I own neither Stargate nor the X-COM franchise. No infringement is intended, no profit is to be made and I'm just not worth the hassle of suing anyway unless you want a share of the wages of an underpaid Civil Servant.
Cheyenne Mountain – Earth – June 2002
Sitting forward in his chair, hands together on his desk General Hammond was clearly not in a good mood, in fact the expression on his face was such that O’Neill didn’t even attempt to make light of the situation, well not as much as usual anyhow. ‘Colonel are you intent on working your way through every archaeologist and linguist on the staff until we can’t find a single one that either you’ll work with, or will work with you?’ he asked flatly.
‘Hey, Captain Mathison only lasting two hours wasn’t my fault George’ O’Neill protested, and ‘Hagman being unconscious in the infirmary is entirely down to him not doing his job properly on P2X-374’ O’Neill defended himself.
‘And Doctor Lewis only the day before yesterday?’ Hammond asked.
‘Sergeant Andianov was the one that broke his jaw Sir and for one I don’t buy his story that he only put his hand there to help her up that slope either’ O’Neill replied. ‘And she was professional enough to only deck him when we got back to the SGC so I thought not putting her up on a charge was the right thing to do’ he said. Watching Lewis hit the ramp in a heap barely two seconds after stepping out the gate had been pretty entertaining to watch in any case, he did have a creepy vibe about him, Carter mentioned it too.
Hammond began drumming his fingers on his desk. ‘Given the number of personnel already reluctant in the extreme to join SG-1 because they know how many missions you’ve undertaken which by rights you should never have returned alive from I’ve got to tell you Colonel you’re this close to getting assigned another member of X-COM because they’re the only ones crazy or masochistic enough to do it’ he said.
O’Neill groaned. ‘Couldn’t I give Major Pressman another go?’ he asked. ‘Doctor Fraser says the limp is only temporary and...’
‘The Major seems less than keen for a reprise’ Hammond interrupted.
‘Really?’ O’Neill asked in surprise. ‘I thought we all hit it off pretty well, I mean even Teal’c swapped a couple of sentences with him and that’s unheard of for a new guy because he’s been my friend for years and we can still go weeks without...’
‘I sincerely doubt that Major Pressman would be interested in undertaking another mission with SG-1’ Hammond interrupted again.
‘Two measly firefights and they up and quit on you’ Colonel O’Neill complained.
‘Within the space of a single four hour mission to a supposedly deserted planet’ Hammond pointed out, ‘and it was three firefights according to the mission reports’ he noted.
‘I didn’t count the third one because they barely got a shot off before Teal’c and Andianov flanked them and they ran off’ O’Neill responded. ‘I guess they just don’t make Jaffa like they used to’ he added. ‘I think we’ve already killed off a lot of the really brave or really dumb ones’ he reasoned.
‘Face it Colonel, for whatever reason SG-1 is a trouble magnet and that’s just not attractive to a fair percentage of our staff’ Hammond told him.
‘Anybody that wouldn’t want to come along with us and do what we do is whacked’ O’Neill declared with sincerity. It was the greatest job in the world, he thought, visiting other worlds, learning from ancient and wise cultures, encountering advanced civilisations and when that got dull, which it tended to pretty quick, there was always the shooting at people who really deserved to be shot at which never got old and gave you a warm glow of job satisfaction every day.
General Hammond sat back in his chair. ‘Jack we both know that the problem is you’re trying to replace Doctor Jackson...’
‘There is no “replacing” Daniel’ O’Neill interrupted, he figured it was his turn. ‘I’m filling a spot on the team and if I have to have a socio-political nerd along I need someone that I think can do the job well enough not to interfere too much with our overwhelming coolness’ he said.
‘I’m perfectly willing to assign someone to you and not take no for an answer if it comes to that’ Hammond told him. ‘Neither you nor they having any choice in the matter’ he added. ‘I’ll give you a week to find your own number five and after that you take what you’re given’ he said with finality.
O’Neill sighed. ‘Maybe I could put up a recruiting poster in the canteen, poach someone halfway decent from another team... that guy Ferretti recruited for his new crew now he’s back in the game bossing SG-2 sounded okay.’
‘Somehow I don’t think Lieutenant-Colonel Ferretti will be too happy about that... so if it happens I knew nothing about it whatsoever in advance’ Hammond told him. It would be a great deal easier to put someone new on SG-2 than find someone else for SG-1 if it panned out that way.
‘You knew nothing about what Sir?’ O’Neill asked in mock confusion.
‘Perfect’ Hammond told him. ‘Did you finish reading the latest intelligence updates about the fall-out from Maybourne’s little hustle?’ he asked, changing the subject.
‘Not only did I read it, I re-read it Sir’ O’Neill replied. ‘Laughed all the way through lunch’ he said.
‘I thought somehow you’d appreciate it’ Hammond told him with a chuckle.
‘We got the Asgard, and kept the Amulet, Apophis and Anubis both lost ships and we think Yu flattened half of Ba’als main research base before he realised he was bombing an ally’ O’Neill recalled happily. ‘Even better Anubis thinks Ba’al was involved because he’s such an infamously scheming bastard so those two aren’t on good terms any more’ he continued. ‘Ba’al thinks it must have been all down to the Tok’ra, because he underestimates us but he knows those guys are sneaky, so we’ve driven a wedge in there too’ he said, ‘which I like because Ba’al and the Tok’ra were getting to friendly for my liking’ he said then looked thoughtful. ‘I think Maybourne might be touched by genius somehow, if he goes over to the other side we need a contingency plan to assassinate him straight away before he sets himself up as a new System Lord with Earth as his capital’ he said. ‘He’s already got the sycophantic slave-girl to fit the super-villain persona’ O’Neill noted.
‘I’m still not completely convinced I did the right thing letting her go with him when he returned to his day job’ Hammond remarked.
‘Hey everyone tried to talk her out of it, even Maybourne, but she just wanted to stick with the devious SOB’ O’Neill replied. ‘The worst thing is now she knows he’s really a secret agent working against the Goa’uld she thinks he’s cool and heroic too’ he said. ‘You know if the SGC went public I’m sure a couple of single guys like us would be up to our eyes in hero-worshipping females’ he said wistfully.
‘It never occurred’ Hammond told him, not exactly truthfully, they might all him the old man but he wasn’t that old. ‘It’s a shame Thor was in a coma, the Asgard think Anubis must have used some new technology to rip information from his mind’ the General observed sadly.
‘Hack’ O’Neill responded with a snort, ‘our guys rip information out of alien’s minds all the time and we don’t end up turning them into vegetables’ he declared. ‘Yeah it’s a real pity about Thor’ he agreed wholeheartedly, ‘I always liked that little guy’ he continued, ‘a lot more than most people I’ve ever known to be honest, human people I mean’ he said. It was surprising somehow but although they were a race of physically identical clones the Asgard had such a wide range of different personalities. Thor was pretty cool in his opinion, Heimdall had a peppy enthusiasm that made her likeable, Freyr was kinda an officious jerk but no more than a lot of political types tended to be and Loki was a ruthless, evil asshole which made him no worse than the worse humanity had to show for itself. ‘I hope the Asgard can fix him up, they’ve got some kick-ass medical technology’ he stated from experience. ‘I once saw them bring you back to life after a Jaffa hit you twice with a Zat’ he said. ‘Parallel universe’ he explained.
‘I’ve formally passed on our wishes to the Asgard High Council for Thor to make a speedy recovery and offered any help we might be able to offer’ Hammond told him, ‘not that I think that’s likely given how much more advanced they are than us’ he said. ‘The Tok’ra say they’ve no idea what Anubis might have used, it goes way beyond any mind-interface technology the Goa’uld have ever had before.’
‘Where does he get those wonderful toys?’ O’Neill asked rhetorically. ‘If he’s got himself some Asgard gadgets now too we could be in serious trouble if he starts looking in our direction’ he said.
‘Commander Sharp and myself thought the same thing which is why as soon as we can get in contact with all our off-world strike teams we’re ending operations against Apophis’ Hammond told him.
O’Neill grinned. ‘Without us screwing with his supply lines he can get his logistics running properly again, thin out his garrisons and send them back to the front line and...’
‘Give Anubis something more important to deal with than us’ Hammond finished the sentence. ‘My idea’ he added.
‘And it’s a good one George’ O’Neill told his superior. ‘It’ll be a dark day when we’re at the top of the hit list as opposed to being an irritating pain in the ass’ he said. ‘So does this mean we get to hit any Goa’uld we want again?’ he asked hopefully. ‘Targets of opportunity, no more unfairly picking on poor old Apophis?’
‘That’s the plan’ Hammond told him.
‘Great because hitting Serpent Guards and Sokar’s old boys has been getting samey’ O’Neill replied. ‘There’s a whole lot of System Lords and pissant minor Goa’ulds that still haven’t had the pleasure of meeting us properly’ he said. ‘I think Ba’al deserves a visit, he’s been getting off light till now and maybe we should introduce Anubis to some of our new technology as well’ O’Neill declared.
‘The Tok’ra still regard Apophis as the major threat given his continued superiority in shipbuilding’ Hammond told him. ‘They may not agree with our change in targets so we might lose the use of their cloaked Tel’tacs for sabotage and hit and run raids’ he said.
‘It was fun while it lasted I guess, and we do still have that bucket of bolts they sold us if we ever need a cloaked ship for a special mission’ O’Neill replied with a shrug. ‘We’ve always worked to our own agendas, they’ve just coincided for a while but it’s not like I expected it to last forever.’
‘I know you’ve always had a few reservations regarding the Tok’ra but we’re still allies Colonel’ Hammond reminded him.
‘Yeah, but I like it now we’re allies on much more even terms Sir’ O’Neill responded. ‘It’s the getting talked down to that grated you know?’
‘I know exactly how you feel Colonel’ Hammond agreed. ‘At least these days people like the Tok’ra and the Tollan take us more seriously’ he said. ‘It makes negotiating with them a lot more pleasant when they aren’t being condescending... or less condescending.’
‘General, I look forward to the day when we get to spend an entire meeting patronising the crap out of them’ O’Neill told him.
‘Son, that thought keeps staving off my retirement for another year’ Hammond replied.
Yamantau – Russia – July 2002
Jonas Quinn looked around. ‘So is there only one architect that designs secret underground military bases on this entire planet?’ he asked quizzically looking around.
Carter smiled. ‘Military functionality’ she said. ‘Area 51, Yamantau, Cheyenne Mountain, any of the X-COM bases, they’re all just concrete, steel doors and exposed piping and airducts’ she told him. ‘I prefer our colour scheme to this habit the Russians have of painting everything the same shade of green though’ she added as they stepped off the Aschen Transporter platform which had zipped them from the SGC to the Russian Military facility under the Ural Mountains via a short stopover in the X-COM Base in Poland.
‘Colonel Carter?’ a young woman wearing a Russian military uniform greeted them. ‘I am Lieutenant Tolinev’ she introduced herself. ‘If you would please accompany me to the main hanger Doctor McKay is waiting for your arrival’ she said, leading off.
‘I hope nobody waited for us Lieutenant’ Carter replied, following on.
‘From what I could tell Doctor McKay seemed more concerned about impressing you than he did any of the other personnel, including several senior officers who travelled from Moscow especially to see the project yesterday, Colonel’ Tolinev replied.
‘So is there a history here I don’t know about’ Jonas asked Sam.
‘If there is it exists solely in McKay’s twisted imagination, and that’s something I just don’t want to think about for a second’ Carter replied.
Fortunately the platform at Yamantau wasn’t too far away from the laboratories and underground aircraft hangers and walking at a brisk pace they soon arrived. ‘Samantha’ a woman greeted them warmly just inside the door leading to a cavernous underground chamber.
‘Doctor Markov’ Carter responded with a smile as Tolinev handed them over to the scientist and headed off.
‘As I have told you before, call me Svetlana, please’ the Russian physicist told her. ‘And this must be Jonas Quinn who provided the naquadriah correct?’ she asked.
‘It is’ Carter confirmed. ‘Jonas meet Doctor Svetlana Markov, the senior X-COM Scientist based at this facility’ she told him.
‘It’s a pleasure’ Jonas told her. ‘I read a few of your papers, very impressive’ he said. ‘Of course I had to read a large number of physics textbooks first before I could understand any of them but from what I could keep up with Samantha’s description of you to me earlier as “brilliant” was extremely apt’ he said.
‘Physics texts?’ Markov queried.
‘Kelowna where Jonas comes from is a few decades behind us in theoretical physics’ Carter explained. ‘The rate at which he got up to speed is frankly frightening’ she continued. ‘He’s also read almost all of our old mission reports and I think he memorised practically all of Daniels old notebooks.’
‘I’m a quick study’ Jonas told her, as if the feat wasn’t much to speak of.
‘Yes but unfortunately we can’t all be hok’taur Mr Quinn’ Markov told him, ‘I’ve read the file X-COM have on you, your tested Psionic scores were highly impressive’ she added.
‘Not impressive enough to prevent a teenage girl making me involuntarily sing Kelownan folk songs apparently’ Jonas replied wryly.
‘Cassie does that to everyone with good scores’ Carter told him, ‘teaches them humility’ she said, and she gets a kick out of it Sam knew.
‘Plus Commander Sharp wanted to make sure I knew that if I ever got hold of a Psi-Amp and tried mind-controlling anyone for nefarious reasons I’d be slapped down’ Jonas replied knowingly. ‘I realise I’m not fully trusted yet’ he said. ‘Colonel O’Neill made that abundantly clear by his refusal to even contemplate me joining SG-1.’
‘Well you are an alien’ Carter pointed out. ‘And if it helps your ego Cassie said she never had to put in so much effort to control someone before’ she continued.
‘Teal’c is an alien too, and he’s on the team already’ Jonas replied, ‘and so is the very same Cassandra Fraser who you trust to keep me in line’ he noted.
‘Trust is earned and at least those examples prove there’s hope’ Carter replied. ‘Just remember that it’s not like we keep a gun on you 24/7 like we do Nirrti.’
Jonas grimaced. ‘That woman, if woman is the right word, makes me extremely... uncomfortable’ he admitted. She had clearly been trying to seduce, or “vamp” him as the locals said, for her own ends and it was disturbing in the extreme.
‘I think of the female alien scientists working alongside us on occasion most men seem to prefer the company of the Tok’ra Anise’ Markov observed. ‘I cannot think why’ she asked in feigned ignorance.
‘Complete mystery’ Carter replied trying to keep a straight face.
‘Hey are you going to stand over there all day gossiping or are you going to come look at this new hyperspace window generator’ an annoyed and familiar voice yelled out to them.
‘We will be there presently Doctor McKay’ Markov called back to where he was standing next to an F-302X Grim Reaper in the centre of the hanger. ‘He is very rude’ she noted, ‘many of the staff have refused to work with him ever again after a few days of doing so’ she continued. ‘He also does not share credit even when it is due, Doctor Murphy contributed much to the research, as did Doctor Novak before she was transferred to the Prometheus project’ she noted.
Carter shrugged. ‘Unfortunately for all his failings as a human being he really is almost as smart as he thinks he is’ she said, ‘which makes him too valuable not to have working for us’ she said.
‘His contribution on the incorporation of naquadriah into our existing hyperdrive designs has been invaluable I must reluctantly admit’ Markov conceded. ‘It has enabled us to design a drive based largely upon that carried by a Tel’tak but small enough to fit on an F-302’ she said. ‘The tactical advantage this offers our pilots is immense as you know.’
Carter nodded. ‘We can’t risk the Enterprise in combat with other Ha’tak ships, it’s too valuable an asset, but if it can simply drop out of hyperspace outside a target solar system and launch squadrons of Faster-Than-Light capable fighters in strike missions against high-value targets we could cause massive damage to Goa’uld facilities.’
‘I have heard suggestions of Pearl Harbour style carrier attacks against enemy shipyards being mooted’ Markov replied.
Carter chuckled. ‘We might use another historical example ourselves in the U.S.’ she said.
‘I’m very grateful to get the chance to accompany you here to see the new hyperdrive design’ Jonas told them. ‘I don’t get out too much for one thing’ he continued. ‘Could I get a chance to get up on the surface?’ he asked. ‘I checked the weather forecast for the region and it’s good for the next five hours’ he said.
‘Both General Hammond and Commander Sharp said we should give you access to any naquadriah related research’ Carter replied. ‘And out of interest do you ever tune your TV to anything but the Weather Channel?’ she asked with amusement.
‘It’s fantastic’ Jonas enthused. ‘All of your weather from all over your planet right there. Even a long-range forecast. It's like… predicting the future’ he said.
‘You should come back to Russia in the winter’ Markov told him. ‘We will show you weather worthy of the name’ she said.
‘Cool’ Jonas replied brightly.
‘Very’ Markov told him as they went to join the impatient McKay.
Lieutenant Tolinev ran back into the hanger. ‘Colonel Carter you have been called back to the SGC’ she said. ‘Doctor McKay also’ she continued. ‘There is a problem with the stargate’ she told them.
‘Darn’ Carter responded. ‘Did they say what the problem was?’ she asked.
‘There is an incoming wormhole from an unknown location which has not deactivated after the usual thirty-eight minutes and General Hammond wishes your analysis of the situation’ Tolinev replied.
‘I thought that keeping a wormhole open longer than thirty-eight minutes was impossible’ Jonas asked in confusion.
‘No, it just requires a staggering amount of energy’ Carter replied. ‘The Tollan gave us the equations that filled in most of the gaps we had in understanding wormhole physics’ she said. ‘They made my head hurt’ she admitted. The Tollan were centuries ahead of Earth, they were actually at the scientific stage not only of having a Unified Field Theory that explained Quantum and Relativistic effects simultaneously but they had practical applications of that theory such as the power-source that Tau’ri engineers called the UFT Generator, not that that they understood remotely how it worked beyond the level of knowing it put out a truly phenomenal amount of energy. A misused UFT Generator had pretty much shattered the planet Serita in the original Tollan home system, a feat which would require thousands of tons of weapons-grade naquadah at the very least to replicate. ‘McKay we need to get to the SGC’ she called out.
‘But I was going to let you look over my equations’ McKay told her, he knew she’d be impressed assuming she could follow them.
‘I can correct your math later’ Carter responded, earning a scowl. ‘There’s an incoming wormhole which has been active over thirty-eight minutes’ she told him.
McKay looked at the hyperdrive, it could wait he decided, this sounded like something interesting, something that required proper investigation and the keenest mind on Earth to look into. Carter would make a damn fine eye-candy lab assistant while he worked it out too.
‘If you keep him there’s a bottle of vodka in it for you’ Markov told Carter seriously.
Lieutenant Tolinev left eye twitched. ‘I have just been told I am getting re-assigned shortly to X-COM at the SGC’ she said. ‘I will give you two bottles to ensure he is sent back here Colonel’ she counter-offered.
‘You know somewhere in the universe there has got to be a place for McKay’ Carter observed thoughtfully.
‘With stargates and hyperdrive, anywhere in this galaxy would be insufficiently distant for my liking’ Markov told her.
Cheyenne Mountain – Earth – June 2002
Carter looked down at the stargate again before turning back to the senior staff. ‘We’ve checked the results three times and it’s definitely not a glitch’ she said. ‘The energy build-up is so incredibly gradual, we had to increase the sensitivity of our monitoring equipment two-hundred percent to even register it’ she told them, ‘but over time it’s incrementally building to a level which the gate won’t be able to hold.’
McKay nodded. ‘A stargate is basically a giant superconductor that stores charge like a capacitor and releases it to create a wormhole’ he explained. ‘It can hold a huge amount of charge but eventually it’s absorbed all it can take and once it’s reached its limit...’
‘We estimate an explosion of two to three thousand megatons in yield’ Carter interrupted him.
‘Think ten to fifteen times the yield of the Krakatoa eruption in 1883 which blew the island to pieces’ McKay told them. ‘It’ll basically take out the whole of Colorado and effects will be global, the ash Krakotoa threw up into the atmosphere depressed temperatures world-wide for the next five years and that was a lot smaller than this is going to be.’
‘Nuclear winter’ General Hammond replied.
‘Oh yeah’ McKay confirmed. ‘Of course the localised damage to the North American continent will be more severe’ he noted.
‘How long have we got?’ Commander Sharp asked.
‘Well we’re talking days not hours fortunately because so far we’ve got no idea how to stop it Sir’ Carter replied.
‘Days?’ Colonel O’Neill queried.
‘The build-up to overload is incredibly incremental’ Carter told him. ‘Guessing this whole thing is deliberate we don’t know if that’s because this is as fast as it can be done or it’s just someone’s idea of prolonging the agony’ she said.
‘Guessing this is the work of some Goa’uld I wouldn’t bet against the latter’ O’Neill observed.
‘Any we can’t tell where it’s coming from?’ Sharp asked.
‘Sorry Sir, we don’t have Caller ID on the gate or anything’ Carter reminded him.
Sharp crossed his arms. ‘With a couple of days to work with we could probably get a ship there and show them some megatonnage of our own’ he growled.
‘You know this sounds like a job for our oh-so-advanced allies to me’ O’Neill observed.
Carter shrugged. ‘Anise is going to ring down from the Enterprise but she says she’s never heard of any piece of Goa’uld technology that can do something like this so she’s not sure if she can help at all’ she said. ‘Heimdall says she thinks she knows how someone might be doing it, and is trying to think up a way to delay the explosion by drawing some of the excess power off the gate as an interim measure, but it might take a while to put something together.’
‘Anyone talked to the Tollan?’ Sharp asked.
‘Yes, we signalled them and requested if they couldn’t help could they talk to the Nox in case they can’ Carter replied. ‘But to be honest if the Asgard don’t have an immediate solution then we shouldn’t get our hopes up for them to either’ she said.
The lights dimmed and several alarms starting going off. ‘We’re experiencing widespread loss of power Sir’ Harriman reported, looking at his screen.
‘First too much power then not enough’ O’Neill responded, ‘you know if we could find a way to merge these two problems we’d be sweet’ he said.
‘We’ve got company’ Sharp said, pointing out into the gate room as a slightly transparent image formed on the ramp.
‘I am Anubis’ the figure began to speak with enough volume and the right tones to reverberate.
‘It looks like a holographic projection’ Carter opined. ‘This is Asgard technology. He must have downloaded it from Thor’ she said.
‘Well thank you Captain obvious’ McKay responded, rolling his eyes.
‘At least get my rank right, that’s Major obvious’ Carter corrected him
‘Humans of the Tau’ri, I am aware of your deception’ the image of Anubis stated. ‘You will hand over both the Eye of Tiamat and your prisoner Osiris or face your doom’ it commanded. ‘There is nothing that can stop the destruction I bring upon you’ it declared with certainty.
‘Oh come on... who talks like that?’ O’Neill asked sardonically.
‘The Tok’ra said Anubis had a reputation for being melodramatic even by System Lord standards’ General Hammond observed.
‘And I thought Apophis and his camp Ming the Merciless act was bad’ O’Neill commented. ‘This guy raises the bar for clichés’ he declared.
‘Can he hear us?’ Sharp asked.
‘We can open a channel on a Goa’uld frequency, transmit a reply’ Carter responded.
‘Go ahead please Major’ Sharp requested.
‘Done’ Carter told him after punching a few keys.
‘This is Commander Russell Sharp am I addressing the Goa’uld System Lord Anubis?’ Sharp asked, leaning into the microphone in front of him.
‘You are’ the hologram confirmed. ‘You will learn to bow before my awesome power or face annihilation’ it added.
‘This guy really digs his own act’ O’Neill whispered. ‘Do you think he practices the super-villain speech in the mirror before show-time?’ he pondered. ‘Make sure he’s stressing the right words?’
Sharp raised a hand to shut O’Neill up. ‘We don’t have the Eye of Tiamat, Apophis stole it’ he said into the microphone.
‘I am all knowing’ the hologram declared, ‘I saw through your simple ruse, how could you think to trick a god?’ it asked.
Sharp turned to General Hammond who shrugged. ‘Took you long enough to work out, doesn’t exactly meet my definition of omniscience’ Sharp told Anubis with some amusement.
‘Your chappa’ai is in my hands’ Anubis responded, reaching out a clenched fist like he meant it literally, ‘agree to my terms or I will destroy it and you with it’ the holographic image of the System Lord vowed.
‘I’m sorry you seem to have mistaken me for someone who takes you seriously’ Commander Sharp replied sarcastically.
The image of Anubis leaned its head to one side. ‘Your pathetic bluster means nothing, I know that your people yielded to Sokar when threatened such as this’ the hologram said. ‘As you once handed Apophis over to him you will do the same with what I demand.’
‘Yeah well the days of giving into guys that think the cowl is a good look are over’ Sharp told him. ‘No offence George’ he said to Hammond.
‘Your insolence and bravado is nothing but a mask for your hopelessness’ Anubis declared. ‘I will return in a day when your deaths are closer at hand and your leaders are ready to bow to their god and then I will decide if I want your head also’ he said, the hologram vanishing and the lighting coming back on.
‘Do you think he’d accept the Commander’s head as a deposit on the other stuff?’ O’Neill asked. ‘Just spitballing here Sir’ he added as Sharp directed a glare his way. ‘I mean we could try and make it sound like a good deal’ he continued, ‘you know, low mileage, original hair...’
‘We could throw in the Colonel’s head as a bonus, we know the Goa’uld put a price on it’ General Hammond suggested deadpan.
‘Let’s make that Plan D’ O’Neill responded. ‘Carter I think the Commander and I would really like Plan’s A to C on the table in the next few hours’ he said, Sharp nodding his wholehearted agreement. ‘You know when we were linked to the black hole we broke the connection with a shaped-charge’ O’Neill suggested.
‘That was an outgoing wormhole not incoming’ Carter replied. ‘Things work very differently depending on whether you’re the sending or receiving gate’ she reminded them.
McKay nodded. ‘This Anubis, he has a real flair for the dramatic, doesn't he? Very theatrical’ he observed.
‘Yeah. Pretty much all the Goa'uld are like that’ Carter responded.
‘But, why wait so long before appearing?’ McKay asked.
‘I don't know. Maybe he wanted to make sure it was gonna work’ Carter suggested.
‘Yeah, that would be embarrassing, wouldn't it?’ McKay agreed. ‘He’s all “Nothing can stop the destruction that I bring upon you!" Then the Gate shuts down.’
‘Maybe it’s new technology, or old technology he’s unfamiliar with’ Carter observed. ‘Heimdall said she thought this entire thing reeked of the Ancients, we know from the Tok’ra that most Goa’uld technology is based upon their back-engineering of Ancient artefacts.’
‘There’s a thought’ O’Neill said. ‘Anubis has been pulling a lot of funky new tricks out of his ass ever since he showed up’ he said. ‘What if he found an old Ancient Outpost or something?’
‘And he disappeared for a few centuries because he was back-engineering what he found’ Carter responded. ‘It’s not a bad theory, maybe all he’s really been doing is getting Goa’uld equipment closer to their original Ancient specs.’
‘Holds some water as a theory but it doesn’t help us too much right now’ Commander Sharp interrupted.
McKay clicked his fingers. ‘I’ve got an idea’ he announced. ‘It was you replying to Anubis over the radio that got me thinking’ he told Sharp. ‘We know that for certain kinds of energy or forces a wormhole is two-way’ he said.
‘Right, like radio or... gravity’ O'Neill replied.
‘We could send a massive EM Pulse back through the wormhole and try and disrupt the mechanism on the other side that’s doing this’ McKay suggested.
‘Would that work?’ Hammond asked.
‘No, Sir. I already thought of it, and the reason I didn't mention it is because it is far too problematic’ Carter told him. ‘The Iris would have to be opened and we have absolutely no idea how much EM would be required to knock this thing out.’
‘Have you got a better idea?’ McKay asked. ‘I could get an EM Pulse Generator set up in less than four hours.’
‘If we open the iris we’re cutting the amount of time we have until the gate explodes for something we don’t know will work’ Carter told the group. ‘At the moment the iris is absorbing some of the incoming energy which is one reason it’s only a trickle getting through to the stargate.’
‘Feel free to come up with a better idea but until then I’m going with the one we’ve got’ Commander Sharp said.
‘Sir not every problem can be solved by blasting it with...’ Carter started to reply then stopped. ‘But maybe this one can’ she said.
‘This is what I call a Carter brainstorm moment’ O’Neill remarked. ‘You get used to them after a while.’
‘The electromagnetic spectrum’ Carter said. ‘It starts with long wavelengths, radio, and as the wavelengths get shorter you get microwaves, Infra Red, visible light, UV, X-Ray’s then finally Gamma Radiation’ she said.
‘Major even I know that with my “low mileage” head’ Sharp replied. ‘No need to dumb it down too far’ he advised.
‘Sorry Commander’ Carter apologised. ‘Well we know that the longest wavelengths travel through the wormhole in both directions or we couldn’t communicate by radio’ she said. ‘And we know from connecting to worlds where the stargate is in a radioactive region that gamma rays at the other end of the spectrum can come through as well so it’s not just the longest EM wavelengths that can do it.’
‘Stargate physics 101’ McKay interjected. ‘We know the gate doesn’t let visible light in the middle of the spectrum through because... well it’s pretty obvious because you can’t see through the event horizon’ he said.
‘Right’ Carter agreed, but what that means is that there should be two points, high and low, probably in the microwave and X-Ray parts of the spectrum where EM radiation isn’t being blocked any more’ she said.
‘The X-COM Laser Cannons’ McKay realised, slapping himself on the side of the head. ‘They’re FEL’s.’
‘They’re what?’ O’Neill asked.
‘Free Electron Lasers’ Carter explained. ‘It uses a relativistic electron beam as the lasing medium’ she said.
‘Maybe a little more dumbed-down than that’ Sharp requested, O’Neill nodding his agreement.
‘It doesn’t really matter’ Carter told him. ‘What it means is that unlike gas, liquid or solid-state lasers a Free-Electron Laser can be tuned, you can get them to output a beam from the microwave frequencies all the way up to soft X-Rays’ she explained. ‘We use them in the visible spectrum but with some adjustment they don’t have to Lase in that band’ she said.
‘We run a cannon at the shortest and longest frequencies we can get it to produce and hopefully one of those will be short or long enough to work’ McKay said.
‘It’s a pity we can’t get one of the big Base Defence Lasers down here’ Carter said. ‘Hook up a couple of naquadah generators and the biggest capacitors we can get and after testing the frequency with a lower-powered beam to make sure it’ll work throw all the wattage we possibly can back at them.’
‘Why can’t we get one of those down here?’ O’neill asked.
‘They’re huge Sir, they’d never fit down the corridor even if we could get them down the lift shaft’ she said. ‘A Laser Cannon from an F-302 should be doable though’ Carter replied.
A cough from the back of the room caused everyone to turn finding Jonas standing there with a cup of coffee. ‘Sorry to interrupt but there’s something I’ve been meaning to ask since I got here and this seems like the time’ he said. ‘How did you get the stargate in here to begin with?’ he asked. ‘It’s bigger than the corridors too’ he noted.
Carter blinked. ‘Above it is a shaft that leads to the surface, and inside is a crane mechanism that hoisted the Gate down’ she replied. ‘Jonas you’re a genius’ she added wondering how long he'd been listening. When not reading he pretty much roamed about the base talking to people, mainly about the weather, and drinking coffee which was starting to turn into a major caffeine addiction to be honest.
‘Wouldn’t Anubis have thought of something like this?’ Hammond asked.
‘Goa’uld, Asgard, Tollan, Sectoid... everyone uses plasma-based weaponry but us Sir, and plasma won’t go the wrong way down a gate so they'd never think of return fire, if plasma did work in both directions I’d fire a Zat-Cannon through instead’ Carter replied. ‘If the beam doesn’t work we can always try Plan B and fire McKay’s EM Pulse straight away.’
‘Take any personnel you need from any project and get this done ASAP’ Sharp ordered. ‘You have my authority to pull engineers and equipment from every facility we have around the world Colonel.’
‘Yes Sir’ Carter replied.
‘And someone contact every intel source we have out there and find out what fucking planet Anubis is firing at us from’ Sharp ordered loudly. ‘Walter get the Redemption loaded with the biggest warheads we’ve got, there should be a few nice big ones on Enterprise they can beam over’ Sharp told him. ‘I feel a field-trip coming on’ he said.
‘Plan C?’ Hammond queried.
‘It’s only fair seeing as how Anubis is threatening this planet with nuclear winter’ Sharp replied. ‘And I don’t feel like sitting around here waiting for Plan D to sound good to someone’ he added.