I own neither Stargate nor the X-COM franchise. No infringement is intended, no profit is to made and I'm just not worth the hassle of suing anyway unless you want a share of the wages of an underpaid Civil Servant.
Cheyenne Mountain – Earth – June 2001
O’Neill looked from Weir to Sharp. ‘I don’t know which one of them looks more pleased with themselves’ he whispered to Carter sat next to him in the canteen which was being temporarily used as a lecture hall as Hammond handed over the briefing to Weir. The room was full of SGC personnel as the senior staff updated the whole base as to the current state of the war.
Elizabeth Weir looked around and smiled. ‘As you know after a lengthy negotiation the Tollan have agreed to trade Stargate for Hyperdrive technology’ she began. ‘Furthermore we have been given permission to set up a permanent Embassy on Tollana and have been offered a small pre-existing government owned building for the purpose.’
‘They didn’t want us bringing in our own engineers to put one up’ General Hammond remarked. ‘Something about building codes’ he explained.
Weir nodded. ‘The Tollan seemed to think that with our level of technology anything we built would fall down the next time it got windy’ she said, causing a ripple of laughter to run through the canteen as she rolled her eyes for effect. ‘In any case I’ll be taking the job as Ambassador to Tollana on a temporary basis while a permanent appointee is found’ she announced.
‘We’ve got our foot in the door now’ Hammond observed. ‘SGC Personnel both military and civilian will be rotated through the Embassy and I expect you all to make sure to leave a good impression on our hosts’ he said. ‘You will be polite, civilised and try to look as “advanced” as possible at all times.’
‘You know that could be harder for some than others’ O’Neill couldn’t resist responding, ‘I mean some of us look more evolved and eat less raw meat’ he noted, pointedly grinning at Colonel Reynolds the commanding officer of the SG-3 Marines who muttered something about the “Air Farce” in return.
‘Who gets the job of Military Attaché?’ Colonel Barnes from SG-6 asked.
‘Yet to be decided, are you after the job Colonel? General Hammond queried.
‘No Sir’ Barnes replied vehemently.
‘Dodged a bullet there’ O’Neill told the other USAF Colonel. ‘Never volunteer or sound like you’re volunteering’ he advised sagely, earning a chastened nod from Barnes.
‘Commander Sharp’ Weir said, turning over the briefing to the X-COM officer who stood up from the chair he’d been sat in.
‘Okay’ Sharp began, ‘as you know more and more System Lord’s have joined the coalition against Apophis which has ground his offensive to a temporary halt as he’s forced to re-deploy his forces to meet some nicely carried out counter-attacks’ he said. ‘A joint armada of Hat’ak vessels from the fleets of Kali, Bastet and Amaterasu crashed into his flank two weeks ago while he tried to knock Lord Yu out of the fight and the bastard then had to retreat straight away because unfortunately for him our Tok’ra friends had clandestinely informed Kali what planets his supply lines were routed through’ he continued with a smirk. ‘Lord Yu then took the opportunity to take advantage of the situation and retook several strategic worlds he’d lost to Apophis, it’s only a temporary reversal but I think you’ll agree any bad news for Apophis is worth celebrating’ he said.
‘Are we going to deal ourselves into this Sir?’ a Captain from SG-7 asked.
‘Oh hell yeah’ Sharp replied with a grin. ‘The Tok’ra are sending a pair of Tel’tak’s with cloaks to the Alpha site where they’re going to pick up four teams I’m assigning to the mission later today’ he said. ‘We’re going to ride through Apophis space like the Mongol Horde and blow up everything we can with some handy new demolition charges Major Carter can tell you about.’
Carter stood up. ‘The charges are actually an elerium-based sectoid manufactured grenade contained in a thin weapons-grade naquadah jacket we added’ she explained. ‘They’re about the same size and weight of a tin of beans and have an explosive yield of approximately one and a half kilotons of TNT’ she told them. ‘That should be sufficient to destroy or at least cripple most unshielded targets’ she said.
‘We’ve got crates full of them just ready to go’ Sharp announced enthusiastically. ‘We’ll shoot everything that moves and blow up everything that doesn’t’ he declared. ‘Apophis will have to strip his offensive forces to garrison every logistically important world he has, he’s got the ships to fight all the other System Lord’s but he doesn’t have the manpower to match so being forced to do that will hurt.’
‘What if we run into a large existing garrison?’ another officer queried. ‘The Tok’ra can’t have perfect intelligence there’s not enough of them to keep tabs on every world Apophis has.’
‘We’ve got a target list we’re pretty sure of’ Sharp replied, ‘but nothing is for certain’ he admitted.
‘Sounds like fun’ O’Neill said.
‘Indeed’ Teal’c agreed, Daniel looking at both of them like they were insane.
‘So what about the teams not assigned?’ Colonel Reynolds asked.
‘The worlds the cloaked Tel’taks are going to hit were chosen because they have decent gate defences, some may even have a force-field Iris’ Sharp replied. ‘There are other planets which are easier to attack via the stargate so don’t think that anyone getting left behind isn’t going to be in on the fun, we’ve got a second-tier of targets with minimal gate defences that are worth hitting too and we will be hitting them in concert with our Free Jaffa allies’ he said then walked over to retrieve an object which had been lying on a table under a cloth.
‘What the hell is that monstrosity?’ someone asked as Sharp revealed the device.
‘We’re calling it a “Staff-Rifle”, or at least we’re going to try and get the Free Jaffa to call it that and not something full of apostrophes’ Commander Sharp replied to some laughter. ‘Basically all we’ve done is taken a Staff-Weapon, removed the counterweight club and two feet of the staff length and added a metal stock, a handgrip, some iron sights and a trigger in the right place’ he said. ‘Guess what’ he continued, ‘you can actually hit something when you fire the thing now’ he joked provoking laughter from the room. The ergonomics of the standard Jaffa weapon were truly abysmal.
‘We are delivering the first batch to the Free Jaffa Resistance tomorrow’ Teal’c announced, ‘I expect my people to be resistant to using them until they witness their greater military effectiveness’ he said.
‘They’re still nowhere near as good as a L2A2, or even a conventional rifle’ Sharp said, ‘but they beat what the Goa’uld Loyalist Jaffa carry all to hell and if we can train the Resistance to use proper cover and manoeuvre, and fight at a distance where the better accuracy will really show its worth, then the Staff-Rifle will give them a hell of a tactical advantage.’
‘Why not give the Jaffa our weapons Sir?’ a marine sergeant asked.
‘The latest production model L2A2 Laser Rifle with the improved power-pack and zat costs thirty-three thousand dollars each to manufacture’ Sharp replied, ‘and we’d have to supply naquadah reactors to recharge them with’ he said. ‘If we gave them conventional weapons it would be cheaper but they’d be entirely reliant on us to supply ammunition’ he noted, ‘this thing is cheap to convert, doesn’t require ammunition and will run for years on its power-cell’ he said holding up the Staff-Rifle. ‘Besides which do you have any idea just how many damn Staff-Weapons we’ve got in storage?’ he asked rhetorically, ‘every time we get into a firefight you people throw another dozen at least back through the gate.’
‘I heard Area 51 has a warehouse full of them stacked up to the ceiling’ Carter interjected.
‘The more we can get rid of the better’ Sharp agreed. ‘It’s really not that bad a weapon when you can aim it properly’ he said, shouldering the weapon and sighting it on the far wall. ‘Be honest, how many of you would be alive if your average Jaffa Warrior could hit the side of a barn if he wasn’t inside it?’ he asked to more laughter. ‘No offence Teal’c’ he added.
‘None taken Commander’ Teal’c responded. ‘My experience with the soldiers of the Tau’ri have long left me with the knowledge that although the Staff is an effective weapon of terror, useful for intimidation or melee battle, it is not an effective weapon of war’ he said. ‘The old ways and weapons may still hold a place in the Jaffa heart but it would be irrational for them to remain in our minds and hands.’
‘And besides which if we ever have a problem with the Free Jaffa they won’t have weapons that’ll penetrate our body armour’ O’Neill added, giving Sharp a look that said I know you thought of it first.
‘Never occurred to me’ Sharp responded, lying through his teeth though he did it well enough that O’Neill decided not to play poker with the man.
‘How many Free Jaffa have we got on our side now?’ the recently promoted Major Griff now commander of SG-2 asked.
‘Near a hundred warriors ready to take the field of battle though the number will swell when news of their successes spread’ Teal’c replied. ‘Master Bra’tac is rallying them for the offensive against Apophis.’
‘The Tok’ra have given us a list of suitable worlds with staunchly loyalist garrisons which the Free Jaffa can kick the shit out of’ Sharp announced. ‘Hard fights where Teal’c’s boys will be outnumbered but winnable ones’ he said.
‘So how is the other war going Sir?’ Colonel Barnes queried.
‘Not great’ Sharp replied honestly. ‘We’re down sixty percent on our peak strength of Firestorms and in case you hadn’t heard we lost three Deathgliders the day before yesterday’ he announced in stoic tones. ‘The good news is the prototype Reaper made it through flight tests without crashing, exploding or irradiating the pilot and it’s supposed to be as good as they said it was so if the Interceptor Pilots can hold on a few more weeks we’ll finally be able to meet the Foo Fighters on equal terms.’
‘How many bug ships are getting through?’ O’Neill asked.
‘Too many, we can’t contest every attempted landing’ Sharp replied. ‘Unless they’re headed for a heavily populated area we’re not even trying.’
O’Neill took a deep breath. ‘How many civilians are we losing?’ he asked.
‘Dozens of abductions every week, it would be hundreds if we weren’t conserving our forces for priority missions’ Sharp answered then looked around at the expressions of the assembled personnel. ‘You know from the reports what happens to the people they abduct’ he said. ‘Medical experiments and judging from what we’ve found on some UFO’s they’ve even been used as food’ he said, his face now a dark mask set with determined eyes. ‘Now let’s all get this straight’ he said coldly. ‘We will beat the Sectoids, we will beat the Goa’uld and we will beat every other alien motherfucker that underestimates the human race’ he declared. ‘We lose battles, we lose pilots, we lose soldiers but we will not lose the war and we will never, ever stop fighting regardless of the losses’ he continued. ‘Honour our fallen comrades, grieve for the civilians we couldn’t save, but do your jobs and never for a second believe there’s no hope of final victory because, mark my words, there is no possibility of defeat’ he stated with all the conviction he could muster.
Weir watched as first Colonel O’Neill and then everyone in the room started thumping their fists on the tables faster and faster in approval and agreement. If self belief was a weapon, she thought, then the aliens really had bitten off a lot more than they could chew.
Free Jaffa Camp – P8X-987 – June 2001
‘You realise that as the only survivor of the people that lived here technically Cassie owns this whole planet’ Daniel realised as he looked around the collection of tents that they had provided for the newly arrived Jaffa resistance who were starting to make themselves at home, some scouting the local area, others suspiciously sampling the dubious delights of MRE ration packs.
Carter had been checking the contents of a crate of miscellaneous supplies but now paused in her work, turning to look at him. ‘I never thought of it that way’ she replied. ‘She’s the last Hankan so she inherits everything.’
‘I don’t think anyone is going to try and uphold Nirrti’s claim to the place at least’ Daniel reasoned.
Bra’tac had been walking across the camp and paused listening in on the conversation. ‘Teal’c spoke of the girl of this world the healer adopted’ he said. ‘For the false god Nirrti to murder her entire people and then attempt to use the child as a weapon was an act vile by even the standards of the Goa’uld’ he said. ‘I am surprised you allow Nirrti to live’ he opined.
‘She’s more use to us alive’ Carter replied with a shrug. ‘She knows more about hok’tar genetics than anyone else, except maybe the renegade Asgard Loki, and she’s answered a lot of questions about other advanced goa’uld technology.’
‘The goa’uld are skilled deceivers, you should take care’ Bra’tac warned.
‘They’re also heavily into self-preservation’ Carter replied. ‘At the moment all that stands between Nirrti and being yanked out of the host by the Tok’ra then fed into a waste disposal unit is cooperation’ she said.
‘Be wary’ the old Jaffa master advised. ‘Their overconfidence and arrogance is their greatest weakness, do not fall into the same trap’ he told them, ‘it could as easily be your undoing as theirs’ he said then pointed across the camp to where Teal’c and the Tau’ri female warrior Andianov of Russia were demonstrating the Staff-Rifle to a number of Jaffa. ‘Many of our number have expressed dissatisfaction that you have supplied such weapons’ he noted.
‘You wanted regular Staff’s and Zat’nik’tels?’ Daniel queried.
‘No we had thought we would be given the light-beam weapons that the Tau’ri soldiers now carry’ Bra’tac replied, ‘Teal’c tells me you call them Laser Rifles’ he continued. ‘That your weapons are not only more effective in battle, but also more advanced is clear to all that have seen them’ he said.
Carter closed the crate she had been checking and moved to the next one. ‘You’ll be surprised just how much better the Staff-Rifle is than the original weapon’ she told the Jaffa Master. ‘I’m sorry but the decision to give you those instead of our L2-A2 Lasers was taken higher up the chain of command than myself or Colonel O’Neill though’ she added.
‘Teal’c said it was the order of Sharp of Canada’ Bra’tac replied.
‘Maybe but I think the bean-counters might have played a part too’ Carter told him.
‘Bean Counters?’ Bra’tac repeated quizzically. ‘Why would those who tally crops have influence on such a decision?’ he asked in confusion.
‘It’s a slang phrase meaning an accountant or similar’ Daniel explained, ‘someone who determines the value of things and may decide how many can be bought, made or sold’ he said. ‘The Laser Rifles are very expensive, you could purchase many of the old projectile weapons we used to use for the price of a single one.’
‘These “bean-counters” have ruled then that your weapons are too valuable to give away’ Bra’tac said thoughtfully. ‘If we offered fair exchange could then the Free Jaffa purchase them?’ he asked.
‘I think that might depend on what you had to trade’ Daniel replied, thinking about it. ‘It would have to be something valuable enough to silence any objections’ he surmised.
‘Naquadah may fall into our hands’ Bra’tac noted, ‘would that be considered valuable enough?’ he queried.
‘You can never get too much naquadah, weapons grade would be the most valuable’ Carter responded in the affirmative, ‘pieces of obscure Goa’uld technology would be worth something too’ she added. ‘No staff weapons, those we’ve got too many of already’ she told him with a smile.
‘Taken from the still warm bodies of fallen Jaffa’ Bra’tac replied flatly. ‘It has become a modern legend that the Tau’ri soldiers are like locusts which strip the land free of anything they value’ he said. ‘And before they leave they destroy anything useful they cannot steal’ he continued, ‘there is rarely a bridge, mine or dam left intact after the Tau’ri raid a world it is said.’
‘Yes that sounds like the way we do things now’ Daniel replied, sounding less than overwhelming enthusiastic as to the change in policy.
‘It is an effective, though I cannot say honourable way to make war’ Bra’tac observed.
‘To quote Vince Lombardi’ Colonel O’Neill said, joining the group, ‘Winning isn’t everything, it’s the only thing’ he said.
Bra’tac turned to him. ‘Is this Vince Lombardi a renowned leader of warriors amongst the Tau’ri?’ he asked.
‘Won five NFL League Championships in nine years’ O’Neill affirmed. ‘I just got off the radio to the SGC’ he announced. ‘They just got a report back from Sharp and his merry band of roving lunatics’ he told them, ‘they’ve taken out the second target in their list and they’re moving onto the third, a recovery and retrieval team from the SGC is going to do the clean up.’
Carter nodded. ‘Sounds like arriving by cloaked Tel’tac is working then Sir?’ she replied.
‘Can you imagine the paranoia when word spreads we’re doing that?’ O’Neill asked rhetorically. ‘Apophis is going to be pissed’ he said happily.
‘You know he could retaliate easily enough’ Daniel pointed out. ‘We know he can cloak whole Ha’taks.’
‘You have no equivalent empire and if he attacks Earth directly he risks war with the Asgard’ Bra’tac replied. ‘He will not do so, they are feared by all Goa’uld, no System Lord has ever faced them in battle and achieved even a small measure of victory’ he said. ‘The legends speak of Thor’s Chariot smashing a whole flotilla of Ha’tak’s single handed without being even damaged.’
‘That was an old Beliskner Class Cruiser’ the Colonel responded, ‘you should see one of their new kick-ass O’Neill Class Warships’ he said.
‘Sir do you plan to tell everyone at every opportunity about those?’ Carter asked.
‘Yes’ O’Neill replied. ‘And if they ever make a Carter Class ship you will too’ he told her.
‘The Asgard named a class of warships after you?’ Bra’tac queried of O’Neill, clearly impressed.
‘Yeah me and Thor are good buddies’ the Colonel told him with a smile.
‘Jack and Freyr not so much’ Daniel couldn’t resist noting.
‘We had a tiny personality clash I’ll admit’ O’Neill conceded.
‘It’s just a good thing Freyr as a clone doesn’t have a mother or he might have been pretty insulted by what you called him Sir’ Carter observed.
‘Yeah well, I did ask to talk to Thor instead’ O’Neill responded awkwardly. ‘Anyhow we know the Asgard can be jerks just like humans so it’s not like just because they’re way more advanced they’re automatically way better people’ he said. ‘Look at Loki’ he continued, ‘clear favourite to win Evil Asshole of the Galaxy Award 2001.’
‘I used to think Apophis was the clear front runner, after winning the previous four years in a row like he did’ Daniel replied seriously, playing along because Bra’tac looked like he was taking O’Neills comment seriously and was likely wondering if the title was awarded by a special Tau’ri committee set up for the purpose.
‘Well at least we know it’s between the two of them’ Carter interjected, ‘I mean what’s the chances of a new Nominee with a chance of winning coming along now?’ she asked rhetorically.
Goa’uld Base – P3S-114 – June 2001
Holding the data storage device in one hand Ba’al smiled as he waved the stone over it to change the display to the next page. ‘I wish all my commanders were as competent as you Zarin’ he told the other goa’uld sat across the table from him as they picked over a light lunch. ‘This world is as productive as any in my realm and the garrisons of my troops under your command compare in skills and training to even the elite Jaffa regiments I hand-picked myself’ he said. ‘Were I as paranoid as some I would have you killed as a possible threat’ he said with a chuckle.
Zarin laughed. ‘If I served a System Lord who was less well balanced I would deliberately make sure to look less competent’ she responded. ‘Fortunately My Lord you grasp the value of having lieutenants with abilities other than sycophancy’ she said.
Ba’al looked around to make sure they were alone. ‘Unlike my peers I’m still aware that we made up the story about being gods to help maintain dominance over the primitive, superstitious slaves we took from among the Tau’ri’ he said. ‘Unfortunately over the centuries most System Lord’s seem to have succumbed to their own propaganda’ he continued, shaking his head sadly. ‘Having retained my grip on reality I realise that it’s safer to put my trust in the loyalty of skilled underlings than to trust in the delusion I am divine’ he said. ‘I do still expect the sycophancy however’ he added with amusement.
Zarin bowed slightly. ‘Of course’ she said, before reaching for a piece of succulent fruit. ‘As you ordered I have begun an accelerated training program for new Jaffa Warriors and increased production of weapons’ she told him before taking a bite.
‘Good’ Ba’al replied, putting down the data tablet and the page-turner and reaching for a similar piece of fruit for himself. ‘You know we’ll be at war with Apophis within weeks?’ he asked.
Zarin nodded. ‘I guessed that was your reason for visiting’ she replied.
‘Losses will be heavy, I will need you to help oversee several more worlds and ensure war production and training of replacement troops takes place at maximum efficiency’ Ba’al commanded.
‘I will toil every minute of the day to ensure it’ Zarin replied then paused. ‘May I speak freely?’ she asked with a frown.
‘You are going to ask whether we can win a war with Apophis?’ Ba’al pre-empted her question. ‘The answer in normal circumstances would be no but these are not normal circumstances’ he said. ‘If they were I would have executed you as soon as I learned that you were of the Tok’ra’ he said with a smirk.
Zarin’s eyes widened as Ba’al pointed his left hand towards her, palm flat as he pointed a previously concealed zae’tarc beam weapon at her. ‘My Lord I am not...’ she began.
‘Please don’t insult my intelligence or your dignity by lying’ Ba’al told her. ‘This is only a guarantee that you won’t do something stupid’ he told her indicating the weapon. ‘I know that the Tok’ra have been providing information to the other System Lords fighting Apophis, I also know that you consider him a greater threat than the rest of us put together’ he continued. ‘In short your enemies enemy is your friend, at least for now, so I see no logic in not uniting against a far more dangerous foe’ Ba’al announced.
The Tok’ra agent blinked. ‘You seek alliance?’ she asked.
‘Temporarily’ Ba’al replied. ‘I seek you personally to continue your duties and help prepare my armies to fight Apophis and I seek whatever intelligence the Tok’ra as a whole might provide to enable me to best combat him he said. ‘Don’t think I’ve gone soft, I plan to crush you mutant traitors in the future but I won’t have a future unless Apophis is stopped’ he stated.
Zarin fought the urge to take flight, or else try and take Ba’al with her by detonating one of the concealed weapons she was carrying, and instead tried to look calm and relaxed. ‘If you consider Apophis such an overriding threat why did you not join the war earlier?’ she asked.
‘A question every Goa’uld in the Galaxy would probably wish answered’ Ba’al replied. ‘The truth is I needed the time to modify a number of Ha’tak vessels to both detect the cloaked versions Apophis is using and increase their shield and weapons power’ he answered truthfully. ‘Numbers are still limited but they are superior enough to help counter the vast fleet Apophis inherited from Sokar.’
‘I was not aware you had been devoting such resources towards the research required to advance your ship technology so far’ Zarin said in surprise. ‘Was this a project of Nerus?’ she asked. The overweight and annoying though brilliant goa’uld scientist in Ba’als service was renowned for his inventions.
Ba’al smiled. ‘Always seeking intelligence’ he responded, half in amusement, half in mild admiration. ‘No the information came from somewhere else’ he told her. ‘Another ally who would likely be an enemy in different circumstances’ he explained. ‘I only wish the situation was such that I could avoid dealing with you both’ he added wistfully.
‘Who is this other ally?’ Zarin asked.
‘You know to be honest I do wonder if “what” rather than “who” might be a more accurate way to phrase that question’ Ba’al replied.
A hooded figure in a heavy black cloak appeared from nowhere beside them. ‘Do not test my patience or seek to mock me Ba’al’ it said in a tone which even other goa’uld would have considered excessively melodramatic. ‘I am Anubis’ the figure declared.
‘As a hologram’ Ba’al told Zarin, reaching over to wave his hand through it because he knew just how annoyed the even less corporeal than normal Anubis would be if he did.
‘Anubis’ Zarin repeated in horror. ‘He vanished centuries past.’
‘I have returned’ Anubis stated. ‘Inform your kind I will annihilate them once I have dealt with Apophis’ he told Zarin.
‘Commanding presence, knowledge of Ancient Technology but no social skills whatsoever’ Ba’al commented shaking his head sadly. ‘He’s probably scowling at me from under that cowl now too’ he told Zarin with a smirk. ‘Unfortunately he needs me’ he said, the fact was that Apophis had such a great fleet it went a long way to making up for the fact that the technology Anubis had meant his Ha’taks were individually far superior.
‘That will not be the situation forever’ Anubis stated, Ba’al would pay for his mockery and lack of deference one day.
Ba’al inwardly shrugged, he had to survive Apophis first before he needed to start worrying about Anubis, he had to prioritise stopping one posturing megalomaniac with delusions, or perhaps in the latter’s case memories, of near god-hood at a time.