "This has to have been the longest night of my life," he said as he sat down.
"I felt the same way the night Sam was born. They didn't allow fathers into the delivery room back then. I was a nervous wreck out in the waiting room."
Jack chuckled. "Was more of a nervous wreck this time than I was when Charlie was born... at least then I knew he was coming..."
"George didn't tell me much, said I had to get the story from you. What happened?"
Leaning back in his chair, Jack gave the older man an abbreviated story of the events leading up that night. "It was the shock of my life when I saw her standing on the ramp. But looking back, it explains a lot of little clues that I'd seen but dismissed." He looked up at Jacob. "I do love her, Sir. I have for a long time now. When she'd left, I thought I'd lost my chance to tell her. She's agreed to marry me."
"I got that idea from what she said as she fell asleep. I knew when I first saw the two of you together there was a mutual attraction. Neither of you was willing to act on it at the time. I have no objections to Sam marrying you. She couldn't have made a better choice, and I've got a fine grandson now as a result."
"Thank you, Sir. I promise you, I'll take care of them both."
"I know you will, Jack. I'll have to leave in another day or two. Let me know when the wedding will be, I'll come back for it. If I know my Sam, she'll want to do it up right. She may be tough as nails military through and through, but even as a little girl, she wanted a traditional wedding."
"She can have whatever she wants."
"Don't ever hurt her, Colonel," Jacob slipped into a more serious tone.
"I would never intentionally do that, Sir. I love her too much to. The whole time she was gone, I kept trying to figure what I said or did to make her leave. Never once did this enter my mind, and now I don't know how I could have missed it."
"Sam was always good at hiding things. Constantly being the new kid every time she turned around, she also learned to rely on herself. It was a defensive move for her to hide the pregnancy from you, and a bigger one when she left. She was showing you in her own way how much she loves you. Putting your career before her needs."
"I know that, but apart of me will always regret not being there for her, not sharing this with her."
"You were there for her during his birth. That's what she'll remember the most. That you didn't reject her."
"I could never do that. She has my heart, she's just given me the greatest gift one person can give another. She's given me a second chance in so many different ways. I owe her so much."
"From what I've seen, you two are even. Just love her and take care of her and my grandson, and I'll be happy. Now, you need to get some sleep. If you go back in to see her later looking like you do now, Doctor Fraiser will put you in a bed next to Sam's."
"Yes, sir."
Jacob chuckled. "We're soon to be family. I think you can stop with the Sirs."
"You'll always be General Carter, Sir, even after the wedding."
"We'll work on that... go to bed. I'm going to go back and spend more time with my grandson."
Jack nodded, then wearily pushed himself out of the chair. He then slowly made his way out of the mess and towards his quarters.
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The next morning, Sam looked up from feeding Jacob as Jack came into the room, pushing a wheelchair in front of him. She chuckled. "Why does this scene seem familiar?"
Jack grinned at her. "Your chariot awaits for when our son is done." "He's got your appetite. We're going to be a while." She looked back down at the baby.
Jack perched on the edge of the bed. "Always knew you had the instincts to be a great mother... I was right."
"I'm learning as I go here. It's so weird. I got so used to feeling him the last few months... I couldn't sleep last night, it was so weird not being able to feel him moving." She gently stroked the baby's cheek as he greedily suckled at the bottle.
"It will get easier once you're home and away from the hospital and base setting. It will be nice to be just the three of us for the first time." He thought he would never tire of seeing this side of her.
Finally, Jacob finished with the bottle. Jack waited until Sam had burped the baby before getting up and bringing the chair closer to the bed.
"Ready to go home?"
She allowed him to take Jacob from her, then she gingerly got off the bed. "Still feels weird thinking of your place as home. Spent the last week in hotels."
He helped her into the wheelchair, then handed her Jacob again. "It's our home now, or better yet, when things have settled down further towards what's normal for us, we can find a place that's truly ours."
"Maybe. For now I just want to get there and get settled. I'm still trying to figure out which end is up." She sighed, getting comfortable in the chair as Jack started to push it out of the infirmary.
"About that... we have a few visitors waiting for you..." He warned her with a smile.
"Been wondering where they were."
"They're preparing a surprise for you and Jacob."
A smile played at her lips. "A surprise? What is it?"
"If I told you, then it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?" They were now heading outside.
Sam giggled softly. "Not even a clue?"
"Not even one." Reaching the car, he once again took the baby from her and settled him into the carseat now installed in his car. He then helped her into the front seat. "You'll know soon enough. Your father's even supervising."
A smile grew at the mental picture she got. "Can't wait to see this."
"When I left I was wishing I'd set up a hidden camera. Haven't laughed that hard in so long." He chuckled climbing behind the wheel.
"That bad?" She rested her head back on the head rest, eyes closing.
"And then some..." He glanced over when she didn't respond. He saw she'd fallen asleep already. Janet had warned him she'd be doing that for the next couple of days.
Jack reached over and gently woke her after he'd finally parked the car in front of his house. "Sam, we're home. There's more comfortable places inside where you can nap."
"Hmmm?" She slowly blinked her eyes open. "Where?"
He reached over and gently stroked her cheek. "Home."
She smiled softly, turning towards the caress. "Beginning to love the sound of that."
"Then let's go inside, see if the surprise is ready for you." He gave her a gentle kiss, then climbed out of the car. As Sam gingerly did the same, he got Jacob out of his carseat. Taking her hand with his free one, he led her up to the front door. Once they'd stepped into the house, he covered her eyes with one hand. "I promised. Just trust me and follow my lead."
Carefully, he guided her to what had been the guest room. It took everything he had not to start laughing before he removed his hand from her eyes. Counting to three, he could feel Sam's curiosity growing. Finally, he removed his hand.
She looked at the scene before her and immediately, the laughter started. Teal'C stood to one side of the small room, head cocked to the side as he watched in confusion at this strange earth custom. Jacob stood inside the half finished crib, screwdriver in one hand, wrench in the other. He was arguing with Daniel, who stood holding the directions to the crib upside down. "This has to be written in some obscure language, either that or code. No one could follow these directions."
"The ones you've given me so far haven't made any sense, this crib looks nothing like the picture on the box, let alone the display model we saw in the store..." His words trailed off as he heard Sam's laughter. "JACK!"
"What? You knew when I left an hour ago I was picking her up. You swore to me it would be ready." Jack was chuckling himself.
Sam suddenly wrapped her arms around her stomach. Her laughter was now punctuated by Owww, every few seconds as her body reminded her how sore she really was. She felt Jack's hand on her shoulder as he lead her from the door
and sat her down on the couch.
"Breathe, Sam..." He settled behind her; pulling her into his arms.
"Needed that..." she said when she could finally talk again. She snuggled back against him.
"The laugh?" He pressed a kiss onto her temple.
"Yes, it's been a long time since I had something to laugh like that about. That was priceless. Please tell me you got some pictures..." She was still chuckling softly.
"Managed to get a few. Something we can show Jacob later, after we've used them as blackmail on Uncles Danny and Teal'C."
"Not to mention grandpa..."
"He's in his prime right now. He commandeered Jacob a minute ago."
"I'm glad he's here to share this. Thank you for contacting him."
He pressed another kiss against her temple. "You're welcome. It was right that he should be here. I barely remembered to ask the General to get a hold of him while you were threatening my manhood."
"You go through twelve hours of labor and let's see how well you hold up..." She turned her head so that her cheek rested on his chest. "We'll let them struggle with the crib for a little while longer. Jacob needs his crib put together while he's still small enough to actually sleep in it..."
Jack chuckled lightly. "I could go in and help them..."
"Would also like him to be able to see it completed before he goes to college..." she shot back with a giggle.
"Hey!"
She lifted her head off his shoulder and gave him a smile, she then leaned in for a kiss. "Love you..." she softly whispered.
"Love you too. I only wish I'd found the courage to tell you that before you'd left..." His hand came up, lightly cupping her cheek.
She pulled back a slight ways. "You did."
His brow creased in confusion. "I did. When?"
"That last night. When I came over. You told me as you fell asleep. That's why I didn't stay that night. I had to leave before we both lost our careers." His fingers continued to stroke her cheek. "Sam... I wish you had stayed. I wish I had known. As hurt as I felt last night, I can't blame or judge you."
"I'm sorry..." she whispered.
"You're back. That's what counts. As soon as you're settled in here, we can start on the wedding. You can have whatever you want."
She sat up more, looking into his eyes, a smile growing. "Really?"
Jack smiled, watching her literally light up. He knew right then and there, he'd never get tired of seeing that look on her. "Really. Formal. Casual. Large. Small. Whatever you want."
Sam's response was cut off by a volley of muttered curses in several languages came from the direction of the soon to be nursery. She giggled at the sound. "Let's go rescue them. This is one job that requires a woman's touch." She gingerly got up off the couch and headed into the other room, Jack following close behind.
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"I can sit down on the floor," Carter futilely protested as her father and Jack guided her to the chair they'd brought in for her.
"You don't have to. You can tell us what to do from there a lot more comfortably than on the floor," her father firmly told her before picking up his screwdriver again.
"I put one of these things together last month. By myself, I think I can do it again. Why don't you guys sit here and watch instead."
"Sam. Samantha." Came the stern tones from Jack and Jacob.
She shot them each a glare. "Fine, then hand me the directions at least." When the men seemed to hesitate, Sam looked each of them in the eye.
"I'd like for Jacob to sleep in it before he's out of diapers..."
That earned her a series of sheepish grins before Jack handed her the directions. The elder Jacob merely smiled at his daughter. He could tell by watching the four others in the room that she'd be well loved, happy, and taken care of even though he couldn't be there for her. He knew he would have to return soon, that as much as he wanted to stay, there were more pressing items which required his attention. He could still see a haunted look deep in her eyes, but he also knew that was something she and O'Neill would have to work out together, on their own. His eyes wandered the room, the four friends were already joking amongst each other as Sam gave directions on how to get the crib set up. His grandson slept in a portable bassinet not far from where he stood.
Jacob walked over and gently picked up his namesake, memorizing the baby's features. He knew from experience they'd be changing ever so much each day. He had no idea how long it would be before he saw his grandson again after he left.
"Dad..." Sam's voice broke through his thoughts.
"He's perfect, Sam. Absolutely perfect..."
She wrapped an arm around his waist with a smile, resting her head on his shoulder. "You're not disappointed?"
"Never. Why should I be? You've always marched to your own drummer your entire life. Why should this have been any different?" He dropped a kiss on the top of her head. "In fact, I've never been prouder."
"Thanks. I'm glad you're here, I've missed you."
"And I've missed you. There's no place else I'd rather be right now, but I've got to go back tonight."
She sighed softly. "Can't say I like that, but I understand."
"How's my grandson's crib coming?"
"The Keystone cops are almost finished. Could have had it put together myself hours ago... but that would have meant I'd have missed all the fun." She smiled fondly over at her friends who were placing the mattress into the now assembled crib. "As soon as I give it a safety inspection, Jacob can sleep in it."
The elder Jacob laughed. "I remember your mother doing much the same thing."
"I'm finally happy, Dad. Completely happy." She looked up at him.
"I can tell that. And as long as you remain this happy, I'll be happy. If you ever need me for anything, Samantha, you know how to get a hold of me."
"I know, Dad, and I appreciate that. You'll be getting a wedding invitation soon."
"Looking forward to that. Go on, Sam, spend some time with your friends. I'm going to continue bonding with my grandson."
With a smile, Sam leaned in and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Take all the time you want."
Sam settled down onto the floor with a sigh. Jack was outside seeing the last of their guests off. General Hammond had stopped by to pick up her father an hour ago. Now, finally, Daniel and Teal'C were gone. Eyeing the crib in front of her, she reached for the wrench and screwdriver she'd taken out. Jacob was not sleeping in that crib until she'd checked every nut and bolt herself. Crawling on her back underneath it, she started in on her self appointed inspection. She needed to do something. All afternoon, the men in her life had seen to her every need, to Jacob's every need. Each time he'd cried one of them was there before she could even think about moving. As the afternoon had progressed, she'd grown more and more frustrated with them, snapping at Daniel at one point when he'd tried to take the baby from her in order to change his diaper.
"And just what are you doing?" Came Jack's amused voice from the doorway.
Startled, Sam tried to sit upright, momentarily forgetting the low clearance. The crib jumped up as her head connected with the its underside. Muffled curses rolled out from under the crib as Sam made her way out, holding her head.
Chuckling softly, Jack moved to kneel in front of her. "See what happens when you do something you're not supposed to."
"I'm not made of glass. I can get down on the floor and make sure the crib is safe for Jacob to sleep in." Her hand rubbed at the spot on her forehead she'd hit.
Jack leaned forward and kissed the spot. "Knew I'd like this side of you."
"What side's that?" She raised her head to meet his eyes.
"This... the more maternal side, the lioness with her cub. Seen glimpses of it before, with Cassy, with the Nox child. But it's even more so now with our son. You've always had great instincts, I'm just enjoying seeing them come out full force."
Her expression serious, she made herself more comfortable. "I almost didn't come back..."
Jack settled down across from her. "What?"
"I hadn't planned on coming back here. I was working down at Kennedy, helping with the new rocket and shuttle designs. Bored to tears, but content. My apartment down there was all ready, nursery was complete about a month ago. Then the dreams started. They kept telling me that I had to come back here, that I needed to be on Avalon when the baby was born. The more I tried to ignore them, the more insistent they became. A week ago, I finally requested a transfer back here. All of my stuff is still in Florida, in storage. I brought what I could fit in my car of things I knew I'd need and that was it."
Jack looked at her, slightly stunned. "Had you ever planned on letting me know?"
"Truthfully?" At his nod, she continued. "I don't know. I had no clue what I was going to do after he was born. With any part of my life."
He reached out, gentle fingers stroking her cheek as he searched her face, his own eyes dark and unreadable. "I'm glad you listened to your subconscious," he softly whispered.
Tears formed in the corners of her eyes. "I don't know how you can be so forgiving... I almost denied you all this..."
"You didn't... Don't move..." He got to his feet and walked over to the bassinet. Gently, he picked Jacob up and came back over to her. He set the sleeping baby in her arms, then sat down behind her, wrapping his arms around her, pulling her into his embrace. "All that matters is what's right here. You, Jacob, me. The past needs to remain in the past for us to have a future. We can't spend the rest of our lives blaming and judging. Look at him, Sam, he's the future. Our future. He deserves to have both of us. I love you, Sam Carter, and I love our son. I'm willing to do whatever it takes for us to be a family."
She turned her head to look at him, tears tracked her cheeks. "When did you get to be so wise?" she softly asked.
"I learned the hard way. I couldn't leave the past in the past when Charlie died. As a result I lost Sara and a good couple years of my life. I'm not about to let that happen with you. You're stuck with me whether you like it or not." He gently kissed the tears away.
She lifted her head to meet his lips. "I like..." she whispered.
If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Samantha Petersen
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