That Other Colonel
The Other Colonel
by Deb
TITLE: The Other Colonel
AUTHOR: Deb
EMAIL: dvp@flash.net
CATEGORY: Sam and Jack
SPOILERS: Shades of grey
SEASON / SEQUEL: Season 3
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS:
SUMMARY: Sam is hurting after the incidents of the last day or two.
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. We have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the authors. Not to be archived without permission of the authors.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: I haven't seen this ep. I'm only going by the spoilers I've read. This is just a short fic.
Well at least whoever was knocking at her door finally gave up.
"Sam?" Or not.
Samantha Carter looked out her sliding-glass door to see a figure peering over the fence of her patio. The sun behind him made it difficult to see his feature's but she knew who it was. She watched her CO jump the fence and walk towards the open door.
She had been laying on her living room floor for the better part of the day now and had been hoping to avoid everyone. She had managed to fend off attempts by Daniel and Teal'c, and later Janet and Cassie. She knew her friends meant well, but she just wasn't ready to talk about the last few days. It didn't look like she'd be able to avoid it any longer.
"Sam?" Jack called into her apartment. "Are you home?"
"Down here." she answered him weakly.
Jack had been trying to peer through her apartment when she answered him. His gaze turned towards her voice to see one Samantha Carter, mussed up hair, old sweats, swollen eyes laying on her side, her head propped up on her hand, and lots and lots of wadded up Kleenex. His heart sank. She didn't look up at him...she was too busy staring at some nonexistent object in the distance.
"Daniel told me." He calmly said.
She winced at this. She had kept her short-lived relationship with Colonel Makepeace a secret from Jack. Not that she had been trying to hide anything, she just hadn't been in a sharing sort of mood. She finally looked up at him. He was still standing in the doorway to the patio and was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. He looked very...civilian.
He moved towards her and cautiously laid down next to her on the floor. He took the same position as Sam...head propped up, laying on his side. "So how are you doing?" he asked her gently.
Sam just looked at the floor. She was so confused and hurt.
"Hey," he said as he reached out to rub her shoulder. "You can talk to me, you know that."
She nodded and some tears dropped from her eyes. They stayed like that for a long time, the only variety being her intermittent crying. Jack continued to rub her shoulder softly.
"I thought he cared about me."
"I'm sure he did." Jack was doing his best to make her feel better. Watching the guy you were seeing arrested for treason can really make you doubt everything about him. "Just because he turned out to be a bad soldier doesn't mean he wasn't sincere..."
"NO!" She yelled as she rolled onto her stomach, burying her face in her hands. Jack sat up and crossed his legs, then began rubbing her back. She eventually quieted down and turned back on her side to face her friend. "You don't understand. Robert had never paid any attention to anything I did. Then you got trapped on Edora and I started working on that particle accelerator. When it was close to being finished, he started coming around acting interested in my little project, asking questions wanting me to explain everything." A small smile crept on her face. "He kinda reminded me of you." Jack had to smile at that.
"So that's when you two started..."
"No. I had too much on my mind. I had my CO to save." She smiled again. "After you were rescued and..." her smile faded, "well, I just felt distanced from you. I didn't feel comfortable being around my best friend. And Robert was there."
Jack now looked at the floor. He nodded like he understood, but what he was really thinking was 'I drove her to him, and he ended up hurting her.'
"Sir, what's wrong with me?" She had the most serious and most saddest blue eyes he had ever seen.
"Sam, there's nothing wrong with you." He said taking her hand in his.
"Then why am I only good enough for lunatics and traitors?"
Jack could see the desperation in her face. He tried to lighten her mood. "Lt. Simmons isn't a lunatic or traitor." Damn...not even a smile.
"I'm serious sir. Most men are threatened by my intelligence, and I'm not about to change that about me, or they just want some sort of fling. If they do show some honest-to-god interest, it's only because they plan on just using me."
"I doubt Makepeace was using you."
"How can you be so sure? I didn't think anything of it at the time, but looking back, he just asked some really strange questions. He wanted to know about any memories from Jolinar, like weapons she had used, places she had gone and what she had seen there. He also wanted to know everything about what SG-1 had seen." She looked ragged. "I thought he was just interested in what happened. He was just using me."
"Come on Sam," he said as he pulled her into a hug, " don't think that." He was saying that to comfort her, but he wasn't believing what he was saying. That bastard, in all likelihood, had been using her for information.
"I'm so stupid."
"OK, now you're being ridiculous. There is no way you could ever be stupid." He said trying to cheer her up.
"I'm not talking physics, sir. I'm talking about men."
'Well, she's right about that.' Jack thought to himself. 'She hasn't noticed how love-sick I've been over her for the past three years...'
"I hate myself."
"Well I don't hate you."
"You don't?"
Jack's jaw dropped to the ground. "How could you think I hated you. I care about you a lot. I've been worried sick about you since Daniel told me about you and Makepeace." He was telling the truth about this. Daniel had mentioned to Jack about Makepeace's arrest was going to be hard on Sam. Of course then Jack made him explain why. After getting over that initial the-woman-I-love-was-seeing-someone-else shock, he had immediately began to worry about her. She may act tough, hell she may even be tough. But when it came to affairs of the heart, he knew she was fragile. That's why he had never pursued anything with her. (Well, it was *one* of the reasons.) He was afraid he'd end up hurting her fragile heart.
"Really, Jack?"
"Yes." he said as he kissed her forehead. "I care a lot." and her cheek. "Too much." and her lips. It was a sweet and (almost) completely innocent kiss.
She looked up at him after he pulled away. She looked, what? shocked? angry? confused? Jack couldn't tell. All he knew is that he was supposed to be her friend, and he had let his hormones take over. "Oh for cryin' out loud." he mumbled. "I'm so sorry Sam. I shouldn't have taken advantage of your vulnerability." and with that he stood up. "I should leave. I'm sorry."
"Jack please don't go." She had now stood up as well.
"Sam, if I stay, I'm going to..." he thought for a moment, "...end up doing something that will make *both* of us hate me. I hate seeing you so upset and I'm not very good at this and it's just that I want to make you feel better, but I know..."
"You do make me feel better...even when you're rambling." She had a smile on her face. An honest, sincere smile. "Please stay a while."
He couldn't turn her down. "OK." And he gave her another hug. "Do you wanna get something to eat?"
"Not right now. I'm not hungry yet." Jack nodded his head as he kept her in his embrace. "Jack?"
"Yeah."
"I just wanted to let you know," she paused, "that I'm not upset so much about the end my thing with Makepeace, but more about being used."
He thought about that for a moment and asked "Why did you want me to know that?"
She looked up at him, "I just didn't want you to think that it had gotten real serious or anything." She then buried her face in his chest again.
"Well, that's your private life and its none of my business." Jack tried to sound convincing and he wasn't sure if he succeeded.
"I thought you cared?"
"I do, but it's none of my busi..."
"So you wouldn't care if I had slept with him?"
Jack just froze. "Uh," he swallowed hard, "no." Clearing his throat, "Like I said, your private life, none of my business." He felt himself sag a little at the thought of Sam and Makepeace together.
"Jack?"
"Yes?"
"We never slept together and...You really don't lie very well."
"I know." He said as he leaned down to kiss her once more. He clasped her face in his hands and tenderly kissed her, a long, slow kiss. He was relieved that she hadn't been with Makepeace, but the image in his mind was there. He continued to kiss her. He had to make himself forget the image of her with that *other* colonel.
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