Gamblin' Man
Gamblin' Man
by Deb
TITLE: Gamblin' Man
AUTHOR: Deb
EMAIL: dvp@flash.net
CATEGORY: Sam and Jack, humor, UST
SPOILERS:
SEASON / SEQUEL:
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS: Some language
SUMMARY: Jack loses Sam to Makepeace in a poker game (...oops)
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
AUTHOR'S NOTES:
"Hey, thanks again for including me in your poker night," a rather smug Col. Makepeace stated, "and I'm not just saying that because I've won all your money tonight."
"Nights not over yet," replied Jack.
Col. Makepeace, Jack, Teal'c and Daniel were sitting around Jack's house playing poker. Usually Sam Carter joined them for this weekly ritual, but had gotten stuck back in the lab. Not wanting to cancel, Jack had *begrudgingly* asked Makepeace to join them. So here they were.
"I fold." Daniel sighed. "As do I" included Teal'c.
"Again?!? Well, Jack, I guess it's down to you and me."
Jack looked at his hand. It took all his concentration not to let a goofy grin cross his face. 'yep, and this hand I am going to win' "I'll see your twenty...and raise you ... fifty." Makepeace checked over his own cards and thought 'he's bluffing. Hell even if he isn't, I'll still beat him.' "making this interesting, huh? I'll see your fifty and raise you..." he couldn't help but smile "...two hundred more dollars"
Oh no. Daniel did NOT like where this was heading. He knew how incredibly competitive Makepeace and Jack were. "Colonel O'Neill does not have two hundred more dollars" said Teal'c, stating the obvious.
Jack shot Teal'c a 'gee thanks for pointing that out' kind of look (which Teal'c did not appreciate) while Makepeace, giving a rather annoying victory sign taunted "guess I win...again".
Jack, knowing he would be winning this hand stopped the victory celebration. "Wait. Not so fast. Daniel Teal'c ... what have you got left?"
"Nothing...I'm broke" "As am I" said Teal'c, still a little put off by Jack.
"Oh For cryin' out loud, Teal'c, you have seventy dollars sitting right in front of you!" "Yes"
Pause. Jack just sits there staring at the Jaffa waiting for him to get the hint. It is quickly becoming obvious to Jack that Teal'c already got the hint, but was not about to help his friend out. 'Maybe I shouldn't have insulted him.'
"Fine Teal'c, whatever, thanks" "You are welcome."
Makepeace, irritated at the delay of retrieving his earnings, and yet, was quite happy watching O'Neill squirm and beg and grovel "like I said...guess I win ... again."
Jack, desperate by now, 'I know I've got this hand won', thinks for a way to stay in the game "wait, what about something else? Besides money."
Intrigued, Makepeace asks "Like your hockey stick"
Jack's plan comes to a screeching halt. "Uh, never mind... I fold..."
"Now hold on... let me think... what do I need? what do I need?" 'That will drive him crazy when he has to give it to me' "I know... loan me one of you team-mates."
Daniel and Teal'c, who had, up until this point, lost interest in the banter, suddenly looked up at Jack...worried. They knew Jack respected his team and would do anything to keep them happy...but...they also knew that Jack has an unhealthy competitive spirit when it comes to Makepeace.
"You have GOT to be kidding. You have a better chance at getting my hockey stick...I think."
Relief. That is all Daniel could think.
"And I repeat...for the fourth time, I think, ...guess I win."
Jack couldn't take the taunting anymore. He was NOT about to lose all his money at poker, especially not to a stupid marine, especially when he knew he would win this hand. "Daniel you wouldn't mind would y..." Daniel didn't have time to react. "What does a team full of marines need with an psychologist?" "Anthropologist!" "Whatever, Danny"
Realizing that it would be stupid for Daniel to get mixed up with SG-3 (he couldn't do that to the guy), "OK, Teal'c?" "I would enjoy that very much" Jack was rather shocked. After insulting him enough to not loan Jack his money, he was willing to do this, "really?"
"...not"
Daniel, remembering the video that he and Teal'c watched earlier in the day, laughed "Party on Teal'c" "Party on Dan"
Makepeace and O'Neill just sat there in stunned silence. It is somewhat unnerving to see Teal'c act like...well...anyway except like a Jaffa.
"Let me guess... you rented Wayne's World?" "Besides what does a team full of marines need with a Jaffa?" asked Makepeace.
Jack was getting irritated with the rather picky Marine. "Well, he IS a warrior and ...oh I get it. I understand. You're afraid he'll make you and your marines look bad in front of...the whole galaxy"
Makepeace was not happy with that comment. He will pay for that. "How about Carter." He pauses. "Sure she's a good soldier..." "A damn fine soldier."
Then, with the most sinister smile he could muster "...but what would a team full of marines need with a woman?"
Yep. That struck a nerve.
"What the hell are you thinking? I outta beat the crap out of ..." "So you're folding?"
Showdown time. Jack just stares at Makepeace. He couldn't possibly be thinking *impure thoughts* about Sam. 'My Sam. I'm the only one allowed to have impure thoughts about her.' Not that it mattered what Makepeace's intentions were. He wasn't going to win this hand. Jack will get all of his money back, as well as some of Makepeace's money, and Sam will be none the smarter. But what if...
"Oh don't worry O'Neill. SG-3 will be gentlemen. All four of us..." 'let the torturing begin' "...big strong marines. We'll all be PERFECT gentlemen." Smiling again, Makepeace thinks to himself that maybe all the rumors about O'Neill and Carter were in fact true. That would definitely explain the other man's anger.
Jack is suddenly struck by something. 'I never noticed how much Makepeace's smile looks like Martouf's'. Makepeace notices Jack's hesitation and gives him a questioning, and yes, taunting, look. That's all Jack can take. Daniel notices and points out to Jack that this isn't a good idea.
"Don't worry Danny...it's not like I'm going to lose. I wouldn't bet Carter on a bluff... OK, Makepeace. I see your two hundred (with Carter). Call." Jack smiles to him self, preparing for victory. "Straight flush...tens high. What do ya got?"
Makepeace sits there for a second. "What do ya know. You weren't bluffing. You did have a good hand." As Jack starts to retrieve his winnings and gives Daniel and Teal'c a 'I knew what I was doing' look, Makepeace interrupts him. "But it wasn't good enough. Straight flush... KINGS high."
Uh oh.
"O'Neill, when are going to inform Major Carter of this?" "Why, Teal'c?" "I do not wish to be on this planet when you do."
* * * * * * * (next day)
Oh boy. Jack walks down one of the corridors in the SGC and sees Carter. A knot starts to form in his stomach when she looks up at him with those beautiful blue eyes of hers. "Hey Colonel. Sorry I didn't make it last night...got stuck in the lab. So how much did Makepeace take you for?"
"More than I care to mention." The sickening knot in his stomach grows when she flashes a smile at him, laughing. "Will you ever learn?"
'Yes. I think I finally did last night, but by then it was too late' he thinks to himself. I might as well get this over with. Maybe she won't even get that mad. Maybe she'll think its kind of funny in an ancient-civilization-women-are-just-property kind of way. "Um, Carter, are you busy at the moment? " "No...why?" still laughing "Do you need me to buy your lunch?" "There's something I need to tell you. And I'm afraid you are going to get really, REALLY pissed when I..."
Unfortunately, Jack is interrupted by Colonel Makepeace walking towards them. "There's my earnings!" he shouts as he gives Sam a big hug
Sam is obviously confused. "What?" Jack just stands there mortified. 'oh no, oh no, not yet. I haven't told her yet.' "Jack lost you to me in poker last night." "EXCUSE me. Colonel I hope to hell that this is what you were about to tell me because..."
This whole situation is getting better by the minute Makepeace thinks to himself as he feigns innocence "Oh, you hadn't told her yet? I'm so sorry, Jack" and walks off, laughing.
Sam continues her tirade "...because if there is something else..." 'that's going to piss me off' "...I recommend you just wait for some other time to tell me. No, on second thought, don't tell me. Don't tell me...anything...ever again!".
She storms off, leaving Jack devastated. He knew that she would be unhappy with this, but figured she would see some *humor* in the whole thing. 'I have got to make this right. What on earth was I thinking?' Running after her he yells "Wait. Carter, let me explain. Sam!"
Since Colonel O'Neill seems to have lost touch with reality, Major Carter decided to try to talk some sense into Colonel Makepeace. And if that doesn't work, maybe she'll just beat the crap out of him. Or try both. She still hadn't decided on which one when she got to Makepeace's quarters. He let her into his quarters and she immediately starts ranting. All the while she is pacing the floor, like a caged tiger.
"Now calm down Major. I'm not going to do anything with you or to you. I only did this to irritate Jack. I knew it would drive him crazy since he's hot for you."
Sam stops pacing in mid-step. "What?" 'What was Makepeace's angle on this.' She looked at him curiously.
"You're kidding, right? You honestly didn't know? I'm just a stupid marine and I figured it out."
She still didn't believe him. "Then why on earth would he have *wagered* me?"
"Simple. He had a straight flush. He thought he'd win. To tell you the truth, he usually would have, except I had a straight flush too, but my high card beat his. So he lost. My only regret is that I didn't have a camera to get a picture of the look on his face." Makepeace laughs out loud remembering the previous night's events. "So you see, I really didn't want YOU...ah, no offense...I just wanted to put Jack through hell on earth, and thus reaffirm the fact that he should NOT even try to compete with me."
Carter was trying to soak everything in. 'Ok, Jack's interested...Makepeace isn't...and the stupid marine is an arrogant...'
Her thoughts were interrupted. "I can tell you still doubt what I'm saying." She nods in agreement. "OK. I think I know a way to prove to you that what I'm about him saying is true AND you can get back at him."
"Two birds with one stone?" Now things are getting interesting.
"Yep. Here's what I'm thinking." He begins to tell her in a hushed voice.
* * * *
Jack is to the point of desperation. He has checked her lab, Janet's office, Daniel's lab, Hammond's office (it was kind of a relief that she wasn't there filing a report), the mess hall... 'She's obviously avoiding you.' "Ya think?" he said out loud. Where else could she be? 'Unless...no...oh please let her be Ok.' He thought to himself as he sprinted towards Makepeace's quarters.
He gets there and immediately starts pounding on the door. "Makepeace? It's O'Neill. I need to talk to you. Open up. You can't have Sam. Makepeace, are you in there? You can have my autographed hockey stick. The one you asked for first. Makepeace?"
* * * *
Inside his quarters, Makepeace looked at Sam, grinning. "He sounds pretty jealous" he whispered to Sam. "Are you ready for Operation Put Jack In His Place?" She nods in agreement.
* * * *
Makepeace clears his throat and begins to speak...loudly. "OK...Sam. After you finish typing up all of SG-3's reports..."
Jack listens through the door. 'Huh? Oh good. He's only having her do SGC stuff,' he thinks to himself relieved.
"...you then need to go to my home. I expect the house to be clean and have dinner on the table. The rest of SG-3 are coming over." 'Hmm, maybe I shouldn't go that man-is-the-master route. I don't want her killing me while I torture O'Neill.' "Anything else, sir?" 'good she's playing along.' "Uh, yeah. You can only wear a black lace neglege...you know, with a garter belt and 4 inch stilleto heels." Sam is struggling to not laugh out loud. "Is there a problem? You can't refuse. I won you fair and square." Gaining control, Sam replies "I know sir...I'll be there." 'Man I wish I could see the Colonel's face right now.
If she could, she would see a man fluctuating between worry, guilt, rage, a little more worry... He starts banging on the door. "Makepeace open this damn door right now!"
"Is there something I can help you with, O'Neill?" Makepeace shouts through the door. "Cause I'm kinda busy...mentally undressing my winnings." Sam play slaps Makepeace's face and shakes her finger at him.
"I am going to break this door..."
Sam and Makepeace wait for O'Neill to finish the statement...or for the door to come shattering apart. But nothing. "You think it's a trap?" Makepeace asks Sam. "I have no idea." They slowly open the door to find...an empty corridor.
"What the...? Where did he go?"
"I don't know Colonel, but I think you should take this opportunity to get out of here. I've never heard the colonel so...exasperated. I mean I've heard worse tirades from him, but his voice...this time...was so..."
"different. Like someone is worried sick about someone they really, REALLY care about?" He doesn't wait for a response. He just leaves to go home.
* * * *
"You needed to see me General?" Jack asked as he walked in Hammond's office.
"Yes Colonel. Something has come up and Doctor Jackson needs to go to Nellis AFB."
Jack just stares at the General, waiting to see what this has to do with him. Sensing this, Hammond continues. "I am uneasy with sending Jackson alone, and I don't trust Maybourne with Teal'c, so you need to escort him there and back."
"What time do we leave in the morning?"
"You don't. You're leaving now." Hammond takes in the worried look on the colonel's face. "Is there a problem?"
'Oh sure. I kinda lost my second in command to Colonel Makepeace and he plans to watch her prance almost naked around his home.' Jack thinks, but realizes he can't exactly say that. "Uh, no sir. I'll check back in when we return." And he leaves upon being dismissed.
Well what is he going to do now? He doesn't have time to consider a plan of action before Daniel walks up to him. "Ready to go?"
"Sure. What do you need at Nellis?" "Oh. SG-9 brought back an artifact that needs immediate translation. Don't ask me why." Daniel stands there waiting for O'Neill to ask 'why', but he doesn't. "Jack, are you OK? I guess you told Sam and she's quite angry, huh?"
"Yes, she knows and yes she's angry." Jack stops the conversation as they prepare to sign out from the base.
"Good evening, sir" salutes the airman. "Has Major Carter or Colonel Makepeace left yet?"
Checking the sign out sheet, the airman responds "Yes, they both signed out about ten minutes ago."
Jack's whole body sags a bit. 'Sam I am so sorry!' "Thank you, airman." Jack waits for Daniel to sign out and then they head out to Nellis.
"Do you want to let me in on all that?" Daniel asks his friend. Jack proceeds to explain the whole lousy mess to the anthropologist. "You don't think that Makepeace would actually DO anything, do you? I mean, he may not be her CO, but I'm sure that it would be against some regulation..."
"So is wagering person during a game of poker! And now, instead of getting Sam out of harms way, I have to baby-sit you." The two just sit in silence for a few minutes. "Oh for cryin' out loud Daniel. I'm sorry. I shouldn't take it out on you. This is my own damned fault." Jack stares at a smiling Daniel.
"Is it that strange for me to apologize?" Jack asks sarcastically.
"Huh, no...I mean, yes...I mean that's not what I'm smiling about."
"I'll bite. What are you smiling about? The way I seem to screw everything up"
"Nope. More like the way you're responding to it. Did you realize you referred to Sam as 'Sam'?"
"So. You call her that all the time."
"True, but I'm not in the military, I'm not her CO and...I'm not in love with her." Jack just nods in agreement. Then he realizes what Daniel just said.
"I am NOT in love with her"
"OK Jack, whatever. I believe you."
"I'm not." "Hey Jack, I said I believe you."
"Oh just be quiet for the rest of this trip"
* * * *
Upon his return from Nellis, Jack is running through the SGC looking for Sam. Worried that she may be 'trapped' at Makepeace's home, he is relieved to find her in her lab. Sighing he approaches her.
"Sam?" he asks, his voice almost a whisper. But before she can answer, he continues. "I am SO sorry. He didn't hurt you did he? Because I will kill him if he did. I don't care if I go to jail. I am just so sorry. I shouldn't have treated you like an object. It was wrong. Will you ever forgive me? How can I make it up to you? Please, just tell me."
'Damn' Sam thought to herself. 'I guess Makepeace was right about Jack. Now I owe the stupid marine fifty dollars.' She smiles to herself 'I guess none of SG-1 needs to be betting against Makepeace.' But now for the matter at hand. She cannot let Jack off that easily.
"Colonel O'Neill." She begins "I don't know where you got the idea that I was not only property..." Jack starts to interrupt her, but she stops him. "...but that I was YOUR property. And yes you are going to make it up to me. You are going to wish you were never born." The hurt look on Jacks face makes her think she maybe went a little too far with that last comment, but he just lowers his head and nods in agreement.
* * * *
Again the weekly poker ritual is in full swing this time at Samantha Carter's place. And this week all of SG-1 is there. Jack is a little nervous because Sam has yet to figure out how he is to make it up to her.
"OK who's in?" Daniel asks.
"I am. Give me three." Jack says and looks at his cards. "Dammit. I fold"
"Teal'c?"
"I stand"
Surprised, Daniel states "Wow, no cards. Does anyone know if Jaffa are capable of bluffing?"
"Well he has one hell of a poker face. I need two." Sam replied.
Teal'c, Sam and Daniel go into a wagering frenzy. Finally Teal'c who has had enough states "I see your twenty dollars, but I have no cash. How about... one Jack O'Neill?"
What?!?! That got Jack's attention.
"OK, but I'll raise you another twenty" Sam was in this to win.
"I fold." Grumbles Daniel.
"Me too." Adds Teal'c.
"Guess I win. Let me see." Counting her winnings "Seventy-five dollars and one Jack O'Neill. Sweet!"
"What do you have Major Carter?" the Jaffa asks.
"I don't have to show you. You folded. Ok, fine. Just a pair of tens."
"Wait a second. She won me on a pair of tens?"
"Don't forget the seventy-five dollars" Sam chimed in.
"What did you guys have that made you want to fold? A pair of threes?" Jack asks.
"Well I had three Aces" Daniel says as he shows the colonel his cards.
"And I had a straight."
They all start laughing as Jack realizes he has been set up. They had played for three hours, all the while his team had been scheming to set him up. Damn them.
"Well I guess Teal'c and I should be getting back to the base. We'd stay and help you clean up, Sam, but..."
"Oh, don't worry. I have all the help I need." She replies patting Jack on the back. She is going to enjoy this.
Daniel and Jack leave. Sam then turns to Jack with a big, mischievous smile on her face. "OK Jack. First, clean up this mess. Then after you're done, come up to my bedroom." She glances over her shoulder as she leaves the room. "Get ready for your punishment."
The only thing Jack can think is 'is that punishment in a good way or a bad way' There's only one way to find out. He quickly cleans up and heads off for his punishment.
If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Deb
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