Finding Strength
Finding Strength
by Sam I Am
Summary: It's been five years since the end of 'Vulnerability' and things on Earth aren't going well. Just when Jack tries to pick up the pieces of his broken heart and perhaps get on with his life, the plot thickens. yet again!
Category: Angst, Drama, Romance
Season: Season 4
Pairing: Jack/Sam
Rating: 13+
Warnings: none
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 2005-02-05
Finding Strength By Sam I Am - murraytheevilskull@hotmail.com
Rating: 13+ (can't honestly be any more than that)
Warnings: Sam/Jack (that's a warning for anyone who don't like that) also Daniel/Janet.
Category: Sam/Jack Romance, mild Daniel/Janet, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, probably AU fic as it couldn't happen in the series, friendship and a little bit of SG-1 Humour thrown in for good measure. (If there's anything I missed out someone tell me!)
Spoilers: Bits and Bobs from Seasons 1-4!
Sequel: To `Vulnerability'! (Yes, I actually finished the sequel!!!)
Time frame: 5 years after `Vulnerability'!
Summary: It's been five years since the end of `Vulnerability' and things on Earth aren't going well. Just when Jack tries to pick up the pieces of his broken heart and perhaps get on with his life, the plot thickens... yet again!
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime / Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. No copyright infringement is intended. No money is being made. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. `Candle in the Wind' is sung by Elton John and I altered the lyrics without permission (Sorry!) No Copyright intended, it's one of my favourite songs and it worked perfectly with the story! Not to be archived without permission. If you want to archive my story TELL ME, or, to borrow a phrase from our beloved Colonel, I am SO gonna kick your ass!
Author's Notes: THIS STORY IS A SEQUEL! I suggest no one reads this without reading 'Vulnerability' first! The sequel has arrived! Oh it took me a while, but its here! I have always loved `Vulnerability' since I began writing it in yr7. Now I've finally completed the story and I can rest at night in the knowledge that the story that began in the days of my youth is now ready to be read by you guys!
Dedications: Hannah, I should stop praising you! But I can't! It's physically impossible! You are the greatest girly friend I could have and I will NEVER forget you. Love you, Hon. Also to all my friends and to all of you guys who have read my stuff. I'm glad to hear what you think. Thanks again.
The waiting is over... Finding Strength!
~~~~~~
Part Four
5 years later
Cassandra climbed out of her car slowly, making sure her sunglasses were firmly secure and that her hat shaded her face. She locked the car and glanced around the car park. Just in case.
She walked towards the building cautiously. Some of the mothers greeted her with a small nod or smile as she entered the building. She smiled and nodded back as she walked slowly towards the room where the soft music was coming from.
She stood by the door and watched the little girls all dancing in time with the music, like little pink fairies. They were reflected in the mirrors that surrounded the room making it seem as though there were hundreds of them.
The teacher noticed her and signalled for her to come in. Cassie sidled into the room and sat on a chair in the corner, watching quietly.
She smiled at the tiny girl in a pink leotard with her golden hair pulled into a small bun. She'd always been tiny and had therefore been placed near the front. Memories from years back resurfaced and not for the first time Cassie was glad she was wearing sunglasses. She pulled her fingers along the bottom of her eyes removing the tears that had begun to form.
The teacher spoke to the little girl, as she bent down holding the girl's wrist gently and lifting the tiny arm up, "No, Megan. Remember... up and down."
The small child nodded as she lifted her arm and brought it down again and the kindly ballet teacher smiled her approval.
Cassie felt her heart break as the little girl grinned back, her blue eyes and her grin full of joy. She looked so much like her mother sometimes.
The lesson finished and Cassie stood up as the little girl noticed her. Megan's smile widened as she ran to her, "Cassie!"
Cassie put a smile on her face and lifted the girl into her arms, "Hello Sunshine!" She lowered the girl to the floor as she murmured, "Have fun today?"
The little girl nodded eagerly as Cassie took her small hand and led her to the cloakroom, as the child recounted her whole lesson. Cassie gently removed the five-year-olds ballet shoes and helped her to pull her jeans and t-shirt over the top of her tights and leotard. She began to tie Megan's sneaker laces as the girl murmured, "Where's Daddy? He said he was gonna pick me up today."
Cassie looked up wondering if the young girl would understand. Megan had moved up a class at school and was doing work with children a year older than she was. The teacher had even discussed moving her up again, but Jack had refused. She was a bright child and had a way of seeing things. She'd understand...
"Cassie?"
Cassandra realised she'd been staring at the girl. She stared down at the tiny feet as she continued to lace up the little pink sneakers, "You know those bad people that are always trying to take photos of you?"
Megan nodded slowly as Cassie stood up and took the girl's hand, engulfing the tiny fingers in her bigger ones. She sighed trying to find a way to explain it to the young girl, "Well, they're trying to take even more pictures because they now know who you are. Before, we managed to keep you a secret, but someone who we foolishly trusted told them what your pretend name was."
"Somebody tattle-tailed? Was it Kinsey?"
Cassie half smiled half grimaced at the child as they walked out of the cloakroom and towards the car park, "Yes. Now your Dad is trying really hard to make the bad people go away."
Megan nodded and said quietly, admitting something bad she'd done, "One of them phoned Daddy yesterday. Me and Ryan listened on the phone upstairs," the little girl was wearing a troubled expression as she murmured, "I didn't understand it, but Ryan did. He said that the bad people are trying to make Mommy into a movie."
Cassie frowned in shock, "What?" Suddenly a feeling in her stomach made her look up down the corridor. Outside the doors, about a dozen Reporters and their camera crews were waiting in the car park.
"Damn you, Kinsey," Cassie muttered as she grabbed Megan and lifted her into her arms hurrying into the toilets. It was all that snotty bureaucrat's fault for telling the press in the first place. It had only been a few months after... Sam's death that he decided to reveal the whole SGC program. That was understandable, but telling them about Megan and Ryan? That was downright spiteful and Cassie hated the man because of it!
She sat the girl on the side as she removed her shades and hat. She hurriedly put them on the little girl who frowned at her, "Cassie?"
Cassandra pulled off her hooded sweater also pulling that onto the girl as she spoke fiercely, "They are not going to get any decent pictures of you. Even if they know your name, I'm not going to let them know what you look like!"
The girl spoke worriedly, "What about you?"
Cassie sighed and smiled gently, at the tiny child, quite literally hidden by her adult sized sweater, "Well, they're gonna work out who I am at some point."
The little girl began to cry frightened, tiny tears cascading from her beautiful azure eyes, "Will they hurt you?"
Cassie let out a small gasp and hugged the girl tightly, "Oh no. They won't hurt me, Megan." She pulled back and grabbed a tissue from one of the toilets, gently wiping away the little girl's tears.
She then stared into the wide blue eyes and murmured hurriedly, "We're gonna have to make a run for it, just like at the supermarket on Monday."
"You're gonna put me in a trolley?"
Cassie laughed at the little girl as she murmured, "No. I'm going to carry you. I want you to hold on really tightly and hide your face in my shoulder as much as you can, OK?"
The child nodded sincerely as Cassie lifted the girl into her arms. The child wrapped her legs around her waist and Cassie was reminded of carrying her little brother. Megan held on tightly burying her face into Cassie's shoulder and pulling the hood of the jacket down over her glistening blue eyes.
Cassie took a deep breath suddenly realising that once the Reporters knew who she was her life would become a living hell. She couldn't even comprehend what it would be like. Especially if it was anywhere near as bad as what happened to Jack and, to a lesser extent until now, the kids.
She stepped back into the corridor and was faced by most of the mothers. She stared at them wondering what to do next as they both stood staring at each other until one of them spoke.
"Is it true? What the Reporters are saying? That... she's the daughter of Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter?"
Megan glanced up at the people fearfully and then up at Cassie. The young woman nodded gently, "Please. Help us. We can't get out of here on our own."
The women all looked at each other for conformation before another mom who was holding her little girl murmured, "We'll get you out." She glanced at her own daughter as she murmured, "Can't imagine how hard it must be for you."
Cassie smiled gratefully, "Thank you so much."
The woman gave her a comforting smile, as she murmured, "Stand here and we'll surround you."
Cassie felt a pride in the human race that she hadn't felt for a while. These moms realised how horrifying it must be for them. Especially now the papers had discovered the hidden children belonging to two of the greatest heroes history would ever know. For the first time since Teal'c chose exile and moved back to Chulak, Cassie found herself wishing she'd done the same.
She hadn't seen Rya'c for what felt like years when really it had only been weeks. He'd asked, almost begged her to come live with him on Chulak. Now she was beginning to wish she had. Earth had become no more than a living nightmare.
The swarm of women moved into the car park as Cassie clung to the small child. Flashes came from every direction as did the many obnoxious voices of Reporters, as they spoke in chorus, "We want to speak to Miss O'Neill!"
There were many rude comments aimed at the Reporters from the women around her as they surrounded her car. Cassie managed to open the driver's door and climbed in hurriedly, the door slamming after her. She immediately locked all the doors and then collapsed in the driver's seat.
Megan detached herself and scrambled into the passenger seat, fastening her seat belt and pulling her blanket over her.
Cassie started the engine hastily as Reporters that were behind the car refused to budge. There was no way she could drive through them. They were trapped.
Cassie glanced at the girl curled up beneath her blanket, shivering slightly. Daniel had told Megan once that if she covered herself in the blanket she could become invisible. Cassie wished it was that easy.
The flashes of cameras finally made it to the car windows as the Reporters banged on the windows saying, "Who are you?" "Why are you with Miss O'Neill?" "How do you know the Colonel?" "Are you related to Miss O'Neill?" "Is it true your Colonel O'Neill's lover?" "What is Colonel O'Neill really like?" "Is this your stepdaughter-to-be?"
Cassie just sighed and ignored them, no longer able to take this. She didn't have the will power to hide any more. She glanced back down at the shaking blanket as she spoke softly, ignoring the din outside, "Megan, honey?"
The little girl whispered, "I want my Mommy."
Cassie felt her eyes filling with tears as the flashes of cameras became even more ferocious, trying to capture every second of her agony. She suddenly felt a wave of rage well within her. She unwound the window a crack, so the Reporters could hear her but couldn't touch her.
A silence suddenly came over the mob as Cassie's angry tears were caught by many cameras, "Who the hell do you think you are! She's five years old and you've already made her life a living hell, not to mention Jack's and Ryan's. You've made Daniel's life a misery, you've made Janet's life a nightmare and you drove Teal'c back to Chulak!" Cassie felt herself yelling as the Reporters all stared at her flabbergasted, "And now you want to mutate the memory of a fantastic woman into some Hollywood blockbuster! You are sick! You all are! I thought you couldn't stoop any lower, but no! You mob a little girl, who a few moments ago was happy and telling me all about how she was doing in her ballet classes!"
They all stared at her as she revved the engine; some even were decent enough to look ashamed. Cassie spoke furiously, "Now let me go and if you ever EVER publish a single picture of this I'm going to personally make sure that Jack sues your arses for everything you're worth!"
The crowd moved away from the car as Cassie reversed out of the space and sped out of the car park, full throttle still fuming with rage. She slowed down slightly and began to drive back at a safe speed as she murmured, "It's OK, Megan. You can come out. We're going home."
The girl peaked out of her blanket cocoon as she murmured sadly, "Which one?"
~~~~~~
Jack sat in the quiet room and rubbed his temples gently, as he let out a small sigh. This was not good. He looked up and his eyes met with the smartly dressed woman sat across the room from him. She spoke gently, "I'm sure we'll find a way to stop this."
Jack shook his head as he looked away from the woman who had done so much for him over the years they'd known each other. He owed her. More than he could ever repay. And yet he still spoke the truth, even though he knew she really didn't want to hear it, "They'll be planning a sequel in two years."
It was Janet's turn to sigh sadly. He watched as she pulled her clever fingers over her tired, sad eyes, "This is wrong."
"What isn't these days?"
Again Jack spoke words of truth. Janet observed the man who'd gained the nasty habit of never meeting anyone's gaze anymore. Well never fully. He may look into your eyes, but Jack O'Neill never met your gaze, not since Sam had died.
The man had lost so much. Sam's death had been the finally straw. Jack O'Neill's usual larger than life personality had diminished and had been replaced with a hollow shell. Jack never let on. In fact, Janet guessed, only the Colonel's best friends could see it. Everyone else must still see the funny, sarcastic, witty, stubborn Colonel. The man used the mask to hide the blankness. To hide the fact that his vitality was all gone.
There were four certain people in this world that Jack was making sure would never know the darkness within him. In front of them, he'd kept the mask firmly secured, never letting it slip and painting over it with vibrant colours to mask his emptiness even more.
Two of the four were Ryan and Megan. Janet knew that the Colonel loved his children more than life itself and she knew he was always his old self around his kids, his only livelihood. Janet hoped they hadn't noticed what had become of their father. Ryan was too young to remember his father when he'd been truly happy and Megan hadn't been born so Janet assumed neither could see anything out of the ordinary as `Jack and the Iron Mask' was not a horror story to them. It was their life.
The other two were her children. Cassie knew and had, in fact, discussed it in a tearful conversation with both her and Daniel before. Cassie took Jack's barrenness the worst out of everyone. She had guessed it was something to do with Cassie's alien abilities. Cassie had told her that the minute she had looked into the Colonel's eyes after the funeral she had known she had lost more than one friend.
Jack's performance was even more forced before Cassie now. He obviously sensed something, sensed that Cassie knew. Janet had pretended not to notice that he avoided meeting the young woman's eyes and if he did, he flinched.
As for Jonathon, named after his godfather, he was still a baby, well at least to Janet! Janet felt slight happiness at her memories. Jonathon forced the best out of Jack O'Neill. After all, he'd obviously inherited Daniel's stubbornness when it came to getting Jack to see his point of view and her determination to get Jack to do what she told him!
When situations were tense you could always count on Little Jonathon to come in and practically order his godfather to come and play with him. Jack would always grin at the boy and her son would take his hand and lead him from the room, missing the expressionless look on Jack's face when his back was turned.
Since that mission when SG-1 had all been dipped in the Fountain of Youth, Janet had become much closer to Jack than she had been before. Janet now considered the man her best friend, well after Sam anyway...
Janet nodded as she gave a small sniffle, shaking memories from her mind. She felt her anger rising as their current situation came straight back into her head in the wake of her thoughts. Suddenly she wished she had a million needles to stab into one `certain' group of people, "I'm going to kill Kinsey for telling the Reporters about Ryan and Megan. If I ever see him again..."
The statement was left hanging as the woman let out a frustrated growl from her throat. Jack's face stayed impassive, as usual, though she could tell by the way his hands were clenched into white-knuckled fists that he was furious. Jack stood up and walked over beside her and lowered himself into the chair next to her, "The glass is half full," he muttered, the only optimism she thought she'd heard leave the Colonel's lips in all earnest in a long time. He spoke with emotion, "I'm just glad they don't know about Cassie and Jonathon yet."
"Yeah," the small doctor murmured equally glad. She really didn't want the Reporters to find about the offspring of a certain Archaeologist and CMO of a certain infamous covert operation under a certain mountain. She grumbled angrily, "God, the media can be such heartless bastards!"
He sighed softly and sadly murmured, "Daniel told me that... uh... Cassie is moving to Chulak."
Janet smiled slightly, her maternal feelings pricking the backs of her eyes, "Yeah. My little girl's going to get married to Teal'c's little boy."
Jack smiled, making Janet almost jump in shock, "It was meant to be!"
Janet gave a soft chuckle, appreciating the Colonel's comment as she had seen part of him in there somewhere for a split second before it was sucked back into the lifeless void. She spoke, "Since they met, just before... Sam died... they've been head over heels with each other."
Jack nodded although his mind still lingered on the name he rarely spoke anymore. It seemed his vocal chords just couldn't produce the right sound, as if they refused to say that name.
Janet placed a hand on his back as she murmured, "Me and Daniel were thinking of going to Chulak too."
"He told me," Jack replied sadly, eyes still firmly averted, "I honestly don't blame you."
"Earth is no longer the place for us. I mean Jonathon is four years old and should start kindergarten soon, but if anyone finds out... who he is..." Janet's voice trailed away.
Jack looked up from the floor at the woman who had become irreplaceable to him over the past years. She was always there to help him. Being a single father was the hardest thing Jack had ever had to go through. Janet, of course, had stepped straight in, even though she had enough worries with her own growing family, and had assumed an Aunt-like role. Helping him, comforting him, reassuring him, and supporting him whenever he needed guidance. Always there for him. Completely irreplaceable.
Silvery tears fell from her kind brown eyes as she held a hand to her forehead, her elbow resting on her knee. She let out a sob, "Why? Why is this happening? What did we do?"
Jack spoke anxiously, watching her sat beside him in her best suit and crying, "Janet?"
Jack felt fear. Janet was his strong rock, and if the truth was to be known he hadn't seen her cry since Sam's funeral. Now, she was sobbing and Jack realised that everything that had happened to them had finally caught up with her. Janet, the woman he'd grown to love like a sister, had broken. She never looked up at him as she usual would have done, but continued to sob into her hands in absolute misery. He tried to speak comfortingly, tried to comfort the sobbing doctor, "Everything's going to be OK. We'll make it through. We always do."
She shook her head as tears continued to fall in great rivers from her sad eyes. She looked up at him and Jack knew it was time for a role change. He needed to be a rock. Sat in the waiting room of a court was not exactly the best place for Jack to be feeling the coursing emotions that struck in as he looked at Janet, surprised she wasn't drowning in a salty lake of her depressed tears. He needed to be strong and it became increasingly difficult as Janet spoke her voice a tearful sob, "Oh Jack! What are we going to do?"
Jack felt the same kind of uncertainty about everything. The only thing he'd been certain about in a long time was this... and it wasn't going well. He'd been in this court room every day for what felt like years. His lawyer tried his hardest to get the point across that Jack's life was in shambles because of the goddamn media. Now the fact that Jack had kids was public knowledge, they had a slight advantage although Jack didn't know if it would be good enough...
He looked at the woman beside him crying her compassionate heart out and pulled her into a hug as he murmured slightly shocked, "I don't know, Janet..." He rubbed her back gently as she shuddered with heart broken sobs. It was time to say something strong. Something he would've said, back when he was strong. Not this pathetic weakling he was now.
Jack decided then, he was going to change. He was going to sort himself. Not for himself, but for everyone who'd had to put up with his `Selfish Clam' act for all these years.
And so, Jack O'Neill spoke words he would never usual say. Words that caused him to think of the beautiful Major he'd fallen for all those years ago...
"...But we can beat this. We can and we will. I know we will."
~~~~~~
Cassie checked on the sleeping form of her little brother in his bed. She smiled fondly and removed his glasses placing them on the side before kissing his forehead and pulling a lock of his dark blonde fringe from his eyes. Cassie had never had a real brother or sister when she'd been living with her real mother, before Niriti... When Janet had announced she was pregnant, Cassie had been beyond overjoyed. Now, she finally had a little brother, Jonathon, and she loved him more than anything. She tucked him in tenderly before she moved to her bedroom and then crawled beneath her own covers, lying on her back and staring into the shadowy space between her and the ceiling.
A lot of things were playing on her mind and it didn't help that at night was when her `psychic' abilities were at their strongest.
Mom only returned home minutes ago. Jack had dropped her home. It was obvious her mother had been crying, crying badly. Her eyes were red-rimmed and bloodshot, her skin pale and her whole body was shaking like a leaf. That alone made Cassie realise that the appeal to stop that ghastly film from being made had obviously not gone in their favour.
The thing that had really shocked Cassie was Jack. When she'd looked at him, he'd met her gaze. And then he murmured, `Hey Cassie. It's been a while.'
In fact, he'd only seen her that morning, but the look in his eyes made her gasp with happiness as tears rose in her eyes and she flung her arms around the man's neck as she had when she was a little girl. It had been a long time, but Jack O'Neill was back. Cassie was almost positive of it.
He swung her around slightly as he mumbled shell-shocked, `Cassie, I'm me. I'm me. I'm me again.'
Cassie had pulled back and had seen a smile. He'd pulled a tissue from his pocket and she continued to cry happily. Daniel had re-entered after settling his wife in the living room and was watching them confused.
He looked at them as Jack smiled and murmured, `I'm back!'
The man's jaw had dropped and he let out a shocked laugh as he pulled Jack into a manly hug. He'd pulled back still gawping like a fish, `What? Why? How?'
`Whoa. Too many questions!' Jack had said in his... voice. The voice Cassie had missed more than she'd ever realised. He spoke seriously, `I realised that for the past 5 years I've used everyone as support... and no, Danny. `Used' is not too strong a word. It's precisely what I've been doing,' Jack said stopping her Dad from protesting, `Anyway, I realised when Janet started crying that I couldn't burden... yes, Danny, burden... you guys with all my problems any more. So, I'm back and I'll be damned if I lose control ever again.'
Her adopted father placed a hand on Jack's arm supportively, `Friends are supposed to help each other with their problems. You even think of handling this alone and I will be the one to bang your head against the wall!'
Jack had smiled again and Cassie quite possibly felt herself melt before that smile. Not in the lovey dovey way teenage girls melted when they saw male pop icons! She DEFINITELY did not have a crush on Jack O'Neill! He was old enough to be her dad! But when he smiled, it felt as if a tremendous weight that she hadn't even been aware she'd been carrying was suddenly lifted.
He spoke gently, `Where are my kids?'
Cassie had lead Jack upstairs to Megan and Ryan's room.
That was where another troubling thought played on Cassie's mind as she lay in her bed staring into the darkness. The image of Megan peeking out from beneath her `magic' blanket as the small girl had murmured sadly `Which one?'
The thing was Ryan and Megan had many homes. Jack had managed to hide them for 5 years which was nothing short of a miracle. Jack had never moved house, although it was now much more fortified for his own protection. Truth was, Megan and Ryan had permanent rooms at Jack's house, the SGC, General Hammond's house, Teal'c's house (Teal'c had been giving Sam's bungalow after she'd moved in with Jack) and Jack's ex-wife Sara's house (she had insisted that she gave the children a place to hide, even though Jack had told her they had enough hiding places).
To top it all off, the spare room of their house had also been converted into a permanent bedroom for the children 5 years ago and remained well used.
Megan and Ryan had over 30 different `homes', many belonging to SGC personnel, who had realised the Colonel's dilemma, as many were facing similar, although not as serious, problems, and had all supplied their houses as places for the two children to stay. Everyone from Hammond's Secretary to the Commissary staff to Sgt. Siler, had provided somewhere for the two children to hide out when the Reporters were on their tails.
Up until now the Reporters hadn't known they were the children of quite possibly the most famous husband and wife ever. Almost everyone had known that there were two children, a girl and a boy, but no names had ever been heard and the children had not needed to have many aliases just one each, just in case. They'd gone to school and after schools clubs like normal children, although they had abnormal sleeping arrangements.
Cassie sighed as she remembered the look of love in the man's eyes as he'd gently shaken his eight-year-old son from sleep. The boy had stood up rubbing his eyes, practically sleep walking as he'd grumbled, `Have the Reporters found us?'
`No,' as Jack had spoken the boy's eyes had shot open and a thrilled grin had appeared on his face. He'd literally thrown himself into his father's arms as Jack had murmured with a true smile, `I'm taking you home.'
The boy pulled back, a look of utter joy and wonder on his face, and his father nodded to their bags and stuff as he murmured, `Grab the bags.'
Jack had then moved to the tiny five-year-old girl lying in Ryan's bed. She'd obviously crawled into bed with her brother. The strange thing about the children was they seldom argued! They obviously knew that their life required them to stick together completely and so they had. Megan adored her older brother. She followed him everywhere and was always quiet and subdued when he went somewhere without her. The funny thing was he rarely did. He always let her come and unlike most boys his age insisted she was part of whatever he and his friends were doing.
Jack, obviously deciding not to wake the young girl, looped his arms around her small frame, hoisting her from the bed and into his arms. Her small legs clung around his body, her arms curling around his neck naturally and Jack smiled softly as he kissed her head gently.
The little girl had snuggled closer and mumbled into his shoulder, `Daddy...'
Cassie helped Ryan carry his and Megan's bags downstairs putting them into Jack's truck as Ryan climbed into the backseat. Jack detached Megan from her position clinging to him. She frowned slightly and let out a small whimper. She was still fast asleep. Jack had released a sad sigh and murmured, `No, Daddy's not leaving anymore. I promise.' He placed the girl beside her brother who cuddled her close as Jack pulled a quilt over them and then closed the door and jumped into the front.
He'd smiled at Cassie as she stood beside his truck. He looked at her with utter gratefulness as he murmured, `Thank you. For everything. Thank Daniel and Janet for me as well, would you, Cass?'
The young woman had nodded and murmured, `Sure Jack.'
He looked concerned as he murmured, `If your Mom needs help... I'm only a phone call away.' He cleared his throat, `And tell her I love her a lot. She's been... I don't know what I would've done without her.'
Cassie had nodded seriously, `I'll tell her.'
Jack had given her a look she couldn't quite understand as he closed the door giving her his trade mark casual salute as he started the truck and drove off.
The final thing plaguing her mind was this new piece of information she'd acquired from Megan this morning. They wanted to make a movie about Sam's life. She wondered how long Jack had known about this, how long ago it was since Hollywood had made the proposition. There was no doubt in her mind that Jack would fight it from being made with everything he had.
She also wondered why her mom had been crying earlier. Jack had assured her, without words that it wasn't that the case was going badly. The only reason Cassie could think of was that her mother had had a sort of breakdown. Life was being extremely harsh on them, but now, Cassie hoped, things were going to start getting better. Jack was slowly recovering, the children would no longer need to stay in different homes and they were going to win the case.
Cassie sighed softly as she finally closed her eyes and felt a tranquillity come over her, her tiredness finally catching up with her.
Everything was going to be OK now.
At least she hoped it would...
~~~~~~
Rolling around in bed for over three hours wasn't tiring. Jack had hoped that if he did it long enough he might be tired enough to fall asleep, but he'd had no such luck, as usual.
He glanced at the bedside clock, its red numbers the only light in the room.
1:06am.
"Great!" Jack grumbled to himself with a frustrated sigh. Sleep just wasn't going to come tonight. It only came when he was too exhausted to keep his eyelids open anymore and that happened every few days.
He climbed out of the small single bed and padded over to his dresser, silently removing a pair of sweatpants from the top drawer. He pulled them on over his boxers and grabbed a t-shirt to pull over that. It slipped over him with complete ease and Jack realised his eating habits, i.e. barely anything all day, were not doing his body any good. Something he'd have to change if he wanted to get back to normal... Well, back to how he'd been before... before everything...
No. Jack could never be like that again. He could try and maybe he might just get back to the stage when he'd finally stopped mourning Charlie. But at that point of time he'd had her to numb some of the pain and to let him dream of a future, a future that he'd been blessed to have, however brief some of it had been.
He wandered out of his bedroom moving slowly to the kids' room and glancing inside. Megan lay in her bed fast asleep, her long blonde hair ruffled and messy, snoring softly, her pale face looking innocent and beautiful in slumber. Jack's eyes moved to the bed at the other side of the room. Ryan, as usual, was hanging in a kamikaze position, his duvet in a crumpled heap at the end of his bed where he'd kicked it.
Jack tiptoed inside gently lifting his son back onto the mattress properly and pulling the duvet over him. He smiled softly at the fair haired boy, placing a soft kiss on his forehead. He watched his little boy sleep for a moment before crossing the room to the other bed. He knelt down and kissed his little girl's forehead too, noticing Teddy lying on the floor, her arm stretching out towards him. Jack tenderly lifted the old greying Teddy from the floor and placed him in his tiny daughter's arms as they wrapped around the teddy bear instinctively. Jack sighed and stood again, before making his way out of the room.
He slowly crept downstairs to do something constructive with his time. He wandered into the kitchen and pulled out a box of Froot Loops and a bowl. He poured the sugary cereal into the bowl as the small hoops chinked softly against the porcelain. Jack opened the fridge, its golden light spreading across the kitchen floor, and pulled out the milk carton, opening the cap and splashing the white liquid over the Froot Loops. He replaced the lid and put the carton back in the refrigerator, before opening the cutlery drawer and digging out a spoon.
Jack decided the only way to get back to a healthy physique was to try and eat. He dunked the spoon into the cereal and scooped out a multi-coloured spoonful with a sigh. He really wasn't hungry. Even Froot Loops no longer held appeal to him...
Nothing did these days. Food, drink, TV, his Playstation... God, even the Simpsons. And going to the cabin. And watching Hockey... Nothing. It was as if Jack O'Neill was gone. He didn't even miss the SGC anymore. What had happened to him?
"Loss, O'Neill," he muttered to himself as he closed his eyes, "Loss, after loss, after loss... That's what happened to you."
Every one of the things that had made him `him' now reminded him of... her. That was why they had no appeal to him. That was why he was nothing but a shadow of Jack O'Neill.
He turned on the radio, which was playing some slow soft tunes for those awake at 1am! Jack slumped into one of the kitchen chairs, his cheek resting on the palm of his left hand, elbow on the table, and continued to play with the cereal never eating a mouthful, just dunking in the spoon and tilting it to the side until the slightly-soggy hoops plopped back into the bowl again.
He sighed sadly, pushing the bowl away from him as his eyes glanced around the kitchen. No one would've guessed it was the kitchen of Colonel Jack O'Neill aside from the picture of him and the gang held to the fridge door by a purple dog magnet Ryan had made in 1st grade. She wasn't in that picture. She wasn't in any of the pictures that Jack kept in sight...
The kitchen was clean and strangely organised. Everything had a place and Jack had only just resisted the urge to stick labels on every drawer and cupboard. He'd wanted to in one of those sleepless nights. He always had loads of chores to do and if he didn't he ended up alphabetising something or other. He'd already alphabetised both the large and small bookcases in the Living room and he'd ordered all the CDs, Playstation Games and videos, not to mention ordered his entire `Simpsons' video collection in episode order.
Jack got up taking his bowl of utterly soggy cereal with him, somehow forcing himself to eat a spoonful before deciding he really wasn't hungry, and leaving it on the kitchen side.
On the radio, the man's voice caught his attention, "... third version of the song written by Elton John for Marilyn Monroe..." Jack's body seized. He couldn't listen to this. He went to turn the radio off, but he stopped dead half-way across the kitchen as the tune and words began to flow across the room...
Goodbye Golden Girl, Risking your life to give us hope When there was only evil And alone you had to cope. You lived a secret life Unable to share your brave heart Tell the world what you'd done for them From ending back to start.
And it seems to me that you lived your life Like a Candle in the Wind. Your flame was fading Though you struggled to stay lit. Now we all wish you'd lived To see your daughter crawl But your candle burned out long before You were a legend at all.
A feeling Jack hadn't felt in a long time seized him. Pity. He pitied himself. Jack grimaced at the emotion. Even when things were absolutely terrible he never felt self-pity, but things must be pretty bad for him to feel it. Things were almost unbearable without... without her...
Jack thumped his fist on the cold, kitchen surface, feeling like he wanted to thump it and thump it until he had no more energy left. What a Bastard! He couldn't even call her by her name. Since when had he been stepped into self-pity so deep that he was drowning and there was no way out? He couldn't even say her name...
You sacrificed it all For those who loved you most For the man who saw you When to the world you were a ghost. And even though we try To show you our requited love Our words seem empty And they never seem enough.
And it seems to me that you lived your life Like a Candle in the Wind. Your flame was fading Though you struggled to stay lit. We all know we owe you For a debt we can't repay But we try to show we care for you Every single day.
Goodbye Golden Girl Mother, Sister, Child and Wife You were some people's everything Through times of trial and strife. Goodbye Golden Girl Both intelligent and kind Now your sweet smile's gone But never your beautiful mind.
And it seems to me that you lived your life Like a Candle in the Wind. Your flame was fading Though you struggled to stay lit. Now we all wish you'd lived To see your daughter crawl But your candle burned out long before You were a legend at all...
Jack stared at the radio as the radio guy spoke softly, "Voted best song by the viewers this year leading up to the anniversary of Samantha O'Neill's death. One, I know, that always brings a tear to my eye and sure to most of you guys as well. Elton John with `Candle in the Wind' and now..."
Jack's hand slammed down on the radio, the noise from it ceasing immediately as his jaw gritted the words from the song still revolving around his head. It had been made only a few weeks after she died, after the SGC was exposed and for five years he'd done everything in his power to avoid listening to it and suddenly, he'd been stood an inch from the radio, unable to move the words ensnaring him and trapping him, his heart aching and stinging bitterly. Then suddenly he felt empty. Tired and empty. And even though he had sworn to himself never to listen to it he found himself frozen, his hand hovering a foot away from the device.
He missed her. That went without saying, and quite often it literally did. Many a time he'd sat in silence just thinking of nothing in particular. He could've been anywhere in the country, anywhere in Colorado, anywhere in his house... and suddenly he'd see her ghost in the corner of his eye. He'd look up, but every time there would be an empty room.
An empty man. Jack was an empty man and that hurt so much his breath was literally tortured out of him. Every time he took a breath somewhere in his mind he'd be begging for it to be his last. Some part of his mind, however small, wanted this to be over... He wanted the pain to go, which was impossible. Pain like this didn't just disappear. It could be blocked, but how was he supposed to block it out? It was too strong for even him...
As if he'd gone into Auto pilot, Jack's feet led him out of the room and up the dark stairs in silence towards the door at the end of the hallway. He opened it, the door creaking slightly as the old, dusty staircase was revealed.
He began to climb the stairs, his training allowing him to creep up them without a squeak, before entering the attic. He felt around in the dark near the wall till he found the dusty light switch. He flicked into on and the near-dead light bulb glowed pale yellow, the excessive dust brought up just by him stepping up there, filling the old air with golden sparkles as the dust motes reflected in the light, twirling and pirouetting slowly.
He moved forward to the cardboard boxes surrounding him, wiping dust from the label and a small smile came to his lips before he began moving the boxes out of the attic to the landing before returning to get more.
It was time to stop forgetting. It was time to stop ignoring. It was time to remember...
~~~~~~
Ryan opened his eyes and found a pair of huge, blue eyes centimetres from his face. He let out a small cry and jumped, consequently falling out of bed with a thump. As he lay sprawled on the bedroom floor, staring at the ceiling, a small face looked over him tilting to one side so her face was aligned with his from her position towering over him. He let out a small sigh, "Megan! Don't do that! You scared me silly!"
"I'm sorry, Ryan," her blue eyes widened slightly and she looked genuinely sorry.
He spoke with a small smile, "S'okay. Why were you doing that?"
She clutched Teddy closer to her as she murmured, "The TV's on downstairs."
Ryan frowned, "Megs?"
"Daddy's not in his room and I don't wanna go down there on my own."
Ryan smiled pushing himself up and off the floor. He looked at his little sister clutching dear old Teddy in her arms. Her nightdress, or more precisely one of Dad's old t-shirts, hung around her ankles and covered almost all of her forearms.
Ryan sighed as his eyes fell on the clock and he frowned. It had just gone 5am. He peeked out the curtain. The sun had only just begun to rise. No wonder he was tired! Megan always woke up really early, but she usually let him sleep.
He turned back to his little sister who was now sucking her index finger. She always did that. He had no idea why. Most kids sucked their thumbs, but when Megan was scared or sad she always sucked her left index finger.
Ryan held out his hand, knowing he was going to be so tired at school today, but his little sister was scared and he had to make her feel better. That was Ryan's job and he dutifully did it. He knew that due to the fact he and Megan were always hiding there were days when they couldn't even see their Dad. Ryan also knew that something was wrong with his father. Ryan played dumb, acted as though he was oblivious to it, but he wasn't. How could he be when he could sense something was very wrong, like a dog can smell fear?
Ryan, like most children, didn't remember much about his childhood, but there were two memories that stuck out for some reason. The first was of him snuggling close to a warm comforting body. His mother. He remembered her soft voice as she sung `Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' and he remembered how she smelt like vanilla and he remembered the feeling as her lips touched his forehead... then he remembered her disappearing and lying on his own for a few seconds before suddenly she was back. He remembered snuggling close to her and dozing off again... That was the only memory Ryan had of his mother and, with a stubbornness he'd been told by Uncle Daniel was a common O'Neill trait, he held onto that memory with all his heart.
The second memory stuck firmly in Ryan's head because it was the first time he realised he had to grow up. It was the first time he realised he had a little sister who he had to love and protect. It was the first time he realised he didn't have a mother and it was the first time he realised his Dad needed him. Needed him to be strong, needed him to be a big boy, needed him to look after Megs, but most importantly needed him to be there for him.
Ryan remembered waking up in the middle of the night to the sound of Megan wailing. She'd been about 1 and was sleeping in Dad's room. When the crying didn't stop, Ryan had scrambled from his bed and wandered across the room to his father's bedroom.
His Dad had been sat there in the old rocking chair by the crib, rocking the little girl, trying as hard as he could to calm the wailing baby down. He'd then noticed tears. His Dad was crying. Ryan had known, even at that young age, that his father hated showing weakness above everything else. But his Dad was crying, nearly sobbing.
He remembered how he'd mumbled desperately, `Shh. Shh. Please Megan. Don't cry. Please don't cry, Baby.' He'd been rocking her gently and had moved to the crib winding up the star and moon mobile as it began to play `Twinkle Twinkle Little Star'. And his Dad had began singing softly and the baby stopped crying, dozing back off to sleep.
Ryan remembered his Dad seeing him then and had beckoned him inside. Ryan had climbed into his Dad's arms and he'd snuggled in close with the small baby as his Dad had kissed him on the head and whispered in a weak and tearful voice, `I love you, Ryan...'
Megan stepped forward taking his hand and walking slightly behind him as they left the bedroom and began walking to the stairs. Ryan could hear it now. The TV was on and he could faintly hear the show, although he had no way of identifying it.
Megan stepped closer to him, pressed into his back. He automatically led her down the stairs, keeping her behind him the whole time. The TV became louder and Ryan felt Megan poke his leg. He turned to see she'd snagged his baseball bat and was holding it out to him. He took it and held it in both hands ready to swing as Megan's small hands clung to the rim of his shorts and then moved to the hem of his shirt, as she peered out from behind him. The second he stepped into the living room he dropped the bat. Megan slowly came out from behind him frowning confused as she walked forward cautiously. Ryan followed and watched as his tiny sister went and sat on their Dad's lap without a word.
Ryan moved, sitting close to his Dad as the man wrapped an arm around his shoulder, though Ryan didn't notice. He was transfixed by the images dancing on the television screen...
~~~~~~
"Jack! JACK! NO NO NO! STOP IT!"
Bubbling laughter could be heard in the background as the camera filmed Jack tickling the beautiful woman with short blonde hair and big blue eyes. She was squealing with laughter as Teal'c stepped into the shot, lifting Jack up by the collar and carrying him a few inches from the floor dropping him in the armchair away from the couch with the still hysterically laughing woman on it. The camera followed the two men as Teal'c spoke, "O'Neill, I believe torturing your wife will not lead her to take back her previous comment. Indeed, I believe the past is unchangeable."
Jack just laughed harder as he said, "Teal'c, I wasn't torturing her."
"I think tickling me to death counts as torture," the camera turned back to Sam who was now standing with a small baby Ryan in her arms as she walked over to join them. She pointed to Jack and looked at Teal'c, "Sick him, T!"
Within seconds the Jaffa had Jack in a headlock and the camera was hurriedly given to someone else as Daniel came onto the screen joining Teal'c in tickling him mercilessly. Jack was crying with laughter, "STOP! PLEASE! TEAL'C! DANIEL! SAM! CALL `EM OFF! PLEASE!"
Teal'c stopped after a few more seconds of torture, the equivalent of a Jaffa smirk on his usually stoic face, "I believe you owe Samantha O'Neill an apology."
Jack gasped in air getting his breath back for a few seconds before he grinned at the camera before, throwing himself at his wife's feet theatrically, "Oh, Angel, Sugar, Honey, Princess, Sweetheart, Darling, Love of my Life..."
She hid her smile faking, a look of annoyance as she jiggled the baby in her arms, "Yes, Dear?"
He stared up at her imploringly, "Oh most beautiful wife, forgive me! I was acting in self-defence against a most unjust insult..."
She laughed out loud, sitting on the couch, "I called you `cute'!"
"What I'm trying to say is... I love you and I will never `torture' you again," the camera caught Jack's fingers crossed behind his back.
Sam spoke, "Yeah... well, you better not!" She looked at Daniel, a mischievous glint in her deep blue eyes, "Take Ryan for a second, will you?"
Daniel frowned in confusion, but took the small baby staring at him and making embarrassing `baby' noises, talking in that stupid high-pitched voice that people who are talking to babies always put on.
Sam grinned at Jack playfully and within a second, she'd thrown herself on top of him and was kissing him passionately, both of them lying sprawled on the floor.
"It's like you two can't keep your hands off each other for more than five minutes! Honestly! Get a room!" Janet's voice spoke with an irritated sigh from behind the camera, although she zoomed the shot in to the couple's faces never-the-less!
Everyone laughed loudly except Jack who just stared up into his wife's eyes. And smiled.
~~~~~~
Jack paused the tape, the last image of him staring into Sam's eyes lovingly still on the screen. Her beautiful blue eyes that almost filled the screen. How in God's name had he forgotten them! Forgotten that impenetrable blue that was so deep that he could stare into her eyes and keep falling and falling forever, and he'd never stop. Never.
His eyes remained transfixed and a small voice from his shoulder spoke, "That was Mom."
"Yeah," Jack breathed in reply. Why was his voice so thick and croaky all of a sudden? Jack O'Neill was a master at suppressing emotions. Why couldn't he do it now? Why did he have to feel so lost all of a sudden?
His son shifted at his side, "And me. How old was I?"
"It was your first birthday."
A head popped up in front of the screen, with equally blue eyes and messy blonde hair. Jack didn't realise until that moment that Megan could quite easily have been a reincarnation of his beautiful wife. She spoke in her innocent tone, her eyes wide, as she cocked her head to the side in an expression that reminded Jack of a puppy, "Daddy?"
His eyes finally focussed on the beautiful girl sat on his lap staring into his eyes. No, he wasn't lost. Just temporarily misplaced. He smiled ruffling her hair, "Yes, Sweetie?"
The child spoke with a small frown, "You never laugh like that."
Jack shook his head slightly, as he sighed sadly, "No. No, I don't."
Ryan hugged closer to him for a second and spoke in a wistful whisper, "I don't remember her. Not really."
Jack stood up slowly, holding Megan as her legs clung around him. Ryan stood up beside him. He led them into the kitchen, as he sat Megan at the table and Ryan slid onto the chair next to her.
Jack spoke, busying himself with getting them some breakfast, "She died when you were only 3. You won't remember much about her."
Ryan spoke quietly, although loud enough for his father to hear him, "She used to smell like vanilla and she used to sing `Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star'."
Jack spun around shocked, the bowl clattering to the floor as it slipped from his fingers in surprise. Luckily, it had been Megan's plastic Simpsons bowl and it hadn't broken. Jack shook off his shock and bent down picking up the bowl and continuing in the normal routine, "Yes."
Megan spoke with a tiny frown creasing between her eyebrows, the miniature version of the frown... her mom used to wear, "Daddy? What was Mommy's real name? Melanie said that her Mommy's real name is Charlotte and I didn't know that mommies and daddies had other names."
Jack snorted slightly at the child's ignorance before he realised he had to answer her question. His hands started to tremble and he spilt cereal all over the work surface. He cursed under his breath, when he felt a hand touch his arm.
He turned to look at Ryan as the boy spoke quietly, "I'll do it, Dad."
Jack shook his head, "It's OK. I can manage."
Ryan looked at his sister, a look of authority in his brown eyes, "Megs, it's 6am. Barney is on! Go put on the TV. I'll be there in sec, OK?"
Megan looked worried and stood up slowly before moving into the living room. It was a few seconds later that that obnoxious purple dinosaur began singing that ghastly song, "I love you, You love me..."
`God, they have no clue! Love!?! Yeah, whatever! They have no idea about Love!' Jack pulled a hand through his greying hair, releasing the unexpected wave of anger. And all at some stupid kids show, `What is wrong with me? I'm so cynical! I'm a bitter old man!'
Ryan continued to stare at him meaningfully with his dark eyes, "Dad, do you want me to call Aunty Janet?"
"No, I'm fine," Jack said dismissing his eight-year-old's concern
Ryan shook his head, refusing to let his father fool him, "You look sick."
Jack snorted as he spoke comfortingly, "Honestly, Kiddo. Don't worry."
Ryan watched him suspiciously for a few seconds as Jack cleared up the spilled cereal and successfully filled the bowls with Froot Loops and milk. He passed Ryan his bowl and a spoon as he walked into the living room carrying Megan's own bowl.
The tiny girl sat in the armchair, looking so small that she could've fallen down between the cushion and the arm. Her feet dangled in midair and that shirt he'd given her to wear in bed engulfed her small frame. He smiled softly, placing her bowl on the coffee table for a second. He lifted her up and sat her on his knee, passing her her bowl.
She grinned and snuggled into his arms. He smiled back holding his little girl close. She looked at him, eating a spoonful of Froot Loops before she spoke hesitantly, "Daddy, can we watch Mommy again?"
Jack looked at his daughter surprised. He should've seen it coming. The poor kid had never even seen her Mom. She would naturally be curious. He could be expecting months of questions in the future. And he promised Megan silently he'd try and answer them all. He really would try.
He smiled slightly, "Sure." He turned to Ryan, "You can't go to school today anyway thanks to those stupid Reporters, so... sure. Ryan, take a tape out of that box and put it in the machine."
Ryan spoke cautiously, "You sure, Dad?"
Jack smiled fondly. That was his Ryan. Jack knew how desperately Ryan wanted to watch his Mother again. He could tell by the look in his eyes when he'd been watching the `torture' session from his 1st birthday. But however much Ryan had wanted to watch it, the first thing he'd asked was if it was OK with him. Ryan, having inherited his Mom's brains and unimaginable compassion, obviously realised how much watching that tape had affected him.
Jack nodded, "We should've watched them ages ago. Now put it on."
Ryan nodded, ran over to the cardboard box. He closed his eyes and delved his hand into the box pulling out a tape. He ran to the VCR pushing the cassette in as the next camera footage began to play and Jack's eyes fell on the beautiful face of the woman he loved for the first time in what felt like forever.
~~~~~~
"Dad? Dad!"
Jack felt an insistent tugging on his shoulder and heard the hissing in his ear. He rolled over and began to open his eyes, "OK! I'm up. I'm up."
When his eyes finally opened he saw Ryan stood in front of him looking scared out of his wits as he anxiously tugged on the hem of his pyjama top. Jack suddenly felt wide awake, "Ryan?"
"Something's wrong with Megan..."
No sooner had the words left his son's mouth that Jack was throwing himself out of bed and rushing out of the room. He ran into the kids' bedroom and saw Megan sat in the corner of the room eyes wide, crying and shaking and looking around the room as though replicators were crawling down the walls towards her.
Jack knew his small daughter, despite her obvious intelligence, still believed in monsters under the bed and although her fear of them was great, she wouldn't be that scared, especially with Ryan in the room.
He walked towards her a few paces before the girl cried out, "What's going on? Where am I?"
A strange panic rose in Jack's throat at his daughter's strange tone and he muttered to Ryan, "Call Auntie Janet. Now. Call everyone."
Ryan did what he was told without a sound, running downstairs, knowing without a doubt that this was another strange occurrence in his lifetime that could not be explained. Jack walked closer as Megan began screaming, "LEAVE ME ALONE! DON'T COME ANY CLOSER!"
Jack spoke softly, "Sweetheart. It's me. It's OK."
The girl's eyes widened, "Who are you? Why have you taken me? Where am I?"
Jack finally reached her. He collapsed to the floor hurriedly, desperate to find out what was wrong with his little girl. He stared at her worried, "I'm here, Baby. It's OK. It's just a nightma..."
As he hesitantly reached towards her she went berserk, "They don't know where I am! They don't know where I am! That's why you took me! They won't be able to rescue me!" She began to cry hysterically, her voice shrieking in the usual stillness of the night, "They think I'm dead! They won't come for me!" She looked absolutely terrified, "They can't rescue me..." Her face suddenly contorted with anger and hatred, "I won't tell you anything! I won't betray them!"
Ryan coming back upstairs made Jack jump. He walked over to his son, "Ryan? What happened?"
Ryan spoke scared as he stared at the tiny bundle of 5 year old and nightdress in the corner, "She was tossing and turning in her sleep. I woke her up. I think she was having a nightmare. She kept whining and calling out..."
"What was she saying?"
"She said my name a few times. She called for Uncle Daniel and Teal'c and Auntie Janet. Then she started calling for Jack."
Jack felt his heart stop and the blood rush from his face, "What?"
"Jack. Isn't that your real name?"
Jack spun back to the small girl huddled in the corner crying, ignoring his son's question. She was weeping softly and the tune that she sung in an attempt to calm herself was unmistakable:
"Twinkle, Twinkle little star, How I wonder what you are? Up above the world so high, Like a diamond in the sky. Twinkle, Twinkle little star, How I wonder what you are...?"
Jack crawled close to her and gently wrapped and arm around her. The child flinched and then her eyes met his for a second and she gasped. Tears began to spill faster from her horrified azure eyes as she just stared at him. After a few seconds, she whispered, "Jack? Is that you?" The fair haired child shook her head as if not believing her eyes that stared intently into his own in a strange expression. After a second, she began to speak loudly and desperately, gripping his t-shirt in her small fists, "It's me! It's me! Jack, it's me!"
"I know, Sweetheart," he pulled her closer and into his arms, cradling her in his lap, "Auntie Janet's on her way, OK?"
"Auntie Janet? What? Jack, I don't understand. Where am I? What's going on?"
He stared at her disbelieving as the child looked back at him, looking utterly confused. Then he saw something in the depths of her beautiful eyes that made him jump up, Megan falling ungracefully from his lap. He began to back away, shaking his head slowly as the doorbell rang frantically. Ryan looked between them for a second before speeding downstairs obviously thinking his family had totally lost it.
Jack just stared at the child in dismay, feeling himself trembling. Megan looked around again, "I won't tell you anything, Apophis! This isn't real! None of this is real!"
Jack continued to gawp as he whispered, "Megan, tell me what's wrong!"
She looked at him confused, a heart-broken expression on her face, "Jack, what are you talking about? Megan's dead." She let out a shuddery sigh of pain, "Where's Ryan? Why aren't I in the Hospital? Am I sick? Is that why Janet's coming? It's not Megan, is it? She's not still alive, is she? Please tell me it was a horrible dream, Jack!"
A gasp from the doorway told Jack the other's had arrived. He continued to back away hitting a wall. The small girl stood reaching towards him, tear streaming from her eyes before looking at her hands and body. She turned them over in front of her eyes, her face contorted with horror, "What's happened to me?" Once she spoke she gasped at the voice. She looked around and then her eyes fixed on Ryan stood clinging to the back of Jack's boxer shorts, "Ryan?"
The little boy spoke, "Yeah, Megs. I'm here."
She let out a sob of pain, shock and confusion before she whispered, "Oh my God!" She swayed on her feet, her eyelids fluttering closed, and collapsed to the bedroom floor.
Daniel and Janet ran to the small child as Janet spoke, "She's just fainted. Get her on the bed."
A strong hand fell on Jack's shoulder as Teal'c's voice rumbled, "O'Neill? Why do you fear Megan O'Neill? What is her ailment?"
Jack just gawped noiselessly for a few seconds, before Daniel spoke, "Why did she call you `Jack'? What was she talking about?"
"She's not Megan," Jack murmured, his voice dry and hushed.
"What?" Daniel said looking at the tiny girl being tucked beneath her blankets.
Jack continued to stare at the child, before his eyes rose to Daniel's, "It's... her."
"Her?"
Jack just looked up at Daniel and whispered the name he hadn't spoken in 5 years, "It's... S... It's... S...am... Oh God, Daniel! It's... Sam..."
~~~~~~
"Jack?"
Jack didn't look at his friend. He continued to stare into space not focussing on any particular point. Sam. Sam. Sam. Sam. His Sam...
He gritted his jaw, refusing to cry. He'd done enough crying the past years over the death of his wife. Truth was, now he had no idea if she was alive or dead. He had no idea...
"Jack?" He felt Daniel's fingers land on his forearm and squeeze gently, "Jack, please talk to me."
Jack didn't reply or even acknowledge Daniel's comment. It was Sam. It had to be. He gritted his jaw tighter. He wasn't going to cry. He had no reason to cry. He should be happy. Problem was whatever had happened to Megan she wasn't the one speaking anymore.
"Dad?"
The voice of his son made Jack blink realising even with his jaw gritted that his eyes had begun to water. Slowly he glanced up at his son beside him. Ryan was crying as he whispered fearfully, "What's wrong with Megs? Is she going to die?"
Jack just opened his mouth, unable to reply. He had no idea how to function anymore. It was like his brain had just shut down. He shook his head slowly as Daniel's grip tightened on his forearm for a second, urging him to come back to them.
Ryan's tears fell faster from his dark eyes as the grip on Jack's arm dissipated and Daniel moved to the boy pulling him into his arms, hugging him close. Jack just watched knowing he should be the one comforting his son, but he couldn't. Hell, he was having trouble breathing and moving at all. He couldn't speak words of comfort if he couldn't speak full stop.
After a few seconds, Daniel stood and took Ryan from the room, Jack noticing as Janet stepped into the room although he never looked up at her. She spoke hesitantly, "Jack, I'm going to bring some equipment here, as I'm not sure if Megan can be moved." She waited for a second as if expecting him to agree or argue with her. When he didn't reply she let out a soft sigh, "We'll get to the bottom of this, Jack. Just hang on for me, OK?"
Her voice broke off for a second before she walked forward quickly, kneeling before his chair and staring up into his face with soulful brown eyes that showed all the pain she'd been through in the past years. Not a fresh pain, but a pain that had been decaying as every day went by, becoming stronger and more agonizing as every second passed.
He immediately dropped her gaze unwilling to look into her eyes any longer. Her face was like a mirror, reflecting how he felt, although it was slightly less potent. That expression made his jaw grit with as much force as he could muster, Jack surprised he hadn't broken any teeth yet.
Janet let out a small gasp as if she'd just be burned and clasped his face in her hands forcefully; making his eyes look into hers as she whispered, "Just hang on. Please. Hold on."
Jack screwed his eyes up fiercely although the tear managed to escape and then it happened. The mask broke. Jack's `shell' shattered into pieces and all that was left was the vulnerable man underneath.
His voice was a sob as he murmured, "I don't think I can. Why is this happening?" He was suddenly shouting, "Haven't I already suffered enough! For Christ's sake, Sam's dead. She's DEAD! I SPENT 5 MONTHS BEFORE MEGAN WAS BORN, WATCHING HER GET SICKER AND SICKER KNOWING SHE WAS GOING TO DIE! I KNEW AND THERE WAS NOTHING I COULD DO! NOTHING THAT COULD CHANGE IT!"
He got up from the chair and began thrashing around the kitchen, smashing plates and glasses in a grief-stricken rage, "I HAD TO LIVE THROUGH EVERY DAY KNOWING I WAS GOING TO LOSE HER! I HAD TO KEEP BREATHING AND STAY STRONG EVEN WHEN SHE WAS IN THAT HOSPITAL BED! SHE WAS TERRIFIED OF DYING AND THERE WAS NOTHING I COULD DO! I COULDN'T TAKE IT AWAY, I COULDN'T HELP HER. ALL I COULD DO WAS SIT THERE AND WATCH AS SHE FADED AWAY! SHE... She... She just... faded, Janet... and... and... she wouldn't wake up. Janet, she wouldn't wake up. I called her name, but... She wouldn't wake up... She wouldn't wake up..."
Janet was crying as she stood up and edged towards him whispering, "Jack." She moved closer as Jack's sobbing became so hard that he no longer had the strength to break everything in sight. Her arms wrapped around him and slowly she helped lower him to the floor as he sobbed into her shoulder brokenly. She placed a sisterly kiss on his head as she cried into his hair, "We will get through this together. We are going to find out what's going on and everything's going to be alright. Together. But we can only do it together if you hold on. Don't slip away." Janet let out a shuddery sob before she murmured forcefully, "Sam loved you and she'd want you to get through this. Even if you took it one breath at a time, she'd want you to make it through. Stay strong for her, Jack. Please. Stay strong for Sam."
~~~~~~
Between sleep and awareness was where Sam had been for years, knowing nothing, feeling nothing, just being. All she had were the memories that had been going through her mind over and over. Memories of her life, her love, her `death'...
It was between sleep and awareness that Sam had begun to realise that it hadn't been a nightmare, but had been very real. Everything she'd been through before being forced into this state of being, neither living nor dead, had been real.
Of course, her life with Jack and Ryan hadn't been a nightmare and neither had been getting so ill, although some would probably guess that had been the nightmare she'd been referring to. In fact, Sam had acknowledged whilst in that place of endlessness, she'd been ready to die. Not really happy about it, but not sad about it either, just ready.
She remembered so clearly her son snuggled close to her useless and feeble body as she sung to him. She remembered the way he drifted off to sleep and sucked his thumb, snoring gently. She remembered watching him and her husband sleeping and thinking she was ready to die. She'd never wanted to leave either of them, but now she'd never know if she would've or if the Powers That Be decided to reiterate SG-1's `dumb-luck', allowing her to make a miraculous recovery.
But as she said, she never got the chance to find out.
During her time in between levels of consciousness Sam thought her many shoulda-woulda-couldas, always wondering if she would've lived to see her son grow up, although knowing she'd never find out if she would've died that night or in thousands of nights time when she was old lying in bed beside the man she loved and just drifting off into her last slumber.
All she knew was she'd been taken. Taken away from those she loved by an unexpected captor. She'd been in consciousness for only hours, her last memory of life being of hearing the plan that one day would mean she'd have to fight for the life of a tiny baby girl. The tiny baby girl she'd brought into the world only a few days earlier and who had never drawn her first breath. A baby girl who, at some time in the future would become, for use of a better term, her host...
Then Sam had been essentially downloaded from her body, which was irritatingly absent at the present time, and had been placed inside her baby daughter, who'd been brought back to life for just one purpose... well, two actually.
Firstly, so Sam had a new vessel for her consciousness and secondly, revenge. A way to break Jack O'Neill and Sam sensed it was working and he hadn't even discovered what had become of her real body in its 5, maybe 6, year absence. Yet something was telling her, she...
Sam felt it again. The strange hot sensation that seemed to tingle her nose like when she smelt smoke, telling her she was about to wake again. Now she'd be prepared for it. Now she wouldn't be too busy being terrified, shocked and disorientated to tell them what was going on.
She felt herself being pulled from that place again as she became aware of having a body, the feeling of a duvet covering her, the sensation of a nightdress against her skin... Slowly, she felt able to move and little by little, after a second of deliberation, she opened the eyes that were not her own and woke.
~~~~~~
The person who greeted Sam had not been the one she'd been expecting. She blinked and stared at the young woman in confusion.
"Sam?"
The hazel eyes were familiar and the face... It finally dawned on Sam...
"Cassie? Oh my God! Look at you!"
A grin split the beautiful young woman's face as she laughed gleefully, her eyes filling with tears, "It really is you. Dad was right!"
Sam moved her infant body so she was sat upright and Cassie through her arms around her tightly. Sam felt a tear of her own fall from her eyes, "You... Your... You're so old!"
Cassie laughed again, although a few tears lined the contours of her face with liquid as she pulled away, "It's been 5 years, Sam."
Sam nodded and stared down at the 5-year-old's cute palm and podgy fingers. She sighed softly, "I... I've missed so much..."
Cassie shivered slightly as she swept a runaway strand of light brown hair from her moistened cheeks, "When you died, something in all of us just... left, y'know? Jack didn't know what to do with himself any more..."
Another tear found its way from the eyes of her daughter as she thought of the almost horrified look on Jack's face when he'd realised she was in their baby girl's body. After a second she murmured, "I never died. I was abducted before I actually died. There was a plot to enact revenge on me, but Jack in particular. I... I was taken from my body and placed inside Megan..."
"How?" Cassie's voice showed her absolute confusion and disgust at the thought.
Sam spoke slowly, "Thor had no way of knowing, it was so perfectly planned... My consciousness was placed in the Asguard device... the one that brought Megan back to life. As it was doing so I was.... `downloaded' into her..." Sam shuddered in revulsion at the horrific violation that had been enacted on her. After a second she continued, "I couldn't gain control of her body. Her mind was not developed enough... I wasn't expecting to resurface so soon, if at all. The way he put it, I thought Megan would have to be in her teens... only then could she have that high a capacity to allow me to surface..."
Cassie's eyebrows frowned as she murmured hesitantly, as if not wanting an answer, "Who's `he'?"
"Cassie..." Sam whispered, in a voice that was not her own, "You have to tell everyone that... that Apophis has my body and that he is currently getting his revenge. On Jack in the worst way he possibly could..."
Cassie gasped in shock, "Apophis? How? What's his revenge?"
Sam's vision rose and met Cassie's frightened face as she said tears trailing her face, "Either he has to get by body back from Apophis, whatever that Snakehead has done with it, and find someway of getting me back in my own body... or..."
Her body shook as she broke down, her voice shaking, "Or Me and Megan will die and this time nothing will be able to bring us back."
~~~~~~
Part Five
It was only when she slapped him that Jack finally listened to what Cassie was frantically trying to tell him. As he'd refused to go see `Sam', she'd had to tell him what was going on. He hadn't listened, disagreed with every word she'd said and it had obviously irritated her.
Her hazel eyes glared at him, "Jack! Your Wife and your Daughter's lives are at stake! Will you listen to me?!"
Jack stared back at the kitchen floor as he pulled a hand over his unshaven cheek, scratchy with stubble, trying to numb the pain. Cassie could slap harder than a guy could've punched!
The young woman spoke again, obviously not a bit sorry for slapping him, "Now you listen to me and you listen good! If we don't find Sam's body and find a way to get her back inside it both her and Megan are going to die!" Cassandra's eyes began to fill with tears, Jack could hear it in her voice, "And I can't lose them both again! I can't lose you again!"
Jack looked up at her in surprise, "Lose me?"
Cassie nodded and sniffed, her tears disappearing as she spoke seriously, "I lost my real father when I was barely old enough to walk. I lost my mother to a disease that every single person from my planet died from except me. I lost Sam, one of my dearest friends and as close to me as a mother. I lost you when you lost her."
Jack blinked and murmured, "I'm sorry, Cass."
She nodded obviously having experienced enough pain in her life that was only just over two decades old. She spoke quietly, "A year ago, I almost lost Rya'c and it nearly killed me..."
Jack remembered the incident, remembering how that had been the point where they had all realised there was love between the two young people. Rya'c, Teal'c and Bray'tac had all gone on a mission to protect a camp of Jaffa rebels from an attack from Apophis Bray'tac had heard of through his contacts. When they arrived they'd almost been too late. The gliders and various other Goa'uld ships had arrived minutes afterwards. The evacuation of the camp had been an overall success although Rya'c had returned mortally wounded, Teal'c only slightly better off. The Jaffa didn't possess the medical facilities to care for him so Dr. Fraiser and a medical team were requested for...
Cassie continued, obviously emotionally drained as she whispered, "I was terrified when I heard what had happened to him. I love him with all my heart and I didn't want him to die and for me to end up like you did." Jack was about to object, but Cassie continued regardless, "Don't deny it! You died the same time she did. On Tuesday, when you brought my mom home, I thought you were back from the dead," she stared at him with her piercing hazel eyes in an expression that almost broke his heart, "And now you're just going to give up. Die all over again. I know you will because losing Megan, losing Sam and losing the chance to have her alive and well again will kill you. You don't have to be an Air force Colonel or a top astrophysicist to see it."
Slowly, Cassie rose and moved to the door of the kitchen. She hesitated in the doorway, her hands holding the doorframe, without looking back, "And I thought you should know. Apophis did this as revenge. He has Sam's body and without a doubt is taking his revenge on `her' somewhere out there..." Cassie looked over her shoulder at him, "If you loved her, you'd go out there, find that sick bastard, kick his arse and get her body back. The Jack O'Neill I knew would've done that, at least to respect her wishes..."
"And what are her wishes?"
Cassie turned away again and her hands slid from the doorframe. She stepped from the room leaving it in an eerie silence after she whispered, "That her daughter can live."
~~~~~~
It was early morning and Jack, as usual was restless. He climbed from beneath his sheets and made his usual pilgrimage to his dresser, pulling on a baggy t-shirt and a pair of jeans from his wardrobe. He glanced at his son, snuggled up in a sleeping bag on a blow up bed at the other end of his room. Ryan hadn't wanted to sleep in the same room as... her. She was neither his daughter nor his deceased wife and so he had nothing to call her.
He slipped out of the room and stood in the hallway for a second. His eyes flicked from the stairs to the door of the kids' bedroom and back again. He sighed softly and then moved to the door that was ajar. He glanced inside silently pushing the door open. It swung back without a squeak and Jack stepped into the room.
His eyes fell on his daughter's body. She lay on her side in a ball, one hand placed palm down on the empty space of pillow beside her beautiful face. She was neither sucking her thumb nor hugging Teddy; both things reminded Jack that this was not his little girl. Her closed eyes had greyish circles beneath them and she looked pale her face taking on an expression that Jack only associated with one person. It was the expression Sam used to wear whilst she slept after she'd been crying hard. A tiny frown between her eyebrows, the corners of her mouth curving down ever so slightly, her jaw clenched even in sleep...
Jack realised for the hundredth time how much Megan looked like her mother. His eyes tingled although not enough for him to cry. He released his breath in a soft sigh as he slowly leant against the doorframe, folding his arms across his chest in a position Jack guessed he'd learnt from Daniel.
He watched her sleep for a few minutes, barely daring to breathe. He watched as Megan's hand moved slightly against the pillow. Her fingers flexed slightly as if she was trying to grip the pillow, trying to reach for someone who wasn't there...
He couldn't bear this anymore. He turned around and began to move towards the stairs...
"Do you still love her?"
The whispered statement made him jump. He spun on his heels to see Cassie, her hair tousled and she was stood by the spare bedroom door, in her pyjamas. She'd stayed the night just in case something happened to Sam/Megan again and suddenly Jack wondered just how long the woman had been stood watching him with knowing eyes.
Jack hissed back in her direction, "You made me jump!"
Cassie spoke again, her voice serious, "Jack, tell me! Do you still love her?"
Jack gulped slightly, his eyes moving to the floor as he relished the silence for as long as he could. He sighed as he murmured, "More than anything. Cass, I have to go. I have to go now. I don't care how, but I'm going to the SGC and I'm going to find that bastard. I'll make him pay and I'll get her body back because I can't live without her anymore. I just... can't."
A watery smile came to Cassandra's lips as she whispered hurriedly, "Go. Take Dad. Go to Teal'c and Rya'c. Sam told me that Apophis has got her locked up in a fortress somewhere. The Jaffa resistance might know where. Just... be safe!"
Jack jogged to her, kissed her on the cheek and pulled her into a hug before he spoke quietly, "Take care of my family." When she nodded he sped downstairs and straight out his front door into his truck.
Cassie stood on the landing and sighed softly. She wiped a tear from her face...
"He loves me...?"
Cassie jumped to see Megan... Sam stood in the doorway of her room. She was also in tears although she was silent for a few minutes just staring into space before she murmured, "To me it feels like second since we were sat in the hospital and he was telling me not to be afraid. Strange how after all this time he...?"
Cassie watched the woman in a child's body as she glanced at her and spoke with a tiny smile, "Night Cassie. Sweet dreams."
As quickly as she appeared, she vanished back into her bedroom, softly closing the door behind her, leaving Cassie alone in the corridor. She smiled again to herself sniffed slightly and then padded back into the spare room, glad to have made Jack realise his own denial and happy that Sam knew her husband still loved her.
She collapsed on the bed with a small sigh and crawled beneath the duvet as she closed her eyes, drifting off into her dreams. Memories filled her mind. Sam and Jack getting married, her parents getting married, Rya'c proposing to her... before her memories mixed with things to come and she fell into oblivion.
~~~~~~
The gate spun, Davis calling out the usual `Chevron One Encoded' and so on and so forth as Jack stood before the alien device and marvelled at its beauty.
It had been so long since he'd last stood here. Just under 6 years ago, when Teal'c had left back to Chulak. At the time there had been a lot of racism towards the Jaffa and although the main opinion of the world was that Teal'c was a hero, there had been a minority who'd tried to kill him more than once. Earth had become in Teal'c's words, `Not only a jeopardy for my own health, but a most unpleasant experience.'
"You OK?"
Jack glanced at his best friend and smiled slightly. Daniel stood, dressed in BDUs with a P-90 hanging around his neck and a coffee cup in his hands. Daniel looked so exhausted and Jack felt sorry for dragging the guy out of bed at 3 in the morning, but he had to know... He had to know if he could save her...
"I'm fine..." Jack said softly, his eyes moving back to the magnificent ring before him. The Stargate locked the last chevron, Earth, and with a spectacular whoosh of light, sound and blue, it came to life in a way that Jack had almost forgotten. His mind filled with wonderment, the mechanical functions of the gate becoming more poignant. How on Earth could he have forgotten this? How could he have forgotten the feeling of excitement and anxiety as he stood in the gate room with Teal'c, Daniel and Sam? How could he have forgotten it?
The SGC had been his life. He'd always thought he'd be lost without it, but truth was it was his team and Sam who made the SGC was for him, and without any of them it became nothing more than a job.
"You don't look fine," Daniel said, gulping down the last of his coffee.
Jack spoke, a small frown creasing his brow, "Well I will be fine..."
They began to walk up the ramp, their air force regulation boots clanking slightly, a few SFs saluting, Sgt. Davis speaking through the mike: "Good luck, Sir. I hope you find her."
Daniel spoke in an undertone as they reached the Gate and Jack hesitated, "Jack, you do know that..." Daniel sighed softly and as Jack glanced at him he gave a strained smile, "Just don't get your hopes up."
Jack nodded, his lips pursing into a thin line as he stepped into the wormhole.
~~~~~~
Teal'c stood waiting to see his closest friends for the first time in 6 years. It was stood here in the cool darkness of winter night time that Teal'c regretted not seeing his friends enough. He'd been here on Chulak for 6 years and that was too long a time by far.
The recent events in O'Neill's life had had a strange impact on the Jaffa. He'd had a strange dream, a nightmare after he'd heard the news the previous day. A nightmare of Samantha O'Neill, alone and scared at the hands of Apophis and then flashbacks of when Daniel Jackson's Abydonian wife, Sha're, had been chosen to become the host to Ammounet.
Teal'c changed his position slightly as his mentor spoke from beside him, "They will come through shortly."
He nodded slightly and turned to Bray'tac. He gave a small smile, "I cannot tempt you to accompany us on this quest for Samantha O'Neill, Old man?"
Bray'tac chuckled and pulled his cloak tighter around him, a small wisp of water vapour leaving his mouth, "I am too old, Teal'c. If I could fight as well as I could 10 years ago, I would be at your side when you saved Samantha O'Neill. But I can not and it is not 10 years ago, when Samantha O'Neill was Major Carter and you were all fighting alongside each other as SG-1," Bray'tac sighed slightly, looking much frailer to Teal'c in the reduced light, "My honour is pained that I can not be there to assist you, especially when I owe Samantha O'Neill my life many times over. I regret that I shall not be able to repay that debt to her, except with the knowledge of where she may be detained..."
Teal'c looked at his teacher, "She would be most grateful to you and the loyal Jaffa who gained that information and risked his life to send it to us."
Bray'tac nodded, "I was surprised how quickly I got a reply and even more shocked that it was the information we required."
With a sudden explosion of light from the gate, both men looked at the ring in awe. When the two figures staggered down the steps and the blinding blue and white light disappeared, Teal'c felt a wide smile form on his face.
He stepped towards the two men, embracing both of them before pulling back, "It is most pleasing to see you both again."
O'Neill gave a small, tired smile, "And you, Teal'c."
Teal'c took in the appearances of his two dear companions. Daniel Jackson's hair was ruffled and messy, as was O'Neill's, who was greyer than when Teal'c had last seen him. They both had tired circles beneath their eyes and had obviously left Earth at an extremely early hour in the morning, 3am if Teal'c's calculations were accurate.
O'Neill seemed much older and wearier. Teal'c knew how hard the past several years must have been for him, Teal'c yet again regretting that their reunion had not come sooner and been under slightly less urgent circumstances.
Daniel spoke with a yawn as he shivered slightly in the chill, Teal'c noticing some signs of ageing on his face also, "Do you know where she is?"
Teal'c nodded towards Master Bray'tac as the old man spoke, "Dr. Jackson, Colonel O'Neill. It is an honour to meet with you both after so long."
They both inclined their head respectfully as Jack murmured softly, his voice husky with obvious desperation and emotion, "What do you know? Where is she?"
The elderly Jaffa spoke, beckoning for them to follow him as he began walking back towards the town; "You must rest for a few hours and eat something before we discuss how you may rescue her." He glanced at the strong Tau'ri beside him, "You appear very fatigued and that will not help you help her."
Jack shook his head and stopped only a few yards from the Gate, "We can sleep when she's back home and safe. Please Bray'tac. Is she alive?"
Bray'tac sighed with a tired expression on his face, "Yes. She is alive. From what my contact has told me, she's alive. In fact, it was only at some time between the past month and this week that she has been revived successfully. What I gathered from my servant undercover in that fortress is that Apophis has been trying to erase her memory..."
Daniel frowned, "But how can that be? Sam's consciousness is in Megan."
Bray'tac nodded, "Apparently, something of her remains for it has been very difficult for Apophis to brainwash her, most likely for the purpose of giving her a Goa'uld..."
"But that makes no sense either," Daniel said, his frown deepening further as he folded his arms characteristically, "Why would he have to brainwash Sam for her to become host to a Goa'uld?"
Teal'c spoke up, his deep melodic voice a comfort to Jack O'Neill, "It seems that the fragment of Samantha O'Neill still present in her body is most reluctant to be implanted. Although the Jaffa who is hidden amongst Apophis's serpent guards could not relay much information to us, we were told that the Goa'uld is Apophis's lover, Kephni, and that in turn the Goa'uld becomes extremely irritated when they try to introduce her into Samantha O'Neill's body."
Daniel sighed, as if the situation was exasperatingly illogical, "Why would a Goa'uld reject a body? It makes no sense!"
Teal'c spoke again, "We shall see if our secret operative can relay anything more." He turned to the ancient Jaffa beside him, "Master Bray'tac, are you capable of returning to your abode alone?"
He nodded with a chuckle, "I shall cope, Teal'c."
Daniel spoke up, "Give my regards to Rya'c, won't you?"
Bray'tac inclined his head, "The next time I see you, it shall be at your daughter and Rya'c's wedding, no doubt." He nodded and then spoke to the two Tau'ri, "Good luck on your quest and I hope you are able to save Samantha."
O'Neill didn't reply as Daniel Jackson glanced at him for a second and then smiled at the Jaffa Master, "Thank you for all your help, Bray'tac."
Bray'tac smiled in return before slowly continuing his way down the path towards the Jaffa settlement, his age finally catching up with him. A small smile came to Jack's face as he remember the time he'd first met Bray'tac and the 112 year old man had won in a fight due to Jack underestimating him. He'd never made the same mistake again.
Teal'c placed a hand on O'Neill's shoulder before turning them back to face the Gate, the metal glinting in the chilled moonlight, "Hurry. We must leave immediately."
Teal'c stepped up to the DHD and began to slowly press the chevrons, each one lighting up in that familiar orange colour, a swishing clunk following every time his fingers pressed one.
Teal'c spread his palm out, pressing the glowing amber hemisphere in the centre; the illusion of water that was made of electric-blue and dazzling-white energy erupted from the metal ring.
Jack gripped his P-90 tightly in his hands as the three of them walked slowly up to the event horizon and through to the other side...
The sound of around 60 staff weapons engaging met them as they re-emerged in a forest, the canopy only broken by a Goa'uld fortress, monstrous and enormous, gilded and covered in serpent gargoyles...
~~~~~~
They were marched slowly towards the ominous gate in the shape of a golden cobra, its mouth wide and its fangs sharp, metal doors within its throats opening slowly as the score of Jaffa escorting them pushed and shoved them forwards.
They'd walked for around half an hour through the forest before they'd finally reached the fortress and Daniel realised that now they were captured they'd have no chance of escaping this place. When he said fortress he used the name loosely! This place was almost like a town confined to one 20 storey building.
They were dragged into a throne room and Jack's eyes fell upon a face he'd last seen being transported out of another room, his face contorted with anger and his eyes flashing white...
A completely different expression was on his face now. An expression that was more worrying than any look of rage he could've given them. His eyes were glittering with gleeful malice and Jack prayed that this had all been a lie. Jack prayed that he hadn't got Sam's body. He would rather his wife remained dead for all eternity than for Apophis to be torturing her.
He grinned, "I have been expecting you would arrive eventually, although I had no idea you were still in business." He smirked nastily as he turned his back to them, his gold and black robe swishing along the floor, "I'd heard that SG-1 had disbanded...?"
They all knelt in silence until Apophis turned to face them again, looking at Jack in slight surprise, "No remarks, Colonel? Nothing to amuse me with?"
Jack didn't answer. Apophis just chuckled, his alien voice sounding unpleasant, "No matter. You shall all talk when I have you tortured." He grinned again and looked at his Jaffa, "Take the Shol'va and Dr. Jackson to a cell. I wish to talk with Colonel O'Neill."
The Jaffa holding Daniel and Teal'c began dragging them back out the way they'd come, Jack still in a kneeling position dreading what Apophis wanted to talk to him about. He knew who this would involve and Jack's fear increased. What if Bray'tac had been wrong? What if she was dead? Or worse, was actually a Goa'uld? Jack knew he'd die on the spot if that was true...
Apophis grinned horribly, "It has been a while, Tau'ri. I was quite disappointed to discover you'd retired from the field of battle. Your attempts at destroying me were somewhat amusing..."
Jack gritted his jaw, refusing to say something stupid, knowing that if he said something to anger Apophis enough, as he'd be likely to do, Daniel, Teal'c and maybe even his wife would be in danger.
Apophis seemed to be frustrated by Jack's unwillingness to respond and tried again, "Your miniscule brain seems to have deteriorated even more. Did you not think that the Gate would be guarded whilst you were planning your pathetic excuse for a rescue mission? You have become old and weak since we last saw one another, but then again the last time we met you were an adolescent. Now my revenge for your insolence shall be complete!"
Jack looked up at the Goa'uld, dressed in a serpent headdress, his dark eyes glaring up at the man who had caused him 6 years of pain without his wife. Jack's rage was welling within him, making him want to get revenge to all the suffering he had cause him and his kids.
Jack was about to lunge at the man when he bared his teeth in gleeful grin, "Would you like to meet my new Queen, Colonel?"
Realisation hit Jack as he deflated, Apophis turning slightly towards an entrance that was draped over with a scarlet veil. Jack's eyes fixed on the drape as it moved, the Jaffa stood at the curtain pulling it across. His heart was pounding in his chest as he whispered a soft prayer, "Please... not yet..."
A woman stepped into the room escorted by two Jaffa. She was dressed in typical Goa'uld style clothes, skimpy, but unusually, white. The extremely unusual thing was the woman dressed in the clothes. Her golden hair was the same, her body was the same, but her eyes were different. They held a bizarre, bemused expression. The woman Jack knew, the woman Jack loved, was no longer there; although Jack could also tell she wasn't a Goa'uld... yet.
He stared at her and his heart stopped, his breath having been taken away the moment she stepped into the room. She had moved gracefully, no longer hobbling slowly with crutches helping her to make every step. Her skin was golden brown, no longer showing the signs of her sickness. She looked so beautiful that Jack was speechless and for one moment forgot completely where he was. He just stared at her, tears prickling in his eyes.
She stared back at him in confusion, as if she should know him, but didn't, her small frown crinkling her perfect skin. Her eyes never left him as Apophis walked over to her. He spoke sickly, "Isn't she beautiful?"
Jack felt anger suddenly explode within him as his situation came flooding back. Apophis had taken her. Apophis had put her mind in Megan. Apophis had taken her body and made whatever part of Sam was left into his Queen. And it was Apophis who stroked a hand down Sam's bare back grinning with what could only be interpreted as `Ha Ha I've got your wife' or as close to the Goa'uld equivalent you could get! Jack began to fight wildly against the Jaffa holding him, "You Son-of-a-bitch! Let her go!"
Apophis smirked nastily, "Take him to the cells!"
Jack shouted to her, his eyes watery, struggling uncontrollably as the Serpent Guards dragged him from the room, "SAM! IT'S ME! IT'S JACK! FIGHT IT, SAM! DON'T LISTEN TO HI-...!" The doors slammed behind them as her blue eyes didn't move from the spot he'd been in moments ago.
Kephni turned to Apophis slowly as she whispered, "Who was that man, My Love?"
Apophis dismissed her question with a nonchalant wave of his hand in the direction the man had been taken in, "He is one of the prisoners. He is of no importance..."
She could tell he was lying. He always looked at her face when he spoke to her, but he had avoided her eyes then. He was lying...
"That name he screamed was familiar," she said persistently, "He called me `Sam'."
Apophis spoke to her in a menacing tone, "Sam is the name of their leader. We tortured him to death long ago. That man has obviously lost his mind from the torture. He is of no importance." Apophis spoke silkily again, removing the threat from his voice, "Now come with me and we sha..."
"He knew I was female and he didn't look like he'd been tortured..." She interrupted, not allowing this to be forgotten as something flickered in her mind. She turned to Apophis, speaking slowly as her only memories of her past seemed to float up from the dark recesses of her mind, "His name is... Jack. Jack... O... O'Neill. Sam was his 2IC. Sam is his... his wife..." She stopped in shock as she realised, pulling her hand from his and taking a few steps backwards, "I am Samantha O'Neill!"
Apophis's face contorted with what looked close to anger, "Jaffa Kree!" She felt hands clasping her arms, she struggled as she heard Apophis say something in Goa'uld and something hard hit her around the head.
~~~~~~
As Jack was thrown back into the cell, Daniel and Teal'c watched him in silence. His body made a soft thump as he hit the stone floor. He let out a soft groan as the wind was knocked out of him for a moment, the rusty hinges on the bars squeaking as the Serpent Guards closed and locked it again. After they'd gone, Jack lifted himself off the ground and walked over to them as they waited for the answer to their silent question...
Jack never looked at them as he faced the wall placing his hands flat against the icy stone. He lowered his head, pressing his forehead on the stone between his hands, squeezing his eyes shut for a few seconds. He sighed painfully and then whispered his voice hoarse and unusually shaky, "He's got Sam..."
"Oh God! Is she alright? Did you see her? I mean, is she... alive?" Daniel asked in quick succession as the man collapsed against the wall and slid back down to the cold floor.
Jack stared at them and spoke slowly, obviously in shock and pain at what he'd just witnessed, "I don't know how, but that's her body and... and it's alive."
Daniel spoke softly, in absolute shock, "That's impossible...!"
Jack snapped at the man, "Daniel, I think I know what my wife looks like!" He took a deep breath before he murmured, "She's his new Queen."
"I didn't mean it's impossible for it to be her! I meant that how can she be alive if she has no... no soul?" The rhetorical question was left hanging for a few moments before Daniel spoke in a matter-of-fact tone, "Well, it makes sense that Apophis would make her his queen. He did tell us when we were turned into teens that she'd make a good queen..."
Jack sighed sadly, "She's not a Goa'uld yet, but she doesn't know who she is."
"How are you sure of this?" Teal'c asked as he stared out of the metal bars of the cell.
Jack gave a slight shudder, "For a start she wouldn't have let them dress her up like that, secondly, she would've been fighting like crazy and thirdly, she wouldn't have let Apophis within ten feet of her. Not to mention we think that her... consciousness is in Megan..."
Daniel winced and then nodded, "So, she doesn't know who she is?"
"Not a clue," Jack spoke, his voice dull and lifeless; the man obviously still recovering from the shock of seeing his `dead' wife, "And soon he'll implant her with a snake and she'll totally cease to be the Sam we know, if she's not already lost to us."
They sat in silence for a moment before Daniel jumped up, "Jack!"
"What?" Jack looked at him in shock.
Daniel thumped his fists on the wall, "We've got to get her out of here!"
"I know that, Danny..."
"No. We have to get her out of here NOW! You don't understand!"
"You don't know how often I hear..." Jack paused and then spoke slightly worried, "Daniel?"
"A Harcesis child! Apophis wants a Harcesis child! That's why he made Sha're his wife, that's why he has Sam!"
"Daniel Jackson is most likely correct, O'Neill. Apophis most likely procured Samantha O'Neill for such a reason. Also his anger with you and Samantha O'Neill would also give the impression that his actions are a means of revenge."
Jack pulled a hand through his hair, "Well, this makes things more complicated."
~~~~~~
As her eyes opened she wondered where she was. She looked around confused. She couldn't remember who she was or... anything. Her mind was blank and she glanced around fearfully like a trapped animal, unsure of whether she was safe or in jeopardy.
A face leant over hers. She recognised it vaguely. The man spoke as his eyes glowed, "My Love, you have awoken."
"Who are you?"
The man smiled a pearly white smile, his almost metallic voice speaking gently, "I am Apophis and you are my Queen, Kephni."
That sounded familiar as well. Kephni nodded, "I am."
The man grinned and Kephni suddenly felt a wave of dislike for the man although it was replaced with her love for him.
He held out his hand and helped her up from the bed. As she clasped the blanket around her naked body, she looked around. She was in a golden temple filled with deep blood-red drapes and furnishings. The room had a heavy stench of incense and was hazy through the slight smoke billowing from the candles, Kephni assumed were the source of the rich smell. As she glanced around the room her eyes fell on a tank. She shivered at the sight of the serpent-like silhouettes squealing from behind the frosted glass, half hidden by a scarlet curtain.
He spoke to the few women in the room, "I wish you to take my Queen to her room and dress her in her usual attire," he turned and gave her a smile, "And then my Queen will join me in the throne room."
The women bowed, "Yes, My Lord."
As Apophis left Kephni felt slightly awkward and confused. She loved him greatly, but somewhere in the back of her mind she felt a great hatred and disgust for him.
The women dressed her in a dressing gown and led her to her chamber. It was a beautiful room, filled with fiery drapes and golden ornaments, very similar to the temple, except more suited for her to live in. The woman sat her on the soft sheets of her bed and then helped her to adorn her robes. They were also very beautiful, but unusually white compared to what she'd already seen.
After she was fully dressed, they led her to the throne room. Apophis was stood speaking to two men in a familiar language, though she couldn't place what they were saying.
The men were old and she assumed they were some of Apophis's advisers. One man was extremely tall and thin with a long wispy grey beard that would've served for a scarf! He had big bushy eyebrows and dark, formidable eyes that even though they were light blue in colour almost turned indigo from the cruelty in them. The other was shorter and stockier. He had dark brown eyes and a stern face although for some reason Kephni did not see the same hatred and cruelty in his face as she did in the other man's. He was balding, but the hair he did have was dark brown.
She watched their conversation curiously for a moment before Apophis turned to her. He smiled and his eyes looked her up and down before he spoke her name, "Kephni."
He dismissed the advisors as she spoke, "My Lord Apophis," she bent her head respectfully as he walked over to her. He lifted her face up so she stared into his. He stroked her cheek gently as he spoke in his low metallic-like voice, "Would it please you to be led around my impenetrable fortress, My Love?"
She spoke devotedly, "Yes, My Lord."
He closed the gap between them and began kissing her tenderly, before he spoke in that language. Six Jaffa came over and stood by their sides. Apophis took her arm and said, "I shall show you the power of my indestructible fortress."
~~~~~~
Kephni was led all around the base and there was only one point when they stopped. It was at the top of a flight of stairs that led downwards, underground.
Apophis spoke in an undertone to the guards and then they walked down the steps. Kephni felt an unusual feeling in the pit of her stomach as they stepped into the cold, torch lit dungeon. She past cells with up to six tortured and mutated men within. She felt sick and yet she felt a strange amount of pleasure from witnessing the suffering of the prisoners. They walked past more cells as Apophis told her what the prisoners had done to deserve punishment. Kephni felt herself hating the men in the cells.
"Sam?"
She past a cell and looked inside, as the man spoke to her. Three men were in there the one who'd spoken stepped forward. The torchlight illuminated his kindly face. He wore glasses and was staring at her with anxious blue eyes. He spoke a small smile on his lips, "Sam, it's me. Daniel. Remember?"
As another man joined him at the bars, she realised she knew them. No names or who they were, but she knew they were her friends. The other man stared at her, "Samantha. It is I, Teal'c. Do you not recall us?"
Apophis spoke venomously, spitting at the men in the cell, "My Love, these traitors kidnapped you and tried to harm you. I locked them up and their leader was tortured to death."
She stared at them for a moment and then took a step away from the bars. She glared at them as though they were lepers; "I refuse to stay in this disgusting place any longer! My Lord, take me away from these repulsive prisoners!"
The look on the two men's' faces was that of disbelief and the man with glasses murmured, "You've got to remember, Sam. You have to get out of here. We don't care if you leave us here. Just get out!"
She walked away with the guards and then glanced back at the cell. There was now one more man by the bars. She knew him more clearly than the others. She did not know who he was or why he stared at her. She stopped dead and watched him for a moment. He didn't say a word and just stared back. His dark eyes spoke to her. Volumes and volumes in one glance, though she could not understand the feelings in her heart as she read that look. He released a pained and heartbroken sigh and continued to stare at her, his dark eyes shimmering more than usual, as Apophis grabbed her arm and almost dragged her up the flight of steps and out of the dungeon.
He pulled her chin so she faced him fiercely, "Kephni, why did you stop?"
"Those men frightened me..." She lied and then stared at the floor as she said, "I want them moved to the lowest dungeon and to be tortured well!"
Apophis's horrible grin returned and she could see slight relief in his cold eyes, "I shall have them moved immediately. They are already being tortured well, so there is no need for you to worry, My Love. They will suffer."
She spoke in a cold, alien voice that was not her own, "Good."
~~~~~~
"Jack, will you stop that? We're already going to be tortured; we don't need to pay damages for the holes you're burning in the floor!"
Jack stopped pacing and collapsed by the wall, "While we're down here, Apophis could be doing... anything to her. I can't just sit here!"
He jumped up and thumped his hands on the bars. There was a loud, resounding clang that echoed through the prison making their neighbours scream and moan even louder for a few moments before they all calmed down again.
Jack laid his head on the bars and closed his eyes as Daniel spoke firmly, "Jack, rest. We're going to need a whole lot of energy to get out of here and we're barely fed anything so we need to conserve what we get. Try to get some sleep."
Jack spun around and there was a slight fear in his eyes, "I don't think I can sleep, Daniel."
Daniel knew what thoughts must be haunting his friend, as they were probably similar to the ones that plagued Daniel. Yet another woman Daniel cared about was being used by that Monster and he was locked in this cell. Useless.
He spoke, trying to tell Jack with the tone of his voice he felt the same, "Then don't. Just sit down for a while."
Jack collapsed in a heap and let out a small sigh. He drew his knees up to his chest and rested his chin on them as he stared through the bars at one of the flickering torches.
Daniel sighed. He obviously hadn't been the only one to notice the entry laceration at the side of Sam's neck when she'd passed, not to mention her behaviour was pretty typical for Goa'uld.
The strange thing was it hadn't healed and she'd been speaking normally. Also Daniel could've sworn he'd seen recognition in her eyes as she'd stopped by their cell. Then of course she'd spoken in a disdainful tone that had been all too familiar though she had not spoken with the voice of a Goa'uld.
Apophis had begun to lead her away, when Jack stepped up to the bars. Sam had turned to look at him and she'd just stopped dead for a moment staring at him before she was tugged up the stairs.
Daniel pulled a hand through his hair. She definitely had that thing inside her, but something told Daniel it didn't have full control of her and that something of Sam must still be in there. Daniel wondered if she knew who she was. He doubted it. Apophis must've found a way to transfer all of Sam into Megan's body. How and when, no one could know.
Problem with that theory was that when she'd seen them she'd stopped. When Daniel had said her name she'd turned to look at them. She at least recognised her name although maybe she didn't realise it.
`So Sam is still in there...' he thought to himself. He glanced at Jack, eyes closed and obviously feeling useless, a feeling Jack O'Neill hated above all others. Daniel watched his friend as a thought came to his head, `And she still knows who she's really in love with.'
It was most likely Apophis had just subdued the memories and then implanted her with the Goa'uld, although the Goa'uld hadn't taken control, which was strange. Daniel couldn't explain why it hadn't. There would've been no resistance from Sam as she hadn't the faintest idea who she really was.
Daniel's musing was interrupted as some Jaffa opened their cell. They walked in and fastened their wrists in heavy manacles. They didn't speak as the Jaffa took them from the cell.
They were led away from the staircase leading up to the main part of the fortress, and dragged to the other end of the dungeon. There was a pitch black stairway that led down. Daniel glanced at Jack fearfully. Daniel could see that Jack was scared, if only slightly. His jaw was gritted anxiously, but there were no other signs and Daniel could tell it annoyed the Jaffa slightly.
They were led down as one Jaffa walked at the front with a flaming torch. It didn't seem to be able to light the complete darkness and instead seemed to lift the impenetrable gloom slightly. Daniel stumbled down the last few steps, but was kept upright by the iron grip of their captors.
He noticed about five deserted cells, all filthy and so dark that he didn't think any light could penetrate it. The Jaffa opened three different cells and Daniel felt himself panicking. They were being separated.
He watched as Jack and Teal'c struggled, but neither was successful. They were all thrown into the cells and the bars were closed with a deafening clang that ripped through the silent shadow.
Apophis's First Prime stepped up to his cell and locked the door with the large bunch of keys that hung from his belt next to his Zat gun. He grinned nastily, "Our Lady, Kephni, ordered that you were to be locked in the lowest dungeon and tortured."
Daniel could hear Jack say, "It doesn't matter. That's not even Sam, so why should we care?"
The First Prime laughed, "Soon she will no longer exist. Nothing of the host survives. I must say it is a pity that she was taken by our lord as a host for his Queen. She is most desirable and, as First Prime, it would be my duty to `care' for your wife, O'Neill. Maybe, I could've arranged it so you could've watched!"
Jack didn't speak, but Daniel could almost feel the air heating up. The First Prime laughed again and, with the usual command, him and his Jaffa left.
Daniel felt himself blessing his stars they'd left a torch. He sat by the bars, as close to the torch as he could get and pulled his arms around him. It was cold down here, not to mention extremely creepy.
Daniel heard Jack's voice again and realised Jack was in the cell to his left and Teal'c in the one to his right. He spoke his voice echoing, "Daniel, try and get some sleep. I know it's hard, but if that guy's right and we are going to be tortured..."
"Yeah," Daniel murmured back. He then said extremely quietly, "Night Jack."
"Night Daniel."
~~~~~~
Kephni sat in her chamber waiting for one of the Jaffa to ask for her to be taken to her Lord's room again or maybe to a room to be on her own. The thought sickened and frightened her. She knew now that she was not in love with Apophis and that in fact she loathed him.
He had tried to give her a child, but it hadn't worked and now he was furious with her. She'd seen one of his advisers, the shorter adviser, trying to tell Apophis that it might be better to lock her up in a room for a few days as she had taken something to prevent her becoming with child and it would wear off in that time. Apophis had been angry with the man although he had agreed.
The adviser had seemed familiar and this morning he'd come and given her something to eat. He'd treated her with the proper respect and courtesy, but there had been something about the older man that was awfully familiar.
That wasn't all that was in her reeling mind. She wondered why her voice had changed when she'd spoken the day before. It had become harsh and hadn't sounded normal. It had sounded cruel and something told her that it was bad. That voice was still there, in the back of her mind, taunting her and threatening her. Kephni realised she'd first heard that voice when she'd woken up not knowing who she was that morning.
She tried to shake the fears from her mind, as the larger her fear or anger got, the louder the voice would get.
Kephni stood up from her chair and stared at her reflection in a mirror. She wondered if she really was beautiful, as Apophis had said. She was wearing strange clothes. Unlike most of the people in this place they were not gold and red and other fiery colours. Instead she wore white and silver.
The clothes were revealing to say the least. Her back was bare as were her long legs. Her cleavage seemed to be on show and she guessed that was the idea. Her long flowing white dress touched the floor and fastened around her neck. On her wrists were silver bracelets and around her neck was a dainty silver pendant with a large, but familiar symbol dangling at the end. She had seen it many times in this fortress and guessed it was the sign of Apophis. Encircling her head was a delicate, silver chain and a thick, but equally as delicate, silver belt was fastened around her hips.
She stepped away from the mirror and looked around the extravagant dcor of the room. There was so much finery and objects of value and for some reason `the voice' was extremely attracted to the things. Kephni couldn't really care less for fancy belongings. For some reason, they were not important to her.
And suddenly, her thoughts turned to the men in the prison and especially to that one man who'd stood by the bars as she'd turned back. There was something different about him. The other two she knew were precious to her, but the third... She couldn't describe the feeling she'd had when she'd seen him. Her heart had been twisted with concern and grief. She cared for him a great deal and the idea of them being tortured as she stood there made her nauseous...
It was then the adviser entered followed by two Jaffa who stood outside the door. She turned to him as he spoke, "My Queen."
She gave him a small smile and murmured, "Have you come to take me to my Lord?"
The man shook his head and said in the same voice Apophis spoke in, "No. You are to be sent to a cell and are to stay there for three days."
She nodded worried and murmured slightly fearfully, "Not the dungeon?"
The man smiled kindly, "No, my Queen. It is like your room, less magnificent and smaller though, but it is comfortable."
Unlike Apophis's voice he didn't speak brutally and Kephni wondered who the man was. When he spoke to Apophis his voice had that cruelness, but now as he spoke to her he sounded... different.
"You are to come with me immediately."
She walked towards the man and followed him from the room down the corridors. He barked an order nastily to the Jaffa who began to escort them. They did not speak, although she could feel the man observing her. She pretended to be oblivious to his observation as they finally reached a secluded wing of the fortress. It was a long corridor with many rooms branching off. The Jaffa stayed at the entrance to the passage as the man led her down the long corridor and turned a corridor. There were yet more rooms down here. He led her to one as he said, "The Jaffa are not allowed down here. It is forbidden."
Kephni knew better than to ask why. He opened the door from the panel on the outside of the cell. It slid open and then slid shut behind them as they stepped into the room. It was small, but there was a comfy bed and a chair. A window looked out over the beautiful planet, although Kephni knew she could not escape through it. There was a sheer drop below, not to mention the window had a force shield protecting it.
The man spoke in an undertone, "I must tell you that I cannot free you from this place."
She looked at the man in shock. His dark eyes stared at her as he murmured, "I would if I could, but there is no way. Just as if you escape with your friends that are imprisoned in the dungeon, there is no way you can help me escape also."
She looked at him, "I... I... Who are you?"
She saw care and sadness in the man's eyes as he murmured, "A friend." He cleared his throat, "I am telling you this now. I am the one who slipped the drug into your system that prevented Apophis from giving you a child. I also lied to him. The drug has worn off now. I would give you more, but you are now immune..."
"Why are you telling me this?" She spoke desperately, "In three days he will try again." She felt tears in her eyes as she sat on the bed, "I'm terrified. I don't want to give him a child. I know what powers it would have." She looked at the adviser, "He will give me Harcesis and the child will tell him everything he wishes to know. There is no way I can prevent it."
The man looked awkward as he spoke next, "There is... a way."
She looked at him hurriedly wiping away her fearful tears, "How?"
The man walked to the door, a strange reluctance in his voice, as he answered her desperate question, "If you are already with child."
With that he turned to leave the room and just as he closed the door he added, "If you require anything or anyone ring the bell and I shall be sent to carry out your request." He looked at her sadly for a moment before murmuring, "I'm sorry, but it's the only way."
~~~~~~
Jack sat in an aching silence as the Jaffa retreated back up the stairway. He croaked, "Well at least Apophis still knows how to throw a good torture party."
A hesitant, faint voice from his also well-tortured neighbour echoed in the bone-chilling darkness, "Are you badly hurt?"
"No, I'm OK. A bit sore, but... OK..."
Teal'c spoke, the best sounding out of all of them considering his torture had lasted the longest and was probably the most gruelling, "I believe it is not the torture that has damaged you, O'Neill."
The Jaffa had spoken with a slight raise in pitch at the end as if it were a question. Even when Teal'c couldn't see him he could still read him like a book!
Jack sighed, "5 years, T. She's been `alive' for 5 years and I never knew. I never realised. I thought she was buried in a cemetery. I never tried to find her..."
"Jack, we had no way of knowing. For all we knew she died in her sleep that night. There was no way to know that she'd actually been abducted and replaced with a perfect, but lifeless clone, that Apophis had separated her mind from her body and had taken over Thor's body temporarily, bringing your baby daughter back to life and transferring your wife's consciousness into her body, then whisking Sam's body away and implanting her with a Goa'ul..."
"Daniel, stop it!"
The anger, hurt and pain in Jack's voice were well noted by the Doctor and he realised how he'd been almost rubbing Sam's death in.
"Jack, I'm sorry... I didn't..."
"Don't worried, Danny. I'm OK. Just need to get some sleep..." Jack had blatantly lied through his teeth, but the fact he had didn't bother Daniel as at that moment the sounds of a Jaffa returning down the stairs made them all freeze.
Daniel spoke in a fearful whisper, "Surely not again. Not so soon."
The Jaffa stopped before their cells as a silent companion they had not realised the Serpent guard had had, stepped into the light.
It took all their ability not to gasp...
The man spoke in a cruel Goa'uld's voice, "Colonel O'Neill, you are to come with me."
His cell door was opened and the Jaffa came in to roughly get him up, but Jack shook him off and stood on his own, although his aching limbs protested. He was marched out of the cell giving Teal'c and Daniel a final utterly confused look before being led up the stairs and up into the main dungeon area where sounds of their talking could not be overheard due to the miserable screams of the damned souls locked away in here.
The man turned to him and spoke in his normal voice, "Hello Jack..."
Jack nodded to the Jaffa curiously as the man sensed his wariness. He laughed, "He's on our side. One of Teal'c's loyal followers. He's been undercover for a while. He was the one who provided information about Sam 3 years ago. I was sent to check it out. I came not realising until I arrived that it was her who had become Apophis's newest acquisition."
Jack shuddered at the thought before the man gave him a small smile, "I'm so sorry you have to go through this, Kid." He cleared his throat, "Let me reassure you, he only managed to revive her several days ago and there were problems with her remembering things. Four days ago, he succeeded in properly blanking her memory or so we believe. He tried to..." Jacob's voice trailed off as he gulped slightly and continued, "I put a contraceptive drug in her system so... he confined her till it wore off. I told him three days when really it was less than one. She's locked in a cell. She's confused and miserable, but hopefully when you get her home she'll improve..."
Jack looked up at the man as he murmured, "At least at the end of all this, I'll still have a chance to have her alive and well again. You hear about Megan?"
Jacob nodded slowly, "Apophis's plan details were leaked to me when I first started undercover here. I'm so sorry I couldn't contact home and tell you all, but..."
Jacob sighed slightly his voice trailing away at the thought of his granddaughter. He gripped Jack's elbow and began propelling him along again towards the main palace. Jack spoke surprised, "Uh Jacob. My cell is that way!"
"I know."
Jack spoke to him again, "That's the part I don't get. You see, we're going this way!"
Jacob chuckled, beyond ecstatic that Jack had made a crack at humour. He'd guessed since the last time he'd seen Jack almost 3 years ago, the man's hollowness had not changed. He'd been empty and broken every since Sam `died' and it broke Jacob's heart to know that. Well, not really know it, rather than sense it.
Jacob spoke quietly as they crept into the hallway, "I need to ask a favour, Jack."
"What?" Jack asked in a tone that said he'd do anything for his father-in-law.
Jacob spoke seriously, "You have to understand... I don't want to make you do this... I hate even having to consider making you do this, but you must understand that if we don't... Sam is going to be carrying a Harcesis before we know it."
"What, Jake?" Jack seemed to be even more desperate to know what it was he could do to help.
Jacob sighed ever so quietly as they turned a corridor into a small narrow one. The Jaffa stopped outside as they walked down it and around a corner and to a door.
He looked his son-in-law in the eye and murmured, "Sam wanted to see you."
"Sam or the Snake?"
Jake shivered slightly as for the umpteenth time the idea of his daughter's body being used against her will floated across his mind before he murmured, "Sam."
"Why?"
"I suggested it to her. It's the only way I can think of that can stop this whole Harcesis plan. She only had three days and this is the final day. I'm so glad it occurred to her..."
Jack interrupted, "Why now?"
Jacob shuddered, "Because tomorrow Apophis is going to try and impregnate Sam again and this time there won't be a contraceptive drug in her system..."
"So what do I do?"
Jacob smiled sadly, "You'll know soon enough."
~~~~~~
Jack stepped into the room and looked around the usual Goa'uld dcor before his eyes were drawn to the one thing in the room that was not in scarlet or gold.
A woman dressed in white, with hair like gold and eyes the colour of a cloudless sky, sat in a chair near the window, staring out into the starry heavens above and crying. Her back was shaking with sobs and her breaths were ragged occasional broken with an almost silent whine.
The door shut behind Jack with a small clunk and his wife looked up in shock. Jack froze as did Samantha O'Neill, the both of them just staring at one another as slowly she wiped the tears from her cheeks.
She stared at him with her blue eyes and Jack felt his heart stop with a mixture of pain, joy and overwhelming sense of time standing still. Seeing her again, no longer being led around by Apophis had an effect on Jack. It finally dawned on him. She was alive...
"I know you..." She whispered with a slight confusion for a second. Jack didn't say anything unable to move or speak. She stepped closer hesitantly until she was a foot away from him. She spoke again in a whisper, "I know you..." She frowned slightly trying to figure out who he was.
After a second he spoke, his voice weak and shaky, "Why did you call me here?"
She stood before him looking unsure as she glanced down at her new attire. She was no longer wearing the dress and was now in the garments Apophis preferred her to wear when he was with her. They were also white and silver, but consisted of nothing more than underwear and a flimsy piece of white material fastened around her hips that was obviously supposed to be some kind of skirt. She was barely covered. When she was with Apophis she usually felt awkward, embarrassed and disgusted by the clothing, but now...
She glanced up at the man, but was unable to look at his face, knowing what she had to ask of him. His uniform was dirty and had been ripped in a few places showing that her orders for them to be tortured well were obviously being carried out. Her eyes rose slowly and before she could stop herself, her eyes were connecting with his.
A wave of emotion filled her as she stared at him and saw the longing, desire and... Love in his eyes. Love. Kephni was sure that that much love couldn't just be generated over night. She realised she did know him. Somehow she knew him and somehow she loved him.
She spoke her voice frightened and quiet, "I must stop Apophis from giving me Harcesis. The Advisor could only think of one way I can stop that..." She looked into the man's eyes and saw his desperation to help her and she knew she meant something to him. She meant an awful lot to him. She was important to him. She spoke faintly, her lip trembling, "I must already be... be with child..."
The statement dawned on Jack and he felt his eyes widening. I mean he could understand why Jacob had been worried he wouldn't help her. Truth was Jack was so overwhelmed with the situation he wasn't sure of anything. He stared at her and a tear fell from her eyes as she turned away from him, "I understand. Please leave."
"No."
She looked at him shocked and murmured, "What?"
"Sam, I... You're my wife."
She gawped at him in shock as she whispered, "I... I don't remember... But I realised I couldn't... love someone as deeply as I loved you if I'd only seen them for a split second... I knew we must've known each other before I can remember..."
Another tear dripped down her face as she whispered, "I'm so frightened. I just want to go home. Get as far away from this place as I can. I don't remember home or my family, but I know Apophis is not and never will be any part of it."
Jack immediately pulled her into his arms and kissed her head as she began to cry into his shoulder. As he touched her skin with his fingertips, it made them tingle and trembles spread down his spine. He could hear her whimpers, he could see her golden hair, could touch her silky, soft skin, he could smell that faint scent of vanilla that was Sam... his Sam.
After a second Kephni pulled back, her beautiful eyes fixed on his face, trailing over ever feature slowly. Her hand reached up gently and she touched his slightly stubbly cheek. He leant forward slowly and placed a tentative kiss on her lips. His eyes slid shut as he remembered the last time he'd kissed her, when she'd been on her death bed. She'd been crying then, terrified of dying...
He opened them slowly to find her looking at him sadly. As he stared at his wife, he realised how much he loved her. He seemed to realise it every time he stared into those eyes. She was so real; it was hard to believe... She was real...
Kephni took a step closer, her hands on his shoulders as she slowly removed the familiar green jacket with two familiar emblems on either shoulder. She looked back into his eyes as the jacket dropped to the marble floor with a small rustle. He moved even closer his body now pressed against hers as his lips found hers again, kissing her slowly, lovingly, but also with an odd sense of desperation.
Kephni felt tears still rolling down her cheeks. Not tears of disgust or fear that had fallen from her eyes during her night with Apophis. In fact she couldn't explain the tears that fell from her eyes. She couldn't explain the smile that came to her lips. She couldn't explain the way her heart seemed to swell and ache with an emotion she couldn't believe.
His hands trailed over her skin softly as she whispered to him...
He pulled back and stared at her in shock, his chest rising and falling slightly faster than was normal as he mumbled, "`Jack'... You... you just said `Jack'. You remember my name..."
She hadn't realised she'd said anything, but now she looked at him... Memories. Scattered. Just images. Apophis torturing a teenage boy, the golden beam of a ribbon device aimed between his two dark brown eyes. A cabin covered in snow by a lake. Sat at a table across from him and arguing. An ultrasound photo of an unborn baby. A church. She was dressed in a long white dress as she kissed Jack. A small baby boy in her arms. A children's song she couldn't remember. Making love to this man. A hospital. People she couldn't remember crying and saying goodbye to her. Jack comforting her...
The images made no sense to her, but she understood. She had been together with this man. In love. Married... She stared at his careworn face as she saw tears accumulating in the corners of his beautiful chestnut eyes as he just stared back at her.
She began to kiss him again urgently as she whispered with a tearful gasp, "I know you!"
~~~~~~
After Jack had left her room, Kephni sat in the silence. Her skin was still burning to his previous touch, her lips tingling and her whole heart aching for him. She now had no trouble doubting he loved her and that for some unknown reason it felt like forever since he had last held her or kissed her...
She'd felt so safe as his fingers had gently caressed her skin. With so much pent up love, desire and pain that Kephni had been in tears from beginning to end. Apophis never touched her like that and her mind was now clear enough to know in no way shape or form did he love her...
"My Queen?"
Kephni's eyes rose as she realised the Adviser was stood in the doorway and probably had been for a few minutes. She'd been so busy thinking she hadn't realised he was there.
He spoke gently, in a caring tone, "My Queen, Lord Apophis wishes you to join him in his chamber tomorrow evening. Until then I suggest you rest..."
Kephni nodded, the deadline having been set for her to be sent back to the lustful nights of pain and misery at the hands of `her Lord'.
The Adviser spoke in an undertone, "My Queen, did...?"
A quivering drop of liquid fell from her eyes as she looked up at the kindly Adviser, a wave of familiarity coming over her again as she whispered, "Yes. And I know I can no longer harbour a Harcesis Child for Apophis."
The man controlled a shudder, although not well enough for her to have not noticed. After a second, he replaced his courteous smile and bowed, "Sleep well, My Queen. I shall bring you your breakfast in the morning."
Kephni nodded as the door slid shut behind the man again. She sighed softly and crawled back beneath the covers of the bed, the smell of the man she loved fused into the sheets and pillow. She breathed in the scent as another tear fell and splashed onto the linen, soaking in rapidly and leaving a small wet patch.
Her fingers stroked the soft white material beneath her head and then hugged another of the pillows to her, letting her mind float away and allowing her memory to try and fight to be heard as she drifted off into a peaceful sleep.
~~~~~~
She stood still as his lips trailed the skin on her neck. Tears formed in her eyes although she refused to cry, to show her weakness and allow him to realise his brainwashing had not worked. His smooth hands ran over her body, pulling down the straps of her bra. He moved around to face her, his eyes glowing and making her shudder.
He grabbed her face and began to kiss her. Suddenly, he was a couple of feet away from her holding a hand to his cheek where she'd struck him.
Apophis's eyes glowed again in anger, "Kephni, what is the meaning of this?!?"
Now he realised her treachery, although not completely. She took a stumbling step back adjusting her clothing as she growled in a hush tone, "Never lay your slimy hands on me again!"
Apophis was furious, a vein on his neck sticking out slightly as he grabbed a ribbon device. She tried to move out of the way, but the blast from the jewel at the centre of his palm caught her and sent her sprawling into the wall.
She was disorientated, her head spinning, as his hands grabbed her, his fingertips digging into her arms mercilessly as he dragged her to his bed. He threw her down as she struggled against him, suddenly feeling like she could be violently sick. Tears still streamed from her eyes as he used the ribbon device again.
She couldn't move and could barely breathe with the weight of his body crushing her into the bed. His hands caressed her body roughly and Kephni wished he was dead and that it was last night, Jack holding her and kissing her lovingly...
His hands moved to undo her garments when two things happened. One, she shoved him as hard as she could away from her and two, a blast of blue electricity engulfed his body as he clung onto the bed frame before it was swiftly followed by a second and his grip slackened, his bodyweight falling heavily over her again.
Kephni looked up to see the Adviser stood with the Zat gun aimed at Apophis's now limp form that pinned her down. She stared at the man in shock, disbelieving what he'd just done. She'd known he'd always been sympathetic towards her, but... he'd just killed his God. She spoke slightly breathless, "You... You killed him."
The man nodded as he hurriedly, and with a distinct look of hatred on his face, flung Apophis's body off her. He spoke urgently, "You have to get out of here, Sam."
She replaced her white dress over her under garments and the both of them ran to the door. She spoke, "You have to come with me. We will set my friends free and we can leave..."
"No," he murmured and gave her a small smile, "I will be endangering you. I have been tagged and they can find me wherever I go."
She stared at him for a moment and murmured, "Who are you? Really."
He smiled caringly, "Someone who loves you." She gave a small gasp. His voice had changed to normal like hers! She stared at him confused as he murmured, "You have to go. Daniel and Teal'c are still in the lower dungeon, but Jack is now in the upper dungeon."
She nodded and as she left the door she murmured, "What will happen to you?"
"I don't know, Sam. I'll find a way back to the Tok'ra," he looked at her desperately, "Now Go."
The voice in her head was yelling at her in anger as she ran to the door and opened it slowly. She glanced outside and ran along the corridor. She glanced down the corridor and mentally blocked out the screaming in her head.
Kephni avoided the Jaffa as best she could as she made her way toward the prison. She reached the torch-lit dungeon and saw that Apophis's First Prime was standing on guard by the entrance. She knew that there were no other Jaffa in the prison and the adviser had told her that Jack had been placed in the higher dungeon, while the other two were still down in the darkness of the lower dungeon.
When he saw her he looked confused, but also she noticed something in his eyes that she also saw in Apophis's. The same look that made her teeth grit and her skin prickle with disgust. He spoke, his eyes roving over her bare skin, "My Queen?"
Kephni spoke seductively, "My Lord ordered me to come to you," she stepped closer and stroked a hand down his face, "You are to be rewarded for your services."
He looked amazed, but she kissed him hard. She felt like she wanted to throw up, but instead she moved her hand to his Zat gun. She shoved him out of the way and shot him twice with the gun. He collapsed to the floor with a small thud. She wiped the foul taste from her lips and grabbed the bunch of keys that hung from his belt.
~~~~~~
Jack was thinking. Jacob. Jacob had sent him to Sam's room. Jacob had sent him to Sam's room and he'd known that Sam wanted to become pregnant.
He shuddered slightly as he remember Sam's look of absolute fear at the prospect of Apophis returning to her. She had been terrified, horrified by it. She knew what Apophis was trying to do and she knew that, at least in her subconscious, the Harcesis child would be used by Apophis so he could destroy Earth and rule the universe.
Jack was about to attempt sleep, although he knew it wouldn't come anyway, when he heard a muffled thud. His ears pricked up almost like a dog at the almost inaudible sound and he opened his eyes. He heard small footsteps, not those of a Jaffa clad in heavy armour, descending the freezing, stone steps behind him. He crawled to the opposite wall of the cell so he could just see the bottom stairs to his left.
Like an angel the woman almost floated down the steps. Her white dress fluttered out behind her as her dainty white slippers touched the icy, stone floor. When he saw her face he almost felt his heart stop. She stood by the flaming torch as it flickered turning her flawless white robes to a pale yellow. He could see the fear in her eyes as she looked around the horrible jail. Her eyes scanned the darkness and she took a few steps forward.
Her eyes then fell on him. She dived to her knees in front of him. She stared at him for a moment before she stretched a hand through the bars and stroked his cheek as she whispered anxiously, "Are you alright?"
Jack just nodded, unable to speak, his heart stopping for a moment.
"They haven't tortured you, have they? Jack? Are you alright? Say something."
He nodded his head slowly, "They have tortured me, but I'm... I'm OK." He could see horrified tears shimmering in her beautiful eyes as her fingers trailed his face. After a moment she removed her hand and placed them both in her lap as she spoke softly, "Before I... break you out of here, I need to know who you are, Jack. Who you really are. All I know is your name and that I love you with all my heart."
He spoke in a hushed voice, "We came through the Stargate on a mission to rescue you from this fortress." Jack just spoke heartbrokenly, "You... died five years ago, but at some point Apophis must've taken you and transferred your consciousness into... our daughter."
Sam looked flabbergasted and absolutely bewildered, Jack having little time to explain everything, "We don't know what he did, but we got intelligence that you were here. We came here and were captured. Apophis called me and said he wanted to show me his new queen. He paraded you in and I knew you weren't a Goa'uld, but you didn't know who you were."
"I don't remember that," she murmured shocked.
Jack nodded and then continued, "The next time we saw you, was when you came down into the prison four days ago and I noticed... that..."
He pointed to her neck and he watched as she frowned at him confused and then felt along her neck to the laceration. She frowned, "What is it? I figured I'd just hurt myself..."
Jack didn't really want to be telling her this, but he had to. He spoke gently, "It's where Apophis implanted a Goa'uld..."
She spoke with realisation, "Those... serpents?" She gasped horrified, "I remember... I saw some in a tank in... a temple. I don't remember anything from before waking up in that temple that day I first came down into the prison."
Jack nodded in understanding before murmuring, "Yes. The serpents are Goa'ulds." She looked like she was going to be sick. Jack put a hand through the bars and tried to comfort her as he murmured, "It hasn't taken over your body?"
"No," she whispered, "But since I woke, I've had a voice in the back of my head and there was one moment when the voice took over. I spoke, but my words were not my own..."
Jack just nodded sadly and then whispered, "You have to get us out of here so we can get you home."
She looked at him and stood up quickly, fumbling with the keys. She found the right one and unlocked his door. He stepped out and nodded slightly. She flung her arms around him as she kissed him gently and murmured, "I was so afraid they would hurt you badly because of what it said."
She was obviously referring to the Goa'uld. Jack nodded gently as she removed her arms from him and then grabbing the torch she led him down back into the endless dark with her other two friends were still imprisoned.
She moved to Daniel's door. The man was roused by the sound of the metal key in the rusty lock. He woke and stood up. He almost ran out of the cell to Jack and then looked at Sam. He spoke to Jack quietly, "Jack! Are you alright? When you didn't return..."
"I'm fine. Jacob left me in a cell up there. Are you OK?"
Daniel nodded as he then turned to Sam as she walked towards Teal'c's cell. The minute she went to put the key in the lock, she dropped the bunch. Daniel hurriedly grabbed the keys and unlocked Teal'c's door as Sam stumbled backwards clasping her head.
Almost as if he'd foreseen it, he knew what would happen next. Jack grabbed her and held a hand over her mouth, muffling the scream of pain that she let out.
Teal'c spoke in a hurried whisper, "A Goa'uld can inflict much pain in the host if it chooses..."
"Damn," Jack said quickly. He looked at the woman who was shaking in his arms. He pulled his hand from her mouth and murmured, "We'll get weapons and get out of here quick." He turned to Sam and spoke gently, "Are you OK to walk?" She nodded uncertainly. Jack turned to the others, "I'll look after Sam. You guys will have to do most of the shooting."
Daniel and Teal'c both nodded. Sam looked at him frightened, "Where are we going?"
"To the Stargate. We're going back home."
"Can they get this thing out of me?"
Jack looked at her and lied, "I'm not sure."
"The adviser told me his people could."
Jack looked at Daniel, "The Tok'ra can?"
"I'm not sure, Jack. I guess they cou..."
Teal'c spoke again, "O'Neill, we must leave immediately."
Daniel spoke, "W-wait a minute, Guys. What about Jacob?"
Jack spoke regretfully, "He's been tagged. If we take him with us... He ordered me to leave him. He said he had to stay for other reasons as well, but I don't know why. The Tok'ra will be picking him up in 24 hrs anyway."
Daniel nodded reluctantly as he and Teal'c led out of the room. Jack followed behind with Sam. He kept one arm around her bare shoulders, just in case she screamed again or collapsed from the pain. They reached the top of the stairs and Daniel took the First Prime's Zat and shot open the box with all their stuff in. Teal'c took his staff weapon and passed Jack his sidearm and a MP-5. He also grabbed a GDO and strapped it to his arm.
Jack held the MP-5 in one hand as he stared at his wife. She looked scared to death and she kept muttering and murmuring in Goa'uld. He turned to Teal'c, "What's she saying?"
Teal'c spoke gravely, "I believe she is conversing with the Goa'uld. She seems to be saying phrases to the affect of `Leave me' or `Let me go'." Teal'c frowned as Sam said something different. Daniel's eyes shot wide open as Jack looked at Teal'c, asking him to translate. Teal'c spoke, "She told the Goa'uld to leave her child alone."
Jack just nodded and grabbed Sam by the shoulders. He felt himself blushing and Daniel and Teal'c looking at him confused. Her eyes shot up in line with his as he murmured, "Stay with us, Baby. Don't let that snake win!"
She looked at him confused, "My name is Kephni."
"Ah crap," Jack murmured, "I'm Jack, remember, and your real name is Sam. We were captured. We're going home now, but we have to escape from this fortress."
She nodded slowly showing she remembered, "The Goa'uld wants to kill my child. She cannot. The child is too young. So she will kill me and immediately seek out another host."
Daniel and Teal'c looked at Sam in shock. Daniel turned to Jack and asked, "A Harcesis?"
Jack spoke quietly, "It's not a Harcesis."
Daniel looked completely confused as Sam murmured, "She will not hibernate and once the baby is a month old she can cause miscarriage." Tears rolled down the frightened woman's cheeks, "She will kill me before then."
Jack shook his head and fixed her with a determined stare, "She won't win, Sam. You have to fight it." She was trembling violently and Jack immediately clamped a hand over her mouth as she let another scream escape her lips. Jack held Sam close to him as he said to Teal'c, "Which is the quickest way out of here?"
Daniel spoke up, "There's an entrance about four corridors from here."
"It will be heavily guarded, O'Neill."
Jack glanced at his guns, "That's what these are for," he cleared his throat, "We'll try and get through the corridors without any fuss and then we'll take out the Jaffa at the front door. Another problem is the Gate."
"O'Neill is correct. I counted many scores of Jaffa around the Gate."
Jack spoke, "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it..."
Sam tried to speak and so Jack removed his hand. She was slightly breathless from the pain and was gasping for breaths, "There's another way out of here..."
"What?"
She took another deep breath and murmured, "There's a ship hanger... second room on... on the right..."
Jack nodded and then whispered, "How many Jaffa?"
"I counted six," she took a deep breath, "If we take a small... trading vessel we can fly... to another planet..."
"And use their Stargate," Daniel supplied. He looked at Jack, "It'll mean we leave with less of a fire fight."
Jack glanced at his wife and nodded, "OK. Teal'c, lead the way."
They left the prison and reached the top corridor. They could hear serpent guards marching their way. Jack clamped a hand over Sam's mouth as he dragged her back into the shadows of the prison. She let out a much quieter scream this time that was hushed by his hand and almost drowned out by the whimpers and cries of the other prisoners. The guards passed and he removed his hand from her mouth as she put a hand to her head and began muttering again.
Jack nodded to Teal'c and Daniel who ran back up the stairs and checked the coast was clear. Jack helped Sam up the steps and then ran with the others to the hanger.
Teal'c opened the door and Daniel ran in and began shooting. Teal'c joined him as Jack and Sam ran in afterwards and after Jack sheltered Sam behind a huge crate he got up and began to shoot.
Teal'c and Daniel joined him behind the crate as Teal'c said between exchanged shots, "O'Neill... We must... close the door..." He shot again and his target fell to the floor, dead.
They continued to shoot and Jack looked down at his side, "Sam?" He saw his wife staggering towards the door. Three of the five Jaffa left aimed their staffs at her.
She spoke to the Jaffa, "Shoot them all! Protect your Queen!"
The Jaffa immediately began shooting back at the crates. Jack watched as Sam spun around pressed seven buttons on the door controls as the door closed and locked. She then fell against the wall as she collapsed to the ground with yet another scream of agony that seemed to pierce his very soul and made him shudder.
Jack ran to her and in the process shot down one of the Jaffa. Daniel managed to Zat two at the same time. Teal'c's staff claimed another's life as the other grabbed Jack from behind, a knife at his throat.
Jack struggled until the Jaffa aimed a Zat gun at the writhing woman on the floor, "Even if I am disobeying my orders, I will kill her. We can revive her, but you cannot. Move and I will shoot her where she lies."
Jack stopped immediately and the Jaffa span around so he faced Daniel and Teal'c, "Make one move and I will slit his throat." They both stood there as the Jaffa said triumphantly, "Drop your weapons."
There was banging on the door behind him and Jack knew the Jaffa would get in soon.
Daniel and Teal'c both dropped their weapons as the Jaffa laughed, "Say goodbye to your comrade..."
Another hand shot out and grabbed the guy's knife hand. Jack watched as the hand deftly snapped the Jaffa's wrist, grabbed his Zat and shot him twice. Jack turned swiftly to see Sam stood before him as she stuttered, "I d-don't think so, B-uddy."
She fell forward and Jack caught her in his arms. Jack could tell she was unconscious immediately and began to mentally curse Apophis with enough hatred to make him an official member of the Dark Side!
Jack turned back to his other friends. He saw Teal'c already running to a small cargo ship. He pressed some buttons on the side as a trapdoor lowered from the belly of the vessel. Jack hoisted the unconscious woman into his arms as he ran for the ship. He heard the door behind him open again and could see Daniel shooting at the Serpent Guards, who'd entered behind him, from the ship's trapdoor. He ran up the ramp and into the ship as Daniel closed the trapdoor. Teal'c was already flying the ship forward fast. Daniel took Sam as Jack ran to the controls.
Teal'c spoke, "They are closing the doors..."
Jack looked forward and could see the massive metal doors sliding together.
"Come on..." Jack muttered, "Come on..."
"Hold fast to your chair restraint," Teal'c said in his peculiar way as he span the ship onto its side and made it through the gap.
Jack stood up from his awkward position against the far wall and put a hand to his nose. His fingers were coated in blood. Jack immediately stared up to the ceiling and grabbed a tissue from his pocket. He ripped off two large pieces and stuffed them into his nostrils.
Teal'c asked as they shot through the air, "Is your nose damaged, O'Neill?"
"Nah," Jack said stuffily, "I fink ids jusd a nose bleed, Deal'c."
"Then I must ask you to use the ship's weapons and shoot the gliders that pursue us."
"Righd," Jack said as he sat in the chair next to Teal'c and worked out which button was fire and how to aim.
There were five gliders on their tail, not to mention the shots that were fired from gunners on the ground. Jack watched as the gliders moved around on the screen in front of his. He waited for one to move into range. One of the gliders moved into the centre and Jack shot. The glider exploded taking another with it.
"Sweed!" Jack exclaimed at Teal'c raised an eyebrow, but continued with his flying towards the atmosphere.
Jack managed to shoot another in the wing. It spiralled down, out of view, towards the planet surface below, billowing thick black smoke following it in its rapid descent.
The other two gliders were much harder to shoot. They kept darting all over the screen never straying into the target cursor.
"O'Neill!"
Jack looked up to see another two gliders speeding towards them. Jack turned to Teal'c, "Go ub!" Teal'c nodded, as Jack said, "Ready... sdeady... GO!"
Teal'c shot up and Jack watched as the four gliders collided below them. They shot through the atmosphere and into space.
Teal'c spoke, "I am about to jump to hyperspace."
Jack grabbed onto his chair fiercely, "OK. Fanks for de warning."
~~~~~~
Daniel sat with Sam in the only sleeping quarters on the small ship. There were two single beds and Sam now lay on one. She had been shivering, but Daniel had managed to find some blankets which now covered her skimpy clothing.
He felt the jolt to hyperspace and had to stop Sam from falling off the bed. He covered her with the blankets again and sat next to her. After a few minutes she stirred and her eyes opened blearily. She spoke as she looked at Daniel, "Where's Jack?"
"He's on the Pel'tac with Teal'c."
Sam nodded slightly and then her eyes widened with fear and she let out a cry. Not a fierce as her screams before, but still extremely painful by the sounds of things. She clung to the blankets as she cried, "Jack!"
Tears were pouring from her eyes as Jack came tearing into the room. When he saw Sam, he threw himself down by her side as Daniel moved out the way slightly. His face was creased with concern. Daniel noticed his nose was bleeding and that he had 2 pieces of tissue attempting to stop the flow.
He spoke softly as he held her hand tightly and stroked her hair with his other hand, "Shh. Id's OK. I'm here. I'm here, Honey."
She whimpered through her sobs, "The baby! She's trying to kill the baby! Don't let her! Please! She's trying to kill my baby!"
The look of horror on Jack's face was confusing as Daniel wondered why. Jack stared at her as she let out another cry. She began to mutter in Goa'uld. Jack turned to Daniel whispering desperately, "Do you know off eny way we could ged rid off de Goa'uld? De Dok'ra are gonna dake ages to decide iff she could use whadever dey've god!"
Daniel shook his head as Teal'c yelled from the Pel'tac, "We are coming out of Hyperspace."
Daniel grabbed the wall as Jack supported Sam as best as he could. She ended up in his arms on the floor. She gave a soft moan and whispered to Jack, "I'm scared. I don't want to die. I don't want her to kill the baby."
He just nodded and whispered comfortingly, "Everyfing is gonna be alrighd, Baby. You'll see."
Daniel spoke gently, knowing as Sam burst into yet more frightened tears and clung to Jack as they sat on the floor, that it was time for him to excuse himself, "I'll go see Teal'c."
Daniel left the room and strolled swiftly to the Pel'tac. Teal'c spoke, "I am analysing this planet to determine if we can land there and if a Stargate may be present."
Daniel watched as Goa'uld writing appeared on the screen. Daniel nodded, "Air is thin, but breathable. It can sustain life."
Teal'c nodded as a diagram of the planet appeared on the screen showing a flashing red dot. Teal'c pointed at it as he murmured, "That is the position of the Stargate."
Daniel nodded, "I'll go tell Jack and Sam we're landing now."
Teal'c nodded as he went back to the ship's controls and began to fly towards the planet. Daniel wandered back to the room. The two individuals didn't seem to have moved much. Sam's chin now lay on Jack's shoulder as he murmured, "We'll get home and we'll find a way to get that thing out of you."
Daniel frowned slightly in confusion. As the man glanced up at him and he noticed the blood soaked tissues were now missing. So that was why he was no longer talking like someone with a severe cold.
Sam's shuddery voice was almost heart-breaking as she murmured, "You can't get it out." She looked at Jack and whispered, "I don't want the baby to die." She continued to cry as Jack pulled her into another hug and absentmindedly rocked her slightly as she curled up in his arms.
Daniel cleared his throat as Jack looked up at him. He spoke gently, "Teal'c's trying to land on this planet. It can support human life and from there we should be able to gate home."
Jack nodded and murmured to Daniel, "Have we got anything we could dress Sam in?" He glanced at her and murmured, "She's... uh... gotta be cold, not to mention I don't approve of my wife running around half-naked!"
Daniel smiled slightly at the joke, already seeing a change in his best friend. He sighed and shook his head, "We could give her one of our jackets, but the planet's warm. Summer in Florida warm."
Jack smiled as Sam's tearstained face looked up and she said, "Florida?"
Jack explained, "It's a place back home. Great. Disney land."
She frowned in confusion, "Disney land?"
Jack smiled, "You'll remember soon... oh! I almost forgot." He pulled off his jacket and pulled it over her shoulders, "Better?"
She nodded as she stared into his eyes and murmured fearfully, "What if I don't remember?"
Jack looked worried by her tone of voice, but put on an optimistic face, "Don't be silly! Of course you'll remember. And you and the baby are going to be fine. We're going to go home and get rid of the Snake and you can spend the rest of your pregnancy sat around in our garden eating ice cream and watching Ryan and Megan playing together!"
She smiled slightly, "Whatever ice cream is I know I like it." She spoke with child like curiosity, "Who are Ryan and Megan?"
Jack winced and spoke quietly, "They're our kids, Sam. They never really knew you. You... died giving birth to Megan and Ryan was only three. They still miss you very much though..."
She frowned slightly and closed her eyes letting out a moan of pain again. He instinctively cuddled her closer to him as the ship began to shake and tremble slightly at the turbulence the ship experienced as it flew through the atmosphere of the planet.
Daniel staggered back to the Pel'tac as it flew through the clouds a pale, almost white, sun floating above them.
Teal'c spoke, "I believe this vehicle has sustained damage to the fuel tank. You must help repair this by doing as I say as I land this vessel."
Daniel nodded and gave a small gulp, "Sure. What's wrong?"
"The fuel is extremely flammable and has overheated considerably. During the landing process, it will ignite and this ship will detonate. We must prevent this." Daniel's eyebrows rose as the Jaffa said, "You must close off the tank from the remainder of the transport during the alighting procedure. I will notify you at which instant you will do this."
"OK," Daniel said nervously.
Teal'c spoke as he pulled the ship almost to a halt, "Warn O'Neill of our landing."
Daniel ran back to the room to find Sam draped in a blanket costume. It was similar to a toga and Jack was fastening a piece of cord he'd obviously discovered somewhere around her waist. He'd made a hole in the top which Sam's head was poking through. It covered her better than the `outfit' underneath.
Jack nodded to him when he entered, "Why have we stopped moving?"
"Teal'c needs to do something tricky. The gliders shot the fuel tank and it's seriously overheating. It has to be closed off during landing or else the ship will explode."
"Explode?" Sam asked frightened, her beautiful, confused eyes widening, "Explode as in..."
"Kaboom," Jack muttered. He looked at Daniel, "Anything we can do?"
"Teal'c told me I should help him to..."
Sam let out a cry and almost collapsed, but Jack managed to catch her before she hit the floor. Her scream still echoed around the room as Jack laid Sam on the floor gently as she began to shiver violently again.
Daniel continued, "I need to help him shut off the fuel tank from the rest of the ship at the moment he tells me to while he `lands' the ship."
"I'm guessing shutting off the gas will mean..."
"We're gonna crash land."
Jack nodded, "Ah."
Daniel pulled a hand through his hair, "There's probably somewhere you can sit on the Pel'tac. You better look after Sam and see if you can't find someway to stop yourselves from flying through the windscreen."
Jack nodded as he lifted the still crying woman into his arms and followed Daniel onto the Pel'tac. They discovered somewhere reasonably safe to lodge themselves and, with Daniel's help, Jack managed to secure them as best as possible. The small inlet was just big enough for them and Jack wedged himself in there so that he would take the brunt of any damage caused to them if the ship crashed too forcefully.
Sam screamed again from agony and Jack went back to trying to calm her down. By the sounds of things the landing was going to be difficult as it was without any distractions.
He pulled her close to him as they sat huddled in the inlet. As they began the descent she whispered, "I don't want to lose our baby, Jack."
At the words `our baby', Jack felt a fear like he'd only felt a few times in his life before. Losing Charlie and almost losing Megan had almost destroyed him. He didn't think he could lose this child as well... They had to get that damn snake out of her as soon as possible. She clung to him as tight as she could. He looked down at the woman. She was crying into his shoulder frightened, her eyes squeezed shut and her body shaking. The image made tears of his own form in his eyes as he placed a soft kiss on her forehead, whispering brokenly, "I'll get that thing out of you, if I have to sell my soul."
She shook her head, her sapphire eyes staring at him hopelessly, "There is no way. We won't get to the Tok'ra in time. Soon she will take control and kill our child." She let out another piercing scream and then managed to murmur, "I have to... get her out..."
Part Six
Daniel sat in the co-pilot's chair beside his stoic friend as the ship hurtled through the atmosphere of the planet. His chair shook violently as did most of the ship as Teal'c spoke, "Get ready to close the valve when I instruct."
Daniel gulped slightly and nodded to show he was ready. The Jaffa pointed to a button before Daniel. He couldn't help thinking how much this was like a bad Action movie. All they needed was the Evil bald guy with the fluffy white cat... Concentrate, Daniel!
Another air ripping shriek of pain sent shivers down Daniel's spine. He couldn't even begin to comprehend the pain Sam must be in, what with that Goa'uld messing with her head. If what Teal'c said was right the only reason the Goa'uld hadn't killed her was because it didn't have full control over her, but it could make her suffer.
As the aircraft continued to plummet through the planet's atmosphere, Daniel realised he needed to get a grip of himself. This was backed-up when Teal'c spoke anxiously, "Are you able to do this, Daniel Jackson?"
"Yes. I'm sorry."
Teal'c spoke, trying to keep Daniel alert whilst steering the vessel through the clouds as it jerked and shuddered due to turbulence, "You must try and ignore Samantha O'Neill, however torturous disregarding her is."
Daniel nodded his finger hovering over the correct button. The ship began to get very hot and Daniel could feel beads of sweat appearing on his forehead. Yet another unfathomable agony burnt through Sam as a scream was ripped from her throat. Daniel felt memories of Netu coming into his head. The heat and the scream of agony seemed to be distracting him. That was the problem the exposure to the hand device in the torture had had. His concentration was at an all time low. All he wanted to do was sleep. It was so warm...
"Daniel Jackson!"
Daniel jolted upright, his eyes opening swiftly. He spoke apologetically, "Sorry."
The drowsiness and lack of concentration were temporary, but he had to concentrate. If he didn't, they would all die. The ship was shuddering violently as they left the clouds. Daniel's teeth chattered together as he fought to stop his hand from touching the button too soon. After a few moments a red warning light began to flash and a Goa'uld Warning filled the air. The heat was almost unbearable and Daniel was shaking so hard he wouldn't be surprised if his brain was now scrambled like an egg.
Daniel stared at the approaching canopy before them as Teal'c yelled over the din, "Now!"
Daniel pushed the button as the ship began to hit the treetops and then hurtled downwards into the ground with a huge jerk and a flurry of soil spraying up from the ground. The screens and all the power switched off and the ship was sent into pitch black.
After a few seconds of confusion, Daniel spoke faintly, "Teal'c? You OK?"
From beside him came the familiar voice, "I am well, Daniel Jackson."
Daniel turned so he was looking behind him. The ship was sticking out of the ground so when he looked behind he was actually looking slightly upwards. He spoke worriedly, "Jack? Sam?"
Jack's voice came from the darkness, "My head's a bit sore, but I'll be OK. Sam's as well as can be expected, but the Snake's messi-..."
A cry of pain came from the pitch black and Jack's voice became an inaudible murmur. After a few moments he spoke again, "We have to get out of here."
Due to the fact the ship was sticking out of the ground at an awkward angle, it would be quite difficult to crawl out and open the trapdoor. Daniel spoke, "Don't move yet else you'll come sliding back down here with me and Teal'c."
Shuddery sobs could be heard from behind them as he heard Jack say distractedly, "OK," before going back to murmuring gently to his wife.
Teal'c spoke, "I shall attempt to climb up to the trapdoor and open it."
Daniel stared into the darkness behind and above him, "It's quite a steep slope, Teal'c. Be careful or you could slip down and hurt yourself."
"I will indeed take care."
He noticed as the shadow beside him unbuckled his belt and slid forward slightly so he was leant over the controls. He rolled onto his back so he was lying facing upwards. He grabbed either side of his seat and pulled himself forward, and then around the chair. Slowly the strong Jaffa began to walk forwards, holding onto the walls and hoisting himself upwards with his muscular arms. The ship creaked worryingly and the just visible figure stopped for a moment.
Teal'c spoke in Jaffa alarm, which was not very alarmed at all, "This vessel does not appear to be entirely stable!"
Daniel spoke nervously, "We probably haven't dug into the soil deep enough for it to hold the ship in this position for long. It's overbalancing slightly. The worst that'll happen is the ship with thud back down."
"I agree. I shall continue."
After a couple of minutes of grunts of exertion from Teal'c and cries of pain from Sam, there was a clunk and the trapdoor dropped open slowly, the pistons straining stopping the trapdoor from opening too quickly.
Hot daylight filled the cool dark. Though Daniel realised his glasses were lying on the controls smashed and broken, he could finally see a lot better.
He glanced back behind him. Jack and Sam still huddled in the small inlet. Sam was silent now her eyes closed which was completely disconcerting. She was still huddled in a ball and sat in Jack's arms as he watched her anxiously.
"Jack?" Daniel asked anxiously.
Jack spoke almost in shock, "She's out cold. The pain must've been terrible."
Teal'c spoke, yet again taking control of the situation. It was strange. Daniel was so used to Jack being the leader, but many things had changed since their time as SG-1... "O'Neill, you must help Samantha O'Neill to the trapdoor. Daniel Jackson, keep your chair restraint fastened. If Colonel O'Neill and his spouse join me the ship may be overcome by gravity."
"Right," Daniel muttered as he watched Jack get up grabbing Sam's limp body before she slid down and slammed against the controls, a fall that would most likely be fatal.
He watched as the man spoke with a strange tone of uncertainty and doubtfulness, "Do you reckon we could use the rope and hoist her up?"
Daniel looked at the man surprised as he continued, "If I tie it around her tightly Teal'c can hoist her out and it would probably be the best way to get her out. Teal'c can then rush her to the gate and me and you can crawl out of here in our own time."
"I take back ever calling you stupid or dense or well... anything!"
Jack smiled and then frowned at Daniel before turning back to Teal'c, "I'll throw you the end of the rope. Think you can catch it?"
Teal'c nodded, "It seems that during my absence from Earth and the SGC that you suddenly doubt my abilities, O'Neill." When he got no response, the Jaffa muttered as irritable as he could be, "It was an attempt at lightening the mood." The silence that followed his comment said it all! In what had to be the equivalent of a Jaffa sulk, Teal'c caught the end of the rope in his hand and immediately fastened it to one of the pistons on the trapdoor.
Jack tied the other end around his wife with as much care as he could. When he was ready, he stared down at the woman he loved. The woman he'd thought he'd lost realising for the first time that fate could still take her from him again...
"O'Neill?"
"I just... Will I see her alive again?"
The question was one not meant to be answered. He placed a soft kiss on her lips as he whispered, "Fight it, Baby. Please. Don't leave me again."
He stroked a stray strand of golden hair from her eyes as he nodded to the Jaffa slowly. Teal'c began hoisting the woman up gently and carefully as the ship began to creak and groan, debating whether or not it wanted to collapse.
Teal'c finally had Sam next to him. Jack spoke, his voice faint and full of pain, "Take her straight to the Tok'ra home world."
Teal'c nodded, "Once there, I shall send word back to Earth of our detour."
Jack spoke and Daniel could hear the fear in Jack's voice, "Hurry."
That one word sent the Jaffa into action. Teal'c hurriedly lowered Sam to the floor outside the ship and then climbed down the rope himself, before tossing it back in.
Teal'c shouted to them, "Both Samantha O'Neill and I will encounter you soon," before his heavy running steps began to fade as he ran for the gate.
The last two passengers of the Cargo ship sat in silence for a while before Jack whispered, "I can't lose her again, Danny. I've only just found her..."
Daniel spoke comfortingly from his position down at the front of the ship, "It'll be OK, Jack. The Tok'ra will get rid of the Goa'uld and, somehow, we'll transfer Sam back into her body."
Jack rubbed his eyes, either swiping at tears or blinking back tiredness as he whispered, "I hope you're right."
"Come on, Jack! I'm always right!"
Jack snorted at his friend's humour, which he appreciated a lot. After a few more seconds of silence, he grabbed hold of the end of the rope, gave it an experimental tug before murmuring, "Well, here goes nothing..."
~~~~~~
Teal'c ran as fast as his legs would carry him, Samantha O'Neill drooping over his shoulders. Ahead, his eyes finally fell on the Stargate in amongst the luscious green foliage, the white sunlight brightly illuminating it and showing it for all its wonder and glory.
He stopped by the DHD and lowered the unconscious woman to the floor with the utmost care before hurriedly dialling the Tok'ra home world as he wiped sweat beads from his forehead, the heat of the planet and the exertion of running with the dead weight of the woman causing him to pant slightly.
When the gate began to spin and finally create an event horizon, Teal'c released the breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding. All they'd needed was for the Gate to be inoperative to make matters worse.
He lifted the woman into his arms and sped up the steps and through the gate, stepping out onto golden sand dunes staring out across a barren desert. Barren indeed. All there was to see was warm sand, blue skies and the burning sun of this world. He stood by the Gate as a certain Colonel's voice echoed in his mind, `Now what?'
Suddenly, figures appeared from rings that came up from the ground before him, showering sand around. The people were heavily armed and dressed in the usual Tok'ra uniform. Teal'c's eyebrow rose as he recognised a few members of the group...
"Jacob Carter?"
The older man shook his head at the Jaffa, "It's a long story, but right now I need to get that thing out of my daughter."
"Let me assist you, Selmac," said Anise as she beckoned Aldwin and two other Tok'ra Teal'c didn't recognise to lift the stretcher and walk over to the tired Jaffa. He placed Samantha O'Neill down on the taut material before he followed the Tok'ra to the rings and into the blue crystal tunnels of their base, far beneath the warm sand.
~~~~~~
Sam sat with her son in the living room watching Simpsons as Janet and Cassie took it in turns to monitor them. Sam let out a sigh, hoping to God that Jack, Daniel and Teal'c were alright. No word from them since they stepped onto that planet and it left her feeling worried.
She also felt hope, however small it was. A hope that they'd found her body that they'd worked out a way to get her back in there. It would be difficult Sam knew. Apophis had told her that only the stronger consciousness could survive. And Sam hated to say it, but Megan was not the stronger.
She looked down at the body she now possessed and wondered what they could do to fix this mess. Immediately, worry returned. She worried about her husband and her friends, she worried she'd never get out of this body, she worried that Megan wouldn't make it, she worried that even if she did get back into her body, Jack wouldn't love her anymore and most of all... she worried Megan and Ryan wouldn't love her.
Sam looked up at Ryan, Megan's body moving in accord. She stared at the young boy. He had barely spoken to her since that night when she'd finally awoken. The coldness in the way he treated her made Sam feel heartbroken...
A silent tear ran down her cheek and she looked away from her son and at Janet that sat watching her anxiously. Janet raised her eyebrows questioningly.
Sam swiped the salty tear away from her cheek as she murmured in the childlike whisper of Megan O'Neill, "Nothing."
It was then the phone rang. Janet, strategically sat beside it, lifted it from its cradle in a millisecond. Her voice was desperate as she said obviously anxious for the safety of her own husband, "Hello?"
"Doctor."
Janet nodded earnestly, "General, any news?"
"They're all fine, Doctor. We were just contacted by Teal'c. They've got Sam's body. You're all needed at the base. ASAP."
Janet nodded and put down the phone before hurriedly getting them ready. Sam quickly pulled on the small pair of pink sneakers she'd discovered under the stairs as Cassie grabbed a coat from a peg and went to help put it on her when she dropped it, obviously realising what she was doing. Sam nodded slightly and gave a small smile of thanks as she pulled her arms through the child's black coat.
~~~~~~
"Jack, can we slow down?"
He turned to face his companion. The archaeologist's face was glistening with sweat and his cheeks were flushed from the heat of this planet. Jack sighed slightly, "Sorry."
Daniel caught up with him. He was slightly out of breath from the heat and the fast pace Jack had set. He wiped his eyes, obviously finding it difficult to see without his glasses and then smiled, "I'd be the same if it was Janet and Jonathon. You have nothing to apologise for. If it wasn't so hot I'd be trying to go twice your speed..." Daniel let out a whoosh of air from his mouth as he ruffled a hand through his hair, trying to stop it from being plastered to his forehead.
Jack nodded and pulled a hand over his brow, also wet with sweat. He sighed and then nodded to the trees nearby, "Let's sit in the shade for a minute or two."
They wandered over to the shade and collapsed against the tree trunks as Jack chuckled, "Should've asked Apophis for a few flasks of water before we left."
Daniel smiled widely, "Apophis! Hi there. Look we're just going to escape from your fortress with your Queen, shoot down half your guards and steal one of your ships and we were wondering if you could give us some water and food for the journey. You know... if it's not too much trouble!"
Jack snorted and then they rested in silence for a while. Daniel observed his friend, the older man unable to stop fidgeting. After a few minutes, Daniel murmured, "Come on. Let's get going again."
Jack's dark eyes rose to him in surprise as he murmured, "It's midday, Daniel. You're tired. We should rest a bit longer, at least till the sun starts to go down."
Daniel shook his head persistently, "I might be slightly uncomfortable walking to that Gate, but waiting here is killing you..." Jack's eyes lowered again as Daniel spoke gently as he held out his hand for his friend to take, "Come on, Jack."
Jack looked at the man's hand, sweaty and dirty and a small smile curved his lips as he took it and was helped to stand. He gritted his teeth in determination as he whispered, "Let's move out."
Daniel smiled, Jack seeing age in the man's features, "Just like old times." He slapped Jack on the shoulder as they began walking, "Just like old times."
~~~~~~
Her eyes fell on the man stood before her and suddenly she felt tears in her eyes, "Dad?"
He turned and when he saw her froze. He stared down at her and she saw his shoulders begin to tremble. His knees gave way and he fell to a kneeling position on the floor as the small child ran into his outstretched arms.
Jacob buried his face in her shoulder as he sobbed, "My little girl. My little girl."
The Tok'ra watched in silence as Janet's voice, husky with emotion, spoke quietly, "Sam?"
Jacob released her from his embrace as Sam looked up at her old friend, a woman who she usually was taller than. Janet sniffed slightly as she murmured, "There might not be much time."
It was then Sam began to recognise the other Tok'ra in the room. Aldwin, Per'seus and... Anise? Sam couldn't believe how much she had changed...
"Yes, Samantha. The later we wait the less likely the procedure will be a success."
Sam nodded still staring at the Tok'ra woman in surprise, "I understand, Anise."
The Tok'ra woman led them through the crystalline corridors of the Tok'ra Base before they entered a room. Two beds and some devices were set up in the room. Sam gulped slightly as her eyes fell on the figure lying in a bed already hooked up to the wires and breathing tube Janet had obviously provided before.
It was her body. Sam looked at Janet and then back at the almost corpse-like body, "Janet?"
Anise spoke up, "We have just removed the Goa'uld from her. She almost didn't make it." Anise then stepped closer to her, "We have no idea if this transfer will be successful. The technology is that of the Ancients and we have been studying it for some time. This will be the first time we have tried to put it into practice."
Janet spoke quietly, "It's your choice, Sam?"
Sam thought for a moment, suddenly becoming strangely aware of her daughter's presence within her. She stared at her body, lying before her and found the entire situation bizarre. It was a no win situation. If she stayed in this body, her daughter's consciousness would cease to exist and her husband and son would distance themselves from her. However, if she went through the procedure, Megan or herself or both of them could die and Jack and Ryan would have lost her and Megan all over again.
She sighed. It was worth the chance that her daughter could live, even if she could not...
"Let's get it over and done with," she said, speaking through her daughter's lips.
Janet nodded and helped her up onto a gurney. She linked her up to a heart rate monitor and other equipment as she told Anise to get the machine ready.
Sam's heart was beating furiously in her chest and she was nervous, but she sat their patiently and as calmly as possible as Janet put a drip into her arm. The small doctor then turned to the box beside her and pulled out a syringe and a bottle.
"Sam?"
She looked up at her Dad as Janet sucked up sedative and squirted a small amount out of the needle. He looked like he wanted to say something. He moved his jaw wordlessly for a moment before he whispered, "I love you, Sweetheart."
Sam nodded and then murmured, "Love you too, Dad."
Janet spoke sadly, holding the needle near the tube leading into her arm, "Are you ready Sam?"
She gritted her jaw as she whispered, "Yep."
Janet pierced the tube with the needle as she pushed the plunger of the syringe. The clear colourless liquid intermingle with the equally clear and colourless fluid in the drip. Janet released a long sigh, "Now we just have to wait."
They sat in silence for about 3 minutes until Sam felt her eyes beginning to close as a sudden terror filled her. She didn't want to close her eyes. She'd been forced into hibernation for 6 years and now she would be sleeping again, not knowing if she would ever wake up.
She looked over at Teal'c and Janet stood in the corner watching. Janet looked upset and Teal'c's arm circled the small doctor's shoulders. Sam wanted to speak out, make them stop this. She didn't want to sleep again. Not without seeing the people she cared about one last time.
She glanced at her father stood by the side of the bed as he turned to her. He started speaking, but all she could hear was a muffled sound. Sam stared at him, tried to grab his hand, but couldn't move. Her heart rate was slowing and her eyelids dropping as she fought to stay awake.
Suddenly, a Tok'ra ran to the doorway and spoke hurriedly to her father. He ran out of the door and Sam felt like crying. She began to panic, feeling claustrophobic, trapped in a body that was not her own. A body that was slowly shutting down into a coma-like sleep which she couldn't fight and there was no one to help her.
She stared at the doorway as sleep finally began to drag her into its darkened depths. Through her eyelashes, she watched the doorway as a shadowy figure appeared in the light. His chest and back were heaving as he'd obviously been running and he ran into the room throwing himself by her bedside. Her eyes focussed on his face for a split second, the rest of her vision a dim blur. He began speaking to her hurriedly although she couldn't hear a word.
His dark eyes told her everything she needed to know.
Her mind calmed and she realised why she'd been so terrified of sleeping. She didn't want to `die' again without seeing his face before she did. Without him being by her side...
Jack's palm came into contact with her small cheek as her eyes closed and all feelings evaporated, the last thing in her consciousness being him... And that was all that mattered.
~~~~~~
1 month later...
Daniel sat half dozing on a chair in the cool crystal corridors of the Tok'ra base. He shifted to one side in his sleep and wrapped his arms tighter around himself. The man slowly sat next to him, letting the man rest for a few seconds. He let out a sigh and gently shook the sleeping man's shoulder, murmuring, "Daniel...?"
The archaeologist's head jolted up as his eyes tried to focus on the man as he fished his glasses from his pocket, "Hey Jacob."
Jacob gave a small sigh, "Jack still in there?"
Daniel glanced at his watch and with a sad sigh murmured, "Probably, he hasn't left her bedside for over a week now. I think..." Daniel hesitated, "This is the longest he's been in there without rest, Jake. He's getting more and more worried he may lose her again as every day passes."
Jacob spoke quietly, "That is the most likely explanation." He glanced at the doorway and murmured, "Do you think... I mean, could I go in there?"
Daniel hesitated before he gave a small nod, "He's not in a fragile mood or anything just... a little bewildered by everything. Not to mention, her appearance is slightly worrying..."
Jacob stood up slowly and smiled, "Perhaps you should get some sleep, Daniel. It's been a month and you've had almost as little rest as Jack has. Your wife wouldn't be too happy with you if you came back in the condition you are now!"
Daniel gave a small chuckle and stood with a yawn, "Yeah. You're right. See you in the morning."
"Night," Jacob replied as the younger man stumbled off down the corridor in search of a more comfortable place to catch 40 winks.
Jacob stood watching him retreat for a moment before he turned and slowly moved into the room. The first thing he saw was Jack sat hunched staring at the floor. The second thing he saw was the beautiful golden hair spread out across the white pillow, glinting dully in the ethereal blue light that emanated from the walls...
"Jacob?"
Jacob's eyes left the sickly figure lying beneath the blankets as they met Jack's gaze. The man dropped his gaze and glanced over at the bed, his eyes falling on the pale face and a look of shock and dread in his eyes, "No change."
Jacob moved over to his son-in-law and placed a hand on his shoulder, staring down at his granddaughter, "She'll pull through. She's a strong kid..."
Jack's eyes never left Megan's face and slowly he reached out a hand to tenderly pull a lock of her golden hair from her eyes as he whispered, "I hope so, Jake."
Jacob squeezed the man's shoulder comfortingly before sitting himself next to him and deciding to tell him why he was really here, "Have you been to see Sam yet?"
Jack didn't look up from the sickly child as he mumbled, "No..."
Jacob sighed, Selmac's voice trying to dictate how to talk, although Jacob was not going to allow any interfering on her part. This was a human problem and Jacob was going to try and fix it with all the human he had in him.
"Jack, I know this is hard for me... God only knows how hard it is for you! But Sam needs you. When she wakes up she's going to be confused and... and she'll want to know why you're not there when she wakes up. I know you are worried about Megan; I am too, but... Megan's already woken up, however briefly. She already knows you are here for her..."
Jack sighed and then looked up with tears visible in his dark eyes, "She's dead. She's dead and yet she's now pregnant with my child." He let out a small laugh, "God, my life would make one hell of a soap opera!"
Jacob was about to speak when a soft voice came from the 5 year old child, whose baby blue eyes were now open and blinking slowly, "Daddy?"
Jack turned to his daughter and wiped away his tears as he smiled a true happy smile, "Hey Kiddo. How ya feeling?"
"Tired," the girl said hoarsely, her eyes looking around drowsily as she tried to blink back sleep, "Where's Mommy?"
Jack made a strangled choking noise at the girl's question. The two men stood in a completely flabbergasted silence as Megan repeated the question, "Where's Mommy?" She looked between them confused by their silence, "Daddy? Grandpa?"
Jacob answered quietly, "She's still sleeping, Sweetie. How do you know...?"
"The last thing I remember was her telling me not to be afraid and just try really hard to open my eyes," the little girl whispered to her grandfather before she murmured, "Is she sick?"
Jacob looked at the expression of horror on Jack's face, obviously disgusted that the small child had been aware of what was going on when her mother had taken over her body. If Jacob wasn't a Tok'ra and saw the idea as perfectly normal, he probably would've had the same reaction.
He cleared his voice and spoke softly, "She is still unwell, but Aunty Janet is doing everything she can to make her better again."
Megan yawned and looked at her father through hooded eyelids, "Daddy, tell me about Mommy. What's her name? Is she pretty?"
Jack sat there trembling slightly before he took in a small breath and whispered with a sad smile, "Oh, she's very pretty. She... She's a lot like you."
The little girl's sapphire eyes lit up even through her tired features in a very Sam-like expression of happiness. A sleepy smile came to her face, "Like me?"
Jack gave a soft chuckle and messed up her straggled golden hair with his fingers affectionately, "Yeah. Same eyes, same hair, same little smile..."
The girl giggled softly, still obviously nowhere near full health, "Is Ryan here?"
Jacob spoke, "He's staying with Aunty Janet, Cassie and Jonathon at the moment. In the morning, Aunty Janet will visit to check up on you."
Megan nodded and yawned, her eyelids drooping as she obviously began to drift off again.
Jack smiled gently, "Go back to sleep, Sweetie. Me and Grandpa are right here."
Megan smiled slightly before she whispered faintly, "Mommy said that she's sorry and that she doesn't know if she's going to be OK."
Jack looked at his daughter shaken as her eyes slid shut and she dozed back off into sleep, her ordeal still leaving her weakened and drained.
"Jack?"
He glanced up at his father-in-law, the man returning his look with anxiety. His head dipped and he began to speak as Selmac, "I have always believed you were the most resilient of Tau'ri. SG-1 were the elite and as I am Tok'ra you probably do not trust by beliefs, but these you may agree with. I decided that SG-1 were afraid of nothing, but it seems I was wrong. Jacob and I both understand how you feel, but why are you afraid of your wife?"
Jack stared at Jacob as the question entered Jack's head. He couldn't think of an answer. All he could see was a teenage Samantha Carter running with all the strength left in her tortured body and diving between him and that ribbon device...
"Jack?"
Jacob was staring at him worried. Jack just cleared his throat softly, "I'm not afraid of her, Jake. I... I love her like... like... I can't even describe it... It's like waking up for the first time in your life. Like... you've been trapped in a cage and suddenly the bars just melt away... and you're finally free..."
"Then why won't you go see her? Why won't you sit by her bedside and wait for her to wake up? Your daughter will be fine, despite her weak appearance. Your wife however is the one who is in the most danger."
Jack's voice rose, and if Megan had not been lying there, Jacob was sure the man would've been yelling, "Because I don't want to have to sit there for the rest of my life! I don't want to wait and wait with my hopes up and discover that, for the third time so far since I realised I was in love with Sam, she is never going to wake up!"
Jacob saw the pain in Jack's face and the absolute confusion and vulnerability in his eyes. He had no idea what it must be like for Jack at this moment. Jack was right though. First, she'd been in that coma after sacrificing herself to save him. Then, she'd died in that hospital leaving him a widower and father to a toddler and a newly born baby. Now... Now she was lying in a bed on an alien planet essentially sleeping. She wasn't in a coma, she wasn't dead... She was just asleep. But no one knew if she would wake up. There was no way of knowing.
Jack swiped another tear from his exhausted eyes as he mumbled, "I don't want to be sat in the Infirmary looking at the woman I'd die for covered in wires and tubes. I don't want to be numbly walking down a hospital corridor after losing the mother of my kids. I don't want to be sat in that cold room watching my wife sleeping, pregnant with my child and hear that she will never open her eyes again."
"Jack, I know how much you've been through because I've been through it too," Jacob whispered, "But whether you like it or not, Sam is your wife. She'll wake up confused, disorientated and probably without any idea why she's pregnant! She has a daughter she has never really met and who doesn't know her, having spent the five years of her life motherless. She has a son who is equally ignorant about his mom, but who has wished for her to be alive again so many times that now she is he's bewildered and upset. Neither of you can deal with this alone. Sam needs you. And even though you don't want to hear it, you need her more than you need to shut her out!"
Jack nodded mutely and the two men sat in silence, watching the weak little girl sleep peacefully. Without a word, Jack slowly rose. He placed a soft kiss on his daughter's forehead and stared at her for a second. He tucked the covers over her small shoulders and then step by step headed for the door. He hesitated and turned back to Jacob Carter, dressed in Tok'ra uniform and sat in the Tok'ra chair watching him supportively.
"Watch over my baby. Call me if there's any change."
Jacob smiled slightly, "Nothing and nobody will ever hurt my granddaughter while I'm here, Jack. You can count on that!"
Jack gave a weak imitation of a smile, although it was poor. He turned back to the door and paused for a moment before he stepped out into the blue crystal corridor and began to slowly make his way to Sam's room.
~~~~~~
"Of all the unpleasant surprises!"
The Tok'ra woman turned to him, her eyebrow raised slightly, "Colonel, I am the only one who can work this technology..."
Jack just shrugged and walked into the room, his eyes finally falling on Sam. Horrifying memories surfaced of her lying dead in the hospital bed on that April morning six years ago... Sam looked so... cold. Her skin was almost translucent it was so white. Her hair was plastered flat with sweat from her face and was combed back. She looked so lifeless; he couldn't believe the sound of her heartbeat on the monitor Janet had set up. It was steady, slightly sluggish, but otherwise sounded normal.
Slowly, Jack made his way to the chair beside his wife and lowered himself into it, his knee aching dully. Couldn't the Tok'ra invest in central heating?? It wasn't freezing, but it was pretty chilly down here...
Anise spoke again, avoiding his eyes as she began tinkering with a palm held device, "I am sorry for your wife's condition. I also apologise for not attending her funeral ceremony... I was on a mission... I hope Jacob Carter conveyed my condolences?"
Jack looked at the woman, dressed in grey, her clothing a lot more humble than the last time he'd seen her. Anise was... well, had been, a bit of a slut really. Now she was dressed in a grey dress, a lot less flattering, the skirt coming past her knees, the sleeves coming all the way down to her wrists and the neck line encircling her throat. Her blonde hair was slightly longer, just brushing her shoulder and was cut in a straight bob. She looked tired for a Tok'ra.
Jack suddenly felt a strange sense of guilt for being so horrid to her in the past. Alright, so she'd made a pass at him, not to mention had almost killed him on two separate occasions, but... Maybe it was the fact that his father-in-law was a Tok'ra that made Jack see them all in a much different light. Anise wasn't really that bad... she seemed so much different.
She looked up at him, waiting for a reply. He nodded, shaking away his pondering, his eyes sliding back to Sam, "Yeah... Uh... Thanks..."
Anise's voice changed to Freya's human tone, "You are uncomfortable with my voice?"
Jack looked back up at the woman in surprise, "No. Of course not."
Freya narrowed her eyes slightly as she looked at him before she smiled slightly, a small meek smile that Jack couldn't believe was coming from the same woman he'd known all those years ago. She gave an uncharacteristic chuckle as she said, "You have changed, Colonel."
"You're one to talk. And I'm not a Colonel anymore. Just call me Jack." he replied confused as to why he was having a friendly conversation with Anise/Freya! What the hell had happened? They were talking like old friends...
She sighed softly and continued to work. They sat in a comfortable silence for a while as Jack stared at his wife. His heart was aching for the woman, loving her so much. That night at Apophis's fortress, he'd tried to tell her how much he loved her, but he'd chickened out. He hadn't wanted her to have been slightly frightened away... He didn't really know why he'd been scared to say it; perhaps he'd been worried he'd lose her again or something... Maybe he thought not saying he loved Sam made it less true, which was a complete lie.
"You really care for her, don't you?"
Freya's voice was gentle and wistful and Jack glanced up at her again, slightly confused. She was staring down at Sam. She glanced at him then looked away, blushing slightly. She cleared her throat and her expression changed to a more stable one, less emotion visible.
Anise spoke again, "You have a very beautiful daughter. And also a son I believe?"
Jack, still slightly taken aback by the Tok'ra woman, nodded slowly, "Yes. Ryan."
"How old are your children? Jacob Carter has told me previously, but I do not remember."
Jack could see the conversation had become strained and awkward, but tried to ease the tension, "Well Ryan is 8 years old and Megan is 5."
Her head nodded and Freya began to speak again, obviously recovered from her past show of emotion, "I remember when I was growing up on Lhatiia. I was the oldest. I had 12 brothers and sisters." She smiled slightly, "My youngest sister was your daughter's age when I left to become a host..."
This conversation was so strange to Jack. He spoke quietly, "How old were you?"
She moved over to Sam, adjusting one of the Tok'ra devices as she spoke, "I was about 19 years of age." Jack realised how little she'd aged since he'd last seen her, well physically anyway. But in her mind and the way she acted she was so much more mature and mellow. It was a strange transformation and Jack looked back on the day he'd been glad to see her leave through the Gate with a strange sense of wonder.
She rubbed one hand over her eyes as she took the other chair beside Sam, finally stopping her tinkering. He glanced at her weary appearance, "Go get some sleep. If something happens, I'll give you a call..."
She nodded, her bluey-green eyes watching him in obvious confusion as she rose slowly. She inclined her head, "Good Night, Colone... Jack."
He smiled tiredly himself, "You too."
She left the room, her leather shoes making a soft almost inaudible tread as she left the room made of blue crystal.
Jack's hand found Sam's warm fingers. He gently squeezed her hand as he sighed softly, his other hand reaching to her face and moving a wisp of her unruly hair from her eyes, the strand conforming back into the brushed back style of her hair. He smiled softly to himself, when he felt slight pressure on his own hand, before it relaxed. Whether it was a reflex reaction or whether it had been Sam, Jack had no idea, but that small movement gave Jack hope. A grin burst across his face and he slumped back in the chair, his hand still holding hers gently as he sighed, his eyes fixed on the woman he loved...
~~~~~~
"Selmac, may I enter?"
Jacob turned to see Anise stood in the doorway. He smiled slightly and spoke in a hushed tone, "Of course. She's sleeping."
Anise returned the small smile as she walked over to the Tok'ra equipment, "I wish to check on the child before I go to get some rest."
Jacob winced slightly, "I only just remembered. I'm sorry about Jack. He's a bit grumpy at the moment. Hasn't slept in a while..."
"Oh no, Jacob," it was Freya that spoke this time, "He was... fine."
Jacob watched the woman, trying to place all her concentration on the devices although Jacob knew it was just her way of avoiding speaking. Jacob was slightly confused. Neither Jack nor Anise had seen or spoken to each other since the Zaytarc incident and Jacob was pretty sure Jack O'Neill still held a grudge against the woman for what had happened.
"He was... fine? Are we talking about the same man?"
Freya gave a soft laugh, "It appears so. At first, he still seemed to hate me, but he does no longer, I believe. We even had a conversation of good length considering..."
"Freya..." Jacob said as it dawned on him. The woman looked up at him, her eyes widening slightly as they stared at each other levelly.
She dropped his gaze and after a moment Anise spoke in a hurried voice, "I must get some rest."
"You're still in love with hi...?"
Anise interrupted abruptly, in a quiet but almost angry tone, "I do not wish to talk about this..."
She strode out of the room as Jacob followed her, "But I do. Do you think anyone can accept how much you've changed as just down to you?"
She didn't reply and continued to walk down the corridor and into her quarters. Jacob stopped in the middle of the corridor, deciding not to follow her. She needed time to think. He trudged back into his granddaughter's room, retaking the chair beside her.
"Selmac, the Tau'ri are here. They have just gated to the surface."
Jacob had been a bare millimetre from sitting down when he stood up again and turned to Aldwin. Selmac spoke, "Teal'c?"
The young Tok'ra nodded, "Yes and Dr. Jackson's wife. I shall go meet them. Do you wish to accompany me?"
Jacob glanced at the tiny girl beneath the covers, sleeping peacefully, "I'll meet them, but Aldwin I want you to stay here with my granddaughter."
Aldwin did not argue, although his eyebrow rose slightly. Without a word he seated himself beside Megan and Jacob left the room. He strode down the corridor towards the rings, a thousand things running through his head, the main one being the hope that Janet could bring Sam back. He stepped into them and pressed the button on the wrist device.
The rings whooshed up around him and in a flash of light he was on the planet surface. It was just before dawn on the planet, pale light coming from the horizon although the hot sun was yet to rise on the desert world.
The Gate was still illuminated; closing off the second he stepped towards Teal'c and Janet. Janet's son, Jonathon, was sat on the Jaffa's shoulders, the tall man seeming rather amused by the small child. Cassie was with them, holding Ryan's hand, the boy looking scared and unsure before he saw his grandfather. The eight-year-old ran and hugged him as Janet spoke anxiously, "How are they?"
"They're fine. Megan's been awake more than once, but Sam's still in the same condition. I sent Daniel off to get some sleep an hour or two ago, so I wouldn't disturb him for the moment."
"And what of O'Neill?" Teal'c gently lowered himself so the small doctor could retrieve her son from his shoulders.
Jacob sighed, "Well, I finally managed to convince him to check on Sam. Anise was in there..."
Janet looked at him shocked, "Oh no. What happened?"
They began to walk towards the ring platform, hidden beneath the sand, Teal'c now carrying Janet's medical equipment. Jacob continued with a confused shrug, "Apparently nothing."
"But Jack hates her... doesn't he?" Cassie said quietly to her mother who was just as confused as she was.
The rings surrounded them, Ryan gasping in horror as Jonathon just giggled slightly. They appeared in the Tok'ra tunnels as Janet spoke to Cassie, "Cassie, take Jonathon and Ryan to whatever room Jacob finds you and try and get them to get some sleep..."
"I want to see Megs."
Jacob turned to his grandson, "Alright, but just for a little while."
Ryan nodded earnestly before he opened his mouth to speak again. He closed it and then licked his lips before he whispered, "And Mom? Can I see her too?"
Jacob glanced at Janet and sighed softly, "Maybe tomorrow."
Ryan nodded showing he understood as Teal'c placed a hand on the boy's shoulder comfortingly, leading him and the doctor towards the rooms where Megan and Sam were staying.
Jacob sighed again and then turned to Cassie and smiled at the woman, her little brother in her arms. He motioned for them to move down a different corridor as Cassie murmured, "You think she'll make it?"
Jacob didn't look at her for a few seconds before he replied softly, "I have no idea. We adapted technology so it may work for her, but we have no idea if it was effective. All we know is that it successfully removed Sam from Megan's mind and that Megan's consciousness is still intact..."
"But you don't know if Sam's back in her body," Cassie finished off his statement sadly.
Jacob put a hand between her shoulder blades propelling her into the Guest quarters. He had tried to make this room more similar to the ones on Earth, knowing that the Tau'ri would find it difficult to sleep in there, especially the children.
"JACOB! JACOB! SHE'S WAKING UP! JACOB!"
Janet came skidding down the corridor, the small woman moving with surprising speed as she began to gabble, "I can't believe it, but her pulse is quickening slightly and... She's waking up!"
Jacob almost immediately left Cassie and her small brother in the corridor as he followed the doctor, the two of them almost sprinting down the corridors to Sam's room.
The first person Jacob noticed was Jack O'Neill knelt beside her bed staring at her face, whispering under his breath. Anise stood slightly away from the bed watching the scene almost sadly. As they entered both of them glanced up at them.
"Jake, she's waking up. I know she is."
Jacob nodded and stepped towards his son in law, placing a hand on his shoulder. Jack was shivering slightly, Jacob noticed pitifully. He knew exactly what it felt like to lose a wife so young, but he couldn't begin to understand how it would feel to see her come to life again before his eyes.
They stayed in the same position for nearly an hour, Sam's vital signs becoming stronger and stronger and Jack's shivering becoming more and more noticeable.
Her eyelids were flickering as if she were in an R.E.M. sleep. Slowly, flashes of blue were visible in between the miniscule gap provided by her eyelashes as her eyelids opened slightly. Jack was now shaking quite violently and Jacob felt his knees trembling, his legs feeling as though they would give way beneath him.
Everyone was transfixed by Sam as her eyes opened sluggishly. She stared up blinking a few times, a small frown on her forehead as she tried to focus her eyes. Her eyes fell on Jack's face as he watched her, thrilled yet terrified.
After a second, he whispered, "Sam?"
She opened her mouth and a raspy sighing noise came as she tried to speak, "Yeah..." She coughed slightly as her vocal chords began to get used to working again. After a second or two she spoke, her voice still hoarse from where the Tok'ra had removed the Goa'uld, "Did it work?"
Jack was smiling with unbelievable happiness, his eyes glistening as he said, "Yeah. It worked."
"And Megan?"
Jack took her hand in his, smoothing his fingertips over her wrist and fingertips as he nodded with a small choked laugh of relief, "She's fine. Well on the way to recovery."
Sam smiled weakly before she whispered, "I can't wait to meet my daughter."
Janet spoke up, "You will, but she's still not well enough to visit you and you are nowhere near. Give it a day maybe two."
Sam nodded and then croaked, "Thank you..."
Jack spoke, "No offence to the Doc, but Anise is the one you should be thanking."
Janet smiled at her Tok'ra counterpart, "Yes, it was Anise that's been here with you constantly."
Sam moved her head ever-so-slightly so she looked at Anise. The Tok'ra woman was stood there watching her with a meek smile, so un-Anise-like it surprised Sam.
She cleared her throat then breathed, "Thanks..."
"You're Welcome."
Janet spoke gently after a second, signalling for Jacob and Anise to leave with her, "We'll leave you two alone. Get some sleep, Sam. We'll come see you in the morning."
"Night Guys," Jack said gratefully as he watched them all retreat out into the passage.
He turned back to Sam, looking at her small smile and breathtaking eyes. She looked tired and pale, but there was now a strange sense of life about her again and Jack felt himself falling in love again almost immediately.
He cleared his throat after a second, "I..." He began to delve into to his jacket pocket and after a second pulled out his hand his fist clenched. Sam watched his hand in fascination as after a second his fingers uncurled and displayed two rings that Sam recognised so well.
"I... I..." Jack's voice was shaking slightly and Sam felt pity for him. The thought of living 6 years of her life thinking he was dead and raising their children alone was enough to make her want to cry. He cleared his throat again, obviously finding hard to say the right thing.
He didn't need to.
Sam squeezed his hand slightly and his dark eyes rose to her face. She tried to show him her answer in her expression, her voice painful too use. She wished that she wasn't so weak, just so she could grin or hold him or kiss him. She was reminded so vividly of when she'd been so weakened by the Fountain of Youth fiasco. She remembered feeling she was so useless that Jack would never love her... And then they'd got married and had kids. They'd been through so much and she loved him more than she could ever express. She just hoped her feeble smile was enough for now.
A grin lit up Jack's face and as if answering her hope he slipped the two rings onto her finger with so much care that Sam knew he was terrified of hurting her.
This moment reminded her so much of when she and Jack had first gotten together, after the Fountain of Youth incident. Jack had been so scared of damaging her further, already blaming her injury on himself. It had only been when Sam had yelled at him telling him to `Just snog me already!' that how silly he was being.
Jack smiled and stood up slightly; kissing her gently on the cheek as he whispered into her ear, "Get some sleep. I'm right here."
She nodded, realising for the first time how heavy her eyelids had become, closing her eyes and drifting off to sleep in a matter of seconds.
Jack sat by her bedside all night, watching her sleep. He sighed softly as he watched her. It had been so long since they'd first met and so much had happened to the both of them. Who would've thought they'd get here with so much stood in their way, so many obstacles? And yet...
Jack smiled as he murmured to the silent room, "And yet here we are..."
~~~~~~
Sam lay in the azure calm of her room, thinking about everything. Her hand moved to her stomach, her palm lying against her abdomen where her child would be growing. The thought was strange. She could not remember anything that had happened to her in Apophis's palace, except for residual flashes of memory in her head. The clearest, and only one Sam could really decipher, was the image of Jack stood before her in her room as suddenly she remembered him.
It had been a few days since she'd woken up in the correct body and been informed of her pregnancy and the fact she'd be here with the Tok'ra for quite a while. Janet was not going to let her back to Earth until she was satisfied Sam was well enough to go through and knowing Sam's past medical history, the worst of which spanning over the past decade or so, Sam knew Janet would not be letting her go home for at least 2 months. Janet was scared of her dying suddenly again, just like everyone else.
She sighed softly and looked up with surprise at the woman who'd just entered.
"Sorry if I startled you."
Sam smiled slightly at the Tok'ra who'd cared for her so well since she'd woken, "Oh no. I'm fine, Anise." She chuckled slightly, "I finally managed to get everyone to give me some peace and quiet."
Anise nodded slightly, moving over to the gadgets and taking reading like she did everyday. After a while, she murmured in her human voice, "You are a very lucky woman, Samantha."
Her eyes rose to Freya, catching a glimpse of a tear fall from the Tok'ra's eyes before Anise took control of the body, hiding all signs of unhappiness. Sam had noticed the change in Anise, as had everyone. She was so completely different to when they'd first met.
Sam spoke quietly, "I know I'm lucky. Luck is the only explanation for some of the things that have happened in my life."
Anise nodded, Freya coming back to the surface. She began to leave before she turned to face Sam again. Her voice was soft and painful, "He loves you, you know. He loves you a lot."
Something finally clicked into place in Sam's head as she stared at the Tok'ra woman. Jack had told her about Freya during the Zaytarc incident, but she'd never realised...
Freya continued, her eyes staring off into space, "I knew from the moment he said `no' to me that he was in love with you..." She sighed gently, "I was not surprised when you got married. Jacob was always so happy leading up to your wedding, telling us how you were pregnant with his grandchild..."
Sam spoke, feeling sympathy for the Tok'ra woman, "You love him, don't you?"
Freya looked up in shock before she nodded slightly and then continued, "Out of every man I could have fallen for, I fell for him..."
"How could you have looked after me and Megan?" Sam said shocked at the woman's bravery, "How could you have cared for us...? It must have been killing you..."
Freya shook her head, a small smile curving her lips, "He needs you, Samantha. If he'd lost you and your daughter, I would've never forgiven myself..." She stared at her for a second, "I will not say I am not jealous of you because I am, but he loves you and he loves your children. I know he will never love me, but I have finally accepted it. It took me all these years since I heard you were to be married, but I will finally..." She stopped mid-sentence and smiled slightly, "I do not really know what I will do. I like how I have become. The only part I miss is I used to smile and laugh more, but I will fix that."
Sam felt a strange urge to cry at the woman's loneliness, but instead she smiled tiredly, "You deserve to be happy and who knows... there are still many fish in the sea..."
Freya frowned, "I do not understand..."
Sam chuckled, "It means there are a lot more guys out there who will love you and you will love in return," Sam grinned, "You never know. That guy might be just round that next corner or the next or the next."
Freya nodded and smiled brightly, "I am sure he is! Goodnight Samantha and get some rest."
Freya stepped out into the corridor walking straight into Sgt. Davis. The technician's glasses fell to the floor as Freya apologised, "Forgive me. I was not looking where I was going..."
"Oh no, Ma'am," Walter replied, "I was on my way to visit Major Cart... Mrs. O'Neill and I wasn't taking enough care." He found his glasses and put them on staring at Freya in surprise, "Freya and Anise, right?"
Freya smiled, "Yes. And you are one of the Gate technicians?"
He held out his hand obviously in awe of her, "Yes." She took his hand still smiling beautifully, "My name's Walter Davis... Sgt. Walter Davis."
Freya released his hand, "It was a pleasure meeting you, Walter."
They continued to stare at each other before Freya blushed and gently murmured, "Excuse me," pushing past the man and walking down the corridor, the Sergeant's eyes following her, causing Sam to burst into laughter.
Walter stepped into the room grinning at her, "Sam! It's been so long..." He looked at the woman laughing happily to herself, "Sam? What... What's funny?"
Sam just smiled at her dear friend as he stepped closer to her, "Oh no reason. I just think that Anise has caught herself a fish!"
Walter frowned confused as Sam began chuckling again, the Tok'ra halls filling with the beautiful sound of laughter. The sound travelled down the corridors to where Jack sat with his daughter sleeping, snoring softly.
Jack recognised the joyful echo immediately and felt a warm feeling touch his heart. How he'd missed her laughter. He leant back in his chair as a small smile came to his face and closed his eyes, the sound of Sam's delight sending a shiver through him.
Jack sighed gently as he whispered, "I missed you, Baby. I missed you a lot..."
~~~~~~
2 Months Later...
As they stepped out of the car Sam stared up at her home nervously. The car journey had been strangely silent. Her children were still slightly unused to the idea of having a mom and though it seemed strange to her, they almost couldn't quite get their heads around the fact.
She sighed slightly. Jack had been quiet too. In fact, he'd seemed rather distant. Sam guessed he was just as uncomfortable and unsure as the children and Sam felt upset that she hadn't been welcomed back with open arms. But what had she really expected? 6 years is a very long time from all their perspectives...
"Come on. You must be tired," Jack said, giving her a tiny smile. She nodded and wandered up to the front door as Jack got Megan out of the car. She was fast asleep. Although completely healthy, Megan would get fatigued much easier these days, Janet said. The sleepiness would just be temporary, but until it wore off letting the 5 year old get as much sleep as possible would be for the best.
Ryan walked behind his father up to the doorstep, keeping his distance from her and that alone broke Sam's heart. Her son didn't know her and from what Jack had told her, only vaguely remembered her. Sam, however, could remember watching Ryan, as if it were yesterday, playing with a ball in the garden, getting filthy and giggling in the way that only 3-year-olds can when they are getting ridiculously grubby.
They stepped inside and Sam yawned. She, like her daughter, was exhausted; having been through the gate for the first time in what felt like forever and coming home with her family had made this day very emotionally draining.
Jack spoke to Ryan softly, "I'm putting Megan to bed. Don't watch TV too loudly, OK?"
Ryan spoke as he walked into the living room, "Ya sure you betcha, Dad."
Sam chuckled softly as she said, "He's so much like you, you know."
"I've noticed," he replied as they climbed the flight of stairs. Sam stood on the landing as Jack put Megan to bed, slightly unsure what to do with herself.
After a few minutes he came back out, gently closing the kids' bedroom door slightly. He stepped closer to her, rubbing the back of his neck as he did when he felt slightly awkward, "You'll... uh... You'll have to stay in the spare room for the moment..." Jack stared at his feet and then up at her as he mumbled, "I got rid of the double bed when you..."
His voice trailed away and Sam took her queue to save him from anymore awkwardness, "That's OK. It would be... weird anyway."
"Yeah," he said quickly before looking up at her. He gave her a small smile and then tentatively he stepped forward and kissed her gently. Sam's hand moved to hold the back of his neck as they kissed softly.
Jack pulled away and cleared his throat before giving her a small smile. He moved past her towards the spare room and opened the door, flicking on the light.
Sam followed him inside and after a few seconds of silence Jack muttered, "Get some sleep."
She nodded and he went to leave. She spoke up hurriedly, "Jack?"
He turned, "Yeah?"
Sam stared at him and suddenly felt like crying. After a pause she murmured, "Nothing. Night."
He looked her up and down for a second before he whispered, "They'll get used to it soon. They're just not used to... used to you."
She nodded as he left closing the door behind him. Sam closed her eyes and let out a small sigh. Her hand moved to her bump as she dropped on the single bed. After she murmured to the empty room, "I hope it's not only them who'll get used to me..." She felt a tear roll down her cheek as she whispered shakily toward her unborn child, "Otherwise, me and you are on our own, Kiddo." She sighed and wiped her fingers over her teary eyes, hugging her pillow close to her and burying her face in it as she cried softly before weariness overcoming her and she fell into a cheerless sleep.
~~~~~~
Jack had thought he'd get a proper night's sleep for once, now Sam was alive, healthy and home again, but he'd still awoken at some ungodly hour of the morning. He'd climbed from his single bed, pulled on a pair of old sweats and wandered onto the landing. He'd stared at the door to the spare bedroom which was open ajar and with much debate had finally decided not to check on his wife.
To keep himself busy, he'd silently got Sam's clothes down from the attic. Every box was full of clothes, many of which people would not be caught dead in 6 years after Sam had last worn them, but until he could take her shopping and buy her some other things they'd do.
He'd spent the rest of the morning, ironing some of her clothes and washing any items which were dirty. When he'd finished this task, he'd set about trying to make the place as akin as he could to how it had last been for her, although he had no idea why.
Now he was in the kitchen, leaning against the worktop and thinking about how his life would become topsy-turvy yet again. He almost jumped when he heard soft footsteps coming down the stairs and stared at the doorway leading to the hallway.
When the woman stepped into the kitchen, Jack felt like rubbing his eyes or pinching himself. Samantha O'Neill stood before him, no longer a ghost in a dream, no longer his terminally ill wife and no longer his unattainable 2IC.
She was dressed in the pyjamas Janet had lent her. Her hair was longer than he remembered and was ruffled from restless sleep. Her eyes were a soulful azure, tears blurring her vision also. One rolled down her pale cheek, a droplet of self-hatred, misery and pain.
His eyes fell on her stomach, a bump already beginning to form causing her plain white t-shirt to stretch ever-so-slightly, revealing barely a centimetre of her skin between the hem of the shirt and the waist band of her pants.
She spoke quietly, "I went to check on the kids. I hope you don't mind?" The slight uncertainty in her voice was emphasised as the sound of his wife's soft voice reverberated off his eardrum, it was harsh and cold. She actually thought she had to ask if it was ok to see her children and the thought made Jack hate himself for treating her as he had.
When she got no immediate reply, she pushed past him, causing him to shiver imperceptibly. She moved around the kitchen automatically, as if she'd never been dead... gone for 6 years. He found his voice and managed to murmur, "No. Of course not."
She glanced at him for a split second before turning away again. She spoke, trying to sound annoyed, but the soft sound of her suppressing tears was enough to convince him it was just a faade, "There are no pictures... There is nothing to suggest I was your wife, let alone a living, breathing woman! How long did it take you to forget me? A year, a month, a week?"
It was Jack's turn to hide behind a mask of anger, "I NEVER forgot you! I could never forget you! I spent every fucking second of every day for the past 6 years thinking about you! I've not stopped since our first day at the SGC! I don't think I could ever stop thinking about you because I can never stop loving you! I can NEVER stop loving you! I've had to raise two children alone in a world where they spend every day in hiding under aliases so the media can't get to them and ruin their lives like they ruined mine! Like they ruined your memory with cheesy monuments and stuff all over the shot! All the time it drove a stake in my heart because you were dead and I couldn't even live without you!"
She flinched with everything he said, but he had to let it out. All the pent up emotions that had been draining his life for so long, "Christ Sam, what the hell do you think I've done for the past 6 years? Just slept with every whore I could find? Cashing in on your death by sanctioning action figures and movies and TV series? I've been fighting this all along! The day before you showed up in Megan's body, I was in court with Janet, fighting against some movie they were going to make about me and you!"
He deflated slightly, his voice becoming a broken whisper, "How could I forget you when I'd see you in my head, a teenage girl, with a purpling bruise across the side of your face as you lie in a coma covered in wires and tubes? Every time I fell asleep I'd see you walking down the aisle towards me, your legs in braces beneath your dress, but the beautiful smile on your face telling me you loved me! Every minute of my life for the past 6 years I've remembered the day you first walked again, without crutches, without leg braces, holding Ryan in your arms as you came to greet me! Every second of every day, I relived the moments when I woke to find you were dead, our son in your arms...!"
It was at that point she turned back to the kitchen surface. Her hands were trembling as she set about making herself a piece of toast. He noticed her skin was covered in small Goosebumps and felt himself hating himself yet again. Jack stood in the same position, frozen, just watching her. God, he loved her so much it hurt!
It was only once she dropped the knife 3 times on the surface with a dull, metallic clang that she let out a soft gasp, which led to another and another, until her body was shaking with gasped sobs. Her hands gripped the edge of the kitchen surface as he saw a tear fall to the surface, a bead of water shattering into tiny glittering pieces.
He took a hesitant step towards her, wondering what to do. He didn't know if he should hold her or leave her alone or ask her permission to hug her. He had no idea anymore and it scared him. So he did what he thought was right.
He touched her lightly on the shoulder and murmured, "Sam?"
She turned to face him and he saw the strange confusion and pain in her eyes. He couldn't even begin to realize what this must be like for her. He'd been so caught up in his own pain, his own sense of being lost, that he'd never stopped to realise just how hard this must be on her. Her breathtaking eyes looked away from him, almost as if she couldn't bear to look at him.
That one action made Jack's heart yearn for her even more. He lifted a hand and delicately swiped the tears from her face as she stared at him in shock, more tears falling all the time. Her eyes slid shut in anguish and she turned away from him whispering brokenly, "Please don't."
Jack was stood, his hand not having moved from where her cheek had been. His fingers, still moistened from her tears brushed some of her golden hair. The action caused her to tremble harder and she gasped preventing a sob from escaping her lips.
Jack couldn't bear this anymore. His wife was upset, more than upset, and he was the cause. He sighed angry with himself and took a step closer to her. His arms slid around her stomach and he squeezed slightly pressing his chest up to her back as he whispered, "God I'm so sorry, Sam. I shouldn't have let all my anger out on you. None of this is your fault."
She was still shivering, her arms moving around his own and clasping his wrists from where they were wrapped around her. She leant back slightly in his arms and continued to cry silently as she stared out of the window above the sink.
Slowly, he swivelled her around and stared into her eyes for a second. He gave her a small smile, feeling tears of his own blurring his vision slightly. He sniffed, "You've always been so strong. I've never really told you how proud I've always been of you. I was proud of Samantha Carter for being intelligent, strong and brave amongst many things. I am proud of Samantha O'Neill for her strength and determination. You spent so long fighting against the damage to your nervous system after what happened with Apophis and... I was so proud of you, Baby. Don't give up on us now. Everything is going to be OK, I promise you. Please don't give up on us."
She stared back in his eyes and he knew she didn't think so. She buried her head in his shoulder, her hands moving up his back as she began to sob heartbrokenly. He kissed her hair, holding her, the feeling of her in his arms long missed. He kissed her ear softly as he breathed, "I promise you. We always fight our way through, Sam. Remember..." He pulled back and said seriously, "O'Neills are stubborn son-of-a-bitches!"
She laughed slightly and he saw her smile. The relief her smile gave him was indescribable. He grinned and she laughed again as she threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. After a few seconds, he said lovingly, "And you are an O'Neill. We are all O'Neills."
She pulled back again, wiping away her tears and sniffling slightly before taking his hand and placing it on her stomach as she whispered with a beautiful smile, "All five of us."
~~~~~~
Epilogue
1 year later
"Jack, will you hurry up? We're going to be late!"
Jack passed the stairs and called down, "Ryan can't find his jacket! Where's Jamie's bag?"
"I already put it in the car!" Sam called back to her husband as she glanced at her six year old daughter, looking rather cute as she smiled a slightly gappy smile and then tutted at her father and brother. Sam grinned and muttered to the small girl, "Two seconds, Sweetie."
Sam ran up the stairs, smoothing a crease in her summer dress. She moved into the kid's bedroom, Ryan was searching through his wardrobe hurriedly, "Mom, I can't find it!"
Her eyes rose to the heavens, "That's because it's downstairs on the hanger where I told you it was yesterday."
Ryan turned around his brown eyes scowling at her, "I knew that!"
She laughed brightly and knelt down in amongst the mess on the floor, "Come here."
With a comment of annoyance from her son, she began to adjust his shirt and jeans and when he went to move away she grabbed his shoulders, "Stand still for a second!"
"Aww Mom!"
Sam fought the urge to snigger as she muttered, "Look at your hair! It's as unruly as your father's!"
She grabbed a comb from the side and tried to make the mop of fair hair look neater, although it worked very slightly and refused to be combed into an acceptable position.
She gave up as Ryan muttered, "Finally!" He sped out of the room and downstairs as Sam shook her head and began to pick up toys strewn across the room, throwing them into the box. She felt a hand on her back and stood up straight. She turned to face Jack with a smile, his arms held around her as he smiled back.
He nodded his head to the door that their son had just stormed out of and said with a slightly raised eyebrow, "Have you noticed how Ryan's getting rather..."
Sam chuckled, "Yeah. He must get it from you!"
He kissed her tenderly and whispered in a sarcastic tone, "Of course, Dear."
She laughed as their baby son began to wail in protest at being left in his cot. She spoke as she walked to their room, "Have you got the wedding present?"
"Yeah," he said lifting it off the dresser as Sam moved to the baby's crib.
She looked down at her small son, his face pink and scrunched up where he was crying, "Aww Mommy's little man feeling left out?" She lifted him up gently, holding him to her as she jiggled him in her arms ever so slightly, "Shh shh shh. It's OK, Sweetie. We're going now."
She kissed his head, covered in soft dark hair as she glanced at Jack. He was leant against the door frame, a strange smile on his face, watching her and his baby son lovingly. She grinned and he smiled back, "I'll go put the other two in the car."
She nodded as he left and she looked around the room for something she might have forgotten as her son's cries turned to hiccoughs. She patted his back gently until he let out a tiny burp. She grabbed a hankie and placed it over her shoulder, prepared for the drooling Jamie.
She slowly left the room and moved downstairs, giving the house a once over for anything she may have forgotten. She noticed that for once Jack had done the washing up without her asking him to. She smiled to herself as she moved to the front door where Jack was stood, two denim jackets folded over his arm, his own shades propped on his head and another pair in his hand. She smiled as she put her shades on and Jack grabbed Jamie's cap from the coat rack, shading the baby's face from the sun.
"Sun block?"
"I've already done Megs and Ryan and put it in Jamie's bag," Jack said, "Have you done Jay?"
She nodded and sighed, "You ready?"
He grinned, "As ready as I'll ever be!"
Sam shook her head with a small laugh as they both left the house closing the door behind them.
~~~~~~
Jack watched his beautiful wife, stood in the shade of the tree that grew at the end of the Jackson's backyard. The beautiful summer's day would end in an hour or so, but it was still as warm as it had been at midday, Sam having taken their baby son into the refuge from the blazing sun.
Megan and Jonathon were playing a game of tag with a little Jaffa child, Isa'c, the son of Rya'c's best man, Jar'ec. The wedding had been beautiful, Chulak was beautiful in its autumn months and now Rya'c and Cassie had returned from their honeymoon, the proud parents were holding a barbeque here on Earth. Jack had never seen Teal'c smile so much and Janet and Daniel were just the same. Jack would miss them all when Daniel and Janet moved to Chulak as well.
Sam was talking with Bray'tac, both of them laughing. Jamie was fast asleep, his chubby cheek pressed on the handkerchief strategically placed on Sam's shoulder as the baby dribbled. General Hammond was talking with Cassie and Rya'c, the couple hugging each other. Various members of the SGC were talking with various members of the Jaffa resistance. The weather was gorgeous and everything seemed perfect in Jack's world.
Jack began to think about his own children getting married. He'd be ancient by that time! He snorted slightly to himself, thinking about his two sons and his daughter.
He wandered over towards Bray'tac and Sam...
"... I am very happy for you."
Sam glanced at the baby, his podgy fingers gripping loosely to part of the handkerchief, "We're very happy too."
"You deserve it, Samantha. You have been through so much."
She turned to him, smiling her irresistibly beautiful smile, "Thank you, Bray'tac. For everything you did for us."
Bray'tac glanced at Jack as he finally reached them. He smiled and bowed his head to both of them, "It was an honour. Now I must speak to Hammond of Texas. It has been a long time."
Jack winked at Bray'tac as Sam turned. She gave a small jump, "Jack!"
"Still got skills with stealth then!"
She glared, "If I wasn't holding your son, I would hit you!"
Jack and Bray'tac chuckled, the old Jaffa master speaking, "You are feisty like many Jaffa women. O'Neill does not realise what he has let himself in for."
Jack smiled, "Oh I know exactly what I've let myself in for." He pulled a hand around Sam's shoulder as he said to Bray'tac, "Thanks again, Bray'tac."
He just inclined his head and strode away towards the Texan General.
Sam sighed softly turning to him. Jack smiled, closing the space between them, his arms wrapping around her lower back as they both stared at the baby sleeping in Sam's arms.
"He's beautiful, isn't he?" Sam whispered in a voice of absolute adoration.
Jack hummed, "Uh huh." He sighed himself, content before he let out a quiet chuckle, "He's going to be such a heartbreaker when he grows up!"
Sam let out a laugh of her own, looking up at her husband. She stared into his face, her soft smile and beautiful eyes telling him all he needed to know. After a second, she murmured, "I'm so glad I'm alive," she glanced back down at the baby and then at the children playing on the lawn, "I can't believe that I might have missed this."
Jack nodded, "Me neither."
She smiled again and placed a kiss on his lips softly. She pulled back and took his hand in hers as she moved to the rug in the dappled shade. Jack helped her to lower herself to sit on the picnic mat as he joined her; the both of them watching their children, fingers entwined as the summer's day slowly came to an end.
~~~FINIS~~~
Yet more Author's notes: It's FINISHED!!! YAY! I know it's been ages and ages since I last posted something, but I'm having trouble at the moment due to school, getting a lead role in my drama group pantomime, my mum just returning from hospital etc etc. Please send me some feedback. Vulnerability and Finding Strength are two of my favourite stories and I'd like to hear what you guys thought of them. Thanks again everyone and I PROMISE I will finish SOMETHING soon! Sam x
Copyright (C) Sam I Am 2005
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