NotAlone
You’re Not Alone
I saw you walking by yourself;
Your eyes were crying out for help.
I have never seen a man look so alone. As Daniel Jackson stumbled through the Stargate supported by Colonel Jack O’Neill and Major Samantha Carter, the agony, the abject despair in his eyes bespoke a terrible tragedy. “What happened?” I demanded on the way back to the infirmary.
Daniel didn’t answer except to mutter, “It can’t be true. It can’t.”
Sam and Jack exchanged glances before the colonel responded, “Hand device.” There was more to the story, I could tell, but the way Daniel looked at me with pleading eyes convinced me not to push the issue.
I know you feel your pain is more
Than anyone’s been hurt before.
I shooed the rest of SG-1 out of the infirmary and set about treating Daniel. He didn’t speak, simply staring off into empty space. He wasn’t in shock, but he was definitely traumatized. I sat down beside him on the bed. “What happened?” I asked again.
I know love hurts when it’s over.
If you want to cry, it’s all right.
Daniel closed his eyes and turned his head away. “Please don’t make me think about it Janet.”
“That’s all you’ve been doing,” I said gently. “It’ll do you good to tell someone. Who did this to you?”
“I don’t even believe it myself, Janet, please...”
You’re like a fallen soldier,
But you just can’t lay down and die.
“Who?” I persisted. I had a pretty good idea, and if I was right, he needed to let it out. He was in denial, and that wasn’t going to help anyone, least of all himself.
After a long silence, Daniel finally whispered, “It doesn’t matter, anyway. Teal’C killed her. If he hadn’t, I’d be dead now. Instead of just wishing I was.”
You’ve got to remember
You’re not alone in this world.
My suspicions were all but confirmed by that statement. “It does matter, Daniel.”
Always remember
You’re not alone in this world.
He stared into my eyes, with torture in his own. “It was Amaunet!” he cried in anguish. “Teal’C killed her to save me - and now Sha’uri is dead!”
The moment that I looked at you,
I recognized the killing truth:
You really think there’s no way out,
But if you let me, I can help you now.
The poor man was a wreck, his hopes dashed, his dreams shattered. I hated Amaunet for what she had done to Sha’uri, but more for what she had done to Daniel. I hoped I’d be able to help Daniel get through this, his darkest hour.
Through all these shattered emotions,
There’s a lesson to learn.
So come on, let me hold you closer;
Love can soothe what love has burned.
“Oh, God, Janet, she’s dead,” Daniel moaned. “What am I going to do now? She was my love, my life... and she’s gone!”
You’ve got to remember
You’re not alone in this world.
“I should have seen it coming!” he suddenly raged. “I should have known something would happen to her. If I’d stayed away from her, she’d still be alive!”
Always remember
You’re not alone in this world.
“What makes you say that?” I asked.
“Everyone I’ve ever loved has gotten hurt or killed. My parents, Skaara, Sarah, and now Sha’uri... Janet, I can’t take it anymore!”
You’ve got to remember
Never alone...
“It’s like I’m destined to be lonely for the rest of my life,” Daniel whispered, his anger at himself abating. “I’d rather it was me dead instead of her.”
Never alone...
“You don’t have to be lonely, Daniel,” I said softly. “You’ll always have your friends. And I promise you: Jack Sam, Teal’C, and I will always be here for you when you need us.”
Never, never alone.
The first tear slipped down his face.
Through all these shattered emotions,
There’s a lesson to learn.
So come on, let me hold you closer;
Love can soothe what love has burned.
I took him in my arms and let him cry.
You’ve got to remember
You’re not alone in this world.
I wanted to offer sympathy, to say something, anything at all, to comfort him.
Always remember
You’re not alone in this world.
But at the same time, I knew better than to make him relive the episode again. It was painful for me to think about; I could only imagine what he must have been feeling.
You’ve got to remember...
I knew that all he wanted to do was to forget. I held him until he cried himself to sleep.
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