Butterfly Kisses

Butterfly Kisses

by annaK

Summary: Saying goodbye.
Category: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Missing Scene/Epilogue
Episode Related: 817 Threads
Season: Season 8
Pairing: Jack/Sam, none
Rating: GEN
Warnings: none
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 2005-02-12

Many, many thanks to my wonderful beta, Foxcat.

**

"Oh the precious time, Like the wind, the years go by..."

-- 'Butterfly Kisses' by Bob Carlisle and Randy Thomas

**

She makes it as far as the corridor before her vision blurs.

She makes it as far as the elevator before she starts to shake.

She makes it as far as the locker room before her legs give way.

She makes it through two more breaths before she breaks.

**

Samantha Carter was seven years old the first time she said goodbye to her father. Her mom told her that he was lost, that he couldn't find his way home, and that the angels would probably find him before she did. Daddy was going to Heaven, and it was okay to cry.

Mark wanted to send him a map.

**

She's aware that he's standing in the doorway. Feels his presence seep through her skin. She's always been able to sense him.

She remembers a time when she'd sat in this very room, her vision blurring and her stomach aching with the maybes and the might-have-beens and the lingering, acidic burn of discarded hope, and felt another man's presence behind her. Teal'c never promised her forever, but his anchoring presence had been a lifeline that kept her above the waves.

He was there for her then, when Daniel was gone and he, the other he, the one whose eyes are burning through her skin but who she can't yet bring herself to recognize, was not.

But she's trying so hard not to think about Daniel now. About where he is. If he's alive. And how her father held her in this room after a heroic act and a glow of white tore a hole in her heart the last time.

**

The second time she said goodbye to her father, Sam was baking cookies. Mom wasn't coming home. And part of Dad had left with her.

Soon after, Mark assured that the rest of Dad followed suit.

She wonders if she should still hate them both for that.

But, Tok'ra symbiotes aside (and she takes a moment to appreciate the irony of that); life's too short.

**

His arm brushes hers as he sits beside her. His hands clasped in front of him, arms resting on his knees and head slightly bowed. She listens to him breathe and wonders if he wants to cry.

*"You have to actually marry my daughter before you can call me that."*

Jack called him "dad" all the time.

**

She said goodbye a third time, though looking back it was too spur of the moment to count. Tears in her eyes and dress blues that had once made him proud. But time distorts the pictures, and she knows that his pride and her pride had never been the separate entities that she wanted to make them. Not so separate at all. They were bound together intrinsically, two serpents plaited on Medusa (and she knows she should worry that even now, even as the ground opens up and she's not sure if she jumped or if she was pushed, her mind makes images out of snakes).

But he hurt her and he left her, and she started to say goodbye for the third time.

The phoenix rises, though. And wormholes and molecules and protein in her blood, and warm hazel eyes that she wanted to melt into (but it wasn't her, God, it wasn't her) gave her a second chance.

She wonders if Selmak thought of her as his little girl.

**

"I'm so sorry."

A quick glance to her left, and even through the tears she can see that he wants to say more. Do more.

*Always.*

Trembling fingers finally release the material of her pants (she's getting motor-functions back, but her hand's still too slow in obeying her mind's command), and she lies her palm face up on the bench between them.

His hand feels too heavy when it clasps hers.

His grip is too tight.

There's no band on her finger, and when his thumb brushes the bare skin, she wonders if that should mean something.

She grips back even tighter.

*Always.*

**

The fourth time she said goodbye, she thought Mom had been wrong about the angels. Too many devils in this world to let anyone make it to Heaven. But Dad was still alive when they burned through the sky, and the Blood of Sokar stung her soul to clarity. Dad had never really gone away, and maybe all the times she'd said goodbye before were too pre-emptive.

Just like Dad; giving up too soon. Jack hated that.

Netu released them with a billow of smoke and an indignant scream, and Yosemite's frosty climes welcomed them with open arms. Two weeks in the snow and Mark's kids skating around in cotton candy delight, and she let herself believe that families really could survive.

**

"I need to call Mark."

She breathes once, twice. Sniffs and pulls her right sleeve across her cheek.

Her left hand feels clammy in his.

His thumb absently traces her knuckles, a gentle pressure encouraging her to keep talking. To keep breathing. Sometimes it's the simple things that are the hardest.

"I can do it, if you'd like."

His voice is gruff, and she wonders if the grip on her fingers is for his comfort as much as for her own; she hasn't heard the thickness in his voice since one late night around a campfire when he told her that Charlie had been afraid of the dark.

"No, it's okay."

*I need to do this.*

She doesn't say it. But she knows he hears it anyway.

**

The fifth time she said goodbye to her father, she was too bruised to hug him. She remembers that that was her one regret. If she's honest, she thought it was goodbye for good.

She told him she'd miss him.

She cried.

But, eleven months later, when his arms enclosed around her at the base of the ramp, she wasn't really surprised.

She's lost her dad many times.

He always comes back.

**

The tears are still coming, but the knot in her throat is easing away. She concentrates on her heartbeat. She rests her thumb on Jack's pulse and feels it move with her own.

Her breath catches.

"C'mere."

The word is whisper soft, and she turns into his arms, melts against him, holds on for dear life.

His shirt creases beneath her fingers.

His lips brush her cheek.

His breath caresses her face.

*Always.*

**

Samantha Carter is thirty-nine years old the last time she says goodbye to her father.

Jack O'Neill's arms are tight around her. Her face is buried in his neck.

She thinks that Dad would be proud.

**

End

Feedback is lovingly received at annakarrennina@hotmail.com

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As the 'Gate Turns: Fall-Out

As the 'Gate Turns: Fall-Out

by Annerb

Summary: In the aftermath of her time stranded with Jack, Sam clings to her dreams of a 'perfect, normal life' with Pete and the SGC personnel lay bets as to whether there will be a wedding.
Category: Angst, Drama, Series
Episode Related: 713 Grace, 807 Affinity
Season: Season 8
Pairing: Jack/Sam, Sam/Pete
Rating: GEN
Warnings: minor language
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 2005-01-18

Author's Note: Here's part 2 of my little soap opera, hope you enjoyed the first part (Time is of the Essence). This is my answer to the "Pete Problem." It's a series, but there aren't really any cliffhangers, just like episode after episode in my own little future universe. Stay tuned for more!

Feedback: Always appreciated! I tried to be as canon as possible, but who knows!

As the `Gate Turns Part 2: Fall-Out

Tongues had a real reason to wag about a month after Jack and Sam's return from the wilderness planet. Sam began openly wearing her engagement ring around the SGC and rumor had it that she had finally picked a date. Wedding pools were organized, giving odds on different elements of the wedding, from would it ever happen, to whether or not the General would go to it. If Sam was annoyed by the constant whispers or curious eyes that watched her whenever she was speaking with Jack, she didn't let it show. All in all, she was acting just like a bride-to-be was supposed to, anxious, excited and happy.

There was also no outward reaction from the General, though rumors circulated about a three-day alcohol binge that ended with a bar brawl and something about jell-o wrestling. No one was really sure about the validity of that, but they enjoyed hypothesizing nonetheless. As the date finally neared five months later, Sam was seen with a constant big, flashy smile on her face (which seemed a little weird to those that really knew her) and, if you paid careful attention, Pete became quieter and quieter and at the parties leading up to the wedding, he could be seen giving Sam long, measured looks, as it he was trying to figure something out.

...

The guys were standing together outside a small courtyard by the side of the Church. They were each quite a dashing sight, Jack in his dress uniform, all traces of last night's binge erased and Daniel and Teal'c in tuxedos (It had been a bit difficult to find a suit big enough for Teal'c, but they had managed somehow). Cassie was wandering around nervously somewhere else looking beautiful in a red bridesmaid dress that matched the flowers and the guys' bowties. Together the four of them made up Sam's "bridesmaids." No one had thought to comment on the untraditional make-up of the bridal party. The other members of SG-1 were, after all, Sam's best friends in the whole world.

Daniel glanced at his watch again; noting that the wedding should have began 20 minutes ago. The Church was full, and the sound of milling voices could be heard out in the corridor where they were all standing. "Where is Jacob?" muttered Daniel, more to himself than as if he actually expected an answer.

"I am sure that JacobCarter will soon ascertain the whereabouts of PeteShanahan," offered Teal'c. None of them voiced what they were really thinking, which was Where the hell is he? and How could he do this to Sam? Jack had nothing to offer, though he was beginning to get that I'm-gonna-shoot-someone-soon look. Time continued to drag on, and the guys just continued to stand outside the courtyard, all aware of the woman sitting alone on a bench inside, looking amazingly beautiful in her long white dress and veil.

Jack gazed at the vulnerable figure, wanting to offer comfort, knowing that it probably wouldn't be all that welcome. As the wedding date loomed nearer, Sam had put distance between them and Jack had let her. It was her prerogative, after all. Jack tore his eyes from her and instead began to imagine all the ways he could kill that bastard Pete, which was a lot, he had, after all, spent a great deal of time in black ops.

Just as he was imagining all the creative uses of an ordinary ballpoint pen, Pete came into the corridor. He went straight up to Daniel, probably because he seemed to be the least threatening of the three.

"Where's Sam?" he asked brusquely, with the air of a man wanting to get something he dreaded out of the way. Daniel simply pointed into the courtyard and Teal'c put a restraining hand on Jack's perceptively stiffened shoulder. Pete gave Jack a quick glance and then ducked into the courtyard.

...

Sam sat on the bench in the courtyard, absently fiddling with her skirt. Her mind was racing, thinking all at once how she wished her mother could be here to fuss over her and to tell her daughter how beautiful she looked, and how proud she was. Would she be? wondered the small voice in Sam's head. Yes, Sam reassured herself, this is a perfect wedding. I am finally focusing on myself, just like Dad said to me on the Prometheus, I am giving myself a chance to be happy, to be with someone who loves me. Pete was great, but Sam was not unaware of the lateness of the hour. She refused to believe that sweet, dependable Pete would leave her hanging. I hope he is all right, that he didn't get called in for some emergency.

Sam was not unaware of the irony of that idea, after all, people at the SGC had been having a great time betting on whether or not the wedding would ever take place. What were the chances that the world wouldn't need saving on that day? Some people must have lost money, though, for the weeks running up to the wedding had been unbelievably quiet and free of emergencies. Sam almost half suspected that the General had called up everyone and ordered for no problems to happen.

Sam looked up at that point to see her honor guard standing a short distance away. Teal'c looked calm as ever, though Daniel was peering at his watch as if he was unsure that it still worked. She tore he gaze away before she could look at Jack, not willing to let her thoughts travel to what she had long since designated off-limits. She had included him in the wedding party for many reasons, not only because he was one of her best friends and wanted him to be here, but also because she thought that it was somehow a test that she was passing. Almost as if she was proving that she had finally managed to push him out of her heart, that she had completely moved on at last. Before that annoying, small voice in the back of her head could argue with her, she saw Pete coming into the courtyard. She gave herself a moment of relief, wondering at the continued anxiety she felt before she stood up to talk to him.

"Pete, you know you aren't supposed to see me before the wedding," she started playfully. The look on his face stopped her, though. "Pete, is there something wrong?"

He took a moment looking over Sam in her gown, thinking how beautiful she looked. For once, though, he didn't let himself get side tracked. He took a deep breath and said, "Sam, you know that I love you and that I want to be with you forever." Sam mutely nodded, wondering where this was going.

"There is something, though, that has been nagging at me for months. I tried to ignore it, push it away, but I just can't go through this without knowing for sure." Sam looked up at him, expectantly, while her heart pounded away in her chest. "Why are you marrying me?"

Sam almost laughed in relief. He was just getting cold feet and needed some reassurance. She smiled at him. "Oh, Pete. You know why I'm marrying you. You are wonderful, so kind, funny, and you take such good care of me." She touched his hand, "I love you, Pete, you know that."

He didn't smile and grab her hand like she thought he would, however. He pulled away and continued. "Really, Sam? Because I don't think so. I've been thinking about this a lot. I think that you like being with me and I think that you are content, but could you ever really be happy? I love you so much, and thought that maybe that could be enough, but the more I think about it, the more I force myself to really pay attention and face reality, I can finally see that you are not really all here with me. You never were."

He paused there, but Sam was too much in shock to really say anything before he continued on, "To be brutally honest, Sam, no matter how much I love you, and no matter how much it would kill me to lose you, I think I deserve more than being settled for." Sam's eyes grew wide at this last statement. "Pete, no. You're wrong. You do make me happy, why do you think I am marrying you!" She took both of his hands in hers, "Come on, Pete. This is just cold feet. Let's go get married." She ardently refused to hear the little voice in the back of her head that was now trying to scream in protest. I am strong enough to make this work, she railed back at the voice, I deserve happiness!

He was so tempted as he always was, to just push aside his doubts and let himself be with her. But he refused to budge this time, maybe it was the finality of marriage or maybe he was just finally waking up. "There is one thing you can do, Sam, that will make me believe you."

Sam looked up at him, clutching his hands, "Anything."

"Tell me that you don't love him."

She didn't need the slight jerk of his head in the direction of the corridor to know who he meant. And Pete didn't need an answer as Sam's face lost all color and the resolve that had been holding her together for the last six months finally broke, So close! Sam sat back down on the bench, head bowed as she wept in utter defeat, because she knew, no matter how much she wanted this normal life, that she could never lie about that and part of her knew that Pete deserved more than being lied to.

Pete closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath, willing himself to be strong enough to do what was best for both of them. He leaned down, kissed Sam on the top of the head and said, "Goodbye, Sam." He turned and left the courtyard before his resolve could leave him. He paused by the curious group of men by the door, and without looking at any of them said, "Take good care of her." He then disappeared down the corridor, away from the Church. They all looked at each other in shock and then as a one turned to stare at the lone figure, wearing a beautiful wedding gown and weeping.

They gave Sam a couple of minutes, but none of them could stand to see her there all alone, so they soon went in as a group. Jack had a feeling that he shouldn't really be there, so he stood quietly behind Teal'c and Daniel, keeping his expression neutral. Daniel kneeled down, offering Sam a handkerchief. She mopped her face, but refused to look up at any of them.

"Sam?" Daniel asked gently, there had already been an unspoken agreement between them that Daniel would handle the talking, he was better at this stuff anyway.

She abruptly stood up and walked a short distance away from them. With her back to them she said, "I wonder if there was a pool for whether or not I would get left at the altar?" The voice was horrible to hear, sad, defeated and self-mocking.

"Sam, is there anything...?" Daniel was wondering if maybe Pete had just succumbed to a case of cold feet. As if she had heard his thoughts, Sam continued on, in the same horrible tone. "No, Daniel, this charade is finally over," she said, roughly pulling off her veil. "He was right, he does deserve better."

"What?!" Jack had forgotten his resolve to remain silent as his rage at Pete for hurting Sam boiled to the surface. "He said that to you? Now I am going to kill him."

"Yeah, that would make everything much better." Now Sam was beginning to sound angry, which was slightly better, because they were not used to seeing Sam weak. "I can't believe I was ever so stupid to believe that I could have a normal life! Get married, be happy, yeah right!" She wadded up her veil and threw it into the small fountain at the center of the courtyard.

Daniel seemed at a bit of a loss and Jack thought that Teal'c almost looked a little intimidated by Sam's rage. Jack bit the bullet and reached out to touch Sam's shoulder, "Carter-" He didn't get to finish, though, because at the sound of his voice and the touch of his hand, she whirled around, he eyes blazing. "No! You don't get to touch me, you don't get to console me!" Jack was momentarily stunned by the accusation in her eyes and the anger in her tone.

Sam stared at him and seemed to visibly deflate, the anger leaving her eyes, leaving nothing but vulnerability. "Please," she whispered, "please just leave me alone." Jack stood for a moment, gazing at her, before turning and leaving, fleeing the accusation and pain in Sam's eyes. Daniel and Teal'c quietly followed, leaving Sam alone with her broken dreams and her broken heart.

...

Sam wasn't sure who told all the guests the news that there was not, in fact, going to be a wedding, or who took care of returning all the gifts and paying the caterers. Frankly, she didn't care. She had already planned to take two weeks vacation from the SGC for the honeymoon that was supposed to follow the wedding and she used them, though not for the trip she originally had planned. Instead, she fled to her brother's house in San Diego, slipping away without word to anyone. Seeking to get far from the wagging tongues of the SGC, the glances of worry and pity and the memories that haunted her, she had fled that same day, dress, flowers and plans abandoned. Her father had come to see her the first few days in San Diego, so she knew they knew where she was, but her friends were letting her be.

Her family was also great at giving her distance. There were no questions, no discussions about Pete, just space and support. It was still a horrible, empty time, however, as it provided her with endless time to think about what she had done. She wasn't really sure where she had gone so wrong or how she had gotten to this place. She did know, however, that she wasn't angry at Pete. He had probably done them both a favor in the long run.

She was having a hard time remembering why she had pushed so hard, so quickly for the wedding. Pete had been content to wait, but she had been like something possessed the last five months. She had somehow become convinced that if they just got married, that everything would be okay. Marriage would decide everything, there would be no more questions, no more decisions, no more what ifs.

She guessed that maybe that was the real issue, the need to escape beneath the shield of Pete to keep herself from really dealing with everything that had happened. She was so obsessed with something that could be considered normal, something that could be all hers. Poor Pete, she thought, for it had become clear in the days after that she had been using him to hide in, to separate her from everything else, and that she never really loved him as much as he loved her.

I just wanted to forget, she admitted to herself, when she was finally ready to be honest with herself. I wanted to forget what it felt like to be with him. That truly was the crux of the issue. She had finally let herself taste the forbidden fruit and it had scared her to death. Pete was safe, comfortable and easy. She could be with him and stay in control. But what she had felt, that one night with Jack, it was overwhelming, and she had sensed that it had the power to destroy her. Coward! accused the voice in her head, and she knew that it was right. She had thrown herself into a wedding to a man that she didn't love, trying to drown out what Jack couldn't even remember.

She flinched as she remembered her anger at Jack after the wedding, so convinced that all of this was his fault. At the time, it seemed like it was, but now she knew that it was all on her. She had always been the one to run away. Jack was the one that always stood by her, he was even ready to stand by and watch her marry someone else because he thought it would make her happy. Sam was the one who would let anything get between them, any excuse she could come up with, all to avoid the feeling of the loss of control. She was a coward and she wondered, as the last of her vacation days slipped away, how she could ever face any of them ever again.

...

Jack sat at his desk, staring at a report he was supposed to be reading. To be honest, he was more hiding than working, which is what he did a lot of these days. People were trying not to be obvious, but he constantly felt eyes boring into his back wherever he went inside the SGC. Everyone was curious as to what had happened, but nobody more so than Jack himself. He spent that time hiding in his office thinking over the last six months, trying to pick out any signs of strange behavior from Carter, wondering what had caused such a display of anger and accusation at their last meeting. Neither Daniel nor Teal'c ever mentioned the whole affair to Jack, though he suspected that they would like to say something.

Jack was convinced that he had missed nothing. He knew he hadn't seen as much of SG-1 over the last six months as he usually did, but he still had meals and briefings with them almost daily. Carter seemed to have been genuinely happy. Had it been an act? He thought he knew Carter well enough to tell if she was faking it. Not if you didn't want to believe it, thought an annoying voice in the back of his mind. Why wouldn't he want to believe it? Jack may not have liked that Pete guy much, but if he had her happy, then that was good enough for me. As far as her work at the SGC, there had not been any especially stressful missions, other than the one short time spent in captivity right after they got back from that planet. Sure, we also both almost died on that planet, but that wasn't the first time, nor, he feared, would it be the last.

And so Jack sat, hiding in his office over those two weeks, wondering what had really happened, all the while feeling like there was something that he had missed.

...

Sam had been home for less than two hours when there was a knock at her door. She automatically stiffened, being unable to think of a single person that she didn't dread seeing. She sighed and resolved herself to awkward conversation. She opened the door to find Daniel, looking almost as uncomfortable as she felt. Surprisingly, his discomfort made her smile, and she remembered how much she had missed all her friends. She reached out and gave him a hug, and his perceptible relief at a warm welcome made her feel guilty.

She pulled back, "Daniel, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to go all bridezilla on everyone."

He smiled, "Don't worry about it, Sam. I think everyone understood. We were just worried about you."

"I know." Sam invited him in and they settled on the couch, and Sam was once again relieved at the familiar feeling of comfortable friendship. Daniel wasn't here to judge her or even grill her for information, though she was sure he had questions. "How's everything in the Mountain these days? Everyone going to town over the exciting new gossip?"

"Of course, you know how it is. Though, I am sure that most people are just curious. They want to know that you are okay." Sam doubted that, but it was nice of Daniel to say all the same.

"So, you got sent on the early reconnaissance mission to see if I was still crazy? Are the others holding safe-distance positions until the all clear?"

Daniel certainly liked the light banter and her attempt at humor, but he really thought that she must need someone to talk to. "Sam." She looked up at him. "What really happened?"

Sam looked away for a bit, but realized that nothing would really settle down until she told the story. It would probably make her feel better in the long run anyway. It would have to be an edited version, however, there were some things that she was not sure she would ever be ready to share. But she had gotten really good at getting points across without ever saying anything. The truth was, after all, that Pete left her because she didn't love him, she didn't need to get into who she actually did love.

She looked back up at Daniel, "Why don't you give Teal'c a call. Tell him to grab a pizza and I'll tell you both all about it."

Daniel looked like he really wanted to say something else, but was too scared. Sam gave him a look and he said, "Just Teal'c?"

Sam nodded, "For now." And they left it at that.

...

Two days later, she finally had to return to work. Reconnecting with Daniel and Teal'c made it an easier task, knowing that she had at least two allies. Daniel and Teal'c seemed to have understood exactly, as far as they knew, what had happened and they were able to agree that it was probably for the best in the end. The only thing that Sam really still regretted was that Pete had to get hurt, but Sam had really learned a valuable lesson about herself. She also regretted the way she had treated the General (as she had once again began calling him in her head). She wasn't sure how to fix that without opening a whole new can of worms.

Her first day back seemed normal enough, she could perceive no whispering and caught no one looking at her, though this very lack of interest seemed weird to Sam. She spent the first morning working in her lab, catching up with paperwork, checking the status on several projects and generally hiding. Daniel popped into her office right before lunch.

"How's it going?"

"Like riding a bicycle," Sam replied with a weak smile.

"Good. Ready for the next hurdle?" She knew he meant lunch in the commissary and a possible first run-in with the General. She put down her pencil, squared her shoulders and nodded. Hell, if she could handle the Replicators, Goa'uld and the more unseemly set of Earth politicians, she could handle a room full of staring eyes and one one-star General. She hoped.

It didn't end up being that bad, nothing more than a few whispers, aided by the fact that the General did not make an appearance. She still sort of jumped every time someone entered the room, dreading that it might be the General. By the end of lunch, she realized how silly she was being. Sam didn't really want her first meeting with the General since she got back to be in front of all these prying eyes. It was time to grow up and just go see him in his office, where there would be no witnesses if it went really bad. Nice, Sam, very optimistic, she thought wryly to herself.

Fifteen minutes later, she stood loitering outside his door. Siler had already passed by twice, doing his best to pretend he didn't notice her hovering outside the General's office. Though the third time by, he gave her what he hoped was an encouraging smile. Sam knew she was just causing more gossip and raised eyebrows the longer she stood there, so she finally raised her hand and knocked quietly, half-hoping he wouldn't hear it. Coward, accused that damn voice in her head again.

Whatever Sam's character might be, she was now trapped because she heard his voice calling out permission to enter. She took a deep breath and entered his office. At first, he didn't look up from some report that he was carefully writing on, his face sort of screwed up in concentration.

"There!" he eventually said as he sat back with a flourish and finally looked up at his visitor. "What can I do-" He stopped when he noticed who had come in. He composed his surprise quickly and then continued. "Colonel. Back to work already?"

She nodded silently, wondering where to begin. Jack noticed her squirming, but felt no overwhelming urge to make her more comfortable. Real mature, Jack, he thought. If he was honest, he was still angry and confused and it was making him somewhat childish. The silence continued on and just when he thought she wasn't ever going to get around to saying anything, she finally stopped absently looking around his office and looked him straight in the eye.

"I just wanted to say, Sir, how sorry I am for my behavior. I shouldn't have..." her voice sort of trailed off.

The guilt in her eyes bothered Jack and he decided to let her off the hook. Heck, he could never stay mad at Carter for very long anyway. He shook his head at her, "Look Carter, we all know you were going through a difficult time. Forget about it."

"No, there is no excuse. I had no right to speak to you in that manner, Sir."

"As your superior officer?" Damn, Jack wished he hadn't said that. He looked away, not wanting to let her know that she had hurt him with her accusatory eyes and angry words.

Sam wasn't unaware of his feelings, however. "Of course as a superior officer, believe it or not, I am not shooting for a court-martial." Her attempt at humor was a little hollow to both of them. "But, I...You were there as a friend, Sir, and no one should ever talk to their friends like that."

"Not even when they have a reason to be pissed?" He was finally looking at her again, perhaps a bit mollified at her referral to their friendship, rather than their rank.

Sam sighed, and collapsed into the chair in front of his desk. "Well, Sir, to be honest, I don't think that I was really the injured party." He raised an eyebrow at this, silently reminding her that she was the one left at the altar. She flashed him a small, sad smile. "Now that I've had some time to think about it all, I realized that Pete was right. Getting married was a really bad idea."

Jack didn't really know how to reply to that, but seeing her there, sitting in his chair, confiding in him like she used to do, it made him feel better. Sam noticed the old feelings of comfort and friendship coming back too, and continued on, feeling that he deserved a confession, well a partial one, and that she might feel better for having done it.

"I'm just not sure that I ever loved Pete. I think I loved what he stood for: a normal life. He was kind and fun, uncomplicated. But he deserves more than a wife who liked him because he was comfortable to be around and fit easily into her life with minimum effort." Sam sighed. "I guess I was just being a selfish coward."

"I have a hard time believing that you could ever be a coward, Carter."

"Well, it seems clear to me now, that I am certainly a coward about some things." The meanings behind that statement hung in the air between them, the old, unspeakable topic. In honor of their new reconciliation, or perhaps just because of old habits, they both let that issue go. They just sat there for a while, the awkwardness replaced with comfortable silence. A knock at the door broke their reverie.

Sam smiled at the General, "Back to work, I guess." He nodded. She crossed over to the door to let herself out.

"Carter," Jack called out before she opened the door. She looked back at him. "It's good to have you back." Jack was rewarded with a genuine smile before she turned to leave. It was at that moment that he finally realized that he hadn't seen her smile, a real smile, for months. Further musings were interrupted by his new guest, a scientist from the alien technology sector who nervously told Jack that he may have accidentally turned his labmate into a human icicle with a new piece of technology brought back from P6S-745. Jack rolled his eyes, scientists.

...

If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Annerb

As the 'Gate Turns: Discovery

As the 'Gate Turns: Discovery

by Annerb

Summary: Just when things were finally getting back to normal, the Tok'ra come to stir the plot. Their information leads to a shocking discovery.
Category: Action/Adventure, Angst, Drama, Series
Season: Season 8
Pairing: Jack/Sam
Rating: 13+
Warnings: minor character death, minor language, violence
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 2005-03-01

Author's Note: Here's part 3! The action kicks up a bit, and we meet some new characters. Endless thanks to Triptnx and Montage. Feedback: Always appreciated! I tried to be as canon as possible, but who knows!

As the `Gate Turns Part 3: Discovery

General Jack O'Neill and SG-1 stood together watching the rotation of the Stargate with varied expressions. Teal'c, of course, being Teal'c, seemed as self-contained as always, only his lack of weapons spoke to his ease and the way his eyes looked to the spinning ring told of his curiosity. Daniel was a bit more open, his eyes bright behind his glasses, a small journal tucked under his arm and a pen circling in his free hand. He gently shifted his weight back and forth from one foot to the other, shooting speculative glances at Jack.

Sam stood between Jack and Daniel, her expression nearly as guarded as Teal'c's. But, being Sam, if you really knew her, as her companions did, you could detect an uneasy mingling of excitement and distrust. Jack, on the other hand, made no such attempt to guard his expression. He was clearly in no mood to be patient and seemed to be bracing himself for something highly unpleasant. Sam might have laughed at his expression under any other circumstance. The quartet remained standing, silently watching the alien technology at the center of their careers and lives.

An airman's voice broke through the silence, "Receiving Tok'ra IDC, sir." Jack mumbled something indecipherable about the Tok'ra under his breath.

Sam glanced at him speculatively, "Sir?" She managed to communicate a lot with that one word, not the least of which was `open the iris unless you want to splatter my father, which wouldn't please me all that much.'

"Yeah, yeah, Carter," answered Jack, before calling out louder for the tech to open the iris. He then sighed heavily, his dislike for the Tok'ra clear.

"Maybe it's just a social call," Sam offered brightly, not believing it for a moment herself. Jack's glare told her he could read her like a book. Sam could only hope that her father would be the Tok'ra representative, both because Jack liked him and he would therefore do a marginally better job listening to whatever the Tok'ra wanted, and also because she had not seen her father since her wedding, or rather her not-wedding. The disintegration of the Tok'ra-human alliance had deprived Sam of her closest family member, not just an ally against the Goa'uld.

The first figure through the gate was Jacob and Selmak. Sam could feel Jack relax perceptibly beside her, only to quickly tense again as his worst fear materialized. A second figure stepped through the gate after Jacob. The wormhole disengaged and the two visitors came down the ramp. The tall, rather voluptuous woman that accompanied Jacob strode straight up to Jack and was the first to speak.

"General O'Neill, we were pleased to hear of your promotion as the commander of this facility. We can think of no one better suited for such a position."

Sam tried her best to focus on the poorly disguised annoyance on Jack's face rather than the way the woman stood too closely to Jack or the stupid urge Sam felt to make her step back. Almost as if she could read Sam's mind, the woman glanced at her briefly before turning her attention back to the General.

"Well...ah...thanks, Freya, but something tells me you didn't travel all this way just to congratulate me." Jack stepped back from Freya/Anise and turned his attention to Jacob. "So, what's up? Wouldn't happen to need someone to help save your collective asses again, would we?"

As inflammatory as Jack was trying to be, Jacob simply laughed and looked affectionately at Jack after winking at his daughter. "Ever the diplomat aren't we, Jack?"

"To be fair, Dad, things do tend to turn out badly whenever you guys show up," Sam offered, unaware that she was automatically defending Jack. Jacob did not seem as unaware of this habit, quickly filing the information away in his don't-think-about-it-too-much file.

"Well, Sammie, I can't say that this time will be any different," Jacob sighed.

"So then tell me this, Jacob: why aren't I just chucking you both back out of here?"

"Because this time, Jack, it's Earth's ass that's on the line." Jack sighed heavily at this and half-heartedly gestured for them all to follow him up to the briefing room.

They managed to settle around the briefing table with only a miniscule scuffle as Sam rather elegantly shoved her way into her usual seat at the head of the table next to Jack, forcing Anise to take a seat between Sam and Teal'c. While not overtly obvious, the action did earn a displeased glare from Anise, an amused look from Jacob and a grateful smile from Jack.

Once they were all comfortably seated, Jack turned to Jacob. "Alright, Jake, let's hear it."

"Well, we managed to get an agent into one of Baal's motherships. He was pretending to be a minor Goa'uld in his service. He hadn't gained much access when he overheard something he wasn't supposed to. He managed to relay the information to us, but we think he might have been compromised because we have not heard from him since."

"How long have you been out of contact?" asked Sam.

"It's been over a month," Jacob supplied.

"I take it this is another `sacrifice for the greater cause' and that you aren't here to mount a rescue," Jack noted sarcastically, his dislike of the Tok'ra habit of leaving people behind clear.

Jacob just gave Jack his your-way-isn't-the-only-way look. Anise took advantage of their staring match to jump into the conversation. "Ter'il is more than likely lost to us, but he did manage to collect valuable data."

Sam turned to Anise. "And what? That makes his sacrifice not in vain?" she asked, somewhat harshly, remembering a similar conversation she had with this woman as she held Martouf's lifeless body.

"Sammie," Jacob broke in with an understanding tone, "we are not here to debate the value system of the Tok'ra."

"Right," jumped in Daniel, clearly uncomfortable with the charged atmosphere that was building up between the two former allies. He turned to Anise, "So what did Ter'il overhear that he wasn't supposed to?"

Glad to get back on topic, Anise launched into an explanation. "There is another Goa'uld in the service of Baal, known as Enki." Before she could continue, all of the humans automatically paused and looked at Daniel as he began to rack his brain for references to this figure in Earth history.

"Right," he said eventually. "Enki was a lesser known Babylonian God also known as Ea. He's important as part of their creation myth. It's said that he created humans out of the blood of a fallen god. Supposedly, he made people to serve the gods, so they would never have to work again."

"Sounds about right," muttered Jack, liking the Goa'uld even less, if possible.

"Not so far off, actually, considering that Ter'il overheard Enki discussing an experiment that he is working on for Baal," supplied Jacob. "Enki was boasting that when his project was finished, Baal would be eternally grateful for being given a way to destroy the Tau'ri. He said that if successful, his project would provide the `ultimate weapon.'"

The table was silent for a moment as this information sunk in. Jack leaned back in his chair, trying to look unconcerned. "Okay, who's to say that this isn't typical Goa'uld I'm-king-of-the-Universe crap?"

Jacob nodded in understanding, the Goa'uld were pretty big on boasts and not always as big with following through. "Ter'il wasn't able to collect much information, but he was able to break into his lab and confirm that Enki was working with human DNA." Sam sat up straight at this information. "Human DNA?" The possibilities that this opened up swam around her head, each one more nefarious than the last. Again, almost instinctually, the humans at the table turned and looked at Sam, waiting for her to enlighten them as to what the `ultimate weapon' could be. "It really could be anything, none of it good," Sam offered finally.

"Any guesses?" Jack asked.

"Well, worst case scenario, they could be working on developing genetic weapons like the Aschen had. But I'm not sure that they would want to take out our entire population like that. Don't the Goa'uld usually take over planets, needing more slaves and hosts, rather than wiping them out completely?"

It was Teal'c's turn to jump in with information. "That is usually true, ColonelCarter, but they have been known to destroy entire planets if the threat was big enough."

"Or annoying enough," offered Jack. They all turned to look at him. "Come on. They have been trying to get rid of us unsuccessfully for eight years! All the while, we have been thinning them out like crazy. Maybe all they care about now is removing the `Tau'ri threat' at any cost." Everyone took a moment to absorb his insight.

Teal'c nodded stolidly. "I agree with your assessment, O'Neill."

Jack turned back to Sam. "Could they really do it? Wipe us out?"

"It's theoretically possible, sir."

"Crap."

They continued debating the possible `ultimate weapons' for a while, but they all knew that speculation would only get them so far. The only way to be sure was for SG-1 to go check it out. Jacob had managed to delicately explain that the Tok'ra themselves had no operatives to spare at the moment. It seemed clear to Sam that he had probably had to fight tooth and nail just to get the Tok'ra high council to let him come warn them. It would be too much to hope that their former allies would lend them a hand. Sam smiled at her dad to let him know that she understood.

Duty dispatched, Jacob and Anise rose to take their leave. Jacob pulled Sam aside while the gate dialed, hoping to grab at least a few moments together.

"Sammie, I'm really sorry that-"

Sam cut him off. "Dad, our relationship with the Tok'ra is not your fault. I know you and Selmak are doing everything you can on your end."

Jacob gave Sam's hand a squeeze. "I know. I just hate that I'm here even less than I used to be. We haven't seen each other for over six months. I hated to leave you after the..." His voice trailed off and Sam smiled.

"It's okay, you can say it. It's been six months since I didn't marry Pete." Jacob flinched at her offhand way of putting it. Sam just laughed. "I know you won't believe me, but it really did end up being a good thing. It helped me realize some things about myself."

Jacob looked at her speculatively for a moment and Sam knew he was trying to gauge how truthful she was being. Eventually he shrugged, "Well, as Selmak just pointed out to me, you do seem more relaxed. I wish we had more time to talk about it, though." As he said that, of course, the Stargate swooshed into life behind them. He gave Sam a wry smile and she worked to hold back the sudden twist in her gut at the thought that she really had no idea if or when she would ever get to see him again.

Jacob pulled Sam into a hug and whispered into her ear, "Be safe. If you ever need me, send word, I'll do everything I can to get back."

Sam nodded into his neck and pulled back. "Take care of him for me, Selmak. Try to keep him out of trouble if you can."

Jacob glared teasingly at Sam as he followed Anise up the ramp. Right before he stepped through the event horizon, Jacob turned back and looked over towards Jack, Daniel and Teal'c. "Take care of my girl." Sam didn't think to protest as Jack nodded back and her father disappeared. Sam carefully swallowed the unexpected prick of tears and stared at the empty space where her father had been moments before. She gave herself one more moment of sentiment before shaking it off and turning her mind back to the mission ahead of her. Sam glanced up to find Jack watching her with an inscrutable expression.

When he didn't look away, Sam gave him a small smile to let him know that she was okay. He nodded and then turned back to Daniel and Teal'c. "Alright kids, let's spec out a mission," he said lightly and then led them back up into the briefing room.

...

Jack eventually, though reluctantly, agreed to let SG-1 infiltrate Baal's mothership. They decided that a small, surgical approach would probably be more successful than a larger head-on attack. They would need stealth to get in and get out in one piece. Jack, unsurprisingly, was not happy with sending them in, more than likely because he had first hand knowledge of what would happen to them if they were caught. Not that he would admit it, but he still had occasional nightmares about his time with Baal.

No matter Jack's reservations, not the least of which was the way the Tok'ra always managed to get them into more trouble than they bargained for, they all knew that the threat was too big to ignore and that nothing could be done without more information. So, permission granted, SG-1 was sent out with orders to ascertain what Enki's experiments were and to destroy any potential threats to Earth. According to Jacob's intelligence, Baal's mothership was currently orbiting a planet with no Stargate. They would be able to `gate in directly to the ship using the planet's coordinates, but they did, of course, run the risk of the ship jumping to hyperspace while they were still on board. They would have to be quick, unless they wanted to take a nice road trip with Baal.

Jack fought the urge to follow SG-1 through the `gate. He knew that they were the best and that Carter could take care of them all, but he was still filled with the need to be there to watch their backs. Promotions and reassignments aside, they would always be his team. Stamping down on his impulse, Jack calmly smiled and said "SG-1, you have a go."

Carter looked back at him and nodded, already in full-on Colonel mode. He knew she would bring them back, but he still silently wondered how Hammond had handled this for so long. Suddenly he felt bad that he hadn't been a little less reckless, probably would have saved Hammond some hair and stomach pain. Jack shook his head and tried to put SG-1 out of his mind by delving into the exciting realm of requisition forms.

...

Sam blinked at the complete darkness that engulfed her as soon as her molecules reintegrated on the other side of the wormhole. If she hadn't been a levelheaded, logical, scientist-type, she might have let herself wonder if the Stargate had finally goofed and put her back together wrong. Were the molecules that made up her eyes floating somewhere in space right now? Luckily Sam wasn't quite so whimsical, or at least not such that she would admit to it. With a soft click, her flashlight revealed a large room full of crates, quite similar to the room they had stumbled upon on Apophis' ship so many years before. Sam also didn't take the time to reflect on their good luck at finding the room unguarded. Instead, she gestured for Daniel to send the MALP back and set the rest of their plan into motion.

"Teal'c, get to the engine room and disable the hyper-drive. We don't want to take any unscheduled trips while on board. Daniel and I will start looking for the labs. Let's do our best to stay out of sight!" Teal'c nodded at Sam before slinking off towards the engine room. Daniel silently fell in behind Sam as she began a sweep of the level.

Two levels up from the gate room, Sam and Daniel stumbled into a room that served as a lab for Enki according to the intelligence provided by Ter'il. It was a large room with a bulky view screen along the back wall. Even though the room was in the typical gaudy, over-blown style of the Goa'uld, the air seemed sterile and reminded Sam of the smell of the infirmary back at the SGC. Another bank of consoles with Goa'uld writing covering it was against the wall on the right. Daniel automatically began checking out the information, looking for any clue as to what the lab was used for.

Sam wasn't sure what she had been expecting, but it would have been nice for there to have been a large, suspicious looking object in the middle of the room with a large sign in clear English that said "Evil Weapon." Of course, this was never the case. With a last glance at Daniel, who was already fully engrossed, Sam turned her attention to the last wall on the left. There seemed to be some sort of mechanism in the wall. Sam pressed a glowing rune and a large pod-like structure emerged from the wall. It was about seven feet long and a couple of feet wide. Sam peered into pod through the clear cover. She did not find the scary-looking machine she had expected. Instead, she found herself staring at a human child. The child appeared to be about eight or nine years old and was sleeping or unconscious. He seemed impossibly small and out of place in the sterile, white space. Sam reached out a hand to touch the thick barrier as if to reassure herself that the ghost-like vision was actually real.

"Step away from the boy."

The low voice brought Sam out of her shock at the appearance of the young boy. She whipped around to see Daniel standing, somewhat sheepishly, with his gun being pointed at his head by a young woman. She was about the same height as Sam, with brown hair pulled back in a severe bun at the back of her head. She wore a plain, off-white, shapeless gown of what might be something like wool. The woman's appearance, however, was not what caught Sam's attention, but rather it was the icy calm in her eyes and the ease with which she held the gun against Daniel's temple. Sam's gut silently warned her not to mess with this adversary.

The woman's eyes were hard as she pressed the gun tighter against Daniel's head. "I said, step away from the boy!" To prove her intentions, perhaps, the woman easily clicked off the safety and cocked the gun with one hand. The sound made Daniel blanch and kicked Sam into action. Sam raised her hands in the air and slowly began to step away from the pod.

"Take it easy, I'll do what you say." The woman didn't seem to be inclined to relax as the gun remained where it was as she carefully mirrored Sam's movements, slowly circling around the room until she now stood between Sam and the boy. With a quick motion that removed the gun from Daniel's head for mere moments, the woman hit a button on the edge of the pod containing the boy. The gun was back on Daniel before either of them could react.

There was a slight hiss as the top of the pod retracted and the boy began to regain consciousness. Sam felt a vague feeling of relief that the small child actually lived. The boy sleepily opened his eyes to take in the scene around him. "Haley?" he asked in a weak, raspy voice that betrayed his confusion.

The woman, who Sam now presumed was called Haley, looked back briefly at the boy to give him a reassuring smile. "Shhh...Jonathan, it's okay. Just stay where you are." All gentleness left her face as she turned back to glare at Sam once more. The woman was instantly all cool, calculated hardness before she tore her gaze from Sam's to consider Daniel for a moment. "You are not Jaffa."

Daniel refrained from shaking his head, probably far too aware of the cold steel pressed into his skin. "No, we are humans from a planet called Earth."

"You are Tau'ri?" the woman asked, looking from Daniel to Sam, with not a small amount of surprise in her voice. "But this one," she nodded towards Sam, "she has been host to a Goa'uld."

Sam's eyebrows rose for a moment in surprise before she clarified. "Not anymore, and not by choice."

Haley seemed to accept this, but apparently had no intention of letting go of her hostage quite yet. "Why are you here?" It was a statement more than a question, leaving no room for Sam to misunderstand her intentions. `Give me the information I want, or risk the consequences,' she seemed to be saying.

Sam had decided to play along, hoping for an opportunity to present itself or for Teal'c to reappear. "We received intelligence that the Goa'uld were creating genetic weapons to attack our planet. We came here to corroborate that intelligence and destroy any weapons that we found." It was perhaps too much information to provide to a complete stranger, but Sam was flying by her gut feelings at this point and there was something about the woman she couldn't quite identify.

Sam's instinct was rewarded when the woman seemed confused for a moment. "Genetic weapons? Here in this lab?"

"Yes, so you can imagine my surprise at finding a young boy here." The woman was beginning to look uncertain, and Sam took a moment to assess how she could get Daniel out of her grip. She decided to just keep her talking and maybe distract her with questions. "Is this your lab?" Granted, the woman was dressed far too subdued to be a Goa'uld, but Sam was getting all sorts of naquadah tingles, and she was fairly sure that some of it was coming from the woman holding Daniel at gunpoint.

Haley looked startled at the question. "My lab? No...only the gods work in here. I am in their care, like Jonathan."

No matter how dire the situation, Daniel didn't seem capable of holding back a snort of disbelief. "They aren't gods and they certainly don't `care' for anyone." Daniel's voice made Haley jump, as if she had forgotten she was holding a gun to his head. Luckily for Daniel, she obviously had steely nerves and didn't accidentally pull the trigger.

Haley readjusted her grip on Daniel before replying. "I know they are not gods. Forgive me, but I have never met anyone else who understood that. They would more than likely kill me if they suspected that I knew the truth."

"The truth?" Daniel ventured to question.

"That they are nothing more than parasites who use technology and fear to enslave. But something tells me that you already knew that." Haley's expression was hard once again, clearly indicating that she would no longer be distracted. "Tell me. What is your intention here?"

Sam took in the woman's protective stance over the child. She didn't seem quite old enough to be the boy's mother, but Sam was beginning to realize that Haley's aggression seemed to stem from a perceived threat to the child. `Time to test that theory, Colonel,' she ordered herself. "We are not here to harm you or the boy. If you have heard of the Tau'ri, then you must know that."

"Perhaps that is true, but I also know that you would not hesitate to eliminate anything you thought of as a threat."

"Other than the gun you are holding to my friend's head, you don't seem like much of a threat to me," Sam offered wryly. She wasn't sure why she felt that way, maybe it had to do with the fact that no matter Haley's apparent age, she still seemed somewhat child-like to Sam.

"But you came to this lab to destroy Enki's research, did you not?"

"Yes," answered Sam slowly as she tried to connect the dots to this surreal conversation. What exactly did one have to do with other?

"This lab is where we receive our treatments."

"Treatments?" That certainly sounded nefarious to Sam.

Haley merely shrugged. "I do not know exactly what he does to us, only that it is futile to resist." Sam didn't need to imagine the perils of defying a Goa'uld, having been party to their torture techniques more than once.

"Well, that's what we are here to figure out. Why don't you let Daniel go and then we can look at the lab files together?" Sam wasn't exactly ready to trust her, but she needed to convince her to let Daniel go. Then Sam could assess the threat-level of the Goa'uld `lab-rats.'

"You will not harm us?" Haley asked uncertainly. Sam could tell that she really wanted to believe it.

"No," Sam reassured her. "Maybe we can even help you, get you off of this ship and away from Enki, if you would like."

Haley appeared to be considering the offer. "I will let him go and accept your help on two conditions."

Sam didn't really think Haley was in a position to make demands, but she nodded for her to continue anyway.

"You will share all the information you find in the lab notes with me."

That seemed reasonable enough; Sam knew she would want to know what had been done to her if the situation were reversed. "Okay. And two?"

Haley paused and glanced at the young boy. "You will provide care for Jonathan and, if possible, fix whatever is wrong with him."

Sam's eyes darted to the boy. He was clearly in some sort of distress, his skin slightly jaundiced and his face gaunt. "I can't promise that we can make him better, but I can give you my word that we will try."

This pledge finally seemed to be enough for Haley and she slowly lowered the gun. She removed her other arm from Daniel's neck. Daniel released a deep breath of relief and quickly stepped away from Haley. It didn't escape Sam's notice that the woman kept Daniel's Beretta, but she decided to not push the issue as she began to search the crystals for relevant data. Sam was careful to keep one eye on the woman at all times.

Sam, with the translation help of Daniel and, surprisingly, Haley, managed to find a set of encrypted lab notes that apparently dealt with Enki's experiments. "We don't have time to figure these out right now. We'll have to take them back to the SGC."

Daniel nodded his agreement while Haley watched them both from lowered eyes. She stood next to the young boy, almost absently patting his hand. "Changing your mind, Haley?" queried Sam, who was not unaware of the woman's cautious glances.

The boy chose that moment to groan softly. Sam could see gentle tremors wracking his small body. His face shone with sweat and his lips were white with pain. Haley seemed to visibly quench whatever misgivings she may have had about them in the face of the suffering of the young boy. Haley turned back to Sam and shook her head. "I am ready. We should leave quickly before someone notices I have left my quarters. They will know to look for me here."

Sam simply nodded and toggled her radio. "Teal'c?" When there was no answer, she shared a look with Daniel. "Teal'c, please come in." Still no answer.

"He couldn't have been captured, right? Wouldn't they have set off an alarm or something? They would know he wasn't alone." Daniel's eyes were wide behind his glasses, but he looked at Sam with complete trust. Sam felt a momentary clench in her gut at the weight of that trust, but quickly tamped it back down. Before Sam could even begin to formulate a plan, however, Haley had crossed the room and begun manipulating the controls under the view screen.

Sam raised her weapon in alarm. "What are you doing?" she demanded.

The woman didn't pause or even look up at Sam, but answered with her back turned, reading off of the console. "Jaffa on level 16 reported an intruder in the engine room. Three other teams have been dispatched to search every level. Strangely, they have not yet posted a guard at the Stargate nor set off the alarm."

"Any mention of where they are holding Teal'c?" Daniel asked as he came up beside Haley, squinting interestedly at the console.

Haley pressed a few more buttons and after a moment turned back to Sam. "Holding cell C on level 8." Sam considered her for a moment, wondering at her motives and her sudden readiness to help them. Haley seemed to understand Sam's hesitation and shrugged at her. "You are our way out of here and I assume you won't leave one of your own behind. I can help you get him back."

"Okay," Sam said slowly, "how can you help us?"

"I know this ship. If I can get to the relay station on this level, I will be able to cut the power to the holding cells. I can also direct you on the safest path to your friend. You should be able to avoid any patrols."

"If you know this ship so well and are so desperate to leave, why have you never tried to escape before?" Daniel asked shrewdly.

"Escape and go where? I know nothing outside of this ship. Besides, the children have always been too weak to come with me. I would never leave them behind, they need me."

"Children? Are there more?"

Haley shook her head. "Jonathan is all that is left." Daniel looked like he wanted to ask more questions, but Haley brusquely interrupted him. "If you want to save your friend, we need to act quickly. I will go to the nearest relay center and cut the power to the cell level. You should retrieve your friend and then meet me in the gate room."

Sam couldn't argue with the logic of her plan, but didn't really like the idea of their new `friend' wandering around the ship by herself. She was still a bit of an unknown. "Fine, but Daniel goes with you."

Haley looked ready to protest, but Sam cut her off. "No. This is non-negotiable. Daniel will go with you. Besides, you will need his help to drop off Jonathan in the gate room before we put this plan in action."

Perhaps it was Sam's appeal to Jonathan's safety that finally convinced Haley because she silently nodded her assent. Sam took a deep breath and sent Daniel a reassuring glance. She couldn't be sure which of them was taking the bigger risk; she only knew that leaving Teal'c behind was not an option. They would simply have to trust Haley and hope that she really wasn't somehow a Goa'uld weapon to be used against them. Before she could delve too far into that dark thought, she set off to rescue Teal'c, the lab notes carefully ensconced in her pack.

...

The trip to the gate room had been uneventful, for which Daniel was immensely grateful. Between carrying the young boy and keeping an eye on their new `friend,' Daniel wasn't sure he would be able to handle Jaffa too. But Haley was true to her word and seemed to know the ship very well. She led them in a somewhat circuitous path to the gate room, but they did not meet another soul, which was more than likely her intent. Daniel hoped that Sam had been as lucky in her trek to the holding cells.

Upon reaching the gate room, Daniel had gently laid down the child behind the gate platform. Haley had leaned over the boy and gently whispered something to him that made him smile weakly and nod his head. Daniel was somewhat taken aback at the kindness and care that she treated the boy, after all, it had not been long since Daniel was sure she was going to kill him with his own gun.

Once the boy was comfortably settled, they silently set out through the long corridors once again. After another 20 minutes of what seemed to Daniel to be aimless wandering, Haley ducked into a small room that Daniel recognized as a relay room. With ease, Haley pulled open a bank of crystals and began carefully rearranging the many colored shafts. Less than five minutes later, she sat back on her heels and nodded at Daniel. He toggled his radio twice, sending the pre-arranged message to Sam. He heard his radio quietly click twice and knew that Sam had understood. It was time to book it back to gate.

Daniel thought that he really should have known that things were going far too smoothly. It shouldn't have been a surprise that they ran into a patrol on their way back. Daniel had been quietly following Haley, his mind on Sam and Teal'c when Haley had abruptly stopped in front of him.

"Dr. Jackson! Behind you!" rang out Haley's voice.

Daniel managed to lunge to the side as one of the Jaffa fired a staff weapon from behind. He wasn't quite fast enough, however, and he felt the blast sear into his leg. Grimacing, he looked up at Haley, who, even as she shouted her warning, quickly ducked behind a column to avoid a second blast in her direction. After a volley of staff blasts, she popped back out, Daniel's gun in her hand, and rapidly dispatched the two Jaffa warriors with what seemed to Daniel was military-like precision and cool. It was something he had often witnessed in Sam and Jack.

He had no time to ruminate on this further, however, as Haley appeared by his side, evaluating his wound. She wordlessly ripped off the bottom hem of her skirt and made a passable field bandage, all the while hyper-vigilant for other approaching Jaffa. Next, she began rummaging through Daniel's vest. He grabbed her hands, trying to ignore the pain in his leg.

"What are you doing?"

"This weapon is empty," supplied Haley, briefly waving Daniel's gun.

Daniel wordlessly handed her a clip and watched her reload the gun expertly. He thought to ask where she had become familiar with earth weapons, but the sound of approaching feet forestalled any conversation.

Haley dragged Daniel up with surprising strength. She supported him with one arm, Daniel's gun occupying her other hand. Daniel grabbed his zat with his free hand and they headed as quickly as possible towards the gate room.

...

Haley readjusted her grip on Dr. Jackson and carefully listened for the sounds of more approaching feet. Satisfied that they weren't being followed, Haley propelled them both forward once more. She noticed Dr. Jackson grimace as he put weight on his damaged leg, but he did not complain. Haley got the impression that he wasn't actually a warrior, but he still handled himself with great dignity. His eyes were constantly darting around their surroundings, but she couldn't tell if he was looking for evidence of more patrols or if he was simply interested in their environs. Haley knew that she, too, should be paying more attention to their path than her companion. After chastising herself briefly for letting her mind wander, she increased their speed, anxious to get back to the gate room and Jonathan, who would undoubtedly be frightened by now.

Colonel Carter and her rescued friend glanced up as they finally entered the gate room. Haley felt a moment of relief that they had made it back, but it quickly changed to panic as the new Tau'ri turned around. Haley released Dr. Jackson and stepped in front of him, her gun pointed at the large man with the gold mark of his god on his forehead. "Jaffa," Haley accused in a low voice.

"Haley, put down the gun. This is our friend, Teal'c, the one you helped us rescue." Colonel Carter's voice was calm, but firm, and her eyes darted towards the open door, reminding Haley of their precarious position. The pressure to get Jonathan safely away was at war with the burning in her gut at the sight of the Jaffa. How could they be foolish enough to trust the servant of a false god?

Dr. Jackson's voice penetrated Haley's confusion. "Haley, he is on our side, I promise. He fights with us against the Goa'uld." The Jaffa nodded solemnly as if to confirm Dr. Jackson's words. Haley really wasn't inclined to trust the Jaffa, but she was uncomfortably aware of her desperate need to get off of this mothership now that a way had been offered to her. So, against her better judgment, she lowered the weapon and wrapped her arm around Dr. Jackson again, helping him towards the gate.

Colonel Carter glanced at Dr. Jackson's wound, but at a nod from him she went back to dialing the gate, the Jaffa standing guard at the door. The wormhole engaged with a whoosh and Colonel Carter gestured for the Jaffa to grab Jonathan and go first through the gate. Haley tried to ignore the queasiness she felt at the sight of Jonathan swallowed up by the arms of the Jaffa. `You have no choice,' she reminded herself, `if you want to get out of here you need to trust them.'

"Haley, help Daniel through, I've got your six," ordered Colonel Carter.

Haley nodded and moved to comply. Haley could hear the stamp of approaching feet in the distance, and saw Colonel Carter pull up her weapon out of the corner of her eye, slowly back-peddling after them. Haley hesitated, almost imperceptibly, at the threshold of the event horizon. Dr. Jackson gave her a smile, "Don't worry, it's safe."

Haley was chagrined to be caught showing fear and without responding, she stubbornly heaved both of them through the glistening surface. She nearly stumbled at the other side, dizzy from the trip and faltering under the weight of Dr. Jackson. As she regained her stance, the sound of weapons being tracked on her was clear. They stood in a large, gray room and no less than 20 weapons were trained on her. Someone was saying something to her, a man standing at the base of a long ramp. Haley could not make it out; her heart was beating too harshly in her chest. Had she simply left one jailer for another?

"Haley," Dr. Jackson's voice was calm and reassuring in her ear, "put down the gun." Haley realized with shock that she was still holding his gun and that it was now pointed at the man standing talking to her a few paces away. She heard the plop of another body coming through the gate and the metallic sound of a metal wall closing over the mouth of the Stargate. She glanced back to see Colonel Carter taking in the situation, her eyes wide.

Haley finally realized what she must look like, pointing her gun and holding the wounded Dr. Jackson against her. She slowly shook her head at her own stupidity and lowered the gun. She offered it, butt-first to Colonel Carter, a small rueful smile of apology on her lips. The Colonel accepted it and moved to help her get Dr. Jackson down the ramp.

"Care to introduce our new guest, Colonel?" asked the man at the end of the ramp, even as people in white coats swarmed into the room with gurneys.

"This is Haley. Haley, this is General Jack O'Neill, he is the commander of this facility."

Haley did not give any indication that she had heard. Instead, having been relieved of her burden, she craned her neck around. "Where is Jonathan?" she demanded.

The General cocked an eyebrow at Colonel Carter. "The boy Teal'c brought through," she clarified.

"Ah, yes. He was taken to the infirmary."

Haley stiffened at this and turned accusatory eyes on the Colonel. "What are you doing to him? I thought we would be safe here."

"It's standard procedure. Everyone gets checked over by the doctor when they come back through the gate, especially new guests," supplied the General.

Haley turned to consider the Tau'ri leader. Something about him made her want to trust him, though as far as she could remember, she had never met anyone trustworthy before today. She decided to give these people a chance. It did seem a bit of a moot point, however, as she was already at their mercy. She would just have to see where this new path took her, hoping that anything was better than the Goa'uld. She nodded at the General, indicating her acceptance of this explanation, at least for now.

This seemed to amuse him, but he said nothing further to her. He turned to the Colonel. "Well, Carter, why don't you both head down to the infirmary? You can both be looked over and Haley here can see her friend. Briefing in one hour." He clearly wanted an explanation, but was willing to wait a bit for it. The Colonel nodded at her commanding officer and led Haley out of the gate room.

Haley resigned herself to being poked and prodded once she had assured herself that Jonathan was resting on a nearby bed. She was careful to note that the nurses preformed the same tests on her as they did on Colonel Carter, who currently resided in the bed on her left. So far, these Tau'ri seemed to be keeping to their word. Haley felt her eyes begin to get heavy, even though her mind moved at a fast clip, desperately reviewing her choices and wondering at the intentions of her new keepers. As if Colonel Carter was somehow aware of her misgivings, she kept giving Haley encouraging smiles to let her know everything would be okay. Haley couldn't quite bring herself to smile back, as she continued to fight her weariness.

She must have finally dozed off, because the next thing she knew, she was covered in a blanket and Colonel Carter's bed was empty. Haley sat up quickly, her heart thumping, only to release a long breath at locating the slumbering form of Jonathan. He was hooked up to machines and fluids, but seemed peaceful. Surveying the rest of the room, Haley noted two guards at the door, there for her sake no doubt. The Tau'ri seemed to trust her as much as she trusted them.

At the other end of the room was Dr. Jackson, similarly hooked up to machines, his leg heavily bandaged and elevated. With a glance at the guards, Haley eased herself from the bed. They instantly stood at attention. Haley's voice, much to her embarrassment and annoyance, refused to cooperate, so she simply pointed at Dr. Jackson, asking permission. The guards seemed unsure until Dr. Jackson's voice broke the silent standoff.

"It's okay, guys."

He smiled ruefully at Haley as she approached his bed. "Sorry about that, but we have to be careful about who or what we bring through the gate."

Haley nodded her understanding, but said, "You have nothing to fear from me, Dr. Jackson."

He seemed amused by this and Haley was forced to remember that not too long ago she had been holding a gun to his head. She blushed at the memory. "I did want to apologize for threatening you earlier. I just couldn't allow..." her voice trailed off and she looked helplessly at Jonathan.

"I understand, Haley. You thought you were protecting him. I'm just glad you asked questions first and shot later. Plus, you did save my life. That fact tends to make me want to forget about how we met."

"Thank you, Dr. Jackson. I, too, am glad I didn't have to shoot you."

He smiled at that. "Please, call me Daniel. You not shooting me makes us friends."

"Okay...Daniel." Something about this man made her feel comfortable and she was grateful that he could be so forgiving of her violent behavior earlier. Now she seemed to have at least one friend and something told her she would need them. Unbidden, her gaze traveled back to Jonathan, worry clear on her face. She turned back to find Daniel watching her.

"Do you think that your doctors will be able to help him?" she asked hopefully.

Daniel considered Haley closely for a moment, and she wondered if he could see through her carefully constructed mask. "I don't know, Haley, but we will do everything we can. We'll ask Jack and Sam when they get back from the mission briefing." As if magically summoned by mention of their names, Haley could hear voices in the corridor.

...

"Ah...space monkey. How many staff blasts to the leg does this make?"

Daniel was hard pressed not to roll his eyes. Jack really had to know how much he hated being called `space monkey.' "Ha ha. I feel fine, by the way. Thanks for asking."

"Good to hear," Jack said, totally ignoring the sarcasm in Daniel's voice. They continued to banter back and forth for a bit like this, Sam looking on in affectionate amusement. Sneaking a glance at Haley, Daniel could tell that she was somewhat mystified by their conversation. Perhaps she had never seen people interacting in such a way. He imagined that the Goa'uld did not have friends, or a sense of humor for that matter. The Jaffa would probably be no better, all stoic and intent on their duties. Daniel wondered, not for the first time, what life on a Goa'uld ship would be like for a human.

Haley seemed glad to be largely ignored and was intently observing them. Daniel was glad to see that she was beginning to relax and let down that ice-cold faade that she had been hiding behind since she first stepped through the gate. Of course, it did not last as Jack chose that moment to turn to Haley, having had his fill tormenting the invalid.

"So, Haley. You feel up to telling us a little bit about you and your friend? Such as, how long have you lived with the Goa'uld?"

Haley was obviously caught off-guard, which was more than likely Jack's plan. Daniel noticed a swift change take over her. Where she had been relaxed moments before, Daniel having finally broken down some of her defenses, she was now guarded, her posture stiff. Jack had effectively backed her against a wall. Typical, sighed Daniel to himself.

Haley seemed to also sigh in defeat as Jack continued to pin her with his unwavering gaze. He was making it clear that he was in charge and that he didn't have any reason to trust her yet.

"I have always been with the Goa'uld, as long as I can remember."

"And you don't happen to be a Goa'uld yourself?" asked Jack.

This question clearly shocked Haley. "What? No, of course not!"

"I only ask because you've got Teal'c's spidey-sense tingling. Were you ever a host?"

"I assume you mean that the Jaffa can sense the naquadah in my system. I imagine Colonel Carter can as well, she herself having once been a host."

Jack and Sam shared a look. "Well," pressed Jack, "can you explain the naquadah?"

Haley was seriously defensive now, her eyes narrowed. "I am not a Goa'uld, General, nor was I ever. Surely you must have a way to confirm this."

"Yes," spoke up Sam. "If you would consent to another test. Though, it won't help explain the naquadah."

"I can't explain, either. The Goa'uld were not exactly forthcoming with what my purpose was or with what they were doing to me. Surely the information we downloaded from the lab will be able to tell us."

"We are hoping it will. But it will take time for us to decrypt and translate it."

"And in the meantime, you have two unknown security risks running around. I understand. Do the test. Then at least you will know that I am not a Goa'uld." She turned to Jack. "Lock us up, if you must. But at some point, you will have to trust me." Somehow, Daniel didn't think it would be that easy.

...

"Do you have the results of the MRI, Doctor?" Dr. Warner nodded and Jack gestured for him to take a seat at the briefing table with the rest of SG-1.

"The test was negative, sir. There is no evidence of a Goa'uld. Her blood tests also show no signs of the protein marker that we found in Colonel Carter, so she was more than likely not a host anytime in the past."

"Well, there's that at least. But knowing what she's not doesn't help tell us what she is."

"Sir," interrupted Dr. Warner. "There is something else that showed up in their tests." He handed out folders to everyone at the table.

Carter opened her folder and peered at the image inside. "Wait a minute, aren't those..."

Dr. Warner nodded. "Yes. I found them in both patients."

Jack, holding his image upside down, asked, "Carter, what exactly am I looking at?"

"They're Goa'uld nanocytes, sir. Quite similar to the ones you were infected with on Argos."

"Whoa, wait a minute. You mean they are both infected with the things that made me old?"

Dr. Warner was quick to jump in. "Don't worry, sir. They are inactive in both Haley and Jonathan. With no signal to give them instructions, they are dormant. I already checked Colonel Carter, Dr. Jackson and Teal'c's blood. There is no evidence that they have been infested."

"I think the real question is why are they there?" asked Carter.

"Well, Colonel, I think I may have an answer to that as well. I ran extensive tests on the boy and have found that all of his organs are failing. I ran an analysis of his DNA and found major flaws. From what I have seen, I believe that the boy was made from genetic material and then artificially aged by the nanocytes to reach full maturity."

"Are you saying that he is a clone?" Jack asked incredulously.

"Possibly, though not necessarily. He could represent an attempt to create a human being from various sources of genetic material, not just from one person."

"And you say the boy is dying," spoke up Daniel.

"Yes, I'm afraid that there is nothing I can do to stabilize him. He will continue to decline and eventually his organs will shut down. It is quite similar to what happened to the boy the Re'tu made."

"What about Haley?"

"She shows no signs of deterioration and I was unable to find the same flaws in her DNA. It could be that she is a better attempt at whatever the Goa'uld intended."

"Or she could just be a normal human."

"No, Daniel, I don't think so, not with naquadah in her system. This is beginning to make sense to me."

"Glad to hear it, Carter. Feel like enlightening the rest of us?"

Jack saw Carter smile at his thinly veiled annoyance. "Well, sir, if you remember the intelligence the Tok'ra provided us, they said that the Goa'uld were experimenting with human DNA. We thought that they were trying to make a genetic weapon, but what if they were trying to make a perfect host? A host both human and Goa'uld?"

"You think that they were trying to combine human and Goa'uld DNA?" Dr. Warner asked almost incredulously.

Carter shrugged, "Well, it is just a theory, but it would explain the naquadah in their system. We should be able to confirm or disprove it when we gain access to the files we took from the lab."

Jack was used to Carter's theories turning out to be right more often than not, but was interrupted before he could say anything.

"Dr. Warner to the infirmary, Dr. Warner to the infirmary immediately," rang out a voice over the P.A. system. The doctor dashed out the door with the rest of them right on his heels.

...

They made it to the infirmary to find nurses clustered around Jonathan's bed and Haley hovering nearby, her face stricken. She looked up to find them standing by the door.

One of the nurses rushed up. "Dr. Warner, his stats are dropping. He suffered a seizure but responded with one round of ativan." Dr. Warner nodded and set about giving orders.

Haley, meanwhile, had sidled closer to Daniel. "What's happening?" she asked in barely more than a whisper.

Daniel looked over at her and put a comforting hand on her shoulder, wondering how much to tell her. At that point, Dr. Warner came up to them and shook his head. "It's as I feared." Haley stiffened under Daniel's hand.

"I'm sorry, Haley. But there is nothing we can do but make him comfortable."

Haley seemed to be trying to put on a brave face, lifting her chin and straightening her shoulders. "At least that is more than the Goa'uld would have given him. May I speak with him?"

Dr. Warner nodded and Haley moved back to Jonathan's bed. The boy was having trouble breathing and an oxygen mask covered most of his face. At her approach, the boy slowly opened his eyes and barely croaked out Haley's name.

Haley took his hand and made soft comforting sounds. "Shhh...Jonathan. Everything is going to be okay."

The boy continued to struggle to try and say something. "Tell...me...tell..."

Haley seemed to understand what he wanted and nodded to him. "Okay, Jonathan." She gently lifted the boy and settled behind him so that he sat on her lap. She tenderly wrapped her arms around him and began to speak in a low, soft voice. "There is a place where there is a long stretch of white sand along a wide blue ocean. It sits on the edge of a beautiful forest, full of trees and fruit and animals. Children run up and down the beach, laughing and playing and their parents sit under the trees talking gently to each other as they watch over their children. At night, they build giant fires on the beach and tell each other stories about the images in the stars above. And when the children are finally tired, their parents tuck them into warm, soft beds and kiss their foreheads and tell them that they love them.

"And so it is day after day. No one is ever hungry, scared or lonely. There are no demons in this place and no one is ever hurt." Her voice faltered for a moment here. "So when you go to sleep Jonathan, this is where you will wake up. No one will ever be able to hurt you again."

"Haley...there?"

"No sweeting, I won't be there, but all of the others will. They will take good care of you, and I will always be watching over you, even if you can't see me." She couldn't stop the tears anymore at this point, so she just let them fall.

"It hurts...Haley..."

"I know, I know. Just let go, Jonathan, just go to sleep and there won't be any more pain. Just let go."

The boy's eyes gently closed and the beeps of the heart monitor stretched further and further apart. Haley continued to gently rock Jonathan, all the while whispering words of comfort in his ear until finally there were no more beeps and his breathing stopped. Haley leaned down and kissed Jonathan's forehead. "Now you are free," she murmured.

Daniel led the others out of the infirmary to give some time for Haley to say goodbye. After about thirty minutes, she came out from behind the curtain. All tears were gone and her face was impassive once again. Daniel was the first to approach Haley, putting a hand on her arm. "I'm so sorry, Haley."

Haley shrugged off his condolences and looked up at the four people watching her. Her eyes were no longer gentle or even sad, but hard as granite. "He is the sixth such I have had to hold as they die. He is the sixth child I have lied to as they suffered an agonizing death. Someday..." her voice broke, but she seemed to roughly shake it off and continued in a stronger voice. "Someday the Goa'uld will have to pay for what they have done. I will make them pay."

Daniel shared a glance with Sam, raising his eyebrows at Haley's tone. He was beginning to realize that there were many depths to this woman: the collected warrior, the gentle caretaker and now, the hard-edged, vengeful creature. Daniel really wondered what she may have suffered in a lifetime with the Goa'uld and what her future now held.

If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Annerb

As the 'Gate Turns: Aftershocks

As the 'Gate Turns: Aftershocks

by Annerb

Summary: Daniel begins to unravel Haley's secrets, but unfortunately for the SGC, he's not the only one
Category: Action/Adventure, Angst, Drama, Series
Season: any Season
Pairing: UST
Rating: 13+
Warnings: adult themes, language, violence
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).
Archived on: 2005-03-09

Author's Note: Here's part 4! I hope you liked Haley, though now I'm gonna whump her a little bit, sorry! :) Triptnx and Montage: you are awesome, thanks for your help! Feedback: Always appreciated! (Plus, it keeps me going on the next parts! :)

Part 4: Aftershocks

Sam looked up as Daniel entered the briefing room with Teal'c right on his heels. Daniel's brow was creased in the way Sam knew meant he was either suffering a nasty headache or feeling the weight of a great injustice. Considering what they had all witnessed in the last few days, Sam imagined it was a bit of both. Sam still felt a burning anger in the pit of her stomach whenever she thought of the small child they had all had to watch die. Some days she wasn't sure she could really handle this job and this was one of those days. She found it hard to believe that even the Goa'uld could stoop so low as to use children, but then she remembered that Jonathan was not the first, nor unfortunately the last, to suffer such a fate. Sam made a mental note to call Cassie as soon as she got a chance. She just needed to hear her voice.

Daniel collapsed into a chair next to Sam, releasing a deep sigh, his thoughts no doubt as dark as Sam's. Teal'c merely looked sideways at Daniel before reporting to Sam. "ColonelCarter, Haley has been comfortably settled in guest quarters and I have assigned two guards."

Sam nodded absently at him, her mind still on the woman now being carefully guarded. She understood the necessity of security, but still felt a little duplicitous. She had promised Haley safety, not jail.

Teal'c settled himself in a chair across from Sam and looked carefully around the room. "Where is GeneralO'Neill?"

Sam gestured towards his office where he had been closed up for the last twenty minutes. "He's on the phone with the Pentagon, I think."

"Talking about Haley?" Daniel asked.

Sam shrugged, "Probably." Rubbing her temples absently, Sam turned to Daniel. "How is she, anyway?"

It was Daniel's turn to shrug. "Pretty much how you would expect. She didn't say anything to us; she just looked around the room and lay down on the bed. She is trying hard to put on a brave face."

"I can't imagine what that would be like. Seeing that once was already too much for me, but to see it over and over again..." Sam shivered as her voice trailed off.

Daniel put a reassuring hand on Sam's arm, but was interrupted before he got a chance to say anything by Jack entering the room.

Without preamble, Jack said, "The Pentagon is offering to take over the care of Haley. Though `offering' may not be quite the word I am looking for."

"What? She's only been here two days and they are already pressuring for us to hand her over? How did they even find out already?"

"Oh, you know, Daniel, good news travels fast," said Jack sarcastically.

"I can imagine. There are probably tons of people out there already, tripping over themselves to get a look at the Goa'uld `weapon,'" Daniel nearly growled in disgust.

Sam closed her eyes in exhaustion. She knew that there were many people who would do anything to get their hands on Haley. "We don't even know what the Goa'uld did to her yet. There may be nothing more extraordinary to her than simply having naquadah in her blood."

"We need to get those lab notes decrypted so I can start translating them."

"Unfortunately, Daniel, I don't think we have enough time for that. The Pentagon is sending a representative to pick up Haley day after tomorrow."

"We have to fight this," Daniel said vehemently.

"Do we?" asked Jack quietly, not looking him in the eye.

"Jack! You can't be serious!"

"Yes, Daniel," Jack replied dryly, "I am completely serious."

"You have no right to just ship her off like that!"

"Daniel! This is the front line defense of the planet, not some alien boardinghouse!" Daniel's eyes automatically darted towards Teal'c and Jack raised his hand to forestall anything more from Daniel. "Teal'c is different and you know it. We didn't let Cassie stay on the base forever either."

"Yeah, but she was adopted and still lives in the region!"

"I think Haley is a little old for foster parents, Daniel."

"I know that, but shipping her off to the other side of country to live with strangers is insane!" He looked desperately over at Sam. "Right, Sam?"

Sam had tried her best to stay out of this discussion-turned-shouting match. She saw merit to both sides, but didn't really want to get in to it. She sighed when both men continued to stare at her. "I don't like the idea of sending her away, but I also see the need to do it. This is hardly the place for a woman of unknown allegiance or background to hang out. Plus, far away from all this, she might actually have a chance at a real life. I think she deserves that, at the very least."

Daniel seemed to deflate as he lost his last hope for support. "They'll take care of her," Sam said softly. Now she just needed to believe it herself.

...

Daniel reached the surface to find Haley standing by the check-in point. She had been given some generic `Earth' clothes and had a small backpack in one hand. She stood with her eyes closed and her face turned up towards the sun. There was the slightest smile on her face. Daniel saw her take a deep breath before opening her eyes and looking straight at Daniel.

"Your world is beautiful," Haley said softly when Daniel reached her side. Daniel almost laughed at that, considering she was standing in the middle of a paved parking lot. "I always dreamed of one day feeling sun on my face and breathing open air. I just wish Jonathan could have had the chance to feel this too."

Daniel didn't reply but instead took a moment to close his eyes and try to feel what she felt. He opened his eyes again to find her watching him with a bemused expression. She smiled at him and said, "Sometimes it is hard to appreciate what is always there." She shrugged at Daniel's surprised expression and closed her eyes again. "Maybe I am actually the lucky one in some ways."

Daniel shook his head at the surprising ease with which wisdom seemed to fall from her lips. He had only known her for a week, and yet he knew he would miss her when she was gone. As if summoned by his thought, a dark SUV flanked by two sedans with tinted windows pulled up to the main gate. Daniel sighed heavily. "Haley, I'm sorry this is happening."

Haley smiled bravely at Daniel and shook her head. "I know you did what you could, but there is no reason to worry about me. I will be fine."

Daniel wasn't sure which of them she was trying to reassure. "I am sure that you will be fine, but I still wish there was something more I could do."

"I do not believe that General O'Neill would allow me to go if he did not think I would be cared for." Daniel's face darkened at the mention of Jack's name, still a long way from forgiving him for letting the Pentagon take Haley.

Haley reached out and put her hand on Daniel's. "He is only doing what he thinks is right. Anyway, my only regret is that I will be losing the only friend I have ever had."

"Not losing, Haley. I will be checking up on you to make sure everything is okay. If you ever need anything, or just want to talk, you can call or email me." He handed her a small card. "This is my email and my cell phone number." He shrugged at her slightly perplexed expression. "Someone will be able to show you how this works."

Haley carefully took the card in both hands and looked up at Daniel. "Thank you, Daniel, you have always been so kind, I won't forget it."

The driver came up at the point and looked impatient to get on the road. Haley looked forlorn as she moved to get into the car, steeling herself to being surrounded by strangers again. Daniel noticed her expression and before he stepped away from the car, he impulsively leaned forward and gave Haley a hug. Haley was startled momentarily and then gave Daniel a tremulous smile before closing the door. He wondered briefly if he was the first person to ever hold her. Daniel remained standing in the sun for some time, watching the cars disappear from the mountain.

...

Daniel threw himself into the translation work after Haley's departure. He locked himself away with the lab notes, desperate to get it done, not only because Haley deserved to know, but also because it was a good way to avoid everyone, namely Jack. Less than a week later, Daniel had all but finished translating the lab notes and what he was uncovering was far worse than anything any of them had imagined.

Jack, Sam, Teal'c and Daniel all met up for a briefing to discuss what Daniel had discovered. They were all curious, mainly because Daniel had been acting very strange lately and now, standing in front of them, he had the look of someone who would rather be anywhere else in the universe. Sam sent him a concerned look and Daniel seemed to flinch under her gaze.

"Okay, Danny-boy. Whatcha got?"

Daniel shuffled nervously through his papers for a moment before taking a deep breath. "I figured out what the Goa'uld were trying to do with Haley and why she is different than Jonathan and the others before him," he let out in a rush.

"Great. So fill us in."

"I...um..." It was unusual to find Daniel stumbling over his words; usually he was just up and running. "It's probably best if I just read the pertinent sections."

Jack and Sam shared a look, silently asking each other `what the heck is up with him?' Then Jack gestured for Daniel to continue.

Daniel shifted through his papers again, took a deep breath and began reading. "Subject #6 demonstrated the same physical weaknesses as the previous four and expired before being able to provide any information. Subject #1 is still physically strong and shows no deterioration or negative side effects from the treatments. The subject still has made no progress, however, and shows little promise. While she demonstrates some level of fundamental knowledge, such as the ability to speak, read and write Goa'uld and the Tau'ri language, she is unable to provide information regarding the Tau'ri defenses, the location of off-world bases or anything about the Tok'ra. Baal has suggested that more information may be revealed if she is made a host, but I have been granted a bit more time with the subject first. I plan to breed her the next time a Tau'ri prisoner becomes available. I hope that any offspring will show greater promise and may be able to provide the information we seek." Daniel had spoken quickly as if hearing it swiftly would make it less disturbing somehow.

The table was silent as they took in the detached language of the entry and the meanings behind what they heard. After a while, Sam somewhat breathlessly said, "Genetic memory."

Everyone looked around to stare at Sam. "Genetic memory?" Jack parroted.

Sam nodded her head slowly. "Enki was bragging that he found the ultimate weapon to destroy us. We assumed it was an actual weapon, but what if he simply meant information? If he created a human that had the Goa'uld ability to access memories stored in genetic code, then they would theoretically have access to the totality of human experience and knowledge."

"Such experimentation is forbidden, even to the Goa'uld," declared Teal'c.

Sam smiled wryly at Teal'c. "Just because something is forbidden doesn't mean that people don't sometimes try it anyway. Apophis broke the rules easily enough by having a harcesis child. Even the NID tried to blend human and Goa'uld DNA. Remember Dr. Keffler and Anna?"

"But Anna was...well, nuts, wasn't she?" asked Jack.

"Well, it's not an easy thing to do, as demonstrated by the Goa'uld's repeated failure even with advanced technology. Haley did say that she had seen six children die. They were all failed `experiments.' Even Keffler ran into a problem he didn't foresee. Somehow the Goa'uld's DNA that he used managed to take her over."

"Haley was here for an extended period and showed no signs of a second personality," offered Teal'c.

Sam nodded and looked at Daniel, who had remained silent throughout the conversation. "Did the notes ever mention any emergence of a second personality?"

Daniel shook his head, "There was no reference to anything like that."

"Okay, so the Goa'uld got one over on ol' Doc Keffler. But it still sounds like they didn't manage to get any information out of her, so they failed too, right?"

Sam didn't answer right away, instead she was thinking over what Daniel said again. "In the notes, Enki seemed to think that Haley would be able to know things about us and the Tok'ra. That means he must have used genetic material from someone from the SGC and the Tok'ra. Does it mention anything about that in the notes, Daniel?"

Daniel was doing a good impression of a deer in the headlights. Jack leaned over and poked Daniel. "What is going on with you, Daniel?"

Daniel started at the contact and then shook his head. He just gestured weakly at the papers in his hand. "This is one of the earliest entries we have: `A great opportunity has offered itself to me today. I will be able to begin my experiments anew and Baal will reward me richly when I am able to hand him detailed information about our enemies! Today three intruders were captured. While the female was interrogated, I scanned her, intending to acquire a genetic sample, but was startled to discover that the female carried an early stage embryo. I was quick to harvest it. The resulting child will be the cornerstone of my new project. It is unfortunate that the intruders later escaped, I know that Baal was especially angry to lose the sholva, he had planned to make an example of him.'"

Sam had always wondered how a room could `ring' with silence, but now, in the aftermath of Daniel's information, she finally understood. The silence was so complete that her ears seemed vibrate with the emptiness. She stubbornly continued her inane contemplation of the silence, anything rather than think about what that last entry seemed to suggest.

"Haley lacks the flaws the boy had because she is a human child who's DNA has been tampered with, rather than something made in a lab," Teal'c paraphrased.

Daniel nodded. "From the notes, it seems that they used a type of gene therapy to add certain strings of Goa'uld DNA. Then they used nanocytes to accelerate the aging process. She said she had spent her entire life with the Goa'uld, we just didn't realize how young she really is."

"And you believe that Enki's entry suggests that Haley is ColonelCarter's child," Teal'c stated bluntly.

Daniel merely nodded, looking carefully at the still-silent Sam.

"Are the entries time-stamped?" Jack inquired calmly of Daniel.

Daniel mutely nodded and began shuffling through his sheaf of papers. "The first entry is from about a year ago. I compared the date to our mission reports. It matches up with our run in with Baal."

"We were his prisoners for nearly twenty-four hours. Colonel Carter was taken from our cell to be interrogated by Baal," confirmed Teal'c.

"You can't actually be suggesting..." Everyone turned to look at Sam, who had finally been brought out of her shock by the guys' conversation. "I would have known!"

When they all continued to stare at her with a combination of pity and understanding, Sam just got angrier. "You can't possibly be trying to say that I not only was pregnant without knowing it, but that they also managed to remove my unborn child without any of us ever finding out?!" She looked frantically around at her friends, but none of them had anything to offer her. Her anger quickly fled and she found herself staring at her hands in numb disbelief.

Jack startled them all by abruptly leaving the table and ducking into his office. They could hear his voice speaking to someone on the phone. "Have Dr. Warner report the briefing room as soon as possible." It wasn't more than five minutes until the doctor appeared. Jack went straight up to him, his voice brisk. "Dr. Warner, I need you to run a paternity test on Haley. Do you have whatever samples you would need to do that still available?"

Dr. Warner looked slightly startled by the question, but taking in Jack's no-nonsense attitude, he simply replied, "Yes, General. I will, of course, need a sample from the other party as well."

"You will be comparing Haley's sample with Colonel Carter. Do you need her to accompany you or do you already have what you need on file?"

"I already have all that I need to run the test."

Jack nodded. "How long?"

"I could have it done by the end of today, sir."

"Good, get to it."

Taking that as his dismissal, Dr. Warner headed out of the briefing room, only to be stopped by Jack's voice. "Doctor, I expect you to run the tests yourself. This is not to be shared with anyone else."

The doctor nodded his understanding and exited the room, doing his best to tamp down his instinctual curiosity. He was smart enough to know when to keep his mouth shut and keep his musings to a minimum. And now was certainly one of those times if the expression on the General's face was anything to judge by.

Jack didn't stay in the room long after the Doctor left. He glanced at Sam for a moment, taking in her glazed look before he retreated back to his office. His voice could once again be heard talking to someone on the phone. "Get me Major Davis."

The conversation started out softly and the three figures still sitting in the briefing room, completely shell-shocked, were unable to make out much of it. That all changed a few moments into the conversation. Jack's voice suddenly rose dangerously and his tone was one that he usually reserved for dirty politicians and pompous Goa'uld.

"She WHAT?!" came the explosion from the office, causing everyone in the briefing room to jump. "And you didn't feel the need to inform us why?!" A few moments of silence were followed by a string of very creative curses. "Frankly, Major, I don't give a damn about jurisdiction. You have a report of everything you have to me with in the hour or so help me..." The vague threat seemed to have been enough because soon after, Jack slammed down the phone. He took a moment to lean on his desk and take control of his emotions as much as possible before facing the people in the briefing room.

They would have to be stupid, or deaf not to know that something was wrong and yet Sam and Daniel still looked questioningly up at Jack as he finally made his way back to the briefing room. He shook his head wearily at them. "I'm sorry. Haley never made it to the Pentagon."

"What do you mean, Jack?" asked Daniel tremulously, exhausted by the emotional strain of the last few weeks.

"Her convoy was hit outside of Washington."

Sam was staring at Jack as if the words coming out of his mouth were Ancient. "I don't understand."

Jack sighed heavily and looked Sam straight in the eye. "Haley was kidnapped and they suspect that it was the NID."

...

A couple of hours later, Jack ended up outside Sam's lab. She had abruptly fled the briefing room earlier and they had let her, knowing she had a lot of painful information to process. Jack stood outside her door, really dreading the coming conversation. With a final glance at the non-descript manila folder that Dr. Warner had given him, Jack knocked on the door and pushed open the door.

Sam heard him enter, but didn't look up from the naquadah reactor she was working on. Jack let her ignore him for almost five minutes before he sighed heavily. "Carter. You can ignore me all you like, but that's not going to make any of this go away."

After another minute or so, she finally looked up; her eyes darting from his quietly resigned face to the folder in his hand. "So," she finally said with false levity as she turned back to the machine on her desk, "Haley looks pretty fully grown to be a three-month old infant."

"We're going to get her back, Carter. I promise."

Sam ignored the accolade and continued to try and absorb the information she knew was now confirmed in that damningly everyday manila envelope. "I can't believe I never knew. I always thought that a woman would just know, somehow. I should never have gone through the `gate, if I'd known..."

"You can't possibly blame yourself for this."

"Why can't I?" Sam demanded, her voice beginning to rise. "If this is really all true, I let them take my child from me! And then, once she was finally free of the Goa'uld and their damn experiments, we practically hand her over to the heartless, self-serving NID bastards to do god knows what to her!"

"That was my call, Carter. If you need someone to blame, it should be me."

Sam didn't want to listen to Jack anymore and made a move for the exit. As she crossed to the door, Jack grabbed her arm. "Carter, I know it sounds like an empty clich, but I swear we will get her back, no matter what it takes."

Sam looked up at Jack and had to work to smother the urge to just lean into him for a moment. To let herself feel his arms around her just once more. As her mind drifted to long-suppressed memories, she jerked her arm from Jack's grasp and stepped quickly away from him.

"Carter?" Jack asked, confusion clear in his voice.

Sam just rubbed her eyes in exhaustion and shook her head. "I'm fine, Sir. I am sure we will find a way to get Haley back. I just...need some time alone right now."

Jack knew this was his cue to get out, but he couldn't help but think that Carter was just telling him what he wanted to hear so he would leave her alone. Deciding to let her win this round, Jack gave her one last long look before leaving her to the quiet solitude of her lab.

...

Daniel looked up from the ancient tablet he was trying to distract himself with to find Sam standing in his doorway. There was a manila envelope clutched in her hand.

Daniel gestured at the folder, "Is that..."

Sam just nodded. After a moment, she said in a broken voice, "She's my daughter."

"God, Sam. I'm so sorry."

"Not your fault, Daniel."

"It's not your fault either, Sam."

She didn't acknowledge his words, instead, she gestured towards his crowded desk. "I need a copy of the complete translation of Enki's notes. I need to know..."

Daniel thought it a cruel punishment to force herself to read everything that had been done to her child, but he understood the need. He handed them to her and before she could leave he said, "Sam. You know you can talk to me about this, right?"

She turned back at the door and looked at him with a ghost of a smile. "Not yet, Daniel. Not until we have her back." And then she was gone.

...

Major Paul Davis charged into the briefing room with a videocassette tape in his hand. Without any preamble, he strode up to the VCR and said, "You guys are going to want to see this."

"Welcome to the Mountain, Major. Permission to barge in granted."

Major Davis chose to ignore the General's ever-present sarcasm and simply nodded at him and said "Sir," in acknowledgement of his comment. "Agents just raided a NID safe house in Chicago." At Sam's hopeful look, he shook his head. "No, we didn't find Haley, but we did find three rogue agents in various levels of pain. And this tape." He pushed the tape into the player and footage from a sort of security camera came up on the screen.

In the black and white footage, they could clearly see Haley strapped to a bed in a dank, lab-like room. Along the back wall were computers and monitors, while a table next to Haley held surgical-looking instruments, syringes and what looked like tasers. At the moment, Haley seemed to be unconscious. After only a few minutes, however, two men entered the room wearing non-descript dark suits. They were apparently talking to each other, though the tape had no sound. Their discussion was interrupted when Haley began to have a sort of seizure.

"Oh, god," said Sam softly. She was being torn apart by what she was seeing and yet at the same time was strangely unable to look away. Jack unconsciously moved closer to Sam and put a reassuring hand on her arm.

On the tape, one of the men leaned over Haley. Haley immediately stopped seizing and the next thing anyone knew, she had grabbed his sidearm and efficiently knocked him unconscious with the butt of his own gun. Before the other man in the room could even react, Haley had freed her other hand and was pointing the gun at him. She was speaking to him and waving the gun threateningly. With her free hand, she made quick work of the restraints at her ankles. Free of the bed, she warily circled the man, who, seemingly at Haley's order, kneeled down and put his hands behind his head.

Haley was just reaching over to relieve the man of his gun when the door to the room opened and a woman in a white lab coat entered. The man at Haley's feet took advantage of the momentary distraction to knock the gun from Haley's hand. He took a swing at her, but she was ready. She ducked his blow and landed a solid hit to the man's solar plexus, momentarily stunning him. Haley pressed her advantage and efficiently cold-cocked him with one hit. He slumped to the ground, and now Haley was left facing one opponent.

The woman, upon taking in the scene in the lab, had quickly grabbed a baton-like taser from the table and now stood her ground in front of the only exit. She was making it clear that there was no way she was going to allow Haley to leave that room. Haley seemed slightly wary at the sight of the taser in the woman's hand. Haley dove for the gun on the floor to her left, but the other woman was faster and she lunged out to hit Haley squarely in the back with the taser.

The observers were thankful for the lack of sound as Haley fell to her knees; her mouth stretched wide open, obviously releasing an agonizing scream. Rather than debilitating her, though, the woman and her taser seemed to just make Haley even angrier. Haley spun quickly back to her feet, her hand making firm contact across the woman's face and was followed by a quick, ruthless kick to her chest that sent the woman flying against the back wall where she crumpled limply.

Haley stood for a moment, her chest heaving with exertion and anger before she began methodically sweeping the room, picking up all weapons. Haley carefully checked the pulse of the agents before tying each of them up securely. Before tying the woman up, Haley removed her lab coat and outer clothing. Haley discarded her own pajama-like clothing and quickly donned the other woman's clothing. She even took the woman's glasses. She then searched each body for wallets and cell phones. She took the money and credit cards from each.

Glancing up at the camera for the first time, Haley flipped open one of the cell phones and placed a call before leaving the room.

"She called 911 to complain that she heard screaming and what might be gunshots from the building, pretending to be a concerned neighbor," supplied Major Davis to the silent room after pausing the tape.

"She didn't want the NID guys to go free," hypothesized Jack.

Major Davis nodded his agreement.

"So where is she now?" asked Daniel.

"She is turning out to be a lot more resourceful than we thought. Our sweeps of the area revealed nothing, but we were able to trace some activity on the credit cards taken from the rogue agents. She purchased four train tickets and three bus tickets, each traveling to different major cities."

"She's trying to cover her tracks," observed Jack.

"Which means she doesn't want to be found," commented Daniel. "We convinced her she was safe and then we let her end up a lab experiment just like the Goa'uld! Of course she would want to get as far away from us as possible."

"Damn it, Daniel, now is not the time," Jack growled, looking pointedly at Sam, who was still staring at the television screen.

"How did she know to do that?" came the soft question from Sam.

"What?" Jack asked distractedly.

"She not only effectively escaped but also knew to dial 911 and to purchase bus and train tickets. She'd never even been outside this base or Baal's mothership before any of this. How could she possibly have been able to do any of that?"

They all stared at the screen, processing Sam's questions, but none of them had any answers.

...

Daniel sat on a small hill outside the Mountain. He tried to imagine what Haley would think of the trees that surrounded him. Taking a deep breath, he tried to relax into the moment. He had escaped the Mountain to find a few moments of peace. In the tunnels below this serene forest, people were running here and there, coordinating the search for Haley. They had checked out all of the destinations she had purchased tickets to, but no one was surprised when all they turned up were empty seats and dead ends. She was out there, somewhere, and they had no idea how to find her.

The peace of the forest was shattered by the shrill ring of Daniel's cell phone. Someone had obviously noticed he was gone. He sighed and picked up the cell on the third ring. "Hello?"

There was protracted silence on the other end, but something kept Daniel from hanging up. "Hello?" He glanced at the caller ID, but it showed an unlisted number. After another few moments of silence, Daniel, on a gut feeling, ventured to ask, "Haley?"

Another long moment passed before he heard the single word, "Why?"

His gut clenched at the accusatory tone. "Haley, we didn't do this, I promise. Please, just come back to Colorado Springs. We can protect you."

She snorted at that. "Obviously you can't," she said harshly.

"Please, Haley, we just want to know that you are okay."

"Okay?" she asked incredulously. "Do you have any idea what they did to me?" Her voice broke off, abruptly. He could hear her take a deep breath and then sigh. Her voice was softer now and laced with sadness. "I just wanted you to know, Daniel, that I can take care of myself. You don't need to worry about me." Before Daniel could say anything else, she said, "Goodbye, Daniel," and hung up. He stared at the inactive phone for long moments, desperately hoping that wasn't the last time he ever heard her voice.

...

Just as Daniel finished relaying his conversation with Haley to the others, Major Davis burst back into the room. "She used one of the credit cards. She's either getting desperate or getting sloppy."

"Where?" asked Jack.

"A small gas station near Miami Beach in Florida. We have people on their way to search the area. I'm flying out ASAP to coordinate. I think this is it, guys."

"I hope so," mumbled Jack, not quite sounding convinced as he watched the men file out of the room.

...

Getting in had been easier than Haley expected. It seemed that no one had thought that she would return to the scene of the crime. She abandoned the rusty clunker she had bought with cash in Chicago in a back alley in Colorado Springs and had hiked up the rest of the way to the Mountain. With the supplies she had purchased from a survivalist in Montana, she easily slipped down the access shaft, her mask protecting her from the tear gas. Soon she had stepped into the silent halls and didn't even have to hesitate as she headed for the nearest armory on her way to the security room.

Not much time had passed before Haley stood in the security room watching the various screens before her. She carefully stepped over one of the prone bodies on the floor as she switched one of the monitors to show the control room. There were only two bored looking young men inside. They would be easy to take out. Haley's major problem was in the form of General O'Neill who she could see leaning restlessly on his desk. Haley would have to be quick and quiet if there was any chance for her plan to succeed.

She managed to take out the first soldier with little fuss, but the second heard her coming. Haley managed to cut him off from the alarm, but he still managed to shut out the dialing computer before Haley disabled him with a single blast from her zat. `Dammit,' she thought to herself, `there was no way someone didn't hear that.' Haley turned to the computer and knew she would have only moments to get the gate going. Without giving it much conscious thought, her fingers began to fly over the keys. ...

Jack sat slumped in his chair staring mindlessly at a report in front of him. He really hoped that Davis managed to find Haley in Florida, but his instincts told him that she had already demonstrated far too much wiliness to do something as stupid as using a credit card. His phone ringing startled him, causing him to knock one of his files to the floor. He cursed quietly before picking up the phone, "O'Neill."

"General, sir, this is Major Davis."

"What have you got, Major?"

"Sorry, sir. All we found was a very scared teenager with some stolen credit cards."

Jack closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Alright, Major. Not really unexpected if you ask me."

"We'll keep looking, sir."

"Of course. Report back when you have more." Jack hung up the phone and sighed deeply, leaning back in his chair. He was beginning to realize that they would never find Haley until she was ready to be found.

He had just laid his head down on his desk to catch some quality office sleep when he heard the distinct sound of zat fire. "What the hell?" he muttered before he grabbed his phone to call Security. There was no answer. Just as he jumped up to hit the alarm, the PA system blared, "Unauthorized Gate Activation!" Over the din, Jack could vaguely hear the grinding of the Stargate rotating. He grabbed his gun from his desk drawer and headed down the control room to see what the hell was going on.

Jack entered the Control Room and noted the unconscious airmen just in time to see the Stargate swoosh into life. There was a single figure standing at the base of the ramp, silhouetted against the rippling surface of the gate. Jack slammed his hand down on the iris control, but nothing happened. He looked up to helplessly watch Haley walk up the ramp. She had only made it halfway when one of the blast doors slid open to reveal Carter and Daniel running into the room. They both stopped abruptly at the sight of Haley on the ramp.

Daniel had just reached out an arm and said something to Haley that made her pause for a moment when Teal'c and Walter charged into the Control Room. Teal'c regarded the scene with a raised eyebrow. "You have successfully located Haley," he observed.

Jack ignored him and turned to Walter. "Get that wormhole shut down, now." Walter nodded and began working at the nearest console. `Just keep her talking a little longer, Daniel,' Jack thought to himself.

...

Haley abruptly stopped when she heard Daniel call her name. She only needed to take a few more steps and she would finally be free, but she felt her treacherous body turn back to look at Daniel. Colonel Carter stood by his side and looked terrified, though of what, Haley could not say.

"Haley, please. You don't need to do this."

Haley glanced up at the Control Room to see a man working at one of the computers. She didn't have much time left. "I'm sorry, Daniel, but I can't stay here and you can't keep me safe."

"Do you really think it's any safer out there? What about the Goa'uld?"

"Maybe it's not any safer, but I won't stay here, because I finally realized something."

"What?" Colonel Carter asked softly, her eyes beseeching Haley in a way she didn't understand.

"You are no better than the Goa'uld," Haley stated bluntly before turning her back on them and walking the last few steps to the event horizon.

* * *

Haley's accusation hit hard on everyone watching, and Sam's eyes actually filled with tears. Daniel gave her a concerned glance and then stepped towards Haley. "Haley, wait." He glanced quickly at Sam before plowing on. "We translated the lab notes we brought back," he blurted desperately as Haley moved to enter the wormhole. This seemed to catch Haley's attention and she turned back towards them. She was careful to leave one arm in the wormhole, making it clear that in order to disengage the wormhole they would have to be willing to amputate her arm.

"I'm listening."

"You're not like Jonathan and the others, Haley."

Haley gave Daniel an impatient glare that seemed to say, `I already knew that, move on.'

"They were created in that lab. They were made, but you, Haley, you were stolen. They took you from your mother's womb."

This was not something Haley had already known judging by the look of astonishment on her face. She stared at Daniel for a moment. "Are you saying that I...have parents? That I'm not just some experiment?" Her face was so hopeful that it almost broke Daniel's heart. Daniel felt Sam come up beside him.

"I never knew, Haley. I swear."

Haley's eyes snapped onto Sam at the soft words. "What do you mean?" she asked suspiciously.

"He took you from me, Haley, and I never knew. I'm so sorry."

Haley seemed to sway on her feet for long moments before she finally found her voice long enough to say, "What exactly are you saying?"

Daniel watched the two women with his heart in his throat, allowing himself for the first time to catalog the physical similarities between them. He could almost see Haley doing the same thing, finding parts of herself in the woman standing in front of her.

At length, Sam finally confirmed, "I'm your mother, Haley. Please don't walk away."

Haley looked so torn, her face confused, hopeful and suspicious all at the same time. Daniel tried to smile comfortingly as he took one more small step towards Haley and stretched his hand out to her. "You can trust us, Haley."

"I don't know how," came Haley's soft voice.

"Please, Haley. Give us a chance, I can't lose you again," Sam pleaded.

Haley looked back at the woman who was her mother, her actual, natural mother. Someone she had hoped existed for so long. Now she was here, and she was promising to protect her, to take care of her. And Haley found herself desperately wanting to believe her. As she stood, concentrating on the woman that was her mother, a brief image flashed through her mind. Colonel Carter sat in a dark, dank room with a small child in her arms, both of them crying. I won't leave you, the promise echoed through Haley's head and she knew, somehow, that this woman had kept her promise at all costs. Maybe she could trust her to do the same with her own daughter.

Without consciously making the decision, Haley started walking down the ramp. The next thing she knew, her fingers were curled around her mother's outstretched hand and the wormhole behind her disengaged. A new chapter was opening for them both.

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