Coffee Talk
Coffee Talk
by Kate
Title: Coffee Talk
Author: Kate
Email: sorsha16@hotmail.com
Category: Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Pairing: Sam/Jack
Spoilers: Line of Duty, The Tok'ra 1&2,
Season: 3
Rating: PG
Content Warnings: angst
Status: Completed
Summary: Ummm ... even though the title seems a little chatty ... it's actually pretty serious. Sam talks with Jack about Jolinar, and they have to sort some stuff out. Very little coffee involved.
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
Author's notes: I'm back! It's been awhile I know ... but I'm still here. Like I could really stay away for long.
Hope everyone likes this ... it's a little too sappy for me.
As usual ... feedback welcome.
He saw raw hurt in her eyes as she held the coffee cup closer to her chest. Sam shrugged and tried not to look into his eyes. She knew that would be her undoing.
"It was the worst feeling on earth." She murmured ... her tone falling away. Jack distinctively felt a 'but' coming on.
He took care of that.
"But you talk like it was the best thing to happen in your life." His tone seemed a little harsher than he meant it to be. For that he sought her gaze, reaching over a hand to touch her fingers when she refused to look at him.
"No," she shook her head quickly. "It was a great learning experience ... but to be trapped."
He found deep pain in her gaze when she did finally look up. A pure emotion that he knew he couldn't touch, couldn't fix.
"Trapped in your own mind, where your private thoughts are suddenly open game for a stranger to pick through-"
He interrupted her, "Sam, you don't have to."
Carter's eyes lifted and he found resolve in her glance. And a perfect honestly that he had come to expect from his second.
"She knew Jack."
"What?" he shook his head in confusion, not understand what she was talking about. He had some clue, but he was still slightly thrown by her sudden openness about Jolinar of Malkshur.
"Jolinar knew about you, about how I felt."
They studied each other a moment. Holding their eyes to each other. A pair of bottomless browns fixed on bright blues. And they knew ...
"We weren't together then." He finally murmured in response.
"She knew," her eyes dropped back to her coffee as she shrugged, then rose again to meet him.
"She told me."
He shook his head, anger thick, "That doesn't change what she did."
Sam took a deep breath, trying to think through his hatred of the Tok'ra. It was hard ... when such a large part of her still was Tok'ra.
"Jolinar taught me a lot about myself." She whispered.
"You're defending her again." He murmured, his tone almost accusing.
Blue eyes flashed up in response to his tone and he knew at once that it had been a mistake. She wasn't as much angry, as hurt. Pained that he could think so callously about a part of her life.
"She saved my life Jack."
He toned down his voice and looked into her eyes, "After she took it over."
He saw something else wash over her face. Maybe pity that he couldn't forgive a dead woman. Maybe disappointment that he was too small minded about the situation. He didn't know which. But he was relieved when half a smile touched the corners of her mouth.
"Jack, I forgave her ... you should too."
He watched her for a few moments, sizing the comment she had just made to him. He cocked his head, almost acknowledging that she was right. He blinked, and she saw pain touch his eyes, crease his forehead.
"She tried to take you from me Sam, how do I forgive her for that?"
That was where his real pain was. It wasn't the anger at the female Tok'ra that touched him so much. It was the fact that she had nearly died. That he had almost lost her ... before he'd ever really had her.
"Love me, that part of me. The part with Jolinar. Then you'll come to forgive her."
He grunted and dropped his eyes to his coffee, his head shaking softly, barely. "It's not that easy."
"Love never is."
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