Stargate the Movie: Catherine Langford, longing.
The wormhole collapsed, shreds of blue-shifted light seeming to twist and fold out of existence. Behind her, Catherine heard West snap out new instructions, but she ignored the tumult and remained staring at the quiescent stone circle.
Her Ernest had died from this thing that they'd thought was the Door into Heaven. Now Daniel Jackson was also gone through the Stargate. She'd pressed the Eye of Ra into his hand and wished him luck, but she knew West didn't really expect them to return.
Despite her own doubts and uncertainties, Catherine wished she could have gone with them, too.
Season One: Cassandra, career. Spoilers for Singularity.
Janet stroked her hair and asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up, sweetie?"
Cassandra hesitated, biting her lip.
What did she want to be? That was easy. She wanted to be back on Hanka with her family, where she'd lived happily until terror blanketed her world with flushed faces and wet coughs that escalated into rising fevers, delirium, and death. She wanted to be ignorant of Nirrti and naquadah -- and even of Earth.
"I want to be myself," she finally answered.
She could never be what she wanted. But at least she would grow up.
Season Two: Sha're, home. Spoilers for Secrets.
When Sha're first fought her demon, she'd scratched metaphorical nails bleeding and broken before retreating, exhausted, to a secret corner of her mind where she'd dreamed of home.
And now here she was, back on Abydos. Her father smiled with anxious eyes, drawing her gently indoors. It seemed just as she remembered.
But Danyel was gone, and Skaara was gone, and someone else's child grew in her belly. The demon slept, lazily purring as it coiled around her soul, but she knew it could take control whenever it wished.
This wasn't home, Sha're knew. She'd been banished to the underworld instead.
Season Three: Linnea, history. Spoilers for Past and Present.
Long ago, before Hadante, Linnea played with DNA helixes and made molecules dance at will. The equipment here on Vyus was primitive in comparison, but she'd studied the history of Dargol and discovered its potential.
She glanced sidelong at the elderly couple who sat, holding hands, waiting for the results. Her mouth twisted in wry, bitter amusement. The others had protested vigorously against human testing, but Linnea knew they would eagerly apply her process if she succeeded.
That knowledge -- all knowledge -- gave her power. She would never stop pursuing it.
She lifted the pipette and added the last crucial drops.
Season Four: Sarah Gardener, loss. Spoilers for The Curse.
Sarah couldn't stand the idea of losing the chance to really examine the canopic jar from the Stewart Expedition.
She knew she risked losing her position if someone discovered her breaking the seal without permission, and when pottery rocked and fragmented, she was terrified that the Insitute would lose all rights for future studies.
But when the thing rose hissing from the floor and leapt towards the back of her neck, and she screamed and screamed and screamed until it silenced her vocal cords against her will...
It was then that Sarah really understood the meaning of loss.
Season Five: Reese, fear. Spoilers for Menace.
Reese remembered her father saying that her ability to create was the greatest proof of her humanity. Machines only follow programming, no matter how sophisticated. Innovation proved that she was real.
She'd tried to show these people that she could create, sculpting mother and child to reassure. But she'd seen the look in their eyes, and felt the answering frisson shiver along her own nerves in response. They feared her. She needed protection, so she needn't be afraid in return.
She took the primitive scissors and reshaped them into something that might only be a toy... or something much more.
Season Six: Drey'auc, pride. Spoilers for Redemption.
Drey'auc thinks of those heady days when she and Teal'c first bonded. She thought herself proud then -- wed to Apophis' First Prime, mistress of her own home, raising Ry'ac with all her fierceness and strength. The devastation of Teal'c turning shol'va was a grievous wound; it was long before she learned of the Tau'ri and his true intentions, and the pain of his absence healed slowly.
But now as her mind fades, gasping for breath, symbiote gone, Drey'auc realizes that she feels true pride: not just for Teal'c's achievements and example, but for herself and all others who choose to die free.
Season Seven: Janet Frasier, duty. Spoilers for Lifeboat.
Janet tried to tell herself to remain professional: to be caring and empathetic, yet maintain her distance. Especially now, confronted by a dozen conflicting personalities, she needed to be Doctor Fraiser, carrying out her duties, and not the good friend of the man whose mind had been hijacked by frantic, bodiless souls.
But when the planes of Daniel's face shifted into tremulous anxiety, and the adult voice rose into the high-pitched query of a child asking for his father, Janet couldn't help but reach out in comfort to little Keenan. Sometimes a hug was part of her duty, too.
Season Eight - Sam Carter, regrets. Spoilers for Threads.
There are many things Sam has regretted over the years: choices, repercussions, too many deaths. She didn't think she'd want to go back to change the big decisions, but second-guessing of the little details came naturally to a person who tended to prefer the cool logic of numbers to the freewheeling chaos of everyday life.
But for all the things she wished she could change, Sam knew, as she leaned down to kiss Jacob one last time, that she would never regret the desperate chain of events that gave her these last six years with her father.
Thanks, Jolinar.
Season Nine: Sara O'Neill, beginnings. Very vague spoilers for Cold Lazarus and Fragile Balance.
Sara O'Neill glanced down at the non-disclosure agreement.
"Once I sign, you'll explain everything?"
Major Davis nodded.
"Why now?"
"General O'Neill told his superiors in Washington that your discretion in reporting the... odd sighting of last week only reinforces your silence regarding what occurred eight years ago." Davis' mouth quirked. "Your loyalty has never been in question, ma'am. But now the general has enough clout to make this happen."
Sara thought of the young face she'd glimpsed that perfectly matched the man she married thirty years ago. She couldn't resist the chance to finally understand Jack's life.
She signed.
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