More Secrets
More Secrets
by AliCat
TITLE: More Secrets
AUTHOR:AliCat
EMAIL: princess_alicat@yahoo.com
CATEGORY: Romance, Missing scene(s), Angst
SPOILERS: "Secrets"
SEASON / SEQUEL: Sequel to "Metamorphosis"
RATING: PG-13
CONTENT WARNINGS: Daniel angst!
SUMMARY: Daniel helps Sha're give birth and remembers their lives together on Abydos.
ARCHIVE: Yes for Heliopolis
DISCLAIMER: I don't own them, I'm just borrowing them for a while. I'm making no money with this, nor do I want to. Thanks to the producers and creators of the show and characters for letting me play.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Sequel to my story Metamorphosis (archived at Heliopolis in the adult section) and set during Secrets (with flashbacks to when Daniel was still on Abydos). I wrote Metamorphosis before I saw Secrets, and this story ties them together. There are some inconsistencies, but that's to be expected. ^_^ You'll probably be very confused with this story if you haven't read Metamorphosis first. ^_^ And yes, they did have birth control in ancient Egypt. You really don't want to know what it was!
The contractions were coming faster now. Sha're cried out as another one overwhelmed her and she clung to Daniel's numb hand, squeezing her eyes shut. The scientist touched her hot forehead with the wet cloth again, wiping away the sweat. He hated seeing her in pain. At least Teal'c was gone and he could ask her what had been on his mind.
"Sha're," he said gently when her body sagged against him. The contraction was over, for now.
"Yes, my husband?" she said, breathing heavily.
"Is it my child?" Daniel whispered.
"Yes," sobbed Sha're, finally breaking into tears. "I thought it was a dream."
"When I finally found you again after so long?" asked Daniel, choking up. "When they were going to execute you?"
"And when I . . . tried to kill you," she said, hating herself as she spoke the words.
"Oh, Sha're," Daniel said, touching her face tenderly, "That wasn't you, you weren't in control. It was Amaunet!"
"I still feel as though I could have stopped her," she said, tears running freely down her face. "I did not know until today that you had survived! There were rumours, but I wasn't sure. I do not know what I would have done if you had died."
"Well, we're together now, and that's all that matters," murmured Daniel. "We tried to go to Chulak after you left, but there were too many soldiers. The MALP was completely destroyed."
"There are times I am glad Apophis is a fool," said Sha're. "He is so unused to strategy and planning. All he knows is conquest by force."
"Yeah, it wasn't exactly subtle," Daniel said, smiling.
Another contraction started and Daniel held his wife as she endured it. They were finally going to be a real family. It hadn't turned out as he'd planned, but his life never worked that way. Daniel hoped with all of his heart that when they got Sha're back to the SGC, they'd be able to get the worm out of her head without killing her. He was determined to save her this time.
"Your father will be pleased," murmured Daniel as the contraction subsided.
"As am I, my husband. I am very sorry that you do not want the child," she whispered.
"Oh, my love, I do!" Daniel said earnestly. "I want it more than anything. I want us to be a family."
"You do?" asked Sha're, confused. "When we were first married, you refused to give me a child!"
"I know, and I'm so sorry," said Daniel. "When they took you away from me, I realised just how much I wanted a child. I realised too late, and I made you suffer for it!" Daniel clenched his jaw in anger. "I was afraid of being a father though. I didn't think I was ready."
The arguments had started almost immediately. While Daniel and Sha're were happily married in most respects, they could not agree on children. Sha're wanted to have as many children as she could. Her culture expected it, and she'd grown up wanting it. She couldn't understand why Daniel wanted to "wait until he was ready". What was there to get ready for?
Kasuf had thought that somehow Daniel was disgusted with his daughter, or didn't think her worthy of carrying his child. He'd never said it, but Daniel knew. Whenever a child was born in the city, Kasuf, as the leader, was informed. He would speak with joy in his voice, but sorrow in his eyes. Even Skaara subconsciously dropped hints of his confusion.
Only Sha're's natural obedience to men had kept her using birth control, after Daniel's insistence. She wanted only to please her husband, so she used it even though she didn't want to. It pained Daniel greatly to disappoint her like this, and to exert the control he'd hated to see other men use over his wife. He loved her so much, and respected her completely. There was just no way he could agree to having a baby right now.
He guessed that some of his trepidation came from the fact that he'd lost his own parents so young. He'd never really had a family, and he'd always been a loner. The crowded, busy streets of Abydos were wonderful, but so different. If he'd been able to admit it to himself, he would have known that he was experiencing culture shock.
Just a week before the Stargate opened again and Jack and the SGC had come back into his life, things had exploded. They had been eating dinner, quietly discussing the day's events when the subject of children had come up as it seemed to do more and more frequently. Daniel tried to calm himself, but before he knew it, he and Sha're were screaming at each other again.
"You do not need to be ready for it Daniel!" she shouted. "You are not the one *giving birth*!"
"I just need more time, all right? It's just too soon for me!" he yelled back.
"When will it not be too soon? Will I be old and have white hair? Will I have wrinkles? Will I need a nursing woman because my breasts have shrivelled up to nothing?" she screamed.
She turned on her heel, sick of fighting with the man she loved, and ran out of the house. Daniel yelled after her, knowing it would be useless but trying anyway. Throwing down his food, he stood up, wiped the grease from around his mouth and followed her. He could see her running down the street, towards the city gates.
He jogged along the streets, familiar by now, and caught up with her outside the city walls. She was headed for her "thinking spot" - it was a grassy hill next to the nearby river. The people of Abydos, like the people of Egypt, only built their cities on land that wouldn't grow crops. The river wasn't far, but it was still a fairly lengthily walk. Everyone bathed there and got their water there.
"Sha're, please wait," he said, pleased that he wasn't winded from the run. He was actually in shape from the hard work of living here.
"Why should I?" she demanded, not looking at him as she kept walking.
"Because I love you," said Daniel, trying to hold her back. She shook off his hand and walked faster.
"I love you, my Daniel, but I am no longer sure that you love me," she said, trying to mask the pain in her voice.
"Of course I love you!" he exclaimed. "We don't need a baby to prove that!"
"You may not, but I would like to see a new person created because of our love," she said, turning her beautiful eyes on him. His heart twisted. "All of my friends have babies. Most of them have several! Daniel, it might be normal for you to wait, but no here! My father might demand that you give me up so I may marry another. A man willing to give me children!"
Daniel winced as if she'd struck him. It was true, Kasuf did have that right. He didn't want to be forced into this! It was the biggest decision he'd ever have to make, and the last thing he wanted to do was to make it under duress. He'd stopped walking in shock, so he ran to catch up with Sha're again.
"Sha're," he said, voice breaking from emotion, "you don't want to marry someone else, do you?"
She stopped walking and turned to him, finally. He froze, heart beating rapidly as he watched her slowly look into his eyes. She was crying and she blinked to clear her vision.
"I don't know what else to do," she finally whispered, and turned and ran.
Daniel didn't follow her. He couldn't move. His heart felt like it was torn out and the farther Sha're's dainty figure got from him, the more numb he felt. This couldn't be happening. He'd thought they'd always be together, always be happy. It *had* been too good to be true then. He'd known his happiness couldn't last forever. With a heavy heart, he followed his wife, determined to see this through.
He found her on her little hill, knees pulled up, arms around them, and head buried in the fabric of her robes. Her slender form was shaking with silent sobs. Daniel felt tears spring to his eyes as he approached her and he gulped for air, trying to calm himself. He came up beside her and sat down.
"Look, I know we're not getting along right now," Daniel started, "but I don't want to throw away what we have. I love you so much, and I want to make you happy."
"Then give me what I ask. Is it really so difficult?" Sha're said, wiping her eyes with the heel of her hand and sniffing.
"I - I don't know," he said, unwilling to lie to her. "We'll work it out, ok?"
"But in the end, you still won't give me a child," she said miserably.
Could he do it? Was he ready? Did it, in the end, really matter that much? He had all of Sha're's enormous family to help him if he needed it. It wasn't like there was really a way to get fully prepared for such a life-altering decision. He took a deep breath.
"Let's do it," he said, before he could change his mind.
"Do you mean it?" Sha're asked, unable to believe her ears.
"Absolutely," said Daniel, smiling at her. He turned her head so he could look her in the eyes, letting her see he was being sincere.
"Oh Daniel!" she exclaimed, hugging him fiercely.
"Anything for you, my love," he whispered as he caressed her.
"Let's go tell father!" she exclaimed and jumped up, pulling him with her.
They jogged, laughing, hand in hand, back towards the city. Sha're couldn't stop smiling and Daniel was grinning from ear to ear. He was still nervous, but he knew he'd made the right decision. He took her by the waist and spun her around, laughing with joy.
"This is wonderful!" she said, kissing him on the nose.
Lighting above them made them look up. They hadn't even noticed the storm clouds gathering. The thunder made them jump and Sha're squealed with surprise. Then the rain started. Within seconds, the downpour had soaked them, making their clothes turn transparent and stick to their bodies and
their hair lay flat.
"THIS is wonderful!" shouted Daniel over the thunder, holding his hands up to the sky. "YOU are wonderful!"
She laughed in delight, spinning in circles and raising her arms. He grinned at her and kissed her, pulling her close to him. They stood there for a long time, not caring that the rain was still coming down. It was too late to run for cover, anyway. The water ran in rivulets down their bodies as they held each other, savouring the moment.
Sha're cried out as her stomach clenched again, contracting to push out the baby. Daniel murmured to her comfortingly. She didn't want to give birth or Amaunet would take over again. She had to do this. It was so strange - him encouraging her like this. Sha're gasped as she pushed, bearing down with all her strength.
The baby's head was starting to come out and he grinned, seeing his child for the first time. Sha're went limp, relaxing between contractions, then all too soon she had to push again. Daniel encouraged her; it was the only thing he could do. It would be all right, he knew it. He wouldn't have to worry about his child any more, and he would finally have his family.
"It's a boy!" he exclaimed as the baby came out all the way. Suddenly, fear washed over him as the situation overwhelmed him. "It's a boy," he repeated, dread filling him.
Sha're's eyes glowed and his fears were confirmed. He'd known this would happen, but he'd hoped that somehow it wouldn't. He felt like screaming when Teal'c arrived and shot his wife with the zat gun. His heart twisted as she convulsed with the electric charge, and he prayed that she'd never had the misfortune to be hit by a zat gun before. He couldn't loose her again, but it was happening anyway.
The only thing that made giving up his son tolerable was knowing that Sha're hadn't let the Goa'uld alert Apophis to the team's presence. He knew he couldn't keep the child, partly because everyone thought it wasn't his and partly because he couldn't look after the baby on his own. He was on missions far too often to do it. Kasuf would do a fine job of looking after his son until he could return, with Sha're, to make their family complete.
He repeated it to himself, hoping he'd made the right decision. His determination to find Sha're was renewed once more and he knew he'd search the entire galaxy if he had to. He WOULD find her.
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