Under Construction: Foudation
Under Construction: Foudation
by Meriem Clayton
Summary: Sam, Daniel, and Jack are held prisoners for months and their captors change Sam forever. When they are rescued, Sam's changed reality is at odds with the decisions Jack and Daniel have made about changes to their lives.
Category: Action/Adventure, Angst, Drama, Romance, Series
Season: Season 7
Pairing: Daniel/Sam, Daniel/Janet, Jack/Sam, Jack/Sara
Rating: 13+
Warnings: adult themes, minor language, sexual situations
Author's Notes: Thanks to my wonderful betas, Monica and Jess
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story was created for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 07/24/05
Major Samantha Carter was really nauseated. It seemed like she was nauseated all the time. At the rate she was throwing up, she was a little mystified as to why she wasn't losing weight. In fact, maybe she was even gaining a little. Sam had methodically worked through all the possible reasons for her intestinal problems and none of them made sense. She had been in this 12 foot by 12 foot cell for what must be at least five months but only sick for the past two and . Two and months seemed excessive for food poisoning or a stomach virus. Further evidence against the food poisoning hypothesis was the fact that her bowl of mush had never tasted or smelled any different from the first of her three daily meals to the last or from one day to the next. She was sick to death of it but, if it hadn't made her ill for the first half of her captivity, it didn't make sense that it would start doing so in the second half.
As a scientist, she realized that there were several possible fallacious a priori assumptions undergirding her belief that it wasn't a virus. Earth diseases of this sort didn't run this long but who knew what the diseases were like here on P4T890? There was the assumption that she had to have caught it on earth which would make for an excessive incubation period. Maybe she was wrong to dismiss infection here but she based it on the fact that she hadn't seen anyone but her captors in the entire five months. They were always gowned, gloved, and wearing something akin to surgical masks when they dealt with her. It seemed as if they were trying very hard to avoid being contaminated themselves or contaminating her. Sam had noticed a number of attributes that made her doubt they were human or perhaps were humans who had mutated a long way from Tauri-style humans. This also seemed to raise questions about what, if anything, she could catch from them.
There was one avenue of investigation that she had great difficulty forcing herself to consider. Her mind wanted to skitter away from it. Every time Sam tried to analyze the possibilities it implied, she would find herself thinking about something else, uncertain why she was no longer considering what might have been done to her during her drugged periods. But they surely happened. The lights would go out. Then she would smell something faintly garlicky and have to sit down quickly. Fortunately, even if she had fallen before she blacked out, she was literally living in a padded cell. The floor, walls, and ceiling of her room were all covered with the same seamless moss green plastic like substance, broken only around the door and at the ceiling over 4 feet above her head where there appeared to be the local equivalent of video cameras. She speculated that the green substance had been sprayed on. It couldn't be scratched or written on despite the fact that it yielded sponge-fashion to the touch.
It did seem an inescapable conclusion that they examined her while she was unconscious and did tests on her. Sometimes when she came to herself in her cell, she found pricks in her skin. Sometimes her anus, her vagina, or her throat were sore as if something invasive had happened. Her best hypothesis for the nausea was that they had done something or were doing something on a regular basis when she was unconscious that was making her sick, possibly injecting her with something to see how she reacted.
It also appeared that her drugged periods were when clean up took place and they bathed her. Her cell was always spotlessly clean when she came out of her stupor to face bright lights and an empty cell. Any mess she might have made was gone. Of course, how much mess could she make? They kept her naked, her head shaved, and her nails cut short. All she had in the cell with her was the bed with some sort of soft substance molded on to it, the bowl with the mush which she was expected to eat with her fingers, a cup and a pitcher of water, a stack of roughly 12 x 12 sheets of white paper, and, in a depression in the floor, a sort of field toilet/bidet. The bowl, cup, and pitcher were made of something plasticine in appearance and completely unbreakable. She didn't even have a blanket, although in the even warm temperature of the cell it wasn't needed for warmth.
The paper had mystified her at first. Initially, all she could think of to use it for was origami but even that was limited since it was very hard to tear. Then one day, she discovered that water worked like ink on it. If she dipped her little finger in her cup, she could write. They left what she wrote unless she crumbled a sheet and threw it to one side. It seemed likely that they took her work and did the local variation of Xeroxing before returning it though. Why else would they have given her the paper than to try to gain insight into what she knew or what she was thinking?
Sam forced herself to begin her daily exercise regime despite how poorly she felt. Physical exercise, things you could do with paper, and mental activities were the only ways to pass the interminable days. She'd already spent too much time this wake period on thinking, obsessing about being ill, fruitlessly reviewing the nonexistent possibilities for escape, and worrying about what had happened to Teal'c, Daniel, and Jack. At first worrying about them had completely overwhelmed her for days at a time. Sam had only been able to keep it from consuming her when she began to rediscover the prayer of her childhood.
Sam did a full workout routine, starting and ending with stretches, and running through sit ups, push ups, running in place, jumping jacks, and every other exercise she could think of. She exercised for hours and only stopped when she was too exhausted to continue. Then she did what yoga she could remember. Spending your day naked definitely got you in touch with your body and she had been able to take pleasure in how toned she had become. It made the slight weight gain even more distressing.
Knowing her captors would look at anything she wrote made her reluctant to write so she mostly did artwork and designed houses. Very tired now, she sat on her bed, leaned back against the wall, and pulled over her collection of plans so far. She leafed through them, reassuring herself that there was no way her wardens could ever figure out the significance of the two sets of floor plans and home illustrations she drew and refined day after day. Even more to the point, thank God, there was no way anyone in Stargate Command would ever do so even if they saw them. The homes she was designing were intensively private because these were the houses she would have if she married either of the men that she spent more and more time fantasizing about.
When the fantasies had first started to take hold on her a few weeks after she was locked away, she had firmly repressed them. She didn't even want to think about how huge the embarrassment factor would eventually be when she had to look her fantasy partner in the face again. She was determined to believe that she WOULD be looking him in the face someday. Then when she couldn't fight it any more she launched a second set of fantasies about a second man, reasoning that this would keep her from falling too deeply into some madness where she began to believe it was all real. Or at least that was how she explained having intimate thoughts about a man who had always been firmly in the best friend category. Sam refused to address whether the fact that she eventually gave in to the daydreams, accepting the inevitability of future embarrassment, meant that, on some level, she had decided that her teammates were dead or that she would never leave here alive.
The first set of plans and drawings she picked up showed an A-frame that was integrated into the wilderness that surrounded it. It was built very close to water and included a boat house and dock. There were decks running the length of the house, circling a hot tub, and meeting steps to the water and the dock. Inside the house wasn't that big, designed as it was for a childless couple. In addition to the master bedroom and a fantasy bath with a huge sunken tub, there were only two smallish guest bedrooms. The kitchen was designed for efficiency, not gourmet cooking, but there was a room next to the garage for making beer. There were huge windows and no planned window treatments, except in the bathrooms, because the house was in the middle of nowhere. She worried a little about the windows, given the frigid winters, but she was still working her way around that.
Sam walks through the house in her mind now. She finishes making the bed, retrieving half the bedding from the floor, cast there during a heavenly season of afternoon delight hours before. She walks down the open, winding stairs to the kitchen and goes to stand at the kitchen sink, looking out the window at a beautiful evening in late summer. Her husband is walking up the steps to the deck from the boat dock, trailed by a black lab. No, she corrected herself. She had decided there would be two dogs, a black lab and a chocolate lab. He's carrying two large fish and stops to lay them on an outdoor table they use for gutting and cleaning. He affectionately, but sternly, corrects one dog who is a little too interested in the fish and then comes on into the house with the dogs dancing excitedly around him. She has anticipated this scenario and already taken two doggie treats out of the cupboard. She hands them to him over the bobbing and excited canine heads.
"Sit, Samuels. Sit, Maybourne," he says and the dogs do as they are told. He takes great satisfaction in giving orders to dogs so named and discussing how Kinsey has fleas or Maybourne is chasing his tail.
Then he comes over to her and puts his arms around her waist and kisses her neck. She protests, laughing, "Your hands are all fishy," but she doesn't really care.
He says, "I guess I should take a shower or maybe a bath." He squeezes her and kisses her neck again before letting go and walking out of the kitchen. "That would mean that I was in that great big bathtub totally naked, all by myself. Did I mention naked?" He grins. Did that man ever have a high voltage grin, a little naughty around the edges, and just wonderful.
He goes on up the stairs, whistling. She puts the fish in a cooler to protect them from pillaging animals during this unplanned interlude. Then she goes to the refrigerator, gets out two Guinesses, takes two frosted beer mugs from the freezer, and follows him. When she reaches the master bath, he is already in the bathtub with the jacuzzi jets turned on and the water frothing around him. Sam puts the drinks down on the wide edge of the tub. She undresses very slowly, throwing a little of the stripper into it, while he leans back in the tub, his eyes little more than slits, watching very appreciatively. At last she eases into the bubbly water and sits down on his lap facing him.
That was as far as Sam took the visualization this time: sitting on his lap, feeling all the hard planes of his body against her and his eyes, hot with passion, roaming over what was right in front of him.
She picked up the other stack of drawings and plans then. They showed a large Victorian, with five bedrooms, all full. As befit a house with two sets of twins and three adopted children brought through the gate from ravaged worlds, there was a large, sunny playroom at the back, next to a huge, eat in, country kitchen. The backyard was fenced and furnished with a full compliment of swing set, geodesic dome climber, sandbox, monkey bars, and tree house. There was a dog house out there for an improbable looking mongrel. His body parts seemed to be assembled from many, not too compatible donor animals, but the whole was more than the sum of the parts and the kids loved him. He shared their affection with two cats, two hamsters, and a parakeet.
As she walks through the house in her mind now, it is impossible not to notice the piles of books and papers that litter all surfaces above the level of an inquisitive five year old. Everywhere you could put one, there is a built in bookshelf, all full. She picks up a doll here, a truck there. Her husband doesn't want any toy guns in the house and there aren't any, but there are GI Joe action figures and she just knows that at least one of their brood are going to go military on him, whether he likes it or not.
It is 9:30 and all the little ones are in their rooms, if not necessarily asleep. The bedtime ritual is an extravaganza, presided over chiefly by their father, which goes on for over an hour every night. First there is the book reading. Each child picks a book every other night. Little Kirk always gets his read first if he has a pick. The child cannot stay awake for longer than one book and it's only fair. Kirk is their answer to the challenge of naming a child after Teal'c. They wanted to honor Teal'c but they didn't want to give a child a name that would lead to endless teasing. They had asked Teal'c himself and he suggested that they name a child after James T. Kirk for whom he felt an improbable kinship.
After the reading comes the individual activities in each bedroom. The littlest ones love to have their father make improbable guesses about what he is feeling through the bedcovers. He feels a knee and says, to wild gales of giggles, "Is this a bicycle?" With the older ones he tells stories. Frequently, it is tag team story telling in which they take turns taking over the narrative, sharing the story with their father and the sibling sharing the room. He uses these stories to slide in training in the mythology of Greece, Rome, and Egypt.
Finally, tonight, everyone is settled in. He comes down the stairs and she meets him at the bottom and hands him a cold glass of tea. He puts his arm around her and slides his hand down until it cups her backside. They walk into the living room, remove two stuffed animals and a Lego construction from the sofa and sit down.
"Remind me how we managed to have the second set of twins when we never have a moment to ourselves," he asks.
"I seem to remember you pulling me into the laundry room while the kids were playing in the backyard and making love to me between the washer and the shelf with the detergent and the fabric softener," she answers.
He puts the tea down on the coffee table, already so child scarred that it would be a waste of time to worry about making rings. He reaches over and pulls her around on his lap. He finds a smudge on her cheek from a kiss by a gooey mouthed child hours ago. She has never noticed it and now he gently wipes it off. He takes off his glasses and puts them on the coffee table, next to the tea, and begins kissing her, touching her, making her forget all the children, and the house, and the pets, and her job and his. He unzips her jeans and is about to slide a hand inside when a little voice pipes up, "Mommy, Daddy, I had a bad dream."
Sam dropped the drawings into her lap and realized that there was a tear rolling down her cheek. She never cried after the Jack scenarios. If anything, she usually felt aroused. The Daniel scenarios, though, brought a lump to her throat and such a sweet sense of sadness. She really didn't understand herself at all.
She was beginning to get really hungry. Clearly there was something irregular going on. She received her mush at very regular intervals that her stomach was programmed to expect. She was very tired and really wanted to get her food so she could go to sleep.
Suddenly she had confirmation that, indeed, something was happening. There was noise outside her room, something which never happened. Her wardens never spoke in her presence and apparently were very quiet outside of it as well. There was a sort of muffled thump and then sharp reports like rifle shots and shouting. Were those words in English?
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Sam stood up, tense with excitement. She heard someone at the door and then, just as the door was swinging open, realized her nakedness and grabbed two pieces of paper. Sam had just positioned them strategically when two members of an SG team rushed into the cell. They stared at her and she at them for several beats. Finally, the officer, a Captain Langetti she remembered meeting a half dozen times, said, tentatively, "Major Carter?"
Sam could understand his hesitation. She had not been nude or bald the last time he had seen her. She wanted to answer him and almost couldn't speak. In five months, she had hardly used her voice. Finally she got out, "Yes. Oh, yes, thank God. Can we please get out of here?"
The officer nodded but then said to the enlisted man who was considerably larger than he, "Sergeant, please give Major Carter your jacket."
He handed it over quickly and they both turned away as she dropped the paper and put it on. Sam wasn't short and the jacket still left part of her lower half hanging out in the breeze. She snatched up one of the pieces of paper again and said, "Uh, there's still a problem. Do you have anything else?"
Captain Langetti thought a second, set his weapon down, removed his jacket and whipped off his tee and handed it to her. "I think you can stretch the neck enough to sort of pull it down around your waist. But please hurry Major." Sam complied. As she started to exit the cell, she realized she couldn't leave her papers behind. She darted back and stuffed them inside the jacket and then followed the others out.
It was her first opportunity to see what lay outside her door. She had been knocked out when captured and awakened in the cell. She discovered a low-ceilinged corridor with recessed lights along the walls stretching off some way into in the distance.
The two airmen hurried her along to a cross corridor and then a short distance later, after turning to the right, they encountered Jack and Daniel and more SG team members. The two men had shaven heads, as she did, and were wearing the self-same tee solution around their loins. Her whole body felt lighter when she saw their faces and knew for sure, for the first time in months, that they lived. The fantasy embarrassment factor was in the back of her mind but had no room to surface when she was so consumed with pure relief. From their expressions they felt the same way about her. In the brief seconds before all three came together in a clumsy but enthusiastic group hug, she noticed that they had apparently been spending a lot of time in calisthenics just as she had because they both looked even more buff than she remembered them.
A second SG team came pounding down the corridor toward them. "Out now!" yelled the commanding officer.
Sam said urgently, "Teal'c. We have to find Teal'c."
Daniel grabbed her arm and pulled her along, saying as they ran, "Teal'c was never captured. They said he's been hiding out in the hills around here, evading them but not able to get back to the gate. He finally did just a day or two ago and brought our rescuers back. He's with the party securing our escape route and the gate.
Sam nodded, vastly relieved. Daniel dropped her arm and they ran on then, Sam clutching her makeshift clothing as they made their way outside. Immediately after exiting what was apparently an underground installation, a huge explosion ignited below them and they were momentarily knocked off their feet. The commanding officer immediately urged, "On your feet. Double time back to the gate."
It was hard running without shoes and trying to avoid the embarrassment of losing her clothes but she managed it. She would have run across burning hot coals to get off this planet and back to her real life. When they reached the gate, it was so good to see Teal'c but there was no time for greetings. The address had been dialed as the team saw them approach and they literally ran into the gate without stopping.
On the other side, there were waiting blankets for each of them since their condition had been called ahead. General Hammond was there, beaming ear to ear to see them, but clearly looking concerned as to what their treatment might have been when he saw the shaved heads. They were immediately hustled to the infirmary, Teal'c walking quickly beside them.
Dr. Janet Fraiser was not pleased with the zoo the infirmary threatened to become as half the base, it seemed, came dropping by to welcome the long lost members of SG-1. It took very little time to reassure herself that there was probably nothing wrong with Daniel and Jack other than cuts on their feet from the barefooted run. She took blood samples of course and had them go off and produce a urine specimen. They threw on some scrubs and met the well wishers out in the hall so that she could focus on Sam who, alone, reported any symptoms or problems.
"So," she said reviewing everything Sam had told her, "you've had all these symptoms roughly two and a half months: nausea and vomiting, extreme tiredness, frequent urination, and sore breasts. How's your menstrual cycle been?"
Sam looked at her with dawning comprehension. "Wait a minute Janet. There is no way I could be pregnant. I didn't see anyone but my captors for 5 months and I didn't...didn't do anything with them."
"Answer my question." Janet said firmly but sympathetically.
"You know how it is when women exercise heavily. I didn't have a period for the first 9 months I was at the Air Force Academy." Janet looked impatient. "Okay, about a month after I was captured was the last time. But, Janet, come back to the main point. I'm not Mary and this isn't a case of immaculate conception."
"Exactly," Janet said. "Look, Sam, it will be very easy to do a pregnancy test. I'm going to do a pelvic exam right now. We'll know one way or the other soon. If you are, then we can figure out what they might have done during the periods when you were drugged. If you aren't, then we'll look for other explanations for your physical problems."
Sam didn't leave the infirmary until the pregnancy test had been completed. When Janet told her the news, she went very white and Janet grabbed her, thinking for a moment that she was about to fall over in a faint. When she was a little more composed, Sam asked, "So, I was obviously impregnated while I was drugged and out. Okay, let me confirm with you that I have thought of all the possibilities I could be facing." Janet nodded, encouragingly. "They could have implanted a human embryo which could be, I guess, from anywhere including one of my own eggs fertilized by any one, including," she winced, "including one of my team mates. I don't believe that our captors were human so unless there were other humans stashed somewhere, my team mates are the most likely fathers." She could hardly go on but was impelled by a sudden horrid thought to blurt out, "Could it be an alien baby Janet? A different species?"
Janet made a face. "It's possible but I don't know that you could continue to carry an alien's baby now. I would think there would have to be things they would be doing to keep the pregnancy viable."
Sam bit her lip. "God help me for feeling this way about an innocent baby anything but I am just as glad I couldn't actually become the mother of an alien baby. Okay. So much for implanting an embryo. I guess they could have artificially inseminated me. Once again the candidates are an unknown pool but most likely Daniel and Jack."
Janet sighed and said, "I think that about does it."
Sam looked at Janet absolutely stricken. "So, if I am pregnant, the highest probability is that I am carrying Daniel or Jack's child. Janet, you can't tell anyone. You just can't."
Janet took her hand. "Sam I don't want to make things difficult for you but I have to report this to General Hammond. Look, we'll be able to do amniocentesis by 16 weeks and look at the DNA. You may be already be that far along now. We'll do an ultrasound and measure the limbs to try to get a fix on dates. Then if you're far enough along we can do the amnio." She paused and added quietly, "Or you could decide to have an abortion at any time. It's your choice."
Sam was horrified. "I don't think I believe in abortion but even if I did, I couldn't abort Jack or Daniel's child. They've already lost so much."
Janet lowered her head and studied the floor for a moment and then looked up at Sam. "I can keep it between me and General Hammond I think until we get the test results. You do know that even if we can do amnio right away, it will be 2 to 3 weeks before we can get test results. But you are in fabulous physical condition and this is your first child. You're not going to show probably until five months. We can keep this quiet." Sam started to get up but Janet put her hand on her arm and held her back for a moment. "I'll schedule the amnio for tomorrow and be sure that it's handled discretely." She hugged Sam then. "It'll all work out somehow."
Sam just nodded and walked unsteadily from the infirmary, turning back at the last minute to ask anxiously, "I had some papers. Do you know what happened to them?"
Janet nodded and picked up a large manila envelope from her desk. "What are these anyway?"
Sam just shrugged and said, "Some things I was doodling in the cell. I guess I've developed some security blanket thing for them." She left with the envelope under her arm and was utterly shocked to find that Jack and Daniel had been waiting for her the entire time. They moved up on either side of her and each put an arm around her. "We're just famished for some of the cafeteria's food," Daniel said.
Jack said, "They will never again experience appreciation like they're about to get from us."
Daniel objected, "What about that time we were caught in that temporal loop and you had to eat Fruit Loops day after day?"
Jack laughed and said, "I didn't say never before did I? I said never again because I'm personally not ever going to allow myself to be forced to eat the same anything two days in a row EVER again."
Sam could tell from little side long glances that they were worried about her but had apparently decided the best way to handle it was to act as if nothing was wrong. Their fake heartiness continued all the way to the cafeteria. The men loaded their trays to the breaking point. Sam's tray would have been almost empty if they hadn't kept insisting that she had to try this or that.
When at last they sat down, Sam briefly told them her experience, editing only detail about her physical problems. She talked about the unadorned cell where the lights never went out unless she was about to be drugged, the paper, being kept naked. They nodded throughout her narrative having experienced all of the same conditions. Jack said at last, "That's pretty much our story except we were together."
Sam looked at them surprised. She simply hadn't realized that they had been kept captive in the same cell. "What was that like? Did you get on each other's nerves?" she asked, thinking to herself that they surely drove each other batshit.
Jack said, "It got that way. By about the third month we were arguing about everything. We actually had a couple of fist fights. But then, we worked past that."
Daniel continued, "You live 24-7 with another guy in one small room and you are either going to kill each other or come to the point where the other person is well," he paused and looked at Jack searching for a way to say it, "almost like the other half of you, I guess."
Jack noticed then that Sam's tray was almost in the same condition it had been when they sat down. "Sam, you've got to eat." He picked up a fork and loaded it with some chocolate cream pie he had stuck on her tray earlier. "Open up. Come on."
Sam couldn't help but react like a crazy woman. Her eyes bugged out of her head and she pushed his hand with the fork away from her so abruptly that the morsel of pudding and whipped cream flew off the fork and it plopped in the center of the adjoining table. He couldn't know that one of her fantasies had had them feeding each other chocolate cream pie just like this while wearing considerably less clothing. "I'm not hungry," she said mortified and unable to avoid sounding like a virago. She got up abruptly and said, "I'll see you tomorrow," before fleeing the cafeteria.
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Daniel and Jack sat, stupefied, watching her leave. "Should we go after her do you think?" Jack asked.
"I think she needs to be left alone for awhile. Reentry is going to be hard on all of us. I've read stuff about recovered POWs in Viet Nam and concentration camp victims liberated at Buchenwald. We're going to have to reintegrate into our own lives. You don't just walk back in and resume everything as if you never left."
He paused for a breath and before he could go on Jack raised a hand and said, "It's started." This was their code for when Daniel started to run on and on and Jack really didn't want hear any more. Daniel immediately stopped without any hard feelings.
Daniel took a bite of his own chocolate cream pie and closed his eyes in ecstasy for a moment. Jack laughed at his expression and asked, "So, what do you think was in the envelope?"
Daniel shrugged and said, "I dunno. Some test results maybe from Janet? So, not to change the subject but have you called Sara yet?" From the expression on his face, it was clear what he expected the answer to be.
Jack said, smugly, "You think I didn't but buckaroo, we made a pact for what we would do if we ever got out of there. I keep MY word. When I left you waiting for Sam so I could take care of a couple of things, that was one of the things."
Daniel flinched. He hadn't acted on his part of the pact yet and Jack knew it. They'd had a lot of time to contemplate what would happen if they never left the cell. It hade taken almost the full five months but Jack had admitted to Daniel that he still loved Sara, almost 8 years after their divorce. He had found Sam very attractive and sensed something from her but, in addition to the severe career fallout, there were his unresolved feelings for Sara, the woman he had loved since his teens. He swore that if he survived, he would make an effort to win her back.
Daniel smiled widely. "And??" he prompted.
"She found out I was missing. I think it got her thinking about missed opportunities. Anyway, she not only didn't hang up on me, she agreed to go out to dinner with me. This may be easier than I thought," Jack finished, smiling pretty widely himself. He looked challengingly at Daniel. "When are you going to make your move?"
Daniel grimaced. "Well I could hardly talk to her when she was closeted in the infirmary, behind closed doors, right? I'm planning on trying a dinner invitation out myself tomorrow."
"You know I'm going to be checking for a progress report," Jack warned.
"You're going to be a real pain in the butt about this, aren't you?" Daniel observed without irritation. He leaned forward and rested his head on his hands, suddenly feeling very tired. "What sort of condition do you think our houses are in? They told us they've been keeping my rent payments up but I wonder if there's five months layer of dust inside. Mold spores." He shuddered for effect.
"Little allergy bombs waiting to strafe you," Jack observed sympathetically. "I was wondering the same thing but all my stuff is at my house including my uniforms." He looked down at the scrubs. "I look like Dr. Jeff Weber from General Hospital."
Daniel didn't say "before my time" because during their hours of conversation Jack had shared his unnatural knowledge of 70's era General Hospital gained during a few months of recovery from a very serious wound. They had pretty much been scraping the bottom of the barrel for subjects at that point. Daniel puffed his cheeks out and then released the air slowly. "I guess, but how do we get home? We don't even have cars here."
Jack pulled a key out of his pocket. "I already took care of it. Motor pool. You live farther. You drop me off and go on home and then come by and get me in the morning, okay?"
They went with that plan and two hours later after a warm shower, Daniel lay in bed having more problems than he would ever have believed with being alone in a dark room. Finally he got up and turned the lights on. That made him feel a bit more comfortable but he still was tense. The noises bothered him. All he was used to was the sound of another person breathing, not cars driving by and the neighbor's dog barking. As predicted, his allergies were protesting. He lay in his bed for two hours, tense as a board, and dealing with bouts of sneezing. He realized how much he wanted to talk to Jack. He looked at the clock. In their prison it would be the middle of the night now but here it was only 10:00. You could call people at 10:00, right?
"O'Neill," Jack answered instantly sounding fully alert. Daniel was relieved. He didn't sound like he had been awakened from anything.
"Jack, It's Daniel," Daniel said, unnecessarily, and then went into a fit of sneezing.
"You've having trouble sleeping," Jack observed matter-of-factly.
"Yeah. How are you doing?"
"Not sleeping," Jack admitted.
"Look, Jack, I can't sleep here. I've got to hire a cleaning service or something," Daniel said, afraid that dealing with the allergies would only be half the problem but knowing he had to start somewhere. "I want to go back and get a bunk at the Mountain but I've got our car. If you're up anyway, would you mind if I picked you up and you went to the Mountain with me so you could get the car?"
"Actually, I think I would rather sleep at the Mountain myself," Jack said. "My house is not right somehow. Come on by and get me. I'll be ready."
Before midnight they were back at the Mountain and had gotten a couple of bunks in one of the rooms of four bunks that were available for personnel as needed. They left the lights on and as each closed his eyes and heard nothing but the sounds of familiar breathing, dropped off to sleep immediately.
The next morning after breakfast which was still an incredibly sensual delight to Daniel, he headed for the infirmary. As he walked he speculated on why he wasn't having any problems at all enjoying real food again but was having so much difficulty with other aspects of his life. It was a puzzle he still hadn't solved when he reached the infirmary and, to his delight, found Janet in her small office at the back. She looked up, very glad to see him, and it gave him courage. "Janet," he asked hesitantly. "Would you have a moment to talk?"
"Sure, Daniel," she replied, smiling warmly up at him and indicating a chair.
Daniel made a couple of false starts at a sentence and finally said, "You know, Janet, when you aren't sure if you're going to get out of a situation, you start thinking about missed opportunities."
"That makes sense," Janet agreed.
Daniel looked up very quickly, made eye contact, and then cut his eyes away. "I knew this was going to be hard but I just, I can't do this. I'm sorry Janet." He stood up as if to leave.
Janet stood up too and walked around the desk to him. "Daniel, whatever it is, it's upsetting you. Haven't I been a good listener? You can tell me."
Daniel said ruefully, "You have absolutely no idea what I'm getting at, do you?"
Janet laughed a little, "You'd be surprised. You're talking about Sam, right? Your feelings for her?"
"My what?!" Daniel sputtered. Janet was not the first person who had assumed he was carrying some sort of pathetic torch for Sam. Just a trickle of gossip from the grapevine had reached him before they were captured. Just enough to know that most of the base suspected Sam had a thing for Jack and that a fair number of them thought he was sweet on Sam with no prayer of it going anywhere. It reminded him of being a geek in high school. Of liking one of the popular girls who dated the cool guys and hearing how people snickered at him. Despite the fact that he was here to ask Janet out, her question pushed a button deep inside of him and he said in a tone of voice not likely to help advance his objective, "Actually, JANET, I came in here to ask YOU out."
Her mouth was hanging open and she was completely shocked. "You came in here to ask ME out!" she finally forced out, her tone one of complete disbelief.
He tried to moderate his tone but he was still pretty annoyed. "Just forget it. It was a stupid idea."
"Oh, no, Daniel, not stupid at all," she said, placatingly. "Please sit back down. I've actually thought about asking you over for dinner, doing something myself to see if we might be good together but I thought..." she trailed off.
Daniel lost all his remaining irritation and smiled shyly at Janet, immensely flattered. Speaking quietly, he groped for an explanation. "Look, I won't deny that I wondered at one point, once I got past losing Sha're if Sam and I might work out but it was a waste of years, Janet, just years of my life. She's attracted to military guys, her ex-fianc, Jonas, and let's face it, Jack. Maybe she's looking for someone like her father. But she sure isn't looking for someone like me. So, I sat there in that cell and thought about the need for moving on and I found myself thinking about you." He leaned forward and fixed his beautiful blue eyes on her. "So, what do you think Janet?"
For a moment she looked like she might be thinking about saying yes but then her face fell. "Daniel, there's something that has to be dealt with and it's going to take about 2 or 3 weeks. I don't mean to sound like a secret agent or something but I need to have you ask me that question again, if you still want to and only if you still want to, then." She darted a quick look to the part of the infirmary visible through the partially opened door and reassured of privacy, took his hand, squeezed it, stood on her tiptoes and leaned into him for just a second, saying softly, "Okay, Daniel?"
He looked at her warm smile just a few inches from his face, and couldn't help but be encouraged. "Okay," he returned softly.
They remained standing close to each other, looking into each other's faces for a moment longer, a moment too long. Daniel caught a movement out of the corner of his eye and wheeled to look at Sam, there in the doorway. She looked very unhappy to see him. "What are you doing here, Daniel?" she asked almost belligerently.
Daniel wanted to make allowances for everything they had been through but he couldn't help but wonder at her tone and coming on the heels of her dramatic exit from the cafeteria the night before, he was one part very concerned but also one part a little peeved. "I just wanted to visit a little with Janet. I've missed her."
Janet had quickly moved away from Daniel and back around her desk. Now she said, "Sam just needs to do a couple of follow up tests from yesterday, Daniel. If you wouldn't mind excusing us?" she added, her oddly gentle tone of voice at odds with the dismissive nature of her words.
"You okay, Sam?" Daniel asked, instantly concerned.
Janet answered rather than waiting for Sam, "It's nothing, Daniel. It's just I needed to run some slightly different tests on a woman than on a man and didn't get finished yesterday."
"Okay. Let me know if you need anything, Sam," Daniel said as he left. He knew there was something more going on than either woman was admitting. Sam was a terrific soldier but they should never use her for espionage. She was too open.
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Sam and Janet went to the room where Janet had set up the equipment for ultrasound. One of her staff who had been trained in the technique joined her. Sam changed into the paper gown and lay down on the examining table. Warm gel was smeared on her abdomen and the woman began to move something around on her mid-section as pictures appeared on a monitor. Janet provided a running commentary to Sam as to what they were looking at and what it meant.
Almost immediately, she made a soft exclamation. "Will you look at that!"
"What," Sam asked, afraid that Janet had seen babies with tentacles or extra limbs.
"You're carrying twins, Sam. See the two separate sacs?" Janet pointed on the monitor. Sam could indeed see two separate sacs with little creatures inside of them. Sam was overcome with so many overwhelming emotions she gave up trying to sort them out. She wanted to laugh and she wanted to cry. The rest of the process was a blur but the outcome was that Janet concluded that she was probably about 4 months pregnant.
"I don't have the equipment or the expertise to try to do the amnio," Janet said, "although we can do the DNA analysis here once we get the fluid. Remember I told you it'll be 2 or 3 weeks before we know anything. I've made an appointment for you at Presbyterian. Here's the information," and she handed Sam a card. "I called in a favor and they can do it this afternoon. Do you want me to go with you?"
"That's sweet, Janet, but I'll be okay." She started to leave, tucking the card in her pocket but turned back for a moment. "What was going on with Daniel, really, when I came in? You wouldn't have told him anything?" Sam sounded very apologetic for the question but still clearly needed to be reassured.
"It really had nothing to do with your condition, Sam," Janet obliged her by saying. Janet seemed to hesitate and then said, "Sam, we've talked about Daniel and you've always said you could not think about him romantically any more than you could your brother Mark. You've been encouraging me for months to make a move in his direction. Let's say he was your baby's father. Would you be thinking about marrying him? Would it matter if he was involved with someone else, well, like me?"
Sam was preoccupied with her own problems and not really in the mood for this discussion which presumed Daniel would be the father before she had even had the tests. But Janet was a good friend and she deserved an answer. "I'd want Daniel involved in our child's life but marrying someone you don't love, not romantically anyway, just because you're having a baby together doesn't make sense. Sooner or later one of you will meet someone you do love and there'll be hell to pay." She thought to herself about her fantasies about marrying Daniel and having a houseful of children but they had only been fantasies to pass the time in captivity and to keep from getting too into the idea of being married to Jack, right?
Janet said, "That makes sense to me. Good luck at the hospital." Sam nodded absently, her mind already on the tests, and went on.
After Sam finished with the procedure at Presbyterian Hospital, she noticed the hospital chapel on the way out. On a whim, she slipped inside and sat in the simple but beautifully appointed little room. Prayer had made the difference in dealing with her fears for her teammates in captivity. They had all escaped and she hadn't yet said thank you. She left the hospital a half an hour later, feeling just a little less alone.
The next two weeks were like running an obstacle course. Daniel and Jack were the obstacles. She didn't want to talk to either one of them if she could avoid it. The level of difficulty increased as they began actively trying to find her. Inevitably there were occasions when she found herself forced to talk with one or the other or the both of them but she managed not to give anything away. She also managed to really worry both of them. It was plain from the expressions on their faces and the too patient "I'm talking to a sick person" tone of voice they used even when she as an absolute bitch.
Through great force of will, Sam avoided crying at work but that was the only time she wasn't at least sniffling. She knew with some sort of completely unfounded precognition that the babies would belong to either Daniel or Jack. It would be a huge problem, ruin her friendships probably with both men, and possibly torpedo her career. Then there was what would happen when her father heard about this. That thought was truly chilling.
Two weeks and two days after the test -- Sam knew exactly how long since she was definitely counting -- she got a phone call from Janet. As luck would have it, both Daniel and Jack had cornered her in her lab when she picked up.
Janet said, "Sam, I've got the test results. Do you want to come down and talk about them?" Janet's voice was flat and gave nothing away.
Sam didn't know if she could will her body to go to the infirmary. It was as if she had to strike now before she had any time to think about it and lose her courage. "Just tell me. Please."
"Sam, wouldn't it be easier in person?"
Sam looked at Daniel and Jack who didn't look particularly interested in her end of the conversation. She had to know now. "Wouldn't change anything would it?"
Janet sighed. "Okay. Sam, you are carrying fraternal twins, both boys. You're the mother. They have different fathers. One is Jack's and one is Daniel's."
Suddenly Daniel and Jack became intensely interested in her conversation as Sam's eyes rolled up in her head and she fainted, only missing cracking her head on her desk because Jack moved unbelievably fast. When she came to, she was stretched out on the cot at the back of her lab with Janet leaning over her. Daniel and Jack were hovering behind her. Sam was overwhelming tired and just wanted a fast trip to an alternate reality. Instead she levered herself to a sitting position.
Janet began checking her over despite her protests. "Sam, you need to take care of yourself and you absolutely need to see a doctor if you have anything like this happen again. There are complications that could be indicated. I think you should come down to the infirmary with me."
Sam shook her head vigorously. "Not now, Janet. I can't. Not now."
Janet looked at the two men quickly and then back at Sam. "You don't want to stay here, do you?"
The two men looked at each other. Sam could tell that they knew she and Janet were speaking in code somehow. "It'll be okay. Daniel and Jack'll stay here with me. I need to talk to them, anyway."
Janet looked mildly surprised which made Sam realize she probably thought Sam was planning on telling them about the babies now when all she meant was finishing up the work related conversation they had been having when Janet called. There was no way to correct the misunderstanding easily so she just let it go and made a mental note to clear it up with her later.
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSss
After they finished their discussion with Sam, Jack and Daniel walked a short distance down the hall, and stopped to talk. Daniel leaned back against the wall and stated the obvious, "Sam's got to be having some sort of continuing medical problem from when we were captives."
"I'm so glad you spelled that out for the little people, Danny," Jack said.
"I hate leaving her alone," Daniel added.
"Wake up and smell the rejection, Daniel," Jack said, moving to lean back next to Daniel. "She's been avoiding us pretty hard. Right now, she shooed us out of there like she had a hot date showing up momentarily." He slapped Daniel on the arm. "Let's talk about something more upbeat. It's time for my daily progress report. You got an answer from Janet yet?"
"I told you, Jack," Daniel responded patiently, "she said wait a couple of weeks."
"A couple of weeks it has been, young Padwan learner," Jack said.
"You've been talking to Teal'c, haven't you?" He's been ODing on "Star Trek" and "Star Wars" ever since we came back."
"The question you have not answered," Jack continued without a let up.
"Okay, okay. If you'll drop the Yoda imitation, I'll go talk to her," Daniel conceded.
"If it will make it easier, why don't you two join Sara and me for dinner at Scampi's?" Jack suggested.
"Let's see if she'll go out with me at all before we worry about that," Daniel said.
As he went to the infirmary, he couldn't help but think about Sam's mysterious problem. As a result, he walked into Janet's office looking pretty upset. Janet saw his face and developed an expression of instant sympathy. "I hate what Sam's going through," Daniel said without preamble and dropped into Janet's guest chair.
"What are you going to do?" Janet asked.
"I can't do anything, really. I mean she wants it to be her problem and she doesn't want to let Jack or me help her." They sat in silence for a moment. Then Daniel straightened up, determined not to stay down. He was free after all and would never eat mush again. "Look, Janet, when we talked a couple of weeks ago about, you know, dating, you said ask again in a couple of weeks." She was staring at him absolutely amazed. Daniel suddenly thought maybe he had misread the signals. "I'm sorry. I guess maybe you were just trying to let me down easy. I'll just go."
"Daniel, you are more trouble to keep in a conversation. You just keep trying to bolt," Janet said sounding a little amused. "If my reaction is strange, I just wasn't expecting you to still be interested. I thought you would be tied up with Sam's situation."
Daniel refused to let himself get irritated about this continual attempt to pair him with Sam. "Janet, I will always be there for Sam but I can only do what she will let me do. She loves me but she doesn't love me. You know? I've got my own life."
"And you don't think she'd be upset by you going out with me given her situation?" Janet stated it more like confirmation of something she believed to be true than a question.
"Huh?" was all that Daniel could come up with.
"Then okay. Let's try a date and see how it feels."
Daniel could see he had true missionary work ahead of him getting the image of Daniel pining away for Sam out of Janet's head but she looked so adorable and pixyish at that moment that he was willing to do the time. "Great. Jack suggested we join him and Sara for dinner. Would you like that? She's a really fun lady."
"Sara, as in his ex-wife?" Janet asked.
Daniel nodded. "Is that a problem?" he said a little surprised.
"Of course not," she said. "I just didn't know." She changed the subject quickly to get past the awkward moment. "You want to pick me up or meet at the restaurant?"
"I'll pick you up. Let's say at 7:00. I'll make sure of the time with Jack and let you know right away if it's off." He smiled, suddenly a little shy, and said, "I'm really looking forward to it."
After he left, Janet tried to call Sam, sure that she needed someone to talk to after the experience of announcing two of her closet friends that she was having their child. She didn't answer. SG-15 came back through the gate a few minutes later with several wounded, two gravely. Janet barely was able to leave in time for her date and never had time to call Sam back.
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
In all the years she had been at Cheyenne Mountain, Sam had never left work once in a fit of pique. She felt she had built up a whole bank account of self-pampering moments that she should be entitled to use if she could ever quell her workaholic nature long enough to do it. As she watched Jack and Daniel go out her lab door she just knew she couldn't stay there a moment longer. It was time to dip into her account.
She went to the Mall first and spent a young fortune in a Bath and Body Works on creams, lotions, bath products, and candles in the aromatherapy line. She went for things that were supposed to induce calm and serenity. Then she stopped at a video store and got a sack of DVDs for all her favorite comedies, heavy on the Kevin Kline films. She stopped in a bookstore, initially looking for good escapist fiction but found she was drawn to the books for expectant mothers. She was a scientist. If something was happening to her body, she should understand it from a scientific point of view. She noted with great curiosity that she was having far less problem with crying than before she received the test results. It was easier now that she actually knew for sure. She could begin to do something rather than just dread what she might have to do. Sam knew that the first thing she had to do was tell the fathers but it should be done right. This was the beginning of two children's whole lives, of their relationships with their dads.
After months of feeling queasy, Sam's appetite had picked up in the last couple of weeks. She had found that she craved Italian food in particular. In one of her rare conversations with Jack and Daniel over the past few weeks, Jack had mentioned a new Italian restaurant he had become quite fond of, Scampi's. She called them and ordered a big Italian meal for pick up to go with the aromatherapy and the DVDs. She was waiting patiently off to one side for them to bring her food out to the front when the door opened and two laughing couples came in. She looked through some ferns to see Jack and Daniel. Jack had his arm around Sara, his ex-wife. Sam couldn't believe it. She had no idea he was even seeing her. Sara was convulsed by something he was whispering in her ear. Daniel was with Janet. While Sam watched, Daniel leaned over and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. Janet murmured something and Daniel grinned at her affectionately. They vanished from view, immediately ushered to their reserved table. Sam cautiously ventured out of her alcove, virtually snatched the food out of the hostess' hands and fled into the night.
By the time she got home, she was crying great shuddering sobs, and barely able to keep the car on the road. She hadn't chosen to get pregnant but she was. She had been sick as a dog for months. Her life was about to be turned upside down and her babies' fathers were out on the town with other women, never mind that she had given one of them her blessing. She dropped the food on the counter and saw the stack of drawings from her captivity. The contrast with her fantasies was crushing. She picked up the drawings and crammed them into the fireplace. The smoke carried her dreams up the chimney and the warmth fled her body and her heart as the ashes cooled and grew cold.
Then something wonderful happened. Her babies moved. Butterfly flutters tapped at her abdomen. She rested her hand on her stomach and said, gently, "Hello babies." That was too impersonal. On the spot she named them. They might have nothing else of their fathers so they were entitled to their names. "Hello Danny. Hello Jacky." It wasn't Sam alone. It was the three of them together. Then she realized that in addition to the company of the two unseen babies there was the presence of the unseen God who had been with her in her prison cell. Her heart slowly warmed and she sat for a long time in an embrace with unseen love.
If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Meriem Clayton
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