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USAF Starship Prometheus – Intergalactic Space – November 2002
There were two teams that O’Neill always knew would be there to back SG-1 if he needed them, the first was SG-2 under the command of Lieutenant-Colonel Louis Ferretti, the second was SG-3 currently under the command of Major Warren. Regarding the latter O’Neill was firmly convinced that the Marines just enjoyed getting into firefights more than was healthy but as for SG-2 it was Ferretti himself that made the difference, he was a good officer with just the right combination of brains and balls to get the job done which was not to say that you could expect unquestioning loyalty and sycophancy because that wasn’t Ferretti’s style.
‘I think I speak for everyone here Colonel when I ask’ Ferretti began slowly, ‘are you yanking our chains?’ he asked incredulously as everyone in the ships mess hall currently being used as a briefing room stared at O’Neill.
‘No, that’s really what we’re doing out here’ O’Neill replied.
‘You’re telling us we’re being towed to another galaxy by an Asgard Warship and when we get there we’re going to fly on our own to a Solar System full of Replicators, land on a planet we think is probably teeming with them, and then fix a machine that’s supposed to trap them there?’ Ferretti asked doubtfully.
O’Neill nodded. ‘Glad to see you were paying attention’ he responded.
The members of SG-2 and 3 looked at each other. ‘You’re serious?’ Major Warren asked eventually.
‘Yeah, to be honest with you this is pretty much how I took the news as well when Thor arrived in orbit asking for our help’ O’Neill admitted. ‘I did say it was a dangerous mission I was asking for volunteers for’ he pointed out to everyone. ‘We didn’t have much time to talk before Prometheus got back to Earth, Thor just beamed everything aboard we asked him to and we needed to get going straight away.’
‘And the President approved this?’ Ferretti checked. ‘I mean they can replace us cheaply enough but the X-303 here is worth a lot of money’ he noted. They had spent over two billion dollars on R&D for the hyperdrive alone he knew.
‘Once Thor pointed out that once the Replicators have eaten everything worth eating in the Ida Galaxy they’ll head for the Milky Way next it wasn’t too hard to get approval for the mission fom the man upstairs’ O’Neill told him. ‘If we don’t pull this off we’re probably just setting ourselves up as bug-fodder later on when we’ll have no chance at all of beating them’ he said.
‘As opposed to the really slim chance we have now’ Ferretti replied wryly.
‘You know from a mathematical standpoint even a tiny probability of success is infinitely better than no chance at all’ Carter interjected. ‘You know the Asgard plan was really quite clever’ she opined. ‘Trapping the bugs in a time dilation field is a good to keep them bottled up for long enough to figure out a solution to them’ she said.
‘Inside the field time would flow ten-thousand times more slowly’ Jonas chipped in. ‘If it took the Replicators a year to escape then Asgard outside would have had ten millennia to design weapons to defeat them with in the meantime.’
‘And like oh so many clever plans it didn’t actually work’ O’Neill pointed out.
‘It worked partially’ Carter replied. ‘The copy they made of Reese based on the scans Heimdall took and the additional research by Harlan into Reese herself did give them a means to order all the Replicators to converge in one spot.’
‘The bait worked fine Carter it was the trap that failed’ O’Neill replied, rolling his eyes. ‘Why they just didn’t gather them up and then blow them all to hell is a mystery.’
‘Wouldn’t have worked Sir’ Carter replied. ‘Even blowing up the planet and making the star it orbited go Super-Nova wouldn’t have gotten them all’ she said.
‘It would have reduced them to a more manageable number at least’ O’Neill muttered.
‘Not for very long Sir’ Carter told him. ‘Not at the rate they reproduce’ she said. ‘The Asgard needed a better solution than just levelling the playing field for a while.’
Major Warren looked puzzled. ‘So they used this android to call in all the bugs?’ he asked.
‘Right’ Carter confirmed. ‘We know that the Replicators were originally created by Reese and the Asgard discovered that there was still a core command in their code which would respond to a subspace signal she could transmit’ she said. ‘They sent the signal using their Reese copy, amplifying it as much as they could and then started the countdown on the time-dilation device, giving it as much time as possible before activation so that all the bugs could get there before the trap sprung closed.’
‘Wouldn’t the first bugs that arrived have eaten the time-gadget?’ Ferretti asked reasonably. ‘We’ve seen those things eat trinium for Christ’s sake!’ he exclaimed.
‘The Asgard encased the device in neutronium, the densest material known’ Carter replied. ‘They calculated how long it would take the Replicators to eat through and left a good margin of error just in case’ she continued. ‘They shouldn’t have been able to get through the casing before the time-dilation field activated and caught everything within point one-six light-years in the space-time bubble it generated’ she said.
‘Should have generated’ O’Neill remarked. ‘It didn’t work so the Asgard came to us our help.’
‘Why us?’ Ferretti asked. ‘They’ve got better ships than this and it’s their gizmo that screwed up’ he noted.
‘No Asgard vessel could go through Replicator held territory unmolested’ Carter replied. ‘The Prometheus is mostly built from Goa’uld and Earth-based technologies and is so primitive by comparison that the bugs should ignore it as just not worth the trouble of eating’ she continued. ‘The only things on this vessel that might interest them if they knew about them are the elerium-based systems but we know that Loki’s designs cannot be easily detected by Asgard sensors which are the ones the Replicators tend to use or Goa’uld-style sensors either for that matter’ she said. ‘If we were scanned up close elerium would probably only look like regular naquada anyway, they’re the same element just in a different allotropic form.’
O’Neill nodded. ‘With the bugs, going low-tech is often the answer’ he agreed. ‘We know that Goa’uld staff-weapons and zats don’t do a damn thing to them, but they shatter pretty nice when you hit them with a bullet or some buckshot, so our way of fighting is a better bet if we have to fight our way in and out of there’ he said. ‘Thor told us that the thing we’re after is in an old temple on one of the Asgard Worlds named Halla, so we land right next to it and go in hard and fast before the bugs realise what the crazy humans are trying to do’ he said. ‘The Asgard have got guts, their fleet has been fighting the Replicators for a long time, but they’re not exactly cut-out for a job like this’ he noted. ‘For a start I can’t exactly see Thor packing an AA-12’ he joked, everyone laughing in response. The automatic shotguns the SGC liked to employ against Replicators had recoil which would probably break an Asgard’s shoulder with the first shot even if he could carry it.
‘Thor has provided an interface to the device which is made out of Earth-based technology and materials rather than Asgard technology’ Carter told them. ‘It’s about fifty times larger than the original but it should work and shouldn’t cause the bugs to want to eat it because our microprocessors and copper wiring just aren’t worth snacking on’ she said.
‘How do we stop the bugs just switching it back off after we leave?’ a Marine queried. ‘You’re not planning on just flipping the switch and trapping us with the bugs are you?’ he asked suspiciously.
Carter shook her head. ‘We have a Goa’uld force-field generator which should keep them off it long enough to get away’ she said. ‘It’s pretty bulky and weighs well over a hundred pounds with the power-cells so I’m looking for a volunteer to carry it’ she said, ‘Looking at you Teal’c’ she told the Jaffa with a grin.
‘This is blatant discrimination against extra-terrestrials’ Jonas opined to Teal’c. ‘She’s already got me carrying the backpack with the interface in it’ he complained.
‘Indeed Jonas Quinn’ Teal’c agreed. ‘We need a better union’ he decided.
‘Solidarity Comrades’ a woman’s voice from the back spoke up in support. ‘Stand up against the oppression of the proletariat’ she said.
‘Don’t encourage them Andianov’ O’Neill responded.
‘I am merely positioning myself for when the revolution comes’ the Russian replied, trying to sound serious about it.
‘Do you want to carry the force-field generator instead Sergeant?’ O’Neill asked rhetorically.
Andianov thought about that for a second. ‘As Marx wrote, from each according to his ability, to each according to his need’ she replied. ‘Teal’c is stronger and therefore better suited and able to the job and I need to avoid straining my back’ she stated.
‘Okay, so now we’ve decided that Teal’c gets the short straw according to good Marxist principles can we continue?’ O’Neill asked, trying not to laugh as Andianov now studiously avoided making eye-contact with the Jaffa.
‘Do we have a back-up plan Colonel?’ Ferretti inquired.
‘We detonate our hyperdrive and all our nukes and try to take as many of the little fuckers with us as we can’ O’Neill replied flatly.
Ferretti raised his eyebrows. ‘Well Plan A looks a whole lot better now anyway’ he decided.
‘Thought it might’ O’Neill responded. ‘Alright, we know lasers probably won’t work so I want everyone carrying an automatic shotgun with a P90 as backup’ he ordered. ‘We’ve got boxes of FRAG-12 High-Explosive ammo for the shotguns which we think should work pretty well because the replicator blocks from the one you blow to pieces might shatter the other bugs next to it as a bonus’ he said hopefully. ‘Just don’t use the HE rounds point blank for safeties sake’ he advised. ‘They supposedly don’t arm until they’re three yards or so out from the muzzle anyway so you’d probably just be wasting them anyway’ he said. ‘Carry a mix of FRAG-12’s and Buckshot, as many drums as you can carry which should be a lot because we’re not planning to hike anywhere.’
‘As well as standard concussion grenades we have a crate of elerium grenades which explode like a satchel charge of C4’ Carter told them. ‘Make sure which one you’re throwing and really put your arm into it if you’re chucking an elerium one’ she advised.
‘According to Thor we’ve got a few hours to prepare’ O’Neill told the teams. ‘Towing us is really slowing him down supposedly’ he said.
‘Of course mere hours to travel between galaxies is still pretty impressive’ Carter commented. ‘It would take a Goa’uld Ha'tak years to do this trip’ she said. Captain Ronson and the rest of the crew that had volunteered to stay aboard for the mission were probably as nervous about what this journey at breakneck speed was doing to their ship as they were the Replicators at the other end, Thor reassured them that Prometheus would be fine but they were currently tearing across the universe at a frankly ludicrous and frightening velocity. Most of what Earth knew about hyperdrives came from the Tok’ra, and knowledge gained from back-engineering Goa’uld designs, but this was a whole new ball game and looking at the number of light years they were currently doing per second was disturbing to anyone with a hint of imagination. It did however help explain why the Replicators would ignore the X-303 which must look stone-age by comparison to the Asgard vessels that the bugs usually encountered, X-COM wouldn’t be all that interested in sending a UFO Retrieval Team to capture a hot air balloon made by the Montgolfier brothers either.
O’Neill dismissed the troops and headed for the bridge. They could have decided to just go this one alone, SG-1 and the X-303 against the universe, but it was the smarter move to bring backup. A skeleton crew might save lives short-term if the mission failed but long-term they were better off putting more resources into this so it had a better chance of working. Thor had noted that if they packed the ship out with grunts that might possibly attract Replicator attention for a different reason so General Hammond had compromised with the dispatch of his three best teams, the ones who had proven time and time again that they could get the job done. Normally the Prometheus would carry well over a hundred crew but currently had less than fifty aboard including the SG Teams so if scanned it would look practically empty and even more unthreatening it was hoped, getting there in one piece was the first hurdle after all.
As he got into the elevator that would take him to the bridge O’Neill wondered what the Replicators had thought when they found the copy of Reese left as bait as it transmitted the signal that summoned them. Would they see the android as technology to be assimilated or might they recognise the progenitor off their mechanical race he pondered. In some ways it would be like looking at the face of God he theorised, not that he thought the bugs had either a soul nor the ability to think in those terms, they were more like a virus than a truly sentient species.
The Replicator’s God had not made them in her own image, what it hadn’t occurred to O’Neill was that perhaps on meeting her they might decide to remake themselves in hers.
Halla System – Galaxy of Ida – November 2002
Colonel Ronson nervously watched the Replicator controlled ship approach it did not seem to be of Asgard design and must have been captured from some other poor and possibly now extinct starfaring race the damn things had encountered at some point. ‘Our shields are down and none of the weapon systems on-line like you said but I’m fighting the instinct to open up on that ship with the Rippers and the Beams right now I don’t mind saying’ he told O’Neill, now stood behind him on the bridge.
‘Bugs work on instinct too’ O’Neill replied. ‘They’re short on initiative but provoke them and they’ll be all over us’ he told Ronson. ‘We don’t look like good eating and we want to look completely unthreatening too’ he said.
A bright light seemed to appear throughout the ship. ‘We’re being scanned Sir’ Major Gant reported, looking at her console.
‘Nobody here but us primitives’ O’Neill muttered. ‘Nothing to see here, carry on about your business’ he told the Replicator ship.
The light went away and the Replicator vessel moved off again, Ronson breathing a sigh of relief. ‘Guess they didn’t pick up on anything of interest’ he said.
‘Saving us for a snack later after finishing the main course of a galaxy full of Asgard treats’ O’Neill replied. ‘We’d have only given them indigestion anyway’ he joked.
Ronson nodded, the Sectoid Plasma Beam weapons might have proven a great deal more dangerous to the enemy ship than the overall level of the ships technology base would have indicated. ‘Continue on course for the LZ Major DeLouise’ he told the pilot, ‘just make it look like we’re out for a pleasant inoffensive stroll across the cosmos’ he added.
‘We’ll be whistling nonchalantly on the subspace frequencies Sir’ DeLouise replied with a smile, the joke coming out much less forced than he feared it would. In reality he was scared as hell like anybody sane would be in the circumstances.
Major Carter had been looking over another console and looked up. ‘I don’t know how they did it but like Thor told us before he cut the Prometheus loose the time-dilation field is definitely active and in reverse’ she reported. ‘Every hour outside the field is roughly four days inside it’ she said.
‘Damn bugs are too smart for comfort’ O’Neill complained.
‘Yes Sir they seem to have an innate ability to understand technology and improve upon it’ Carter replied. ‘In any case we’re now inside the field ourselves so we’ve got as much time to work with as they do now’ she said.
‘We are detecting one structure at the designated coordinates provided by Thor Sir’ Major Gant announced. ‘The rest of the planet seems completely barren, no life ad no other buildings, I thought this was an Asgard Colony?’ she asked.
‘To the Replicators inside the reversed dilation field they might have had decades, even centuries to consume everything on Halla by now’ Carter replied. ‘The temple with the time-dilation device inside is probably the only thing they wanted to keep intact’ she reasoned.
‘The weather looks pretty choppy, lots of storms, could be a shaky landing Sir’ DeLouise commented as they approached the atmosphere.
‘Just don’t break the ship, it’s brand new’ O’Neill commented. ‘Carter lets go gear up’ he told his second-in-command. ‘You will be waiting for us right?’ he asked Colonel Ronson.
‘As long as a traffic cop or a billion bugs don’t move us on we’ll still be right where we parked’ Ronson replied. ‘Try not to be too long though, we don’t want a ticket.’
O’Neill chuckled. ‘Just remember that if things get dicey...’
‘Turn this entire area into a smoking radioactive crater’ Ronson interrupted.
‘Right’ O’Neill confirmed.
‘If nothing else blowing up the time-dilation device will stop the Replicators using it’ Carter remarked brightly.
‘The Major is clearly blessed with a sunny disposition, it would be a shame if we had to spoil it with a short-lived artificial sun of our own’ Ronson responded, ‘but if Prometheus is going down we’ll bring the gadget and plenty of Replicators with us don’t you worry’ he stated with determination. Overloading the hyperdrive would yield an even bigger explosion than his naquada-enhanced nuclear missiles and they were 1200 megatons apiece, a fair chunk of the planet Halla would be devastated if going out in a blaze of glory became the final option.
‘Pity we couldn’t borrow a few of those Tollan super-bombs’ O’Neill remarked to Carter as they left the bridge.
‘The technology was too advanced, the bugs would have wanted them’ Carter replied sadly. ‘They would have left quite a hole though’ she agreed. ‘They go from the energy equivalent to the asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs and upwards in yield’ she said. ‘The Chicxulub crater in the Yucatan is over a hundred and ten miles in diameter and that would be a small UFT bomb detonation.’ she noted.
‘Now you see that’s my idea of firepower’ O’Neill replied enthusiastically.
‘Their most powerful devices can crack a whole planet, like happened to Serita, but to be honest anything more than a 100 teraton explosion triggering a mass-extinction event is probably overkill’ Carter observed. ‘Cracking the crust down through the mantle and exposing the core is just showing off’ she opined.
‘Teraton?’ O’Neill queried.
‘Thousand gigaton, or a million megatons’ Carter explained.
‘Ah’ O’Neill replied, as they got into the elevator. ‘Better not let Sharp hear you use the o word though’ he advised. ‘The word “overkill” is probably blasphemy.’
‘It is easy to imagine him in the congregation of that atomic bomb worshipping cult they had in one of the Planet of the Apes movies’ Carter agreed as the elevator doors slid shut.
The loading ramp lowered and SG-1 leading the three teams stepped out onto the surface of Halla. ‘Where are the bugs?’ one of the Marines asked, his automatic shotgun shouldered and ready for action but the flat featureless landscape under the dark foreboding sky peppered with electrical storms was deserted. The ground seemed to be nothing but dust and sand under their feet as they started making their way towards the nearby temple.
‘Major Warren please tell your team not to tempt fate’ O’Neill told the commander of SG-3 sternly. ‘They’ll be saying “What’s the worst that could happen?” next’ he complained.
‘Yeah, the bugs probably saw Prometheus coming and thought “What could one ship like that do” and look where that’s going to get them’ Ferretti agreed. ‘Thou shalt not take Murphy’s Law in vain’ he advised.
Carter bent down and brushed away some sand. ‘Sir you’re not going to like this’ she said nervously.
‘The planets entire surface seems to be made of Replicator blocks’ Teal’c declared, looking down at the area Carter had brushed clear.
Everyone looked down. ‘Oh I’d have felt better not knowing that’ Ferretti stated.
‘Probably more than one layer, and who knows how thick it is. Maybe miles?’ Carter suggested.
‘Why would that be?’ Jonas queried.
‘Well, it could be a by-product of the reverse time dilation’ Carter theorised. ‘In relative time, they’ve been here hundreds of years, but there’s nothing left here to consume so they’re just conserving energy.’
‘So what’s keeping them here?’ Jonas wondered.
‘Who cares? Just watch your step’ O’Neill replied, leading off again.
‘I wish I was wearing sneakers instead of boots now’ Major Warren commented. ‘I really don’t want them all waking up just now’ he said, walking gingerly.
Reaching the temple O’Neill ordered SG-3 to wait outside and himself and Ferretti entered first, finding a set of stone steps leading down which they descended. Finding a large room where Thor had told them to expect to find the Time-Dilation Device Carter spotted it and dashed over, Teal’c and Jonas starting to unpack the equipment they were carrying. ‘Sir, the original interface is still intact. I might be able to…’ she began.
Footsteps other than their own caused both teams to spin around weapons ready as a young man in grey clothing with a quizzical expression appeared. ‘Who are you?’ he asked.
‘Colonel Jack O’Neill, US Air Force, Earth’ he replied. ‘Who are you?’ he asked in return.
‘The others are coming’ the young man declared.
Four others similarly dressed, two male two female appeared. ‘What do you think you are doing?’ one asked. By appearance he was the oldest.
‘Clocks are running a little fast around here. Thought we’d stop by, wind ‘em. We’ll be on our way’ O’Neill replied, his AA-12 leveled at them, he like the other SGC personnel had already switched from explosive rounds to buckshot for close-quarters combat as soon as they entered the building.
‘Your companion is attempting to alter the settings on the time device, and we cannot allow that. If she does not stop immediately, we will be forced to take action’ the man responded.
‘Well, now, if you do that, we might be forced to take our own action’ O’Neill retorted.
The man looked increasingly determined. ‘Tell your companion to stop’ he ordered.
‘Carter, how much time you need there?’ O’Neill asked.
‘A lot, sir. Maybe a few hours’ Carter replied apologetically.
‘Hours?’ Ferretti moaned.
‘The interface has been completely rebuilt. I’m not even sure where to start’ Carter admitted.
‘Couldn’t you crank it up a little bit?’ O’Neill asked. ‘Move things along?’
‘It doesn’t work that way, Sir’ Carter responded. ‘I just wish that we’d bought Dr Zelenka along to help’ she added.
‘He wasn’t keen as I recall’ Jonas remarked. The scientist had been among the first to say yes to Thor’s offer of beaming anyone off Prometheus that didn’t want to come.
The oldest of the strangers laughed. ‘Ironic, isn’t it?’ he asked rhetorically, ‘it takes time to alter a machine that alters time’ he said in amusement.
‘Who are you people?’ O’Neill asked him. ‘Because, if you haven’t noticed, this entire planet is paved with Replicators’ he pointed out.
‘We are aware of this’ the man replied.
‘Then you should also know that these things have taken millions of lives, and they’ll keep on doing that unless we stop them’ O’Neill told him.
Another of the strangers shook her head. ‘He doesn’t understand’ she said.
‘You know, he’s standing right here’ O’Neill noted sardonically.
‘We cannot allow you to stop them, I’m afraid’ the man told them.
‘Why the hell not?’ Ferretti asked.
‘We are Replicators’ the man replied.
‘Ah’ O’Neill responded, nodding his understanding as he opened fire, the rest of SG-1 and 2 doing likewise, volleying shotgun rounds at the strangers who simply stood there ignoring it for the most part. O’Neill dropped his AA-12 and switched to his P90 but the armour-piercing rounds had no more effect than the lead shot.
O’Neill stopped firing as did the others. ‘Switch to HE’ he whispered as replicator bugs started to appear.
‘Tell your companion to step away from the device’ the apparent leader of the human-form replicators ordered.
Andianov dropped her own AA-12 but instead of her P90 she reached for the pistol on her belt and drew it. ‘Sir may I try something else?’ she requested.
O’Neill shrugged. ‘Why not, I got nothing’ he said.
The Russian X-COM Sergeant aimed her pistol at the female replicator who had spoken. ‘Loki designed this weapon for use against the bugs, I am interested in finding out if it works on these creatures too’ she said, pulling the trigger, ‘and it does’ she said happily as the green bolt of energy from the elerium plasma pistol in her hand slammed into the woman and blew a hole right through her sending her spinning away. ‘Back off or I go full-auto and take you all apart’ she ordered. Normally she carried a laser pistol but had swapped it out for something she had decided was more likely to work.
The Replicators looked as much surprised as frightened. ‘Directed Energy weapons are ineffectual against our kind’ one stated, ignoring the evidence of his own eyes, they were clearly quite human to some degree in emotional terms too, already demonstrating humour and stupidity.
‘Technically it’s a super-heated beam of relativistic kinetic death’ O’Neill told him, glad he had memorised the phrase. ‘So I guess the question is if you assholes have a sense of self-preservation?’ he asked.
‘Second can be rebuilt’ one responded, though O’Neill noted that the replicator bugs had not leapt to the attack leading him to believe they were being ordered to stay away.
‘An exact copy maybe but I wonder if it wouldn’t really be her any more’ Carter spoke up. ‘And I think you think so too’ she added.
‘If you injure another of us we will kill you all’ the apparent leader of the replicators vowed.
‘And if you attack us then the Russian gunslinger there blows important pieces off you’ O’Neill responded. ‘Carter make a note, next time we fight Replicators Heavy Plasma Rifles for all’ he said.
‘I’ll remind you Sir’ Carter replied. ‘Sir I was serious earlier, it’ll take me hours to fix this’ she told him.
‘Not the most clichéd Mexican Standoff I’ve been in I’ll admit but I’m wondering who gets to make the next move’ O’Neill said. ‘It looks like we all want to live which is a good start now where do we go from here?’ he asked.
‘Your grounded vessel is already being targeted by our ships in orbit’ the first replicator they had encountered told them. ‘Its destruction will be ordered if you harm another of us’ he warned rather than threatened. ‘I am Fifth’ he continued. ‘My sister you shot was Second and our leader is First’ he said.
‘Andianov you shot Second first so shoot First second’ O’Neill ordered then paused. ‘That made sense didn’t it?’ he checked.
‘Yes Sir’ Andianov replied, well it did in a way reminiscent of an Abbott and Costello routine anyway she decided.
Ferretti slung his AA-12 and pulled the pin from an elerium grenade. ‘I get attacked by a bug, I drop this and we all go to heaven, or in your case evil robot hell’ he announced.
‘Smart man’ O’Neill praised him, doing likewise himself then looking for a place to sit down. ‘Might want to get going Carter, this could be a long day’ he said, taking a seat.
‘You cannot possibly expect to succeed’ First told him as he watched the other humans start to pull pins on grenades themselves.
‘Worst case scenario we all die, best case, you decide to live and let us fix the device and be on our merry way’ O’Neill told him. ‘You’ll be trapped but maybe you get to figure a way out’ he said. ‘Oh yeah, I’ll have our ship deposit a couple of really big bombs with delicate trigger mechanisms just outside’ he said. ‘You try and shoot us down when we take off and it’s adios muchacho.’
‘This is insane’ First declared in an exasperated tone.
‘Welcome to the human condition’ O’Neill replied, ‘and seeing as we’re likely to be stuck here for a few hours with nothing to do but chat, how did you end up like that?’ he asked out of interest.
Halla – Galaxy of Ida – November 2002
O’Neill shuffled uncomfortably where he was sat, he wished the stone floor was more comfortable as he checked his watch. ‘Carter aren’t you done yet?’ he asked. He had already ordered SG-3 to return to Prometheus by radio leaving just his team and SG-2 at the Temple.
‘No Sir and every time you ask me just means it’ll take even longer’ Major Carter replied in a tone that indicated she was getting increasingly annoyed at his periodic interruptions of her train of thought.
Leaning back against a wall Ferretti changed the hand he was holding his grenade in again for about the twelfth time and flexed the fingers of his now free hand, balling a fist. ‘Colonel do you think these guys would object if we radioed the Prometheus and asked them to send over a guy with some pizza?’ he asked.
O’Neill looked at the expression on the Replicator named First, his mood had clearly not improved during the intervening hours. ‘I don’t think they’ll go for it even if we wanted to share, although a gracious host would have at least offered us something to drink by now’ he observed.
‘Organic forms store energy so inefficiently’ First declared scornfully.
‘Yeah but according to the android version of me running on batteries might be efficient but it’s no substitute for a good steak’ O’Neill replied.
‘He must mean the primitive mechanical duplicates we discovered referenced in the Asgard Data Banks found here on Halla when our brethren first arrived’ the one called Fifth realised. ‘Our creator lives with them’ he continued. ‘I would like to meet her’ he said with some enthusiasm.
‘God is going to be a real disappointment guys, gotta tell ya’ O’Neill told the human-form Replicators.
Ever curious Jonas saw a possible opportunity to ask some questions, for much of the time the two sides had simply been staring each other out while Major Carter worked. ‘We’re fascinated as to how you came to be’ he told Fifth, they hadn’t answered earlier but he figured that it was worth another shot at it.
‘He’s fascinated’ O’Neill corrected Jonas. ‘I’ve got mild curiosity at best, most of what I needed to know was answered when the Sergeant blew a hole in the chick the bugs dragged away a couple of hours back’ he said, wondering if the thing was going to be recycled.
‘Indeed’ Teal’c concurred, simply knowing that they already had effective weapons in their arsenal to fight against these new enemies was enough for him too.
Fifth opened his mouth to reply to Jonas but First raised a hand to indicate he would answer instead. ‘When our Replicator brethren discovered the copy the Asgard made of the android Reese in order to draw us here, they realised she was their creator. They studied her design and form and found aspects of her technology superior to their own’ First said.
‘Our brethren are composed of ungainly blocks’ the one called Third added. ‘We are composed of millions of cell units, microscopic in comparison, that combine to create this form.’
‘Like nanites, Sir’ Carter explained.
‘Get back to work Major’ O’Neill responded. ‘I hate those little suckers’ he muttered, ever since being prematurely aged by the ones Pelops had created even the thought of the things made his skin crawl and encountering the ones the Orbanians harvested from their children hadn’t improved his opinion any either.
‘My creation took place in the last moment before the Asgard time device was to activate’ First told them. ‘There was a miniscule crack in the neutronium shell. I could penetrate this where my Replicator brethren could not. I managed to stop the machine before it activated and eventually used it to suit our purpose.’
‘Which is?’ Jonas queried.
‘To increase our number’ First replied. ‘That has never changed’ he said flatly.
‘Someone needs to add some Planned Parenthood subroutines into their program’ Ferretti opined.
‘The device your colleague is so inexpertly trying to revert to its original setting gave us all the time we needed to build an army’ First said. ‘When we choose to leave this place we will be unstoppable.’
‘Not so much a when as an if’ O’Neill responded, ‘a big honking “if” that’s getting less likely to happen with every second Carter there gets to fix your handywork’ he said confidently.
‘Why are you doing this?’ Jonas asked. ‘You’re clearly not unthinking automatons like the other Replicators’ he said. ‘We don’t have to be enemies, we’re so alike, you’re created in our image’ he pointed out.
‘No, in the image of Reese’ the one called Fourth responded.
‘Who was created by a human to look like us’ O’Neill reminded them, trying to sound as patronising as possible. ‘Your creator was just a science project for some geek and you know she’s a long way from perfect right?’ he asked rhetorically. ‘Even after we got her to stop making new Replicators she’s still a pain in the ass’ he declared.
‘The flaw in the emulation programming was discovered in my creation’ First stated. ‘Although they did not activate her higher functions the Asgard copy was a perfect facsimile.’
‘Flaw’s still hanging in there, got to say’ O’Neill responded sarcastically.
‘What actually happened to the Reese copy you found?’ Jonas asked.
‘It was dismantled’ Fifth replied, ‘I feel bad about that’ he said.
First looked at Fifth askance. ‘We attempted to correct the error in the creation of Fifth’ First ssaid. ‘But thus far, he has proven to be far too...’
‘Human?’ Jonas interrupted.
‘Weak’ First corrected him.
‘Maybe Fifth represents what you’re supposed to be’ Carter commented. ‘I’m getting there Sir, just need to let the interface we bought along establish communication with the original device and I can move to the next stage’ she told O’Neill, getting up and stretching.
Fifth smiled at Carter but it was soon wiped off his face again by a look of disapproval from First.
‘Reese, the real Reese is actually quite sweet’ Carter observed. ‘With more time to develop her emotional maturity I think she’ll be a very nice person’ she said. ‘She doesn’t like hurting people, you being like you are is an accident’ she continued, ‘she was upset when she found out the damage her toys had done.’
‘You being very broken, very evil toys’ O’Neill told First pointedly, ‘Lego gone over to the Dark Side’ he said. ‘You were created to entertain a bored android kid not to conquer the freaking universe’ he told them.
‘It is merely the process of natural selection’ First said, ‘the strong survive and the week perish.’
‘There’s nothing natural about you’ Jonas responded. ‘You didn’t evolve, you were made for a purpose.’
‘We know the same about you from the Asgard files’ First retorted, ‘you must grasp that you were made by the Ancients, you cannot think it mere coincidence you look so much like them?’ he continued with obvious amusement. ‘We are both artificial lifeforms, we’re just a lot more accepting of the fact.’
‘Statistically the chances of us evolving to look as much like the Ancients as we know Ayiana did is verging on the astronomical Sir’ Carter had to agree.
‘We’re not machines’ O’Neill stated firmly.
‘If it helps you feel better about yourself to put such a divide between being based on carbon and being based on another element instead feel free to delude yourself’ First told him smugly.
O’Neill frowned. ‘I prefer the ones that you just shoot at and don’t try and get into your head’ he said.
First smirked. ‘Would you like to get into ours?’ he asked.
‘I am sure an X-COM Science Team would be interested in dissecting one of you’ Andianov told him, her plasma pistol trained at his torso and set to full-auto fire.
‘I was thinking something a little less invasive of us and a little more of you’ First replied.
‘He intends to reach into your minds’ Fifth told them.
‘Psionics?’ Jonas asked.
‘No I was being more literal’ Fifth replied, earning another look of displeasure and reproach from First. Carter was starting to get the impression that the one called Fifth was very different from the others, he was over-emotional if anything, something like Reese in fact, and seemed to have far greater empathy than the others. ‘We can reduce the strength of the reactive modulating monopolar energy field that binds our separate cells to become less solid, able to reach inside your brain and interface directly with your consciousness within’ Fifth explained.
‘Not understanding all the words but not liking the idea of a hand being put in my head one little bit’ O’Neill responded.
‘I don’t even like shrinks getting in there’ Ferretti agreed.
‘It would be direct mind to mind contact?’ Carter asked, intrigued.
‘In your terms as if in a dream within the edges of your subconscious’ Fifth told her. ‘We know enough about sentient biological forms to know this is possible’ he added. ‘It would not cause any physical damage’ he noted, ‘but could be extremely painful’ he admitted.
‘Yeah I’ll bet your blocky little buddies have cut open plenty of poor bastards in order to see exactly what makes them tick’ O’Neill responded with undisguised hatred. Jonas thought that Replicators were no more evil than a virus, but O’Neill knew better, evil was defined by consequences as much as by its practitioners and the slaughter which these things would wreak across the cosmos certainly fitted any practical notion of evil he could come up with.
‘Of course, we are the sum total of all that our brethren have learned’ First confirmed, although he demonstrably had some emotions himself he had no feelings on this matter one way or the other. Anything that wasn’t one of his brethren was a lower life form and hence of little consequence.
Carter returned to the interface. ‘Crap’ she swore, ‘it didn’t work I’ll have to re-do the last two hours work’ she moaned. ‘What the hell did you people do to this thing?’ she asked rhetorically.
O’Neill got up off the floor. ‘I want you to listen carefully’ he told First. ‘We are not going to allow you people and your pets, if people is the right word, to chow down on the universe one galaxy at a time’ he said, confronting the Replicator who was also smug and condescending as well as evil making him very close to being a complete asshole as far as Jack O’Neill was concerned. ‘Even if this trap thing doesn’t pan out, even if you managed to kill me and all my people with me right here on this planet, you’re going to find out that the human race aren’t like the Asgard or any of the other folks you’ve steamrollered over the years’ he told the machine.
‘Really?’ First asked sarcastically, stepping closer in confrontation.
‘Yes really’ O’Neill confirmed, with no intention of backing down.
Carter looked at Fifth again she needed to take a longshot on gut instinct if they were going to get out of here. ‘They won’t believe you Sir unless we prove it to them’ she told O’Neill. ‘You say you can look into our minds, then take a look in mine’ she told Fifth.
‘Carter!’ O’Neill exclaimed.
‘It’s alright Sir, I think that this one is honest enough and wouldn’t hurt me more than was necessary’ Carter responded. ‘I don’t trust the others.’
‘Not happening Sam, you’re the only one that can fix that thing’ O’Neill pointed out.
‘I’m not sure that I can Sir’ Carter told him.
‘Then we nuke the place’ Ferretti declared, the other members of SG-2 nodding their agreement.
‘We kill a few of them but Earth will still have to reckon with billions more eventually’ Carter replied. ‘If we can prove to these jerks just how determined we are, just how different we are than the Asgard...’
‘Just how dumb we are’ O’Neill interrupted.
‘Yes Sir, that too’ Carter agreed with a smile. ‘Well then maybe they’ll leave us alone and look for some other galaxy to eat’ she said. ‘No tasty technology they don’t have but millions of human soldiers with projectile weapons and a gift for mayhem.’
‘Nice idea Carter but if it comes to that, Number Five that’s alive can take a look in my skull where he’s less likely to learn something useful’ O’Neill told her. ‘All I got is a lot of statistics on Ice Hockey.’
‘We don’t have to worry about Earth science falling into their hands Colonel, they’re already far beyond it’ Carter told him. ‘Okay Fifth, take a look, see how determined we are and tell your friends’ she told the Replicator.
‘Carter no’ O’Neill said with finality.
‘Trust me Sir’ Carter replied.
O’Neill narrowed his eyes. ‘Sergeant Andianov if that thing kills Major Carter blow his head off’ he ordered. ‘And one of his friends’ he added.
Fifth was surprised at the human females invitation to look into her mind but as she approached him he did likewise with an apologetic look. ‘This really will hurt a lot’ he warned her.
‘Just do it’ Carter told him sharply as he reached forward and slid his hand into her forehead, the pain a bright light of agony for an instant before she found herself in a strange place, a vast plain under an ever-changing sky made up of a kaleidoscope of colours, Fifth was stood there also before her and smiling. ‘I don’t know what you’re showing me but I’m pretty sure it’s not my subconscious mind’ she said.
‘No, Major Carter. It is mine’ Fifth replied. ‘We share much of our thought, in this way we are connected even with our Replicator brethren. But this corner of my mind is mine alone’ he continued. ‘It is the only place we could communicate without the others knowing what is said’ he told her.
‘You’re not like them’ Carter stated.
‘I’m a mistake’ Fifth replied as a statement of fact.
‘No, they are. A terrible mistake’ Carter replied earnestly. ‘Help us’ she implored him.
Fifth looked away. ‘I can’t’ he said.
‘You can. Because you’re more like us than you’re like them’ Carter told him. ‘The others inherited the same flaw that Reese had. But you…’
‘The others would destroy me’ Fifth interrupted her.
‘Not if you came with us’ Carter replied.
‘You would do that?’ Fifth asked in surprise.
‘We didn’t hurt Reese’ Carter reminded him. ‘You can come meet her’ she added enticingly, an invitation to meet the progenitor of your race should push the right buttons she thought.
‘Meet her?’ Fifth said.
‘She’ll like you’ Carter told him with a smile. ‘If you were to come with us, and the time dilation device was activated…’
‘They are my brothers and sisters’ Fifth reminded her. ‘The other woman with you already killed one of them and I grieve for her despite how they treat me’ he said.
‘The Asgard device was never designed to destroy the Replicators’ Carter told him. ‘For them, it would seem like a few days had passed. We’d have hundreds of years to solve their flaw’ she continued. ‘Harlan is already starting to understand more and more about how she works, we can make them all like you.’
Fifth thought about that and eventually nodded his assent. ‘What do you want me to do?’ he asked.
‘I was lying about the device, it’s ready, I just need to be able to activate it and get away’ Carter told him. ‘We have a force-field generator that will stop them disabling it again, it’ll generate a bubble for six feet around the device, but I need them to be distracted so I can set the timer on the time-dilation interface and activate the force-field’ she said. ‘Can you distract the others?’ she asked.
‘Yes, if I connect to them to transmit the information I gain from your mind’ Fifth replied. ‘You will have to give me free access to your memories, the more I take from you the longer it will take them to assimilate it’ he told her. ‘I will send everything at once, the volume of data will overwhelm them for a time’ he said.
‘Just don’t send them this conversation okay?’ Carter asked with a wry smile.
‘I’m not as foolish as they think I am’ Fifth replied, smiling back as he delved deeper into her mind, taking out the information he needed to distract the others. ‘I am much faster than you and can reach your ship very quickly, I will give you a head start in case I have to stop the others pursuing’ he told her.
‘Just don’t be too long, we’ll keep the ramp lowered as long as we can’ Carter advised before they broke contact.
O’Neill watched Carter nearly collapse as the Replicator pulled his hand back out of her head. ‘Carter’ he said loudly.
‘I’m okay Sir’ she replied groggily. ‘I’ll get back to work now’ she said, returning to the interface. ‘Hell of a migraine’ she added with a groan as she went back to the device.
‘Well Fifth?’ First asked.
‘It was a fascinating experience to share her mind’ Fifth replied. ‘Their subconscious is so disordered I will need a little while to get it straight and will then send you what I learned’ he told him.
First nodded, the notion that the inferior workings of their organic minds were chaotic fitted very well with his presumptions on the matter.
Carter shook her head to help clear it, she had thought sharing her mind with the Tok’ra Jolinar had been bad, or being telepathically attacked by a Sectoid for that matter, but the sheer difference of the Replicator intelligence was so strange. ‘I think I might need a component from the force-field generator’ she said, reaching for the unit Teal’c had carried here with him and set beside her earlier.
‘Don’t we need that to stop these guys screwing with the other gadget?’ O’Neill asked.
‘I’m doing my best Sir’ Carter responded, playing with it a while before returning to the Time-Dilation Interface. ‘Oh my head is killing me’ she complained. ‘I need to walk this off’ she said, getting up and stepping away from the interface.
She had barely stepped clear when the force-field generator activated, generating a bubble around both itself and the device. ‘Now Fifth!’ she told him as First and the others started to react.
‘What the hell!’ O’Neill exclaimed as they Replicators suddenly seemed to freeze.
‘Run Sir, explanations on the way’ Carter told him. ‘Fifth is coming with us, he’ll catch up’ she told him starting to run. ‘The Time-Dilation Device is on countdown.’
They had just cleared the temple, both teams running when O’Neill pressed the transmit button on his radio ‘Prometheus this is O’Neill, lift off now’ he ordered.
‘Sir?’ Carter queried in confusion as she watched the X-303 rise smoothly into the air raising the cargo ramp as it did.
‘Teleporters Carter’ O’Neill reminded her. The X-303 might not have fancy long-range Asgard Beaming but it still had the relatively low-tech but still effective matter-transmission system Earth had obtained from the Redemption aboard. They hadn’t used them earlier because it could be a one-shot deal, the Replicators would likely learn how to jam them very quickly and O’Neill had told Colonel Ronson that he would likely need a quick getaway.
Fifth reached the surface just in time to see the humans shimmer and vanish from sight as their ship began to disappear into the air. ‘No’ he said. ‘Take me too’ he yelled at it.
The others below were now beating on the forcefield, they would force their way through eventually but inside the device was counting down to zero. Fifth returned to his brothers and sisters as the time-dilation field activated, their expressions of disappointment and rage directed against him were the last thing he saw before time froze around them all.