Chapter 40
Mess Tent, Earth Pavilion, Diplomatic Encampment, Alaris
Day Nine of the Confederation Deliberative Assembly
Daniel and Janet were engrossed in a conversation over their lunch in Earth’s mess tent while the representatives broke for the mid-day meal, discussing a common topic of conversation between them—Jack. Particularly how watching Jack mediating the assembly since day one had demonstrated how much he had changed since he had served as SG-1’s leader.
A shadow fell over Janet and Daniel looked up in irritation at the intrusion on a private conversation. His irritated look turned into one of surprise when he saw who was standing behind Janet in AF BDU, holding a lunch tray, and otherwise trying to inconspicuously look like any other Earth soldier.
“Mind if I join you docs?” Jack questioned.
Janet craned her neck around to look at her commander and gestured with her left had to the open seat beside her. “Not at all Sir.”
“Thank you,” Jack replied obligingly as he took the offered seat on the bench and, ignoring Daniel’s surprised look, dug into the food on his tray with enthusiasm. The reason for his enthusiasm was obvious as beside a cup of coffee, his ‘meal’ consisted of nothing but a whole pie.
“Sir, that better not be all you’re eating for lunch,” Janet said disapprovingly in a clearly doctoral voice.
Jack shook his head and after swallowing a piece of pie answered, “Nah, I already ate onboard the ship. But no one makes apple pie like Palmer does.”
Daniel was so wrapped up in his surprise at Jack’s appearance and asking to join them, that it took him a moment to place the name and information. He now remembered there used to be a Palmer in the SGC kitchens—Jack had raved about Palmer and apple pie before—and he could only surmise that the man was still cooking for the AF and was on Alaris none the less.
“So, what were you two talking about?” Jack questioned.
“You, actually,” Daniel responded honestly.
Jack made a face. “Why me? I’m boring. Couldn’t you talk about something interesting?”
Daniel muffled a snort of laughter in his mug and Janet controlled her own impulse to roll her eyes at the tent roof. That was just such a Jack thing to say. But the spurt of amusement faded for Daniel as he thought about how he still thought Jack was the Jack of ten years ago when many, many things had shown him that Jack was no longer the same.
Watching Jack mediate the assembly had driven that point home clearly to him. It had also shown just how ham-handed his attempt to get himself in the position of Jack’s diplomat—which he’d filled for years on SG-1—on the first day of the assembly had been. He had not thought about how those ten years had changed them, changed Jack really. Who had been involved first with the Asgärd’s war with the replicators, and then his own war with the Confederation. Constantly fighting and negotiating with alien races had Jack developing his own diplomatic skills that he had not needed to utilise when he had had Daniel to act as diplomat.
Daniel however had not really changed which had led to his terribly false assumption that they had slipped back into their old roles of interaction. Totally ignoring the full consequences of past actions and emotions. Something he would have to apologise to Jack for.
But that was not the only apology he realized he owed Jack.
“Jack, I don’t know if you know that Janet and I have been meeting up to talk about everything that has happened and been happening.”
“I know,” Jack stated bluntly.
“You know?” Daniel looked owlishly from behind his glasses at Jack. “How do you know?”
“Daniel, I command Iðavöllr,” Jack said bluntly, “no one gets on or off my ship without my express permission.”
“Oh,” Daniel said softly looking at Janet and receiving confirmation from the redhead that what Jack just said was true. Janet’s visits to Alaris and his one trip onboard the Asgärd vessel had not been as incognito as he had thought. “If you know I visited Janet onboard Iðavöllr a few days ago, why didn’t you drop in to say hello?”
“Other business,” was the only answer Jack offered.
Daniel looked like he was going to be mulish on the point, before letting it pass. Questioning Jack on that point was something he would have done while on SG-1, and while it had not always been an acceptable thing to do those years ago, it was definitely not acceptable now.
Setting his coffee mug down Daniel cast a fidgety look around the mess tent, which by now was nearly empty of people and girdled himself to say his apology. It was not exactly the right time or place for what he was going to say, but if he did not say it he did not know if there ever would be and putting it off only made things more difficult.
“Jack,” Daniel said seriously and waited until the man looked up from his pie at his face. “I owe you an apology.”
Jack’s fork paused in the act of cutting another bite of pie. “For what exactly?”
Daniel’s answering smile was merciless and directed at himself. “For a lot of things, but mostly, for not believing you when you did what was your job and warned us about the Aschen.”
Jack set his fork down and kept Daniel’s steady gaze. “Then, can you tell me why you blew not just what I had to say, but me, off?”
Daniel marshalled his thoughts and attempted to explain to himself first why he—they—had been so vicious in attacking Jack and the warnings he had given. If he could do that, then maybe he could explain it to Jack.
“All that we can say in our defence I think,” Janet spoke up, “is that we were desperate for the war with the Goa’uld to end. So when the first opportunity presented itself to us, we took it at face value. And could not bear it when someone asked the very questions we should have been asking ourselves.”
Both men looked at the medical doctor whose brown gaze only met Jack’s eyes. “Questions like, if they were so advanced, why were they willing to share technology when similar advanced societies had not been? What were the benefits to them or their society?”
Those were only two of the many questions that Jack had outlined in his warning report and been callously dismissed by his colleagues who should have known better. Had in fact benefited from, often with their lives, by those very questions he had asked countless times before.
“So Sir, you have my apology as well,” Janet said formally. “My apology and my thanks for not allowing our dismissal of your warnings to prevent you from pursuing the course of action you took to show us the truth.”
Sombrely Jack inclined his head signalling his acceptance of her apology.
The only formal apology he had gotten to date had been from Sam. She had given it years ago some months into their initial investigation of the Aschen that had revealed the first facet of the Aschen’s sinister agenda for the Confederation. He knew that Sam had struggled to get him to not just accept her apology, but really forgive and move beyond in the first years of their marriage. Jack had not expected to get any other apologies from his former close circle of friends. Daniel, Teal’c, and Janet had been as adamant in their defence of the Aschen as he had been in attacking them.
Daniel cleared his throat and Jack and Janet looked back at archaeologist. “Janet is right Jack but there is one aspect that I want to add. For myself I dismissed most of what you said as military paranoia and being unwilling to concede that we had found an answer that didn’t involve weapons. I didn’t stop to think that it wasn’t paranoia but the very training that had served us ever since we’d stepped through the stargate.”
Jack tiled his head marginally in acceptance.
“We believed so strongly because we needed to,” Daniel said passionately, “because what we were doing was bigger than ourselves. Was bigger than our friendship. What I failed to keep in mind was that I was not the only one wanting an end to the Goa’uld war. The end of the war meant far more to you than it meant to me. For me it meant an end to the threat of my wife’s killers. To you, it meant you could have the future you so desperately wanted and fought for with Sam. For that failure, you have my apologies and like Janet, my thanks. I am sorry we failed you as friends and I thank you for continuing to fight.”
Jack and Daniel held gazes for a moment longer before Jack simply stood and vacated the table. As Daniel watched Jack walk away, he knew that apology had just been the first volley in a long and possibly winless campaign for Jack’s forgiveness.
Janet reached for Jack’s abandoned tray to stack it and the dishes with her own. “I am relieved that he accepted my apology so easily.”
Daniel sighed as Janet’s words drove home to him some more truths. “But you and Jack always had a different relationship, a very professional one compared to mine and his.”
Abydos and then serving together on the flagship team had bounded the two men together in a very strong and close friendship. A friendship he had shredded by turning so hatefully on Jack and to his shame; had been close to kicking the man to the curb when Jack had simply pulled away from everyone for Minnesota.
“So, do you feel he accepted yours?” Janet asked softly.
Tiredly Daniel gave another mournful sigh as he looked into Janet’s brown eyes. “I am sure that he has accepted my apology but he has not forgiven. And with Jack, that road to forgiveness is going to be long and unforgiving in itself.”